do you have friends that must ..

[Dancing Fire]

have more jewelry,a more expensive home,a more expensive car than yours?

 

[sonnyjane]

Well, I have friends that "must have" the best this, that, and the other, but it's not that it specifically has to be better than mine. I rent an apartment and drive a 10-year old dented Honda Civic so...it doesn't take much to outdo me

 

[iheartscience]

Nope, and if I did know someone like that, they wouldn't be my friends!

 

[kenny]

Not really.
My friends are both higher and lower income than us by huge margins, but I've never got the impression anyone simply MUST outspend anyone.

 

[junebug17]

No, and I really don't think I'd want to be friends with someone like that!

 

[manderz]

I don't, but my dad's bff is like that. We all kayak, and just one of his three boats is more expensive than my pair, and all 3 of my dad's combined. And, he got the same glasses as my dad, a newer, better (same color) truck after my dad got his car, and a multitude of other silly little things like that. He's literally my dad's more expensive mini-me.

 

[Lottie]

I don't have any friends like that but what an exhausting way to be! I assume that that kind of one-upmanship is fuelled by insecurity.

 

[tyty333]

No, I dont have any friends like that luckily.

 

[pregcurious]

Nope. I have friends and family who have nicer things, but it's not about me.

 

[soocool]

yes, and they have much larger debt than us!

 

[ihy138]

YES! It's pretty frustrating. I have a friend who was convinced my engagement ring could not be real when I got it. She tried to scrape it against glass to prove it one time. Needless to say, I'm attempting to distance myself. It's a little more complicated than that, unfortunately, because her boyfriend is good friends with my fiance. And the kicker is that she told her boyfriend that she wanted a ring just like mine, except BIGGER. I'm very happy with my 1.5 carat thankyouverymuch. It just made me realize that everything is a jealousy thing for her.

 

[diamondringlover]

No I dont, other then my Mom and sister, I by far have better jewelry then my friends and all the other family members (and my stuff isnt that great) as far as other stuff we are all about equal, except once again for my Mom, her caddy is worth more then most of our cars lol

 

[JewelFreak]

We had friends like that -- lots of fun & many common interests, but they got completely caught up in Everything Money. Bought a million-dollar house, fancy cars, a horse, kids in private school, vacations to brag about. None of that is wrong intrinsically, except the bragging part. Always talking about how expensive this or that was, their country-club friends, fur coats, yack! They teach this shallow snobbery to their kids, which is a big shame. In the end we had nothing in common, not because they have more money than we, but because they base their lives on people's bank accounts. We lost interest in them.

 

[TooPatient]

No. All of my family and most of my friends LOVE a great sale. It is common for one of us to find a great deal in some store and call anyone we think may be interested to see if they want us to buy one for them too. (my mom bought me 6 sets of Chanukah candles last year). We all love a great bargain and will quite happily volunteer what something cost if we think someone else might enjoy getting something similar for themselves.
I guess we do all break the "never discuss what anything cost" rule of pollite society...

 

[MichelleCarmen]

Well, I have friends that "must have" the best this, that, and the other, but it's not that it specifically has to be better than mine.

I also know people who must have the best and are constantly buying fancier stuff, etc., but none of the are close friends. In fact, one couple is so bad in their habit, that I hear other couples talking about how the money is wasted. I'm not saying that is a good thing, just that nobody would bother to compete with them as their investments are so unwise. And, as another poster said, that would be exhaustive.

 

[marchesa6989]

eurgghhh i know a girl just like that actually. before the episode, i used to think we were good friends - had similar tastes in fashion so we would often talk about it. we both mentioned at one point we liked chanel pearls. well she seemed to think that liking something meant she had claim over it, and when my dad bought me some as a PRESENT (not like i purposely tried to out-do her by buying it for myself first) she got into such a strop she didn't talk to me for months, and proceeded to bitch about me to other mutual friends. classy girl huh?

 

[Enerchi]

ugh Marchesa - that's too rude! Ditch that friend... fast!

We used to have friends that were big "one uppers" and it got old fast. We don't hang with them any longer. I felt it created an anxious feeling inside of me when all conversations had that competitive edge to it. No time for that mentality.

Enjoy and support your friends successes and who have obtained something they have longed for - but purposely going out and getting one better? Too petty for my liking.

