Asking for parents'' blessing?

[hopelesslylost]

I had originally planned on doing this, but I''m worried her parents won''t be able to keep it a secret? I''ve finally found a ring after a year and managed to keep it a total secret this long - should I risk blowing the secret? She talks with her parents a couple times a week, and if I wanted to ask the parents in person, I would have to ask about a week in advance. I don''t think her parents would intentionally let her know, but I think they might accidentally let it slip. Suggestions?

 

[treefrog]

I had the same fears. My situation may have been slightly different though as her parents don''t live near us. I called them and I waited until the night before the planned proposal to minimize the risks of it getting leaked out.

Warning... should you happen to get an answering machine... think carefully about what to say. That threw me for a loop. I didn''t want to mention it in the msg and after leaving an odd message (my calling was unusual and could have set off alarms)... I called back to leave a message saying she was ok... no reason for alarm... etc. Fortunately, her dad picked up the phone when I called right back to clarify.

Treefrog

 

[agirlcalledchuck]

i think you''ll be surprised at how good parents are at keeping things like this a secret - my parents and i are very, very close - i speak to them nearly every single day - and they managed to keep my proposal a secret for an entire month! in fact, my fiance had "the talk" with my dad while my mother an i had gone to lunch together one afternoon. later that night we attended a friend''s wedding, and he pulled my mother to the side at the reception and revealed his plans to her - i''m still amazed that i had no clue that any of this went down!

some people might think the tradition of asking for the parent''s blessing is "old fashioned" but to me, its a must! it was an awesome thing for me to know that when my fiance proposed, it was with the blessing of my father and mother, and that i had my entire family there to be supportive and excited for us! plus, it was awesome to make the "we''re engaged!!" phone call to my parents and hear them scream "FINALLY!!!" into the phone! they''d been holding on the secret so long, i think they thought he''d changed his mind about proposing!!!!

 

[cushionlovelondon]

Hmmm,to be honest in my experience parents often let the cat out of the bag (this was the case with mine and my friends'' parents) but I don''t care: the fact that he asked my parents is so important to me and them - it''s a real sign of respect in my opinion and I wouldn''t have it any other way, personally. Good luck and congrats!