How to decide on budget

[Joel21]

I know everyone would love to get the most expensive and highest quality ring for their partner but that's not always possible. I want to know if there is some guideline as to how much to spend on an engagement ring, for example, it may be three month's pay or something like that. Any help is appreciated.

 

[Crazie4Cuts]

Hi Joel,
It's really up to the intended buyer to set the amount for an engagement ring.I would suggest only spend as much as you can afford. It should not be considered an investment, but a gift for your future fiance. I think you should also discuss this with your future fiance and consider together what would be a budget you both feel comfortable with spending. I have seen young couples excited and overextend themselves at the 'tune' of $15k and put the ring on a credit card! Then I heard they had to work extra side jobs to pay it off...so I think that's not such a great idea.

The 2 month salary rule which was used in the past is also dumb! Many couples have debt already with student loans, car payments, personal expenses,etc... that having this added expense of an engagement ring to meet other's expectations is really unrealistic. You can think out of the box and place an emphasis on a meaningful ring that the two of you put together and that may include purchasing a fabulous ring on the secondary market. So take some time and discuss it with your intended, then come back here and educate yourself on diamonds!

Hope this helps!
-Crazy4cuts

 

[dazzlerazzle]

There really in no standard. The better question you need to get an answer to is: what does your gf want? Do you know if she wants a diamond center stone? Or a gemstone with diamond accents? Or JUST a gemstone? You may be sweating over figuring out how many thousands of dollars to spend on a diamond only to find out she wants a step cut white topaz... Next, if she DOES want a diamond, you should find out what C's she prioritizes. Some women absolutely want the iciest, whitest diamond their SO can afford. Others want a larger size and are willing to go down to such and such color to get it. Some women actually PREFER the look of warmer diamonds, especially in old cuts.

My SO wanted to get me a 2ct center, but was sweating over the price tag. Imagine how happy he was to learn I actually WANT an I or J color!??

 

[Joel21]

Thanks for the replies. That really cleared up a lot of confusion for me. Now the only question is how to get all that information from my girlfriend without giving the surprise away...

 

[pearaffair]

My philosophy is that the guy should spend more on the ring than he did on a tv for himself

 

[Jumpluff]

According to an expert-fueled report on Brides.com, the purchaser should spend about three full months’ salary on the ring. This is more a rule of thumb, however, and if the person buying the ring is “heavily in debt or concerned about job security,” he or she might want to scale back a bit. So...

 

[interestedinshiny]

It's whatever he spent on his car. The two - three month salary rule is dumb because some are more conservative than others. Take Mark Zuckerburg net worth 19 Billion he drives a Honda Accord, and bought his now wife a $25,000 ring. That's a little short of three months, but that is his financial style. You also have People like Kanye West Net worth of 100 million who spent 8 million on Kims ring. That is a lot more than three months for him, but he is a man that loves luxury purchases. The car rule is great because it allines itself with a mans budget for luxury purchases, and your wife can never come back and say you love your car more than her.

 

[bludiva]

Imho the two or three months salary rule is ridiculous and it should be what the couple can comfortably afford at the time. If you search, there's a thread of rings under 5k and many of them are straight up gorgeous. As dazzlerazzle said, it helps to know what your SO would want to prioritize. Good luck!

 

[crybaby]

I don't like the 3 month rule.

It really comes down to what you can afford, and if you're willing and if she's willing, pooling finances to get a bigger budget for a better ring if that's what she wants. I know not every couple is like that, but that's how my girl and I are.

I'm currently a dental student, and school rules prevent me from working while attending school even during breaks. The initial budget I had set for myself was 5k, and that was pulling from the disbursement excess of my loans. She wanted something a little more, and said she'd put down 2.7k of her own money. But, we're also not traditional couples in the sense that she doesn't believe in gender roles and would propose to me in a heartbeat.

Anyways, spend what you can without stretching yourself thin. But don't necessarily think that you need to spend the same amount you did on your car. My car at the time of purchase was 35k that my parents paid for, I could never afford to spend that much on a ring without being financially destructive. Her car was 21k, I know for a fact that she would not be able to afford to purchase me a ring that expensive if she were proposing to me.

If you're worried about her not liking it, maybe talk to her. Or, go with a jeweler that has an upgrade policy down the line where you can jump up to something more fancy.

With some of the expertise people have here, they can still find you an amazing diamond at a great price point. Also see if she's even interested in diamonds, she might be more into precious gems too.

 

[Bron357]

It’s what you can afford, after saving, without going into debt.
Engagement rings can cost between $50 and $50 Million.
Things to consider is her taste, does she want a diamond, a diamond substitute (Moissanite, Amora Gem) or a coloured gemstones.
If choosing a coloured gem, rubies and sapphires (in all their beautiful colors) are a hard wearing choice. Tourmalines and Garnets are also suitable and come in many colors.
Emeralds are lovely, but can be too soft for everyday wear (they don’t like “bumps or hits”) same for opal, too soft for everyday wear unless very careful.
Then metal - white gold, platinum,yellow gold or rose gold. Silver isnt generally not recommended, it isnt as secure for holding gems in settings and is difficult to rework ie alter sizing.
Then style - solitaire, halo design, side stones, bezel set, claw set etc
Then shape - round brilliant, princess, Marquise, emerald, oval, old cut etc.
See, it’s not easy. It’s actually a mammoth task.
For this reason, unless you know for 100% sure what she loves AND that she doesn’t want to have input into the design - DONT just guess.
Many is the somewhat sad and silently disappointed fiancé, though the intention was good the ring was just not “her dream ring”.
And for some ladies, that’s really important.
My suggestion, which many might not agree with, is if you aren’t sure and her friends or sisters can’t advise you, I’d go with a “Stand in” proposal ring.
A lovely ring with her birthstone (or yours and hers) as a proposal ring after which you both (or just her) can design/ find that perfect ring. At which time the lovely proposal ring becomes her special “right hand ring”.
For most woman their engagement ring is their most special and important piece of jewellery. For that reason it’s wise to buy well and buy what she dreams of.

 

[metall]

The 3 month rule is so antiquated. With the average student coming out of school in 10-30 years (30k-100k) of student loan repayments - it's not always feasible to put a full 3 months salary towards a ring. I know my SO spent less than 3 months - but he spent what he was comfortable with while still maintaining his own finances and taking my wishes into account.

You should talk to your future intended, if she is truly "the one" then her input should be just as important to you. The ring may be a gift for her - but when you're married your finances will mix and this is a good gauge of how financially compatible the two of you are.

I have read a pretty neat article that suggested that one way to determine what to spend would be half of your play fund for a year. For a lot of people that's generally the take out, the video game, the sports gear, shopping, travel etc budget. The theory is that your play fund is money that you would spend after paying for the necessities - housing costs, bills, grocery, loans, transportation needs, etc. - so it shouldn't put you into additional debt.