Calling all the Pregnant PS''ers

[mia1181]

Oh my gosh! Guess what happened!?!? My labor totally stalled! This is crazy! I don't know how I went from practically unbearable contractions to nothing... I was so desperate to get some rest for a big day today that I got back into bed and decided to rest between contractions and grit my teeth and bear them when they came. After a few contractions I feel asleep, waking up a little for each contraction and then I woke up at 5:30am realizing they had stopped. I got up, walked around, had another one and when it was over got back into bed and tired to rest again. Just woke up at 6:45am and haven't had one since. Ugh! Hopefully this is real and now that I am rested I can go walk around and bring them back. Going to do that now. Anyone have any other suggestions?

 

[Puppmom]

Mia, the same thing happened to me the night I went into labor. I was contracting and had bloody show at about dinner time. I took a bath and had some dinner and water per my doc's advice and the contrax stopped at about 7:30. I didn't have another until about 1:30am. Today still could be the day!

 

[pavelover]

Wow Mia! How frustrating! Hope things get started again soon. I guess since you are so far along, you can do what you want...spicy food, activity, maybe any of the old wives tales. I haven't experienced that so can 't say what works- oh I just thought of two things, lol. Neither one maybe very appealing...if your water didn't break, you can have sex? Or you could try nipple stimulation- pretty awkward for sure...I used it in the hospital (my water broke but labor wasn't really going very quickly) and they kept pressuring me to take pitocin. My husband "helped" me but I felt pretty goofy. We had contractions going at 2 minutes apart and the dr. Said she wouldn't even give me pitocin at that time since we were helping things along. Thing is I didn't feel like we could do it all day, kwim? Recently I heard about using a breast pump for the same reason. I wish someone had suggested that to me because then I wouldn't have had to have my dh standing next to my bed...lol. I can't believe I almost forgot about that . Good luck!

 

[mia1181]

Pupp. That's great to hear! I did have a bloody show this morning too so hopefully I at least dilated a little more. I'm still going to be optimistic that today is the day because I have all day to get something happening again. I went for a quick walk and had two contractions that I couldn't walk or talk through (but then nothing) so I'll probably be walking a lot today! If not I am supposed to call tonight at 10 to see if there is a bed for an induction at 12:30am. Now of course I'm thinking of postponing the induction because something is happening, but I also know I am an excellent candidate for induction with the progress I have made already.

Pavelover- Yeah I'm going to walk and mop the floors today to try and get things going. Yeah Nipple stimulation is awkward, but that's awesome it saved you from pitocin. You have to do it for a while though right? I actually did it a few days ago with my breast pump just for the heck of it and it didn't do anything. I did it for like 40minutes. Maybe I'll give it a try in the shower because my MIL is here and I don't want to have to explain to her what I am doing with the pump. I might just be stuck with walking! Either way I'm pretty hopeful that today is the day (or very early tomorrow)!

 

[pavelover]

Mia I did end up having pitocin because I was getting overwhelmed at having my dh help me for the next hours god knows how long. I knew I still had yet to start hard labor and then still had to push the baby out, lol. So it worked out but it wasn't my first choice...
It seems like the pump would likely help more now that you were already having contractions. I'll be reading to see what happens ! Labor dust to you!

 

[mia1181]

Hey guys just a quick check-in to let you know contractions have been all over the place today in frequency and intensity, but they seem to be becoming a bit more regularly (still at least 8 minutes apart). We are heading out for some dinner and hopefully things will pick up before I call to see if when I am supposed to come in to be induced. I'll keep you posted!

 

[Dandi]

Just delurking to say GOOD LUCK mia!!!!! And huge congrats to bean!!!!

Much love to all you beautiful mammas!!

 

[fisherofmengirly]

Yay for all these babies coming into the world!

Plugging along on this end. We will be 33 weeks on Tuesday. Baby continues to do great, praise The Lord!!! I have started getting significant swelling, but my bp and glucose remain fine. So I have to do a 24 hr urine test to see how my kidneys are doing. Yay for giant urine jugs you have to keep cold. Haha. I think it's funny especially since I can do it on a Sunday and I don't have to lug it to work in a cooler. That probably wouldn't be fun at all. Still, hoping for good news on the results side of things.

