Am I over thinking this? Wedding guest wardrobe woes.

[mercoledi]

So we''re headed to a wedding in August in Chicago. I''m under the impression it''ll be a fairly posh affair, and for the first time ever I should be able to just dress myself out of my closet but...

I''m struggling.

I have at least 4 dresses that are appropriate, but it seems that each also has a fatal flaw- am I just over-reacting here?

Dress 1: J Crew silk chiffon Sophia in ''wreath''. This dress is light, beautiful, fits like a dream but it''s also ubiquitous. The last wedding I was at I was sat next to a woman in the same dress in brown. Luckily I was wearing Dress 2, but at a several hundred person wedding, it seems to me that there''s likely to be more than one Sophia in the crowd.

Dress 2: Silk Charmeuse kimono dress from BR. I grabbed this for $30 on consignment and has it tailored so it really looks great, it''s an incredible dark blue color. But, I feel weird wearing a kimono dress to a Chinese wedding.

Dress 3: Cotton embellished teal pin-tucked dress from Anthropologie. I saw this dress in a magazine and just had to have it. I eventually found on on ebay, had it tailored (see a theme here yet?) too, but, well, It just probably isn''t as flattering on me as it is on other people. Also the beading is dark red and gold on teal, which isn''t really summery.

Dress 4. DVF navajo print silk chiffon. Also on consignment, also needs to be taken up a bit but my tailor has retired! This dress is 3/4 length (on me, I''m wicked short) and low cut in both the front and back. The light silk chiffon is great for August, but the colors are black, cream and grey which seems a little dim for a wedding. I''ve worn it, but it needs either alteration or a whole lot of hollywood tape.

So what do you ladies think? Should I just wear dresses 1 or 2? I have pictures, but not of them on me. Am I totally being irrational?

 

[AmberGretchen]

Well I obviously would be the last person on earth to tell you (or anyone else) that they were over thinking their wedding guest attire - as evidenced by the multiple threads and the 3+ month search, and the fact that I think I spent more time trying on dresses for the wedding I''m going to this weekend than I did for my own wedding...

Anyway, on to your dilemma. I think it would help to see pics of the dresses, even if they are not on you - it might help to get a visual in terms of how appropriate the colors/styles/fabrics are.

Would it be very difficult/cumbersome/budget-breaking for you to look for something new? Alternatively, could you scope out some fun accessories to wear with one of the current options that would make it more different or appropriate? For example, if you could find some really standout things to wear with the Sophia, it might not matter as much if someone else had the same dress, especially if it was in a different color.

Anyway, just throwing some thoughts out - I think we need more information and also some visuals on the dresses.

 

[mercoledi]

Ok, so I was being a bit lazy before. Here are the dresses. The green is a bit brighter in person, Dress 2 is blue IRL, and not 2 sizes too big, dress 3 is more flattering and the straps come to a narrower point than in that picture and I threw in a dress 5. Dress 5 is maybe not fancy enough and I wore it to the wedding of our traveling companions (not that they remember what I wore to their wedding).

As to a new dress, I've kept an eye out but haven't found anything.

IRL pics will have to wait, I'm supposed to be working on my last paper before my dissertation and I really should get back to it...

Thanks AG, I knew you could empathize!

 

[mercoledi]

Irl-ish

 

[brazen_irish_hussy]

Personally, I love the green and the teal and both look perfect for what you described.

I think the dark blue might be too dark for summer and the other two look too casual to me.

Those are just my opinions, but I have similiar taste as you it seems and those would be my suggestions.

I don''t think you need a new dress.

 

[FrekeChild]

If I had to choose from these pics, I''d go with the Anthropologie dress. But I''m partial to blue shades, and the Kimono is beautiful, but I agree with BIH probably too dark for summer-but possibly too hot for Chicago in August as well.

I still want to see them on you though.

 

[jas]

Another vote for the teal -- I think it''s lovely! But I hear ya!

BTW, may I ask when the wedding is? I have an August wedding here, too, and I''m also concerned about what to wear. It would be so cool if we were at the same wedding.

And no, I don''t think that only 1 couple is getting married in the entire city of Chicago during the month of August.

 

[somethingshiny]

I vote for the teal one. I think it''s beautiful, appropriate and should hold up it''s shape in the Chicago humidity.

