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Advice on buying an engagement ring

gembecile

Rough_Rock
Joined
Nov 27, 2010
Messages
10
Hi all,
Hope some of you don't mind reading about my situation and giving some advice. I know it is a bit long.

I am completely clueless about gemstones and buying jewelry in general. I have been wanting to propose to my long time girlfriend for a while now, but I was putting off the process of buying a ring. I want to get a sapphire, probably accented with some small diamonds. I really didn't know the process of getting a ring and just went into a random store (David Clay Jewelers in San Francisco). I was hoping to propose before Christmas not knowing how long this could take and not thinking about what is involved. Knowing my timeline, one of the saleswoman got an idea of the size and cut I thought I wanted, and said she would hunt down some stones for me.

She showed me a couple stones which are in my price range, and of course is pushing me to buy one. I haven't spent much time looking at stones with any other jeweler. The stones look good to me, but I'm not an expert by any means. I doubt I will make my original timeline, but in that case I was hoping to do it by the middle of January for an anniversary. I need to tell her whether I will buy one of the stones in the next couple days.

My questions are:

She says I need to buy a stone before Christmas or prices will go up. She also says that if she requests stones for me from the distributors, and then returns them, they won't want to send any a second time if I want to look again once I'm feeling more knowledgable. I also realized that a lot of jewelers in the area are by appointment only. She says that these sort of places, if they make an appointment for you they are really expecting you to buy something at that time. I know these are marketing tactics, but is there any truth to what she is telling me?

A big part of me really wants to do this soon, but if I do a thorough job of going to different jewelers, it will take me a very long time and there's no way I will propose on the timeline I was hoping. How stupid is it to buy a stone without going to numerous places and having people show you loose stones? I am not looking forward to the in depth process of the search and putting off the engagement, so part of me wants to just buy one of the stones, thinking that it looks good to me and it seems like a reputable place. Am I about to make a huge mistake?


Thanks in advance to anyone who helps me out!
 

SB621

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Aug 25, 2009
Messages
7,864
I would post this in colored stones- they have helped many people find beautiful sapphire engagment rings.

Jeff White is the most popular sapphire cutter I believe on the CS board. I personally would NEVER get a sapphire from a jewelry store. They typically don't know anything about sapphire treatment and always say it is "top color" when really it isn't. http://www.whitesgems.com/
 

Colored Gemstone Nut

Ideal_Rock
Trade
Joined
Nov 21, 2002
Messages
2,326
I am give you some advice straight to the point-

This is probably going to be one of the more important purchases you make. I would go to the knowledge tab on this site and start reading the Basic 4-C's than work your way down the list. Personally, the saleswoman your dealing with seems very pushy. If a Brick and Mortar store has any viable business relationship with they're distributior it shouldn't matter how many times they call in a stone for a potential client. The market trends on supply and demand and unless there is some secret she knows and the general public isn't in on, prices are not going to go up after Christmas.

You have two things working against you:

(1) Your Timeline, (2) Lack of Knowledge

What is important to you? I think I personally would put off making the impulsive buy to meet your Christmas Timeline, but this is so much easier said than done and I understand your dilemma. In the long run I would say get educated and hang out here and get some good advice. After you learn a little and set a criteria for what you are looking for in a stone I would than start looking at purchasing your ring.

Is there a way as Hokey as it may sound to Propose with a Promise Ring, this sounds silly, but I think if you explained your intentions of waiting for the big purchase with compromising and still giving a token of your love she might appreciate the extra effort and beauty that comes out of you putting forth the extra effort to getting her a nice ring with a gemstone that performs waay better than what you might be offered from the pushy saleswoman your currently dealing with.

Just a thought...Decide what is important and if waiting is start with the basics and then post more questions.
 

septemberbaby

Rough_Rock
Joined
Jun 30, 2010
Messages
21
Here's my somewhat uneducated thinking...

1. Don't rush the purchase of an engagement ring because it's something she'll have forever (hopefully) and you want to feel good about your purchase. My boyfriend and I thought it would take 1-3 months to pick out a sapphire ring, then realized it was gonna take much longer. We basically started in March and he's just about ready to take possession of the ring. We've done a lot of research along the way and both agree that it was good that we waited until we knew more about what was out there and what we wanted.