We had our maternity pics yesterday; so much fun!! Then we had our first shower and we were both so amazed by the love and sweetness of family and friends. It was a wonderful day. So wonderful that I fell asleep at 8:30.

I hope everyone here is doing well. Tao, thank you for your sweet comment--- the journey has definitely been a faith walk, but I wouldn't trade it for all the things I learned about The Lord, the strength the hubs and I have built up, and the joy we share now in celebrating this tiny, healthy little one's life.

Happy Spring Forward day to all (unless you are lucky enough to be devoid of it....).

 

[Miscka]

Waiting for Mia's update and story! Mia I hope it went great!

 

[tammy77]

Has anyone heard from LTS? The last time she logged on was Feb 22nd, starting to worry about her. I hope she's just busy being a new mama and updates us soon!

 

[Puppmom]

I'm hoping LTS and Mia are busy enjoying their babes! If you're out there we're thinking of you.

 

[mia1181]

Hey Guys! I'm just sneaking in to post quickly before our little girl wakes up to eat.

O was born on Friday 3/8 at 11:56pm. We ended up with a c-section after a very long labor but I'm really grateful that it was not an emergency situation and the baby was never in distress. O was 9 lbs 2 oz!!! I still can't figure out how that big of a baby fit in me and I only gained 30 lbs total! I'll post a birth story soon but everything has been going well. I'm healing quickly and O was breast feeeding within minutes of her birth and it has been her favorite thing to do since. We are home today and I'm feeling pretty good. I'll attach my last belly pic taken on my due date Friday 3/1. I know my belly looked huge but I was thinking 8 pounder at the most! Oh and of course a picture of our little girl!

 

[taovandel]

You looked gorgeous! And of course a gorgeous baby! Congrats!

 

[Puppmom]

Mia, congrats! You and O are both beautiful! I'm glad to hear everything is going well.

 

[tammy77]

Congrats, Mia! You look fabulous and your LO is flat out adorable! She's a big baby, that's awesome!!

 

[CurlySue]

Congrats, Mia!! So glad you are both doing well. Little girl O is just precious.

 

[JGator]

Yay, Mia. O is precious and you looked fabulous - especially for 9 months+! Hope you are getting some rest and enjoying your little girl.

 

[blackpolkadot]

Congrats mia!!!!

 

[pavelover]

Both pictures are gorgeous! Congratulations! Can't wait to here more!

 

[fisherofmengirly]

Mia!!! Two gorgeous ladies! Yay! Glad you are healing well. Where did you get a tiny bow that sticks to the wee one's hair??? I love it!!!

33 weeks today-- 24 hr urine screen and blood work showed my kidneys are fine, my glucose is fine, no concerns. So I just retain a lot of fluid.... So excited the baby is doing great and I am, too.

 

[mia1181]

Thanks for all the congrats everyone! We of course adore her!

Fisher You can use any tiny bow and you actually attach it to baby's head with a dab of corn syrup (some people use KY jelly too). You just put a little corn syrup on the bow, blow on it to dry a little and stick to baby's head. It stayed put all day. You just have to watch baby because it is a choking hazard. It washes off easily with water too. They sell bows on Etsy but I just looked around at Michaels for bows made for scrapbooking and I peeled the glue dot off the back of the bow.


Okay... the birth story:

Well I started labor on Wednesday 3/6 at like 9 or 10 at night. I had contractions that were regular and fairly intense in pain that started about 10 minutes apart and were about 8 minutes apart before I decided to try and get some rest to prepare for a potentially long labor. I went back to bed at around 4am, sleeping in between contractions but then I woke up at 6:45am the contractions were gone. I spent all day Thursday 3/7 walking around to get labor going and had contractions on and off all day. By 5 or 6 in the evening my contractions were coming regularly and by 10pm they were 5 minutes apart for an hour. I had an induction scheduled for 12:30am on Friday and I was supposed to call to make sure they had a bed available at 10pm Thursday night. I was so glad I was in real labor before my induction! I called at 10 and they told me to come in (I didn't mention that I was already in labor because they didn't ask. My contractions at this point were very painful but I was really proud that I managed them well. I walked, bounced on the birthing ball and moaned "Ohhhh" while focusing on my cervix softening and opening. I was 3cm dilated at my last appointment so I thought about each contraction opening my cervix further and further. I told myself if I made it until 11pm, I could try the bath. At 11pm I got into the tub and it was amazing! The contractions were still painful but much easier to get through. I found the laying on my back and pouring water over my belly with a cup helped the most (my tub is very deep but not deep enough to cover the belly!). DH came in the bathroom and we watched funny youtube videos as a distraction. It was really nice. I think the tub slowed my labor a bit but I think it worked out well because the drive to the hospital wasn't that bad.

