Learning a harsh lesson/need advice (work related)

[fieryred33143]

I will try to keep the background brief.

I have worked in my dept for about 5 years now so I've seen some employees come and go.

We are one department with 3 different areas. When I first started, we had a Sr. Director and Director whose core values were people development. Every staff meeting was kicked off with achievements and recognitions in which they encouraged the team to recognize someone for their hard work. They encouraged us all to work together. We gave updates on what each person was working on and were all kept in the loop.

So, if I was working on a project but knew that someone from one of our other areas had some background in what I was doing, I would reach out to that person and get their input. Then later in the staff meeting, because it was the culture of our team, I would say "I would like to recognize John for his assistance in xyz procedures which lead to abc results."

When our Sr. Director moved on, another Sr. came in who wasn't really into the whole recognition but our Director pushed for it so she took it on as well. Then our Director was replaced and it was really up to the team to speak up and do the recognitions which we always did. Then half of the team, through time, was replaced. Eventually, we got a new Sr. Director.

Now the recognition is far and few in between. And it is so insincere. We get recognized for things like "thank you fiery for getting the team some coffee while you were out." Um...thanks? How about the 12 hours of overtime I put in this week to help an area I'm not part of?

Aside from not doing recognition anymore, we work in silos. I don't know what anyone is working on anymore. Everyone keeps their projects close to them and doesn't want to share. My coworker, that is in my area, was reprimanded by our Manager for asking another Manager for input on his project. Huh?? I thought this was one big team?? And he's constantly telling us not to mention the projects we're working on.

Needless to say, the culture has completely changed. I feel pressured, work hard, and have zero idea as to whether I'm doing a good job or not. The competition between the Managers is causing me severe stress. If I ask a coworker for their input, like I always used to do, I am made to feel like it is a poor reflection on me and not like I'm just using our resources wisely.

Now, I figure I have two options:

I can either b!tch and moan about all the changes and long for the way things used to be
OR
I can start acting like everyone else.

It is my nature to want to recognize people for a job well done, use my resources so that my projects are even better, and be a team player. The problem with this is that I'm getting left behind. I'm not getting Sr. management's attention because those taht are aggressive are being noticed more. Example: there was a special project, I did a piece of it, the person I worked with expected me to show our Sr. Director my piece, I didn't think that made much sense since it was only a small piece of the puzzle so I told him we'll present everything together. Well, he set up a separate meeting that he didn't invite me too and took credit for everything.

So....how do I switch my ways? I can't afford to not work and until things start getting better both at my job (no open positions) and in the market, I'm stuck here. But the more that I allow others to be aggressive and step all over me, the more I am pushed aside.

Any advice??

 

[iheartscience]

I think you answered your own question. It sounds like an unfortunate change, but if you're getting left behind because you're not conforming to the new culture, it's time to make a change and look out for yourself. Being fair and nice doesn't get you anywhere, so don't do it anymore. You don't have to be nasty, of course, but I wouldn't worry about recognizing anyone or trying to share credit.

 

[shihtzulover]

I think you answered your own question. It sounds like an unfortunate change, but if you're getting left behind because you're not conforming to the new culture, it's time to make a change and look out for yourself. Being fair and nice doesn't get you anywhere, so don't do it anymore. You don't have to be nasty, of course, but I wouldn't worry about recognizing anyone or trying to share credit.

it's sad, but I've found this to be true with most things in life. In the past, I was always the nice one with the thin skin. I cared way too much about others' feelings and making sure to be fair to everyone, even though I was usually the one being hurt. It seems that so many people will walk all over you if they think they can.

 

[Mara]

Fiery... I think it's hard to change who you are at the core in terms of how you work, how you feel comfortable, esp when it comes to being more aggressive.

You say you are getting left behind, but do you really want to get ahead in this type of environment? Especially if it means going against what you feel inside is the right way?

I definitely know what it is like to have an amazing work environ that changes over time and then you are wistfully thinking about the old days when things were better. But things will never change BACK...they can only change again. And you can only wait out the change, adapt or move on.

In this situation you laid out, knowing how stressed you are, and how HARD you work, my only two options would be 1) realize I am going to get left behind because I don't want to change and working harder is not really feasible or 2) find a new job in a better situation and environment. Changing to be more aggressive or follow what everyone else is doing would not be an option for me--it would go against my grain and I wouldn't feel comfortable with that. I would find a new environment rather than adapt in a negative manner.

Have you looked for a new job elsewhere? Not sure what the market is like for you. If you don't leave and you don't want to change, can you make peace with not 'getting ahead' in this type of environment? That is kind of what I am doing right now-- treading water. I am too lazy to make a change for elsewhere and unsure what I really want anyway... but know that I don't want to do the 'extra' it would take to get ahead right now.