2. We've visited a few different jewelers and we made appointments with different people. It would be great if every consumer knew exactly which jeweler to visit so he didn't waste his time and the time of the jeweler. However, that's just not realistic. Sure, if you walk into a jewelry store, they will hope to make a sale. But that doesn't mean you have to buy. With that said, you should always be polite and understand that the jeweler has a business to run and that being a salesman is tough.

I don't necessarily think it's a terrible idea to have jewelers source stones for you. It really depends on where you live, what's available, and what you're comfortable with. Part of picking a stone involves looking at many other stones so you have some basis for comparison. You can also try to find a gemstone cutter in your area, look at what is available online, etc. I do NOT recommend working with someone via distance unless they truly know sapphires. You might end up sending stones back and forth and paying shipping fees because the stones were just not what you wanted. We initially tried to work with a jeweler in another state who, while having good intentions, just had no clue about the sapphire market. Needless to say, it did not work out. After trying out many of the options, we ended up getting a sapphire we'd seen in person at a gemstone dealer.

Hope that helps a bit and good luck!
 

jstarfireb

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Mar 24, 2007
Messages
6,232
High-pressured sales tactics would be a dealbreaker for me. I think you need more time to learn about sapphires. Lots of people here can help you with that. You can then continue your search at B&M stores and/or buy online from one of the reputable vendors we can recommend - they all have return policies.
 

minousbijoux

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Aug 5, 2010
Messages
12,805
Gem:

Some people go out and fall in love with a house and buy it, and others need to see many before they know which is right. I would suggest you think about this in a similar fashion; your fiance will undoubtedly have this ring for a while.

Since you are located in the S.F. area, you might want to head down to San Mateo for the Intergem show tomorrow. It comes a few times a year, and provides an opportunity to see a bunch of different stones so that you can compare color, shape and size. The good vendors at the show - and there are a few which specialize in colored stones - should not have a problem with you looking at their stones. The displays are right in front of you, and almost all of the stones are easily visible. My experience is that the vendors are helpful and are all about the stones, rather than a jeweler who sells stones as part of the jewelry process (though a jeweler you knew and trusted could be a great source for stones as well). Your biggest challenge will be deciding how much treatment you are comfortable with, as it ranges from no treatment (the rarest and most expensive) to the middle ground of heat treatment and then at the opposite end of the spectrum, treatments which introduce external elements to the stone. As you can imagine, good quality unheated stones will be much more expensive than those with full-on beryllium or other treatments.

Good luck - there are great people on this board who are extremely knowledgable and can help you navigate the process if you decide to take your time.

-Minou
 

gembecile

Rough_Rock
Joined
Nov 27, 2010
Messages
10
Thanks everyone, I needed to hear that. I think I knew what the right thing to do was, I just wanted an easy way out of learning everything. But that's a bad attitude, I'm sure it can be fun. I can kick myself for not starting this process a year ago, but oh well. I'll start with the knowledge tab, there's a lot to learn there alone. :read:
 

ooo~Shiney!

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Jun 6, 2010
Messages
1,501
Gembecile : (I love that name :sun: )
try reading the many posts from SteveNeedsARing.
Lots of ppl here have been helping him every step of the way with about the same thing
you are going through right now.....

First, he got help with the stone,
now he is getting help with the setting....
I admire the fact that you asked for help here
it must mean a lot to you that your Fiancee-to-be has
a beautiful ring that's exactly what she wants.

I imagine trying to buy an engagement ring from a Brick and Mortar store
at this time of year is akin to walking past most Perfume and Cosmetics counters
in big Department stores, as soon as they see you lookin' it's all over, babe......
Only get something now if there's no pressure,
and you see what you want and it's perfect...
There are lots of rings and stones out there, there isn't any "deadline".....
 

davi_el_mejor

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Mar 8, 2010
Messages
1,947
The thing about sapphires is they come in a lot of colors and a lot of treatments. Heated is the norm, and "accepted" throughout the trade. There are beryllium diffused stones. This is where during the heating process beryllium is introduced to the stones and a layer of color is added into the stone. It's a permanent treatment and not like a coating on topazes. There are also created sapphires.

There are available, unheated sapphires, but with that comes the need to certify and the premium placed on an unadulterated stone.

The important thing to know is what sort of treatments the stone has had and to pay accordingly.

If you let us know what you're looking for, color, cut, size, the treatments you're willing to accept and your budget, we could help you find a stone.
 

iLander

Ideal_Rock
Joined
May 23, 2010
Messages
6,731
Read over this thread from a guy with the same sapphire problem

[URL='https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/help-wanted-finding-a-sapphire-e-ring-so-i-can-propose.146843/']https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/help-wanted-finding-a-sapphire-e-ring-so-i-can-propose.146843/[/URL]

This is where he ended up, and he's currently looking for a setting

[URL='https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/got-a-great-jw-sapphire-lets-find-the-perfect-setting.151890/']https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/got-a-great-jw-sapphire-lets-find-the-perfect-setting.151890/[/URL]

To learn from this board, it's helpful to learn from other's experiences by reading through the threads.

Here's one I started on B/M jewelers in general, the vast majority just stink:

[URL='https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/gripe-list-your-brick-n-mortar-jeweler-problems-issues-rants.145065/']https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/gripe-list-your-brick-n-mortar-jeweler-problems-issues-rants.145065/[/URL]

Pay particular attention when the jeweler says a name in front of sapphire. I had a jeweler try to make me a $10K "deal" on a Chatham emerald. Chatham is, it turns out, a type of synthetic.
 

ruffysdad

Shiny_Rock
Trade
Joined
Apr 23, 2010
Messages
127
Boy, I hate pushy salespeople! Yeah, prices will go up, they always do. But it's an important decision and one you'll have to live with for a looooong time. Better to take a little time and educate yourself on the 4 c's and make the ring and gemstone something that you won't be looking at with regret for years to come. There are and will be good deals out there now, tomorrow, next week, next month etc. Take a little time and learn how to find them. When you take the time to get a little knowledge on gemstones, you'll get a lot more confidence and satisfaction out of what you buy. Not to mention the fun you can have with those pushy salespeople :mrgreen:

Pete
 

Arkteia

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Nov 3, 2009
Messages
7,589
I do not think prices will go up after X-mas because really good sapphires are unlikely to get marked down. They, however, may go down after the New Year. So I would not be pushed to buy before X-mas. And I tried to buy a sapphire via a B@M store, and was shown very nice stones, but prices were high. I got a beautiful sapphire via one of our renowned precision cutters, an award winner, and the price was much better. Even if you go to most expensive cutters here, prices will still be much better than in B@M stores. No one will push you to buy, although you may have to wait a little bit.
 

Porridge

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Oct 27, 2008
Messages
3,267
Ugh - her high pressured sales pitch would have had me running as fast as possible in the opposite direction! There is a ton of information here, and of course seeing as many sapphires as possible is definitely something I'd recommend. However, as Davi said, if you don't have time for that you could let us know what you want and we could have a look around for you. At least if you saw lots of pictures of good quality sapphires you'd be better equipped to tackle the jewellers!
 

baum

Rough_Rock
Joined
Jul 7, 2010
Messages
7
I had a similar pushy experience at the same store you went into in San Francisco. It was my first time looking at Blue unheated sapphires and the sales lady brought in a couple of stones for us. The stones looked pretty on our initial look, and the sales lady was pretty good at recommending settings and making you feel like you made a good choice. She said she was studying to be a gemologist and she seemed knowledgeable.

This was me and my boyfriend's first time seeing unheated sapphires in person and we really had no idea how to compare stones and even determine our likes and dislikes regarding a stone. We looked at several other unheated sapphires in San Francisco and had some vendors at the Jewelry Center search for us. We are still looking but one thing that we definitely realized was that the two stones we saw and liked at David Clay's were not as nice as some of the other stones we saw (even at lower prices). One of the stones was really asymmetrical and the other didn't have an even distribution of color. At the time we saw those stones, we didn't even have a good idea of what windowing is and didn't even check the sapphires to see if they had a window or not . I am so glad we are taking our time looking for the right sapphire. If we had bought the stone she showed us at the time, we would have regretted it especially after getting more educated via all the people posting on pricescope.
 

vinkalmann

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Oct 23, 2009
Messages
231
Congratulations on your coming engagement, it's an exciting time. Like was said several times above, I would recommend slowing down and educating yourself. If you take your time you will end up with a gorgeous stone and pay a reasonable price for it. Unlike diamonds, at least IMO, colored stones are unique and have life to them. You will need to do some looking, but you will ultimately find something that really speaks to you and you'll know it's the one.

