Been batting around an idea for a while...

[ame]

Ame, I think you're a bit insane, but I'm insane too and I can't allow you to buy crappy jewels...
In an old thread you said you could bear flaws if they were on an antique ring...
...what about this?
http://diamondbistro.com/category/201/Bands/listings/28700/Vintage-Platinum-Baguette-and-Single-Cut-Band.html

Other PSers are really skillful at finding gorgeous antique rings at decent prices...please Ame, let them help you!!!

Don't care for that item, honestly.

And I could, in an antique, or in a ring made to look flawed.

 

[lyra]

I'm kind of surprised at some of the strongly worded replies in this thread. