Post funny stuff here
- Thread starter Matata
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Thank you for the mood adjustment Matata!
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Lovesdogs, I can't wait to show the dog on the coach meme to my husband. That is my dog! She just looks slightly different.
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Doctor: "I'm sorry but you suffer from a terminal illness and have only 10 to live."
Patient: "What do you mean, 10? 10 what? Months? Weeks?!"
Doctor: "Nine."
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A man asks a farmer near a field, “Sorry sir, would you mind if I crossed your field instead of going around it? You see, I have to catch the 4:23 train.”
The farmer says, “Sure, go right ahead. And if my bull sees you, you’ll even catch the 4:11 one.”
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Two Elephants meet a totally naked guy. After a while one elephant says to the other: “I really don’t get how he can feed himself with that thing!”
Patient: "What do you mean, 10? 10 what? Months? Weeks?!"
Doctor: "Nine."
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A man asks a farmer near a field, “Sorry sir, would you mind if I crossed your field instead of going around it? You see, I have to catch the 4:23 train.”
The farmer says, “Sure, go right ahead. And if my bull sees you, you’ll even catch the 4:11 one.”
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Two Elephants meet a totally naked guy. After a while one elephant says to the other: “I really don’t get how he can feed himself with that thing!”
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Pessimist: "Things just can't get any worse!"
Optimist: "Nah, of course they can!"
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It is so cold outside I saw a politician with his hands in his own pockets.
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I was in a restaurant once and I suddenly realized I desperately needed to pass gas. The music was really, really loud, so I timed my reliefs to the beat of the music. After just a few songs I started to feel better. I finished my coffee, and noticed that everybody was staring at me... That was when I remembered I was listening to my iPod.
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A naked women robbed a bank. Nobody could remember her face.
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Optimist: "Nah, of course they can!"
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It is so cold outside I saw a politician with his hands in his own pockets.
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I was in a restaurant once and I suddenly realized I desperately needed to pass gas. The music was really, really loud, so I timed my reliefs to the beat of the music. After just a few songs I started to feel better. I finished my coffee, and noticed that everybody was staring at me... That was when I remembered I was listening to my iPod.
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A naked women robbed a bank. Nobody could remember her face.
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What a driver does when approaching a yellow light reveals his age.
If he tries to speed up and make it, he's under 25.
If he tries so slow down and stop, he's over 25.
... no coincidence that the mid-20s is when the brain is finished developing.
If he tries to speed up and make it, he's under 25.
If he tries so slow down and stop, he's over 25.
... no coincidence that the mid-20s is when the brain is finished developing.
The below was germane at my house on Christmas because Maggie, my female Westie, takes Finn's toys and won't let him ever play with them!!
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WESTIE PROPERTY LAWS
1. If I like it, it's mine.
2. If it's in my mouth, it's mine.
3. If I had it a little while ago, it's mine.
4. If I can take it from you, it's mine (here's the problem at my house!!).
5. If it's mine, it must never appear to be yours.
6. If it just LOOKS like mine, it's mine.
7. If I saw it first, it's mine.
8. If it's edible, it's mine.
9. If you have something and put it down, it's mine.
10. If I chew something up, all the pieces are mine.
11. If I get tired of it, its yours.
12. If I want it back at any point in time, it's mine.
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WESTIE PROPERTY LAWS
1. If I like it, it's mine.
2. If it's in my mouth, it's mine.
3. If I had it a little while ago, it's mine.
4. If I can take it from you, it's mine (here's the problem at my house!!).
5. If it's mine, it must never appear to be yours.
6. If it just LOOKS like mine, it's mine.
7. If I saw it first, it's mine.
8. If it's edible, it's mine.
9. If you have something and put it down, it's mine.
10. If I chew something up, all the pieces are mine.
11. If I get tired of it, its yours.
12. If I want it back at any point in time, it's mine.
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Couple funnies 
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Matata, thanks for starting this thread! 'Tis better to laugh than to ... well, anything.
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Saw a great license plate yesterday...
5ONOFAB
5ONOFAB
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Cats...
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Dogs...
I have a friend who sent a picture similar to the first recently. Her dog chewed the lock off the window so he could open it. (Large dog, large teeth, trashed window but the dog is fine)
I have a friend who sent a picture similar to the first recently. Her dog chewed the lock off the window so he could open it. (Large dog, large teeth, trashed window but the dog is fine)
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