We got to the hospital at 12:30pm and we were told that they had no more beds but to wait in the waiting room. We only waited for about 5 minutes (2 contractions) before they brought us back to triage. We waited in the triage room for about an hour before the nurse came in to tell us that they were too full and they called my Doctor and she agreed that I should go home. I told her “Um but I’m in labor now… my contractions have been at least 5 minutes apart for a few hours now!” Her response was “Well this is your first baby so it could take all night; you’ll be more comfortable at home.” I must have been doing a good job staying on top of the pain because I don’t think she realized how far along I was! She said they would do a NST before sending me home and hooked me up to monitors.

This is the point where I lost the ability to manage my labor. I was left laying in a bed hooked up to the monitors for an hour with no real way to cope with the pain. Without being able to walk, the pain was intolerable. After an hour the nurse came in and told me I was definitely not going home because my contractions were 2 minutes apart! Now her attitude toward me completely changed and she was the sweetest nurse. I am sure they get a lot of first time moms that they have to send home so I don’t blame her for being skeptical that I was in labor. She checked me and I was 4cm dilated. I had hoped for more, but I was happy with 4. I asked about the portable fetal monitoring but she said they were all being used by other women. We also had to labor in triage because there was no room for us in L&D. I requested the birthing ball and to be able to stand and walk around a little while being hooked up to the monitors. They brought me the ball but it hurt really bad to sit on it. I think her head was so low it was creating pressure. So at this point my only pain relief option was to walk around in 4’ x 4’ space next the the monitors and bed. Standing up was much better than laying down, but after a few hours of that, my legs began to give out. My legs were shaky and weak and my feet were tired. I was exhausted from barely any sleep Wednesday night and walking all day Thursday and laboring all night Thursday night. I couldn’t fathom the idea of continuing that way and then pushing sometime Friday morning or afternoon so I began the drug discussion with the nurse.
My hospital does not suggest drugs to you. I learned this after hinting about them a few times without getting any kind of a real response from the nurses! If I wanted them I needed to make up my own mind and ask for them! I felt that if I could just rest a little I could continue drug free so even though I was dilated enough to take the epidural, I decided on the narcotics instead. This was really surprising to me because in all my research I had already made my mind up that I would not get the narcotics and instead I would go right to the epidural because the narcotics have an effect on the baby whereas the epidural does not. But I was so proud of myself and encouraged by how well I was doing without the epidural I just knew that if I could rest my legs a little, I could do it. I took the narcotics and it was amazing! Haha! My body was so rested while my brain was just having a party of hallucinations! I slept for a good 2 or so hours and woke up feeling so refreshed and ready to go! I wish I could say the same for DH and his mom who were cramped on the pull out cot and freezing!
So I think it was 8am when we got transferred to our beautiful ocean view L&D suite. The narcotics had worn off but I still wasn’t feeling the contractions. The contractions had also slowed down at that point and interestingly, it didn’t hurt to sit anymore so it was as if the baby moved up a little. I was a little bummed that my labor seemed to be slowing again and of course I wondered if it was the drugs that had done it. I also have a theory that maybe my body was meant to go into labor over the course of a few nights because it was just like Wednesday night where I was in labor and it slowed in the morning/daytime. I guess I’ll never know.