I got engaged (now married) a year ago and it was kind of overwhelming at first. I'll say though, it gets easier after doing some reading. There's a lot of posts on the site with guys who have gone through exactly what you are. Poke around and you'll find all your questions are probably answered already. If not the guys and gals on here are more than happy to help.

Here's the post I made that recounted my experience.

https://www.pricescope.com/communit...ral-sapphire-company.132048/?hilit=vinkalmann

I used the Natural Sapphire Company for both the stone and the ring. Some people here have had bad experiences with them but for me they've been great. I've purchased the e-ring and both bands from them and the quality is top notch. If nothing else, I would check out the site since you can at least get an idea about cost and compare that to what you're seeing at the brick and mortar shops.

NSC is great for the newcomer to colored stones, but it's definitely true that you might be able to get a comparable stone for less elsewhere through one of the custom cutters. For me, the extra cost was ok because I got a lot of hand holding during the stone selection process and choosing the band. It seems like the custom cutters that people on the board recommend also provide really good service in terms of giving advice and recommendations so it's hard to go wrong.

The post linked above in the thread is a really good one where the guy is going the custom cutter route. I give him credit since that would have been beyond me at the time.

Again, congrats! Slow down and don't be pressured by ANY salesperson. The stones aren't going anywhere and anyone acting in a professional way isn't going try to manipulate you into doing anything. In terms of places that make appointments, you're under ZERO obligation to buy anything.
 

Arkteia

Ideal_Rock
Premium
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Nov 3, 2009
Messages
7,589
You know, in hindsight I realize that I bought Jeff White's sapphire, unheated, untreated and precision-cut, at a price well below what any B&M will charge you. Even my jeweler said it. How much would be off during X-mas sale? 30%? Not more, so you are going to lose. There are many threads re. setting here, and some inexpensive jewelers that mount in diamonds, since it does not seem you are leaning towards Leon Mege, so I'd go precision cutter's way. People who bought sapphires off Jeff's site got a much better deal than I did, because mine was specially cut for me. Browsing NSC, I realized that their prices are higher. Also, there is a huge difference between heated and unheated corundum, and if you look for unheated one, you avoid the risk of being sold Be-treated which is a 1000X overpriced cr..p. If you want to buy a ready-made stone from a company, buy from Costco website. Or Sam's club. Any jeweler's store will be very expensive. JMO. I probably went to all stores in my city in my quest for a good sapphire and the prices were about the same everywhere so I know what retail prices are.
 

Gempassion

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Mar 22, 2010
Messages
274
Hi Gembecile,

Definitely take your time since an engagement ring is an investment. Like others have said, you need to decide whether you want a treated or untreated sapphire. Do you a good idea about what your girlfriend likes?

I think that the best thing to do would be to decide on the stone, shape and style of ring setting in order to narrow down your choices so that you don't feel overwhelmed when you walk into a shop or shop online.

You can do some online shopping to compare prices.

I've heard some good things about brilliant earth and they're in SF:

http://www.brilliantearth.com/

Good luck, enjoy the selection process, and pricescopers are here to help so ask any questions you might have!
 

RockHugger

Ideal_Rock
Trade
Joined
Nov 10, 2009
Messages
2,974
If you don't buy by Christmas the prices will go up? Wow. I will tell you, sapphires arnt going up in prices. That was a naughty sales tactic to make you buy with her before you looked around.


You have to be careful looking for sapphires. sapphires can be highly treated with a chemical called beryllium to make it a better color. Some jewelers charge untreated prices for these stones. Make sure you ask if it's treated with beryllium. If you get a 'i don't think so' assume it is, and make sure your only paying the treated price.

There are many great vendors on pricescope. If you don't want to buy online, at least look through them to know what a treated sapphire and a natural sapphire go for, so you are not being taken advantage of!

