doodle
Brilliant_Rock
- Joined
- Feb 22, 2008
- Messages
- 1,810
be warned--this is a vent and most likely going to be a long one, but i''m putting it on here because venting to my friends would just make it get back to the person i''m venting about, so that defeats the purpose of getting it out of my system if it''d just make it worse, right?
a few nights ago, my FI and i invited over two couples, both of whom are very close friends. one of the girls, who i''ll call M, was ALL OVER her boy the whole night (they''ve been like this for three or four years--she actually straddled him on my couch and started grinding in the middle of everyone trying to watch a movie, and that''s not even remotely the most out there thing she did!). generally, i don''t say anything about it because i don''t feel like arguing with her--she''s one of my two best friends on earth, and most of the time, she''s a cool girl, but when she''s with him she just acts ridiculous. well, the next day, she came over, and she started making ugly comments about the other girl that was there (i''ll call her L), saying she thought it was disgusting and disrespectful that L was lounging on the couch with her legs open. Ordinarily, maybe she''d have a point, but A)i never even noticed L doing that, and B)if she had been, so what? she''s pregnant, and having a rough one at that. if she''d felt like she''d more comfortable propping her feet on my FI''s head, i would''ve told him to sit still! like i said, i generally don''t say anything about the way M acts, but her going on and on about L when she was so much worse that night just rubbed me the wrong way, so i told her, and this is a direct quote, "well, speaking of which, i thought you were a little over the line the other night, too". she immediately goes, "yeah, but WE''RE just kidding." i told her, "i understood that, but acting that way in front of other people makes them uncomfortable--we were trying to watch a movie, and every time you started doing that kind of stuff, people felt like they needed to look away, even though AWAY meant missing the movie because you guys were in everyone''s line of vision". she got PISSED, went off on me about how i call my FI pet names in front of her (the irony being that she calls him the same names, so she''s the only person i''ve EVER done that in front of). i said that i had no problem with her calling her bf pet names in front of me, but when you''re putting on a display of physical contact that should be reserved for private moments, it''s awkward for others. skipping the rest of the conversation because it was pretty much repeating myself over and over, she started crying and stormed out. by the way, she''s moving and had wanted me to help her pack, so before this argument, i had been sitting in my apartment for TWO HOURS waiting on her to get there so we could go to her place and i could help her pack her stuff. two and a half hours, then she just walks out the door with a chip on her shoulder.
throughout us arguing, i apologized several times once i realized she was upset, not for what i said but if the way that i had set it was hurtful or rude. she walked out in the middle of that.
this girl''s one of my best friends, but i know how she stews when she''s angry. we''ve only been in one other fight ever because she thought i told her bf something that i did not, and she didn''t speak to me for two weeks (for something that i never even did). i feel like i already apologized for possibly bringing up the subject in the wrong way and she walked out on it, and beyond that, i don''t think that i owe her an apology because she WAS out of line and being disrespectful to me, my FI, and our guests in our home. am i out of line on this one?
for the record, i know this is one of the most ridiculous arguments ever--i feel like i''ve flashbacked to high school! i suppose if it ever gets worked out, i''ll maybe even find it humorous, but right now i''m thinking that i have four months until my wedding, and my best friend won''t even speak to me.
a few nights ago, my FI and i invited over two couples, both of whom are very close friends. one of the girls, who i''ll call M, was ALL OVER her boy the whole night (they''ve been like this for three or four years--she actually straddled him on my couch and started grinding in the middle of everyone trying to watch a movie, and that''s not even remotely the most out there thing she did!). generally, i don''t say anything about it because i don''t feel like arguing with her--she''s one of my two best friends on earth, and most of the time, she''s a cool girl, but when she''s with him she just acts ridiculous. well, the next day, she came over, and she started making ugly comments about the other girl that was there (i''ll call her L), saying she thought it was disgusting and disrespectful that L was lounging on the couch with her legs open. Ordinarily, maybe she''d have a point, but A)i never even noticed L doing that, and B)if she had been, so what? she''s pregnant, and having a rough one at that. if she''d felt like she''d more comfortable propping her feet on my FI''s head, i would''ve told him to sit still! like i said, i generally don''t say anything about the way M acts, but her going on and on about L when she was so much worse that night just rubbed me the wrong way, so i told her, and this is a direct quote, "well, speaking of which, i thought you were a little over the line the other night, too". she immediately goes, "yeah, but WE''RE just kidding." i told her, "i understood that, but acting that way in front of other people makes them uncomfortable--we were trying to watch a movie, and every time you started doing that kind of stuff, people felt like they needed to look away, even though AWAY meant missing the movie because you guys were in everyone''s line of vision". she got PISSED, went off on me about how i call my FI pet names in front of her (the irony being that she calls him the same names, so she''s the only person i''ve EVER done that in front of). i said that i had no problem with her calling her bf pet names in front of me, but when you''re putting on a display of physical contact that should be reserved for private moments, it''s awkward for others. skipping the rest of the conversation because it was pretty much repeating myself over and over, she started crying and stormed out. by the way, she''s moving and had wanted me to help her pack, so before this argument, i had been sitting in my apartment for TWO HOURS waiting on her to get there so we could go to her place and i could help her pack her stuff. two and a half hours, then she just walks out the door with a chip on her shoulder.
throughout us arguing, i apologized several times once i realized she was upset, not for what i said but if the way that i had set it was hurtful or rude. she walked out in the middle of that.
this girl''s one of my best friends, but i know how she stews when she''s angry. we''ve only been in one other fight ever because she thought i told her bf something that i did not, and she didn''t speak to me for two weeks (for something that i never even did). i feel like i already apologized for possibly bringing up the subject in the wrong way and she walked out on it, and beyond that, i don''t think that i owe her an apology because she WAS out of line and being disrespectful to me, my FI, and our guests in our home. am i out of line on this one?
for the record, i know this is one of the most ridiculous arguments ever--i feel like i''ve flashbacked to high school! i suppose if it ever gets worked out, i''ll maybe even find it humorous, but right now i''m thinking that i have four months until my wedding, and my best friend won''t even speak to me.
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