At my next internal I was 5cm so things were progressing slowly but surely. I was rested and managing the labor okay. I was starting to get annoyed with the monitors again because every time I wanted to stand for the contractions they had to move the monitors to get a better reading, and then if I wanted to take a break and sit or lay in the bed they had to adjust them again. It was so annoying and really interfered with my ability to handle the pain.
At the next internal I was still 5 cm so we decided to go ahead and break the water. The nurse was really pleased with my contractions and assured me that even if we broke the water there would be no rush and since I am a first time mom this was a normal pace. She was amazing by the way (she was a labor nurse not the triage nurse from before)! By this time it was Friday morning and the crazy rush they had the night before was over and I had my nurse all to myself. She said I was her only patient and gave me the number to her L&D cellphone so I could call her directly if I needed anything. So we broke the water and the pain increased a little but I was still doing okay with my moaning! I got lazy and decided to stay in bed and just bear the pain using stress-reliever squeezies that I had brought, because I was so sick of them having to fix the monitors every time I moved.

The next internal I was still 5 cm so we decided to use a very small dose of pitocin. I was getting tired at this point and my labor was starting to look like my mother and sister’s and they both eventually needed pitocin to get things going. I labored without drugs for a while as she gradually increased the pitocin and then I hit a point where my contractions no longer looked like cute hills and instead were long plateaus that were at least 2 minutes long and sometimes leading right into each other. I started to try to hint about the epidural but the nurse was not going to tell me to get it (which I think is what I was looking for!). She just answered my questions with no bias and I could not read whether she thought I should get it or not. Looking back I am so thankful that drugs were never offered to me. I think I would have been way too impressionable in that moment and I am glad they forced me to make my own decisions! So finally I hit that point where I just wanted the epidural and I decided the next time she came in I would request it. Well it’s like she knew my plan because she never came back for the longest time and there I was getting through contraction after contraction but getting so tired. I finally had my husband call her cellphone and tell her I wanted the epi. I worried that she would say no because she never responded to any of my hints earlier. I also remember thinking she probably would think I was a wimp! Her response was “Perfect!” She came in immediately so happy and encouraging and told me I deserve the epi because I had done such a good job and labored so well for so long. The anesthesiologist came in right away and he was also a really nice guy who cracked a lot of jokes with us. Getting the epi was scary because I had to lean on my DH and my DH is terrified of needles and he was exhausted. I could feel DH shaking and I was nervous he was going to move (or faint!) and mess it up for me! Also DH was narrating the whole thing for me “okay so he’s putting in the needle, it’s long but not thick.” I was like “shut up! I’m not afraid of needles YOU are, so YOU shouldn’t be looking!”

So after the epi was in the plan was to go ahead and crank up the pitocin because baby was doing great and wasn’t showing any reaction to the pitocin and we were all so tired and ready for it to be over. The next internal, I was still 5cm so they put in an internal monitor (for the contractions, not the baby) to get a better reading. I guess the contractions were looking really good so they were confused as to why I wasn’t progressing.

After the next time they checked me the nurse told me I was still 5cm and that she had already talked to my doctor and they agreed I should go in for a c-section. She said it was up to me if I wanted to try longer and that there was no hurry but I just was not progressing. She said my doctor was at the hospital delivering for someone else and she would come in afterwards. I cried. At this point I was actually ready for a c-section. I knew something wasn’t right and I didn’t want to get to the point where my baby was in distress or that I would need and emergency c-section, but I still cried because it was not what I thought my delivery would be. My MIL and friends left DH and I to decide on a plan and we decided to give it another hour and then get the c-section.
About 15 minutes later my doc came in and brought my spirits up. She is amazing and I just love her! She wanted to do an internal of her own to confirm and sure enough she said I was 6cm! She had the nurse check herself to confirm and she agreed! But there was one problem. For some reason I was bleeding a lot. Towels full of blood. This made me really worry because it could be a placenta abruption and I used to be a nanny for a little girl who got cerebral palsy from a placent abruption. My doctor suspected it was from the cervix since I had a lot of swollen veins around there. She used a flashlight to confirm the blood was coming from the cervix and had me sit up in bed for a while to get the bleeding to stop. The bleeding stopped and the new plan was that I had 2 more hours to progress and if not I would have a c-section. My doctor also had to leave so I had to decide if I wanted a c-section with my doc or try for vaginal with the on call doc. I opted to try for the vaginal.

2 hours later there was a change in shifts so I got a new nurse who checked me and said I was 4 cm!!!! 4cm! WTF! I was so angry! I started to feel like the whole dilation measurement method was so subjective! I was so frustrated. So I asked for a doctor to confirm and sure enough she agreed and explained that my cervix was not closing but was swollen. I also started to bleed again and the doctor and nurse were frantically trying to get it to stop. At this point I was worried about the blood (although they assured me it was the sensitive cervix, I didn’t want to take any chances). I also felt like the baby was doing so well that this was the right time to end this labor. I was very happy and confident with the decision to have a c-section.

This is also the point that DH started to lose it! Poor guy was exhausted from being up all night and is really squeamish, but had to watch blood pour out of me. He was also freezing from sleeping next to the giant (ocean view!) window and I had the air conditioning on because I had a fever. DH told me he couldn’t come to the c-section with me and asked if it would be okay if his mom did! UM…NO! That would not be okay! I explained to him that he wouldn’t have to see anything and that he needed to be there for the birth of his daughter! He also asked that he wouldn’t have to hold the baby after she came out because of the blood. I was trying to keep it together but I was angry and hurt that I was having to worry about him and his blood phobias when I’m the one going in for surgery! I was also sad for my daughter who would not get to bond with either of her parents after delivery (me because of the surgery and DH because of his blood/bodily fluids phobia). I should also explain that this is a real issue for my husband, not just a guy being dramatic or immature. It sucked but it was what it was.

So they wheel me back for delivery and I tell all the nurses that my DH is very squeamish and it would be helpful if they didn’t offer him to hold the baby or cut the cord. As they took DH back I heard them asking if he had a camera. Once I was all set up, DH came in white as a ghost and shaking. He was fumbling with his cellphone (since the nurse told him he needed to take pictures). I told him to put the camera away and to hold my hand. They delivered her so quickly and the anesthesiologist held a mirror for us (I told him my DH didn’t want to look) to see her being pulled out. It was amazing! She was huge! She cried immediately and everyone commented that it was such a feminine cry!

They brought her right to me and put her on my chest! I was like “no wipe her off first!” and then I saw that she was already clean! They must have wiped her on the way! DH was like “she’s clean!” We both kissed her and they seemed to want me to spend more time with her but I couldn’t focus until my surgery was over. I kept asking how much she weighed but they said that I could spend time with her before they weighed her. I was like “oh you can take her I want to know how much she weighs!” They were shoving my organs back in and the pressure was horrible. I wasn’t feeling very good and as much as I wanted to enjoy my baby it was hard feeling pain in my stomach and nausea. I told DH to stay with baby and she got 9/9 on her APGARs and weighed 9 lbs 2 oz. She was 20.5” long. When I was finished (honestly felt like 5 minutes) they wheeled me out and it was amazing to see my wimpy squeamish DH holding and loving our baby. I have never seen him so happy or proud! I can’t believe I thought he wouldn’t hold our baby! I am so proud he got over his fears and I am glad that he got that initial bonding time where she was awake and alert. I didn’t get to see her eyes open until the next day but I am glad DH got that moment for himself.

So the pediatrician checked her over and asked to put her on my chest. I declined because I felt horrible and the last thing I wanted to do was throw up on my baby. Well the pediatrician insisted and I was so glad because the moment she put her on me I felt better and the nausea went away! Then an even more amazing thing happened and my little girl crawled across my chest and latched herself on my breast. It was such a magical moment! Nursing has been awesome and little O still insists on latching herself on. I was worried in the beginning that I might get sore nipples because she doesn’t give me time to latch her on and even if I do she pops off and goes on herself but I haven’t had any soreness at all. My milk came in before leaving the hospital and nursing has been going well ever since. Hopefully it stays that way for us! O has been a good baby. She only cries when she is hungry, which is an easy fix. But I am having a hard time recovering from the c-section. I am still on the pain pills more than a week later and everyone I know was able to stop taking them after a few days. I also have a fear that O is a good baby because I am still on the pain meds. But all in all, I’m getting better every day!

Sorry this was so long but I don’t want to forget any details for myself!
Good luck ladies! Can’t wait until you all are holding your own babies!