Also, do not give in to sales tactics. If the sales lady/guy seems pushy, ask her to write the stone information on a card and go to a few more stores. Collect cards with info, so you can look back and make your decision without someone pushing you to buy.
 

gembecile

Rough_Rock
Joined
Nov 27, 2010
Messages
10
Hello again,

I'm disappointed but not necessarily surprised to say that I've made virtually no progress since I last posted here. Some people are just terrible procrastinators I guess.

I've started to look at a couple vendors mentioned here, like Brilliant Earth and Natural Sapphire Company. However I can now say that I am certainly fine with heat treatment.

In terms of Be treatment - if you're paying accordingly, I assume that the only reason people have qualms about this is because it's unnatural? In that case I'm probably not opposed to this either.

Do these factors change what people would recommend for me?

Thanks a lot.
 

Agnesg

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Apr 27, 2010
Messages
283
My DH googled " customizejewelry" and located a custom jeweler. Her service is excellent. And she is well informed about treatment of gems and is happy to work with a tight budget:) Maybe you might want to google and find one near your area.
 

chrono

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Apr 22, 2004
Messages
38,364
Perhaps I am incorrect but I think there’s been doubts about the business practices of Brilliant Earth and NSC on PS. If a diffused stone is declared and priced accordingly with the prospective buyer understanding how invasive the treatment is, then I’m fine with that.
 

T L

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Sep 20, 2008
Messages
25,168
"Brilliant Earth" or "Gem Earth?"
 

vinkalmann

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Oct 23, 2009
Messages
231
One major thing I learned from TL is that whatever you're looking at should have a certificate issued by someone other than the vendor. The vast majority of NSC stones have in-house certs. If there's something there (or anywhere really) that you're looking at, it's really in your best interest to ask to have it looked at by a reputable lab (AGL, GRS, etc) otherwise you really don't know whether that big premium on price you may be paying for a unheated stone is worth it. The same is true even if the vendor says the stone is heated only. There's a big difference in price between heated only and heated with BE diffusion.

Unheated or heated? It's all really up to you. Do you care whether the stone is rare and unique? Rarity looks like unheated > heated > BE Diffused. It's fairly safe to say that most of the sapphires you see in brick and mortar shops are BE diffused and heated at a minimum.

If you're mainly concerned about the color, you should have much more options with a heated or BE diffused stone at a lower price.

To be honest, out of all the people that have seen my wife's ring, not one person asked whether the stone was heated or not. I'm still very happy with the choice I made, but it's not like you'll get extra kudos from your fiancee's friends unless they're sapphire educated ;-)

Sorry for the convoluted answer...

PS: Did you see this post? It was a recent happy ending with someone in a similar situation:

[URL='https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/another-e-ring-thread-help-needed-blue-sapphire.156940/']https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/another-e-ring-thread-help-needed-blue-sapphire.156940/[/URL]
 

gembecile

Rough_Rock
Joined
Nov 27, 2010
Messages
10
Thanks everyone for the help so far. One more thing I'm wondering is, how important is it to have the finished ring in mind while buying the stone? I haven't really given a ton of thought to the setting; I have some general ideas of how it would look but it's very vague. If I pick the stone now do I risk not being able to make it work? Or can I worry about one thing at a time?

Also, for the trade off between high quality stone and size - how do I determine the minimum size I can get away with? The ring is size 6. If the stone was going to look too small in the ring, it wouldn't be worth it even if the quality of the stone was high. My budget for the stone itself is not more than 3,000.
 

Pandora II

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Aug 3, 2006
Messages
9,613
Get the stone first and then worry about the setting.

If you want to look at some fabulous stones, check out the sapphires at http://www.finewatergems.com/sapphire.html they are some of the nicest I have seen in a long time and I doubt they will be available for much longer (and I rarely rave about stones so take this as a big compliment from me about them! :bigsmile: ). They are also from Sri Lanka where beryllium treatment is illegal. The owner buys at the source so there is much less to worry about - the only Sri Lankan sapphires that are Be treated are those that have been taken to Thailand and then brought back again. Blue sapphires are much less likely to have been Be treated anyway than oranges, yellows, pads etc

Regarding treatments, I have no issues at all with heat treatment. Unless you really care about the cachet of having something rare and that is as it came out of the ground then there is no reason to discount it - in a sense it's a bit like the Graff/Harry Winston of coloured stones. An extra that costs a premium but that no-one will really know about unless you tell them.

