Should I change my plan?

[Gizmo 98]

See my post below for the specifics, but here''s the quick and dirty. My gf is flying into town where she will be picked up by my brother because I will have ''broken down'' on the way into town. While he is taking her back to his dorm, they will happen upon a sword arch with me waiting on the other end.
Here''s the problem...Her flight leaves somewhat early. She''s planning on wearing her hair up, glasses instead of contacts, comfortable clothes. I personally think she''s beautiful like that, but she has a different opinion. I plan on having pictures taken on the proposal, and I''m worried that she won''t feel pretty or think she looks good enough. I know she probably won''t think about it at the time, but I don''t want her to look back and be disappointed in her appearance.
I''ve already suggested that she wear her hair down and sort of dress up, but without giving a reason. That didn''t go over well.

I''d appreciate any suggestions, especially from the ladies.
Thanks,
J

 

[NoonersMom]

Hi Gizmo....

Instead of having your brother take her right to your location, consider having him take her to your room or his place first to freshen up. He could very politely ask how the flight was, what time she got up, etc. Then empathize with her & ask if she would like to freshen up....brush the teeth, let the hair down, etc. Then it''s not overly obvious. (He could make it under the guise of "I really need to use the facilities....would you like to use them as well")? Or if his place is on the way, he can use the excuse that he can''t wait & that he needs to use the facilities at his place.

Good luck & Keep us posted!

 

[Gale]

That''s a great idea NoonersMom. Perhaps you can call your brother to "Come and get me with my GF - let''s go for drinks after you pick me up." Don''t know if your GF will fall for that, but she might. Otherwise you might suggest that you want to do something special with her immediately after picking her up, so please dress appropriately (are there any sort of more formal events going on at the time?).
Gizmo, your plan is a really nice one. Don''t change it if you don''t absolutely have to.

 

[Cath]

Does she think your brother is going to be at the airport -- i.e., the two of you will be picking her up together? Maybe if she knows your brother will be there and she''s never met him, she will dress better etc. to make a good first impression?

Are your parents in the same area? If they are, you can tell her that they will also be there to greet her at the airport and that might also make her feel compelled to look nicer.

Final suggestion -- depending on what time her flight arrives, tell her ahead of time that you have made lunch reservations at a nice local restaurant and were only able to get them at ___ o''clock, so the two of you will have to go straight from the airport to the restaurant. To make this fit into your plan, when your brother shows up at the airport and says your car has "broken down," he can also say that due to your car troubles, you have cancelled the reservations and then he can take her back to his dorm as planned.

 

[Gizmo 98]

First of all, I don't know if I should be impressed or disturbed at how devious some of you can be. I think I'll go with grateful!

Here's what I tried. Finals start on Wednesday, so my brother has a study group/whatever starting at 1 o'clock. He also has plans that evening, so the only time we can get together is right after she lands. Now she's just a little pissed that I'd make plans when I knew she'd be 'scuzzy'. I'm afraid that if I push too much more, she'll either get more mad or suspicious. I'll just suggest that she freshen up during the layover. Honestly, I think she looks cute in her travel getup. In the end, she can't say I didn't try!

edit: Reading this again, I realize I wasn't clear. Saturday is the big day, not Wednesday. I'll post afterward and let everyone know how it went. I'll also try to get my gf to give her side of everything after I show her my previous posts.

 

[Gale]

Good luck on Wednesday! It sounds like it will be absolutely wonderful. You are right not to press your girlfriend any further. I do hope you come back and let us know how your proposal went.

 

[Cath]

LOL I don''t consider it devious if it''s for a good cause!

Good luck with the proposal!

 

[lillguy]

Would it be possible to just tell her that you guys will be going to straight from the airport. I always tell the lady that we''re going out and other women will be present. then she''ll be dressed accordingly.

 

[Gizmo 98]

Date: 5/2/2005 5:39:44 PM
Author: lillguy
Would it be possible to just tell her that you guys will be going to straight from the airport. I always tell the lady that we''re going out and other women will be present. then she''ll be dressed accordingly.

Yeah, that''s basically what I told her.  I mentioned it again, apologizing for making plans when I knew she wouldn''t look her best.  She said that she appreciated the fact that I was just looking out for her.  I''m just going to drop it and hope for the best.  I''m pretty sure she''ll freshen up either during the layover, or after she lands.  And I really need to keep perspective here.  The only reason I suggested she dress up a bit was so she would look a little better for the pictures of my PROPOSAL!  Big picture...who cares?  How many people get pictures of their proposal, anyway?  Isn''t it supposed to be a suprise?

 

[mightyred]

Date: 5/2/2005 11:12:38 PM
Author: Gizmo 98

Date: 5/2/2005 5:39:44 PM
Author: lillguy
Would it be possible to just tell her that you guys will be going to straight from the airport. I always tell the lady that we''re going out and other women will be present. then she''ll be dressed accordingly.

Yeah, that''s basically what I told her. I mentioned it again, apologizing for making plans when I knew she wouldn''t look her best. She said that she appreciated the fact that I was just looking out for her. I''m just going to drop it and hope for the best. I''m pretty sure she''ll freshen up either during the layover, or after she lands. And I really need to keep perspective here. The only reason I suggested she dress up a bit was so she would look a little better for the pictures of my PROPOSAL! Big picture...who cares? How many people get pictures of their proposal, anyway? Isn''t it supposed to be a suprise?

You are absolutely right ! Any pictures are a bonus.....you can always have ''official'' engagement pics taken later .

When she looks back at your posts (after the event!) she can see how much thought you have put into this including how she will feel about pics of the proposal .....she will be even more ecstatic - a ring and a thoughtful man. Perfect!

 

[Gizmo 98]

OK, I have a new problem.

My brother just told me he has to go out of town this weekend. My backup plan was to just pick her up myself, give her the 10 cent tour of campus, and take a break on the bench under the Century Tree. As I explain the tradition, I''ll slide off the bench onto one knee and pop the question. When I think about it, this might even be better because I don''t know how she would''ve felt about having the cadets nearby. This might seem more personal.
I''m also going to try to find one of those do-it-yourself flagstones that you can write anything on. I''ll put something appropriately romantic and sweet on it and stage it at the tree ahead of time.
Thoughts? Suggestions? Criticisms?

 

[AChiOAlumna]

I, personally, like your backup plan...it''s sweet, personal (especially with the flagstone!) and intimate...Also, with all the planning you''ve been going through, the only variables here are you, your soon-to-be FI and the weather...you don''t have to depend on anyone else!!

Good luck!

 

[bopitaddict]

Date: 5/5/2005 2:15:35 PM
Author: AChiOAlumna
I, personally, like your backup plan...it''s sweet, personal (especially with the flagstone!) and intimate...Also, with all the planning you''ve been going through, the only variables here are you, your soon-to-be FI and the weather...you don''t have to depend on anyone else!!

Good luck!

i agree with AChi, it''s simpler and personal... if you have people you know, you might ask them to hide and snap pictures of the proposal maybe... it might be nice to have some pics to reflect on. best of luck!