 

[tammy77]

Oh Mia thank you so much for sharing your birth story!! I cried so hard while reading the moments where your DH held her for the first time and her nursing with you. I simply cannot wait for that too.

I'm sorry to hear that your recovery is rough, but I do remember being on meds for a full two weeks myself. So maybe we're both wimps, or maybe the people you know are super strong. Also, you labored for a long time so your body went through quite a lot! Regardless, I'm sure all will be fine very soon!

 

[Iowa Lizzy]

Congrats, Mia! You are such a strong woman! That's a looooong labor!

Thanks for sharing your birth story. Post more pics of your big, beautiful girl when you get a chance. Glad the bfing is going so well!

 

[luvthemstrawberries]

Hi ladies! I'm so sorry for my absence and lack of updates. It has taken me almost a week to write this, with barely even having a chance to get on the computer at all. I’m finally at a place mentally where I feel like I can get some of this on paper, but the problem is finding the time to finish it and post it. Things around here have been turned upside down, and I honestly have just been trying to regain some ground back to where I feel somewhat normal again. Pretty much nothing went as expected, even though we were prepared to be very flexible, and this whole thing has been such a learning and eye-opening experience for me.

We had a boy! I went into labor early in the morning on Sunday the 24th, and Daniel was born at 1:48am on February 25. I'll come back and write the labor/birth story - I'm finally at a point where I feel like I can put a little time into journaling these things. He was born via c-section and was thus full of fluids. He spent his first day of life spitting up mucus like crazy, including some green stuff twice which really worried the doctors. They tried to do an xray to make sure he didn't have intestinal issues, but he couldn't even hold down the barium, so they kept saying they were going to transfer him to another hospital if he spit up any more green (thankfully he didn't). So between the c-section delaying us being together, and all his spit up issues, breastfeeding didn't get going well. The lactation consultants at the hospital were fabulous to work with, and they identified him with a posterior tongue tie as well. We did some pre and post weights from feeding, and found out he was hardly pulling any milk from me – sometimes he even burned more calories than he took in, which was so disheartening. So they got me pumping to keep up my supply, and thankfully my supply was great and we were able to feed him plenty of colostrum from the start.

He did lose some significant weight from the beginning though due to the breastfeeding not going well and all his initial spit up issues, and the lactation consultants encouraged us to stay an extra day or two to work on feeding. We agreed, but the pediatricians we chose were pushing formula on me despite the amounts of colostrum and milk I was producing for him. Also, despite how awesome the nurses were that took care of us, the constant interruptions were ridiculous - not so much for me, but it seemed like every time we'd finally get the baby settled to sleep, they would come in to do a heel prick or something else. We had enough and left after 3 nights instead of 4. It was a lot to take on, but we had to get out of that hospital.

On top of all that, we also set up an appointment to get his tongue clipped the very afternoon we left the hospital, so we came home and turned right around and left again to go to the doctor. I'm glad we got it done, and we've since had a followup visit to confirm that it's functioning properly now, but that was so much for me to take on so soon with the surgery and everything else we were dealing with.

Once we got home, I had a pretty hard time dealing with things for a while. The first few days were tough for me between still being really sore from the surgery, and dealing with some very overwhelming feelings about the baby and how much life had suddenly changed. I don't regret a thing, and it's not like I wasn't prepared and aware for what we were heading into, but I still dealt with some very unexpected feelings about how we suddenly had this little guy that is totally dependent on us, and it's not something we can take a break from - just very overwhelming. And between feeling that way and feeling bad for feeling that way, plus being extremely tired and sore, it was just really rough for a few days. I felt sick, I woke up with the shivers, I was so emotional, and I just felt so unsure of myself and what I was doing. Definitely not how you picture feeling with life with a new baby - they tell you the hormones will be all over the place, but I was so unprepared for how I really ended up feeling, and it just took me on this crazy roller coaster of extreme highs and lows. I assume it's all due to the "baby blues", since it has gradually gotten less and less extreme, but I still have been having some feeling of anxiety at some point every day. My mom stayed with us during the week since my husband has gone back to work, and she has been a lifesaver. My husband also really stepped up in those first few days back home, and I honestly would probably not have made it if it weren't for them. I felt so bad in those first few days because I honestly had no problem with the fact that they were pretty much taking care of the baby, and I basically was not doing much of anything besides sleeping upstairs away from everything to try to recuperate and feel better. I had a lot of nausea between the anxiety, figuring out my pumping schedule (not to mention the 2 hour bottle feeds during the night then turning around and pumping every time), and how much I need to be eating to feel well. I've realized now that I need to feel a little more connected too, so most resting I've been doing has been down here on the couch in the middle of everything and near the baby. Between that and being more involved now that I'm not as sore, the way I feel is improving every day - I'm not completely better and still definitely have my moments thanks to the lovely hormones and all, but I'm definitely improving. I still have a ways to go and still definitely rely on my mom and husband a lot. But my mom has gone home now and only comes some during the day, and my husband is good about helping when he comes home too, so I’m easing into things better now I think. I'm trying to go without the pain medication and just take advil too, but my incision is still pretty sore, and I have the worst shoulder pain ever thanks to all the tension and new positions with the baby that my body just wasn't used to before.