Beryllium diffusion on the other hand is not something I care for. Stones are cooked up with beryllium to high temperatures and the beryllium diffuses into the lattice structure of the stone creating something that is not natural. Initially the diffusion was only on the surface and that caused issues if you needed to repolish or recut the stone. Nowadays the beryllium is diffused throughout the stone and is a permanent treatment. You can make pretty nasty coloured natural stones look amazing with this treatment. The biggest issue is lack of disclosure and that means you could pay a lot of money for a stone that is worth far, far less. I view them in the same way that I would view a clarity enhanced diamond - great for people on a very, very limited budget who want a pretty stone but not something I'd want to own or would recommend to a friend or relative.

Your budget for the stone is very nice and you can get a gorgeous stone for that. I would consider both heated and unheated and go for a stone that speaks to you.

Regarding the setting... what does your girlfriend do for a living? Does she like more antique style or more sleek and modern? What colour metal is her other jewellery? Would she want something with lots of sparkly diamonds or something more understated? Has she expressed any thoughts about the ring that she would like.
 

velouriaL

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Oct 21, 2004
Messages
1,178
If I were you, I would not go for any other treatment than heat.

I would look at other gemcutters people have had good experiences with on here. To name just a few (but CERTAINLY enough to give you a good start):
http://www.whitesgems.com
http://www.gemfix.com
http://www.torraca.net
http://www.acstones.com
http://www.concavegems.com
http://www.lisaelser.com
http://www.gemshoppe.com
http://www.finewatergems.com
http://www.mastercutgems.com
http://www.precisiongem.com
http://www.rwwise.com
http://www.wildfishgems.com

Be aware that cutters often have more than what's available on their site. You can email them and ask for more.

For size, you want to be AT LEAST 6.5mm and probably under 8mm. I would say 6.5mm-7.5mm would be ideal for me, but a lot of people on here prefer as big as possible. :) In my opinion, something that looks about the size of a 1.5ct diamond is perfect for an engagement ring. It's wearable for everyday and doesn't look like a cocktail ring.

I assume you're looking for blue sapphires? That's good. That narrows you down. You might want to take a look at this thread (as Lander mentioned):
[URL='https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/help-wanted-finding-a-sapphire-e-ring-so-i-can-propose.146843/']https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/help-wanted-finding-a-sapphire-e-ring-so-i-can-propose.146843/[/URL]

In terms of setting, worry about that after you got the ring, but do think about what style she might like. Antique? Classic? Modern? Organic? Three stone with diamonds? Pave or other diamond accents? Solitaire?
 

ml2

Rough_Rock
Joined
Mar 18, 2011
Messages
72
If you're in and around SF, I'd check out Joe Escobar in Campbell even if just to get an idea about settings, and what you like - I think they work with a colored stone source and they have this beauty on their website: http://www.escobardiamonds.com/showcase.aspx?ShowcaseID=3&id=92 so pretty!

my fiance and i are having our engagement ring made there as we speak... counting down the days!
 

gembecile

Rough_Rock
Joined
Nov 27, 2010
Messages
10
Pandora|1305914284|2926668 said:
Beryllium diffusion on the other hand is not something I care for. Stones are cooked up with beryllium to high temperatures and the beryllium diffuses into the lattice structure of the stone creating something that is not natural. Initially the diffusion was only on the surface and that caused issues if you needed to repolish or recut the stone. Nowadays the beryllium is diffused throughout the stone and is a permanent treatment. You can make pretty nasty coloured natural stones look amazing with this treatment. The biggest issue is lack of disclosure and that means you could pay a lot of money for a stone that is worth far, far less. I view them in the same way that I would view a clarity enhanced diamond - great for people on a very, very limited budget who want a pretty stone but not something I'd want to own or would recommend to a friend or relative.