 

[Madam Bijoux]

I don't know anyone who feels compelled to have better things than everyone else, but I do know someone who has to have what everyone else has. Whenever she sees that someone has a purse that she doesn't have, she searches the Bay until she finds it and buys it. She's always crying the blues that she doesn't have any money.

 

[Maisie]

YES! It's pretty frustrating. I have a friend who was convinced my engagement ring could not be real when I got it. She tried to scrape it against glass to prove it one time. Needless to say, I'm attempting to distance myself. It's a little more complicated than that, unfortunately, because her boyfriend is good friends with my fiance. And the kicker is that she told her boyfriend that she wanted a ring just like mine, except BIGGER. I'm very happy with my 1.5 carat thankyouverymuch. It just made me realize that everything is a jealousy thing for her.

That is so rude!!! I would NOT have spoken to her again after that!

I don't have anyone in my life who tries to outdo me. Thank goodness! I would really hate it.

 

[Dancing Fire]

I don't know anyone who feels compelled to have better things than everyone else, but I do know someone who has to have what everyone else has. Whenever she sees that someone has a purse that she doesn't have, she searches the Bay until she finds it and buys it. She's always crying the blues that she doesn't have any money.

MB...i want one of your Hermes handbag...

 

[Haven]

I haven't had friends like that since high school. This is by design, of course.

 

[violet3]

I haven't had friends like that since high school. This is by design, of course.

this.

 

[KaeKae]

Friends, no, but aquaintances, yet. So frustrating to be around. They not only have to have 'the best,' they have to tell you about it. The $3000 dishwasher, because it had to be 'truly quiet.' The $1000 boots, supposedly worn by celebrities. The most exclusive preschool, because the regular ones wouldn't do. Ironicaly, (since this is PS,) he refused to buy her a solitaire ring, 'because she already had one from her first marraige.' So, she made sure she had the widest, blingiest diamond encrusted band she could find, because they decided that would be 'the best' and made sure everyone knew it was more expensive than a solitaire. (I only saw it once, several years ago, so I have now way to make an eyeball estimate here, but honestly, is that crazy?) I do wonder just how honest they are about all of this, though. They aren't poor, but he's a cop and she works part time. I now he isn't the heir to a fortune, don't think she is, either.

 

[ihy138]

YES! It's pretty frustrating. I have a friend who was convinced my engagement ring could not be real when I got it. She tried to scrape it against glass to prove it one time. Needless to say, I'm attempting to distance myself. It's a little more complicated than that, unfortunately, because her boyfriend is good friends with my fiance. And the kicker is that she told her boyfriend that she wanted a ring just like mine, except BIGGER. I'm very happy with my 1.5 carat thankyouverymuch. It just made me realize that everything is a jealousy thing for her.

That is so rude!!! I would NOT have spoken to her again after that!

I don't have anyone in my life who tries to outdo me. Thank goodness! I would really hate it.

I thought so, too! I don't think she saw anything wrong with it...red flag much?

 

[Fly Girl]

I haven't had friends like that since high school. This is by design, of course.

this.

Exactly.

 

[mary poppins]

No. Very unappealing. I wouldn't want to be around anyone like that.

 

[Verdy]

My mother has a friend like that. Then again, she also has +20 more credit cards, and a debt that amounts to that of a new car.

 

[Amber St. Clare]

Friends? No, we are all pretty much laid back. I will admit to having nicer jewelry than they do, but don't flaunt it and they admire it without envying it, they have other interests that I admire. One friend collects guitars about which I know nothing but they make her happy...

HOWEVER:

I have a neighbor who insists on getting ANYTHING she sees I {or we} have--jewelry, security system, pool, backyard furniture, manicure--you name it. Drives me nuts. Our friendship long ago disintegrated but we still see each other given that we are neighbors and she just can't wait to run over and show me her newest purchase, no matter what it is. My tepid responses don't deter her.

 

[tammy77]

We have a "one upper" friend turned acquaintance we don't hang out with anymore because it extended into stories and conversations. If we said "oh we saw this really strange X" he'd HAVE to tell us how he saw something that was MORE strange. It gets old fast.

 

[ame]

Ugh, yes and it's obnoxious and I don't really consider them "Friends". I do have another friend who feels like she's constantly on the losing end of some competition with another of her friends. If my friend loses weight, her friend either has to lose more or rub it in her face that when she loses the same amount she just looks better than my friend. I personally think that my friend should ditch this person entirely, but whatever.