On top of all that, we also changed pediatricians to one we like a lot better, so even though that was a lot of stress to deal with, we are very thankful we ended up with one we're really happy with. There is also a lactation consultant there that I'm working with, and she has been wonderful so far. We haven't been breastfeeding much, so pumping has also been a constant in my life, and that has led to a lot of the overwhelming feelings as well with being so committed to so much for feeding him. He's also very gassy, so I'm just struggling with learning him and the difference in hunger, diaper, and those really sad gas pain cries. We did have a followup a few days ago with the lactation consultant, and I’ve since been using a shield which has helped tremendously – we went from no breastfeeding to doing it almost exclusively except for about once a day, when D gets to spend time with my husband and gets a bottle while I take a break, which is nice. There still is a lot for me to figure out with the feeding, and the whole breastfeeding thing actually freaks me out sometimes when I think about how the body is doing this thing that is basically uncontrollable, and it is capable of causing such a mess and so much pain, but is still so beneficial and amazing. Also, the lady wants to do another weight check this week since he doesn't sleep quite regularly and thus doesn't feed the recommended 8 times a day, so I have that on my mind too. But things are so much improved from where we were a week ago and 3 weeks ago that I have to remind myself to be so grateful for how far we've come.

Anyway, I’m sorry for writing a book here. And I’m so sorry for not coming back and updating you guys at a better time. I honestly just didn’t even have the mental or physical strength to get on here and write anything, in the hospital or once home or any during the past few weeks. I hope you’ll understand – maybe if I come back and deliver a few cute baby pictures I can redeem myself a bit.

 

[fisherofmengirly]

Luvthem!!!

Better late than never! SO very glad to know you are your son are safe, and good to hear things are going better these days.

Thank you for being so real regarding your feelings post birth- don't feel guilty; it doesn't change your love for the baby at all. There is so much going on, all this new stuff, all these emotions and then recovery, too. I hear you!

I will be praying for each day to be smoother as your family finds its new "normal" and I am sure your son helps you fall deeper in love each day!

*****
Mia--

I had no idea about corn syrup. Funny the things you learn....

Enjoy every moment with that pretty girl!!!

 

[monkeyprincess]

LTS, congratulations! I just wanted to chime in to say that I can really relate to a lot of what you said. I think those feelings are a lot more common than a lot of people are willing to admit. Bringing a baby home is such a life-changing event, your body has gone through a lot, your hormones are going crazy, you're sleep deprived, you have no time to yourself, your relationship with your husband changes, plus you had a c-section. All of that combined can really do a number on a person. I struggled a lot the first 4 weeks or so after we brought our son home. Even though I had longed for a baby for so long and loved my son tremendously, I felt like I had no clue what I was doing, that I was doing everything wrong, and that it would always feel that chaotic. I'm here to tell you, it gets SO much better. Just give yourself time to process your feelings and get used to your new role as a mommy. There is rarely a right or wrong way to do things. You just have to do what works for your family. Don't feel bad about getting support from your husband. That is his job too. As my doctor told me when I was telling her I felt guilty for letting my DH shoulder so much of the childcare burden, it's not like you are asking a stranger off the street to help take care of your child. He is the father, and it is his responsibility just as much as it your responsibility. I'm sure your DH is happy to do it and to be involved with his son. I know that is how my DH felt. And if you feel like it gets to be too much, don't be afraid to talk to your doctor about what level of baby blues is normal. Feel free to jump on over to the mommy thread if you have any questions. That was so helpful to me in the early days. Hang in there!