I don't think I will go for a Be-diffused stone. But just because I'm curious about the attitudes of the gemstone community: if none of the disclosure issues existed, and the treatment was simply an option offered by jewelers of all skill levels, is it the case that the only argument against it is that it's unnatural? Because I was thinking, there's really nothing natural about cutting the stones in the first place. Particularly in cases where the cut itself is designed to hide defects in the stone (am I right in thinking that this happens?).

Your budget for the stone is very nice and you can get a gorgeous stone for that. I would consider both heated and unheated and go for a stone that speaks to you.

Probably too nice. I don't think she's expecting anything near what I was thinking of spending. I made the mistake of telling that number to one cutter...now they know what they can talk me into even if I try to ease it back down :shock:

Regarding the setting... what does your girlfriend do for a living? Does she like more antique style or more sleek and modern? What colour metal is her other jewellery? Would she want something with lots of sparkly diamonds or something more understated? Has she expressed any thoughts about the ring that she would like.

The setting will definitely be silver colored, although I haven't gotten a clear answer to the cost-benefit-analysis of platinum/palladium/white gold. The general idea is understated but elegant, definitely not antique but nothing too "funky" either (maybe that describes "classic"). I wasn't really into the pave setting when I saw it, don't really like the halo either. I had the idea of a few small diamonds on the sides, but I'm not sure exactly how that would work.
 

Pandora II

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Aug 3, 2006
Messages
9,613
Okay, next steps:

What colour sapphire do you want? What shade of that colour? What shape of stone? Do you want traditional faceting or a fancy precision cut?

I doubt the cutter will up the ante and overcharge you for a stone - it's not worth the risk to their reputation. But, learning what makes a $500/ct stone different from a $1,000/ct stone takes a lot of experience!

Regarding the treatment issue - it depends for me on what treatment one is talking about and where one draws the line. For example, at present the market is awash with lead-glass filled rubies. Some of these are up to 90% glass, many are made of bits of crappy red corundum glued together, coated with lead-glass and then cut. These stones look fabulous - right up to the point where your jeweller needs to retip the prongs and then it all melts into a little red mess! Even places like Macy's are selling these apparently.

Then there are the synthetics to consider. A synthetic sapphire has all the optical, chemical and physical properties of a natural sapphire, it just by-passed the whole being in the ground part. I don't mind about synthetics at all - they give great coloured cheap gems without the inherent disadvantages of glass or plastics or other simulants. But I definitely don't want to pay several thousand dollars for one just because it looks as good as the one that came out of the ground.

For me there is a certain something in having a stone that began it's life in an exotic location, that has been dug out of the ground and that a skilled hand has formed into a beautiful gem. For me heating is not an issue as it is basically what has happened in the stone's genesis anyway.

Lattice diffusion is messing with the chemical structure and high heat messes up the internal inclusions that I love. One of my all time favourite stones in my collection (okay, everyone gasp... it's not a garnet :-o ) is a 2ct blue sapphire that I bought from a dealer in the street in the gem-mining district of Sri Lanka on my honeymoon. It's beautifully cut, a very pretty periwinkle blue and best of all it has the most perfect intersecting rutile inclusions that twinkle like microscopic rainbows under a loupe. If the stone had been heated it might have been a darker blue but the part that I so enjoy would have melted away.

Your take on the whole enhancement/treatement/synthetics one is not uncommon and it's a big dilemma in the industry. My take is... everything has it's place and it's market but disclosure should be legally required as much as anything to protect the industry at all levels. The market in rare and costly padparadascha sapphires took a major hit when the Thais started producing them by the bucket-load with Be diffusion - no-one would touch them with a barge-pole. Who took the biggest hit? Not the high-street jeweller, but the guy who spends 10 hours a day down a 3m x 5m hole 30 metre down in the ground hoping to find enough stones to feed, clothe, house and educate his family.
 

gembecile

Rough_Rock
Joined
Nov 27, 2010
Messages
10
So, I think I'm making progress on the stone and I want to start thinking about the setting and learning how that part of the process works. Obviously people favor working with precision cutters/online vendors to going local for the stone itself - to what extent is this true for the setting? In many ways it seems simpler to have the setting made by a local vendor (I am near San Francisco). Are there good options for me in that case?

Otherwise, I guess I just need to look through a ton of settings to get a sense of what can be done. A lot of what I see I don't really like, so this could be more difficult than the stone...
 
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