 

[mercoledi]

So it looks like the teal is the fan favorite? Would that it looked as good on me as it does on that dress form

Brazen, I agree that the dark blue is probably a little too warm for summer in Chicago. I''ve attached a fuzzy pic of me in the teal dress with the wrong shoes on, so maybe that''ll help.
Freke and SDL Thanks for weighing in. I''d love to get more wear out of the teal dress, and it matches my engagement shoes!
jas The wedding is at the end of the month in Deerfield. The bride is Chinese and I think the groom is half Portuguese, half something else. How cool would it be if it were the same one?
somethingshiny Does Chicago get humid? I grew up pretty far South so my humidity tolerance is pretty high, but it wreaks havoc with my hair.

So here''s me in the teal dress. I don''t have any good pictures from the event I wore it to. I have a few concerns:
1. I feel like it should fit up higher, I have broadish shoulders and a lot of space between my clavicles and the dress.
2. I''m pale, and so I have blue veining in my chest/shoulders. I''m never sure if this is something only I notice, or if it''s obvious (not that you can tell from this pic)
3. It''s still a little baggy in the waist, with all of the detailing it could only be brought so far in.

So here it is, teal dress, wrong shoes not-quite-the-right bra. I''ll try to get a better pic later. Please disregard the messy bedroom.

Thanks Ladies

 

[AmberGretchen]

I think that with alterations and the right accessories, you could totally do the teal dress. I''d do metallics for the accessory - kind of hard to tell which metallic from the pictures, but some strappy sandals, delicate jewelry, and a nice wrap would dress it up plenty even for a more formal event, IMO.

 

[urseberry]

I think the teal dress looks great on you! I agree that it looks like the top might be a little low - have you pinned the straps shorter to see if you want to get them taken up? I also suspect they did something to the dress on the form to make the skirt poofier. Looks like a crinoline or something.

 

[mercoledi]

Hi Amber-
I have some shoes that are very sentimental to me and are almost the same color. I supposed I could do bronze; the beading on the dress is gold, and gold doesn''t look great next to my skin.

I found some pictures of the only time I wore the dress, and ti doesn''t look that wonky. I think perhaps spending a year hanging in my closet has deformed it a little. I''ve pulled out and maybe lying flat the top will relax a tad.

urseberry-
Thanks! I''d rather not alter it again if I don''t have to, my tailor just retired and now I don''t know where to go! The straps are adjustable, so I did shorten them a little and I tried another bra. I think both those things helped. I actually had the skirt taken in already, when I got it it was super super poofy and I couldn''t cope. It does need some fluffing/steaming though.

Ok ladies, real life line up:

 

[urseberry]

Wow, nice lineup! I think all three look wonderful. The Sophia and the DVF are definitely more flattering than the Anthropologie dress, but the Anthropologie one still looks good. I personally would avoid the Sophia, since I'd hate if another woman at the same wedding was wearing it. I also don't think the DVF is too dark - the cream lightens it considerably. Don't be afraid to find another tailor. You'll need one eventually. Ask your friends or try Yelp.com for recommendations.

My choice would be the DVF. It's very chic and I think will fit right into a posh wedding in August in Chicago. I'd probably get it hemmed to just below the knee.

 

[Krissie]

My choice is the J Crew - it looks fantastic on your figure. I would pair some chunky gold jewelry with it, maybe a long necklace.

 

[krispi]

Date: 6/12/2008 1:39:31 PM
Author: Krissie
My choice is the J Crew - it looks fantastic on your figure. I would pair some chunky gold jewelry with it, maybe a long necklace.

Ditto! It''s gorgeous on you!

 

[mercoledi]

Thanks ladies! Those are probably the two most comfortable options too. I should get the DVF tweaked anyway, so I''ll have to start looking into that.

Any ideas on how to make the Sophia less Sophia-y? It was a limited color but popped back up recently. I have some brooches and I have a wide black beaded sash. And a huge ivory sash. For metallics I have some shiny silver heels and some satin pewter sky-highs with ankle straps. If I end up as one of many women in that dress, I at least want to be the one to wear it best

.

Would black and green be too dark? It''s a 5ish affair.

 

[mercoledi]

This set of dress clips would definitely change the look. Too old fashioned though?

 

[mercoledi]

Aw, thanks SDL!
That's sweet. When I was little I always wanted an 18 inch waist like Laura Ingles Wilder. And I did, somewhere around 12 years old

. I'm lucky that the women in my family gain weight kind of all over instead of in zones.

I think I'm going to tackle altering the DVF myself. It mostly has to come up about an inch in the shoulders, but the straps are one continuous panel from front to back, and the back is kind of open and drapey. It'll be a challenge, but I think I'm up for it.

I wore the DVF to a baptism and figured out later that the weird looks the priest kept giving me were probably because the stitches I had put in the dress to keep it closed had come completely undone in the car.

And somehow no DH or anyone else mentioned it... So yeah, it really needs to come up

.

 

[Rhea]

I think the JCrew dress looks best on you.

 

[somethingshiny]

Yes, it is humid in Chicago. If you''re doing alterations, keep that in consideration. If the humidity gets really high (which is a strong possibility in August), you may want the dress s bit roomy so it doesn''t cling to every shape under it.

I like the teal one and the other short one the best. Either way, I''d do metallic accessories.

 

[FrekeChild]

Ok. My honest opinions?

The Sophia dress doesn''t have that wow factor for me. I''m sure part of this is because it''s a solid color and has little detail, I think you could dress it up with some accessories, but I''m just not feeling it.

I like the Anthropologie dress. I like the detail on it, but I think that the skirt needs to be a bit poofier as well. Ironing would probably make a big difference.

Right now I''m leaning towards the DVF dress. It makes your waist look tiny, and it''s definitely not too dark.

Most importantly-which one is your favorite? Is there one that just makes you feel beautiful? Is there one that you feel extremely comfortable in?

And what about accessories? And can you take a closeup pic of the beading on the Anthro dress?

 

[monarch64]

I hear Freke on the "wow" factor with the JC Sophia, but honestly, it's a wedding, and you're a guest and will not need to be the center of attention if you get my drift. I think it is by far the most flattering to your figure (which is fab, btw), and I think it will be light enough to withstand the August humidity here. I always get obsessed with what to wear to events in other cities, so I totally understand where you're coming from. As a gal who's lived in Chicago (ok, the burbs, but we're downtown for things frequently), I can safely say that the Sophia is absolutely appropriate. I have to say that I vote "no" for the Anthropologie dress...way too casual, imo.

I would leave the sash on the Sophia as is, if you end up wearing it, and do a sparkly necklace and metallic strappy heel. I would love to see yg jewelry and a gold shoe! And no, that beautiful emerald green color is not too dark for a 5-ish wedding here.

ETA: while I like the DVF very much, and the material is well suited to the climate and timing of the event itself, the stripes bring a more casual feel to it that make me want to toss it in the "no" pile. Sorry if that sounds blunt, I am just being honest and having been through this many times myself (attended many a wedding here in the past) just trying to give you good advice.

 

[laine]

Date: 6/14/2008 2:56:28 AM
Author: monarch64
I hear Freke on the ''wow'' factor with the JC Sophia, but honestly, it''s a wedding, and you''re a guest and will not need to be the center of attention if you get my drift. I think it is by far the most flattering to your figure (which is fab, btw), and I think it will be light enough to withstand the August humidity here. I always get obsessed with what to wear to events in other cities, so I totally understand where you''re coming from. As a gal who''s lived in Chicago (ok, the burbs, but we''re downtown for things frequently), I can safely say that the Sophia is absolutely appropriate. I have to say that I vote ''no'' for the Anthropologie dress...way too casual, imo.


I would leave the sash on the Sophia as is, if you end up wearing it, and do a sparkly necklace and metallic strappy heel. I would love to see yg jewelry and a gold shoe! And no, that beautiful emerald green color is not too dark for a 5-ish wedding here.


ETA: while I like the DVF very much, and the material is well suited to the climate and timing of the event itself, the stripes bring a more casual feel to it that make me want to toss it in the ''no'' pile. Sorry if that sounds blunt, I am just being honest and having been through this many times myself (attended many a wedding here in the past) just trying to give you good advice.

I totally agree with everything Monarch said!