Also, belated congratulations on your beautiful daughter, Mia! Hope everything is going well so far!

Good luck to those of you who are nearing the end of your pregnancies!

 

[Puppmom]

LTS, first, I'm thrilled that you and baby Daniel are well and I'm so sorry your birth experience was traumatic. It sounds like it was scary.

I just wanted to assure that you that you are NOT alone in how you feel. Motherhood brings lots of great things but early motherhood especially comes with a lot that we don't often talk about. Let's see...it can be:

lonely and isolating
anxiety inducing
frustrating
guilt ridden
difficult on your relationship
deflating
confusing
exhausting

I feel all of the above on pretty much a daily basis. Sometimes, it's just for a few moments. And, don't get me wrong, I feel joy and happiness too. But, having a newborn is HARD, really hard. My biggest struggles at the moment are:

comparing my children - N1 is such a joy. I LOVE having a toddler...even when he's downright impossible. I sometimes look at N2 and think that I want time to move more quickly then feel guilty for not cherishing the moment. Sometimes, I'm jealous of the time DH gets with N1.

the overwhelming responsibility of being N2's primary caregiver. I sometimes feel trapped by breastfeeding and knowing I'm tied to his schedule. With N1, DH can pretty much do anything I can. But, when N2 wants to eat (which is obviously pretty darn often), I have to stop what I'm doing and tend to him. I look forward to him becoming an expert at nursing so I can wear and nurse and nurse when we're out and about.

and, along with the above, the resentment for DH that his life hasn't changed much yet since most of what N2 needs is mommy's milk. DHs can never fully understand how hard things can be, especially for a nursing mother.

Well now, I just laid it out there! I'm sending you hugs and positive thoughts. What's so great about this board is that we're all in this together so don't be afraid to share things that aren't fun. It's likely, we've all felt what you're feeling.

 

[Dandi]

LTS, congratulations! I just wanted to offer you my full support also. I really struggled for the first 8 weeks with O, to the point where I was treated for PPD. In hindsight it really was unlikely to have been that, I just really had a very hard time adjusting to my new life. I also had a caesarean and you must take as much time as you can to recover and rest. Don't ever feel guilty about that! My mum was a godsend too, just having her around when DH was at work so I could nap, was invaluable. My biggest piece of advice is that if you feel the need, please talk to someone about how you are feeling. I did, and my goodness it made a significant difference, best thing I could have done. My anxiety was overwhelming at one point, but as mp said, it really does get so, SO much better. I started to wonder what on earth we had done!! And now, oh my goodness, life has never been better, I love motherhood so much, words can't explain it. Chat here when you can, we are all here for you!!!

 

[pavelover]

Hi Everyone! Just a quick post and I'll try to return later...
Woke up Sunday am with virus(I think) that son and dh had- was stressed it would put me into labor. On call md said keep an eye and if contractions go get ivf. Symptoms stopped (took zofran and drank as much as I could). Felt awful all morning but thought it was false labor- pain only on left side, went away when I walked, took a bath etc. noon time came and I was having frequent contractions(but I guess I thought they were bh and painful because the baby was near my ribs(omg it hurt!). Showed up at hospital soon after that and they weren't catching contractions(which I still didn't know were real). When they fixed monitor they were 5 min apart- with ivf, still increased to q 3 min! Checked cervix and I was 3 1/2 cm! Holy smokes they said you are having these babies!
The on call doc was willing to let me try vaginal delivery but baby B had turned the opposite way(still transverse) and was back up I think? So doc said nothing to grab onto for him...c section soon after that- whew this was supposed to be short...
C and B born without any complications and were observed in nicu for 4 hours- been with us since, except when I gladly took the nursery respite option! Got home yesterday and it had been intense but still they are healthy, as am I! Couldn't ask for more!

 

[pavelover]

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