 

[monarch64]

Fiery, is it possible for you to construct a better working plan that will demonstrate how you could lead the team as department head utilizing what you are learning from this experience? I see this as an opportunity for advancement for you. If you could take the most positive aspects of the former construct, combine them with what the new construct's more efficient ways of doing things are, and make them into your own ideal you might really have something to present to the CEO/COO/whomever is in charge? It takes someone like you who recognizes the downfalls and disconnects in these situations to bring about positive and profitable change. I think you have it in you. If I were a company owner I would hire the hell out of you. Good luck.

 

[perry]

Learning to survive our managers is tough. Fortunately, they tend to change frequently.

Other options:

Keep your chin up - do the best you can; and wait for the next director.

Look for a new job elsewhere (but unless the company has a long history of the type of work environment - beware of the same pattern).


Perry

 

[zoebartlett]

If I was in this position, I'd go to the Sr. Director and Director and tell them all of the positive things that came from working as a team and recognizing one another's efforts to reach a common goal (and I'd mention whatever specific goal that is). That should be a HUGE part of any work place. At the school I was at last year, we began every staff meeting with "celebrations." It was very similar to what you described: "I'd like to recognize [so and so] for helping me (or us) do xyz. Because of his/her help, we were able to...which benefitted the students by..." It wasn't that scripted but you know what I mean. People SHOULD be commended for their hard work, and it really bothers me when that doesn't happen or it isn't noticed. I'd definitely go to your boss and encourage that to happen again.
Basically, I'd fight for the culture and environment that was in place before. Be positive in your approach, meaning, don't complain to your boss about how things are done now, just advocate for a supportive culture.

Hope this helps!

 

[fieryred33143]

An update as of this morning: Our Director set up individual meetings with everyone. She used to do this quarterly but we haven’t had a 1 on 1 meeting with her in about a year. I’m going to take that opportunity to voice some of my concerns. I need to find a way to word it so that it doesn’t come across as complaining but instead as wanting the department to improve.

T2 and SL-thank you for your input. I think it was a harsh reality for me since I don’t come from an environment where we stomp on each other to get ahead. Our new team does. They all come from big firms where to get the partner’s attention, you had to crawl over each other. It’s the way those firms function. They’re highly intelligent people as a result but they’re also so focused on getting ahead that they forget about the team aspect.

Mara-thank you for understanding. I am very much like you in that I don’t like to change who I am in order to fit in with everyone else. As for finding a new job, I have been talking to other directors and managers within Finance about the possibility of rotating out. My mentor is on a Talent Review Committee and she confided in me that they have discussed my next steps. They’re all aware that I’m willing to move into another group. Unfortunately, there are no positions open anywhere at the time. She says that things will start opening up soon but I don’t know if soon means within the next few months or within a year.

I don’t know if I’m willing to leave my company. I love it here. It’s a great company and I really believe in the values of the company. Plus, it’s scary to think of moving to another company and not knowing whether that company will downsize or not.

Mon-thanks for your input. It’s interesting you mention developing a plan. I’ve been looking into some of my management books for team building exercises that will help us break the silos within the department. On Monday when I talk to the director, I’m going to pitch the idea to her. I think the biggest issue is that we somehow fostered an environment where the managers feel compelled to compete with one another even though we all work on completely different projects. And you know how it goes in work environments—sh!t rolls downhill.

Perry-thanks for the words of encouragement. I think maintaining a positive attitude is what I really need to work on in order to change my perspective on things.

Zoe-it does help, thanks! That’s exactly how we were and wasn’t it great to work in a place like that? We actually have recognition cards that were issued by the company. Whenever we wanted to recognize someone, we would put it on the card and read the card out loud in the meeting. I loved that!

 

[Mara]

Fiery I think voicing your thoughts and wording it in a positive manner to the Dir is a positive thing.

Question for you--a lot of times when new blood comes into the company, they view the 'old ways' as bad ways of doing things. I am in this situation now. A lot of old people have gone and new exec mgmt has made it clear they didn't like the old ways (even though the vibe was SO much better) and so I am hesitant about saying 'historically we...' because it might not be considered a GOOD THING even if it really was. Is that the same vibe in your company? If so-- I would be cautious about speaking up unless you knew you might put a target on your back.

And good for you for talking to other depts etc and seeing what your options are. In our company you have to get your VP's approval to move to another dept but people do it all the time, our company would rather typically keep someone internally than lose them externally.

There is also waiting it out as others mentioned. Some people at in my dept are doing just that. Because a lot of times things do change. But the thing you can't know is... is it for the better or worse? And do you want to wait to see? And how long do you wait? Anyway good luck lady!!! Bottom line is you need to be worked less!!!! I know that may not be an option though.

 

[fieryred33143]

Mara, re: your question

Our department was always highly respected because of our people development and the fact that we took the time to recognize each other. It was one of our leaders that came up with the monthly finance team member recognition and a committee was put together. A lot of other departments that did not have staff meetings started implementing them because of the positive results from our meetings.

On top of that, our team has always been viewed as the go to team when there is a new position open. We have only had one team member in the past leave the company. All others are still here but they are eitehr sr. analysts, managers, or sr. managers in other areas of the company.

I get the vibe that because of all of this, the sr management doesn't want to let go of that past because it's what puts us ahead of the other departments BUT because they don't really buy into the message, it is very insincere.

I gave the example above about the coffee recognition which did happen at our staff meeting. I have also heard recognition like "thanks for coming in to the office even though you have a headache" or "this weekend we went to play golf and man this guy was awesome." Those are all nice things to say but they're not work related so it comes across as insincere.

The lack of recognition does bother me but it's not really the source of the stress. That's more of a nice to have. The stressful piece is around working in silos and the competition between managers.

 

[iheartscience]

I think bringing it up at your meeting is a great idea and I hope it helps.

I've actually been in a similar situation, and trying to get everyone to conform to the older, truly better way of doing things didn't work out AT ALL. In fact, I think it probably reflected a little negatively on me because it seemed like I wasn't willing to go with the flow at all. I finally just let it go, and although I think the company suffered because of the changes and the new culture, I was a lot happier.

I don't think you have to turn into a nasty backstabber, but self-promotion never hurt anyone. And if your coworkers aren't willing to help you out or recognize your contributions when you help them, it's a waste of your time and effort.

 

[movie zombie]

you don't have to be agressive in the work place but you must be ASSERTIVE. there is a big difference between the two.

you were encouraged to be assertive and present your piece of a project and when you didn't, someone took all the credit. call it a learning lesson.

read up on ASSERTIVE behavior in the work place. there are a lot of books and workshops on that topic. perhaps learning that it is ok to be assertive will help you to stand out to your employers.

short of finding another job, it sounds like unless you learn to adapt and promote yourself, you'll not advance. going against your nature is hard so finding a way to make this job situation ok for yourself is paramount. as an assertive woman you can still be a team player and give recognition to your co-workers......and to yourself.

MoZo

 

[partgypsy]

I was working in a situation that was more isolative, and am now moving into a situation that is more collaborative, and I am so much more happier (and productive). Coworkers can be such a great resource, so people sharing information, ideas, ways of doing things can make everyone more productive prevent re-inventing the wheel. So I feel bad that it looks like you are moving from a place which recognized that value to one that doesn't. I would talk to your boss, explain and give examples why the department was more productive and retained employees due to those proccesses.
But, it may not change things. If everyone is being cut-throat and tooting their horn, you don't have to be a jerk, but yes, self-promotion is a part of every job. You need to let your supervisors know what you are working on, what you accomplished, what you are planning to do to make things better. I'm sure you ARE doing a good job, you just have to let your supervisors know. I HATE the whole back-stabbing culture that some places have, and it is really counter-productive, but hey it sounds like you may be stuck with that (until the next supervisor comes around).

 

[zipzapgirl]

I was just thinking about a management class I just took and one of the areas we studied was different types of power. Several types of power come from being the "boss", but some of the most important ones are access and control of information and resources. Keeping control of these can increase your power base because you know things before others or that they never know and you can determine when others find out information. In many cases, holding on to information will be counterproductive to the department, but a self-conscious, unsure manager might prefer to hold onto info because they are insecure.

It seems that your new managers prefer to receive information from subordinates and then share it with other staff as they see fit.
Building, maintaining and communicating within a team can be very good for certain projects and very rewarding when the team clicks, but it is also very expensive in terms of time and effort (meetings, team events, meetings, meetings...) This is just speculation on my part, but is it possible that the managers see the new structure as more efficient? Maybe they feel like this keeps it from being distracting from other staff who don't need to know or that it makes things more efficient, or that it keeps them in charge, but I think they have effectively killed the team. Now you are just "people who work in the same department".

In my opinion, you will need to adapt in order to be successful in this department. I don't think that you'll be successful in trying to rebuild the team without the right management support and so I don't think that that will be helpful to bring up as a discussion topic in the meeting with the manager. My focus would be to really work on communicating with the managers and keeping them informed on how my projects were going--the access to the department's resources and team assistance is going through them--and focus the meeting on what's been going well in your area and ask where you can look for development.

Good luck!

 

[february2003bride]

This post may not help in any way, but I wanted to let you know that I sympathize with you. My DH just left his old company and it was exactly how you described. It became such a toxic environment it really affected DH, although we didn't realize the extent until DH left on Friday and started a new position with a new company this past Monday. My DH is a different person. He joined a company that is a start up, is all about team building, utilizing its employees and appreciating their involvement. DH is actually having FUN. He's sleeping better, and even though the commute is longer, enjoys going to work now.

I know its easier said than done but if you don't work well in an environment that your company has changed into, it may be in your best interest to start job searching.

If you want to stay or have to stay at your current company, can you start laying the groundwork for you to take on a Director/Sr. Director role and bring back that team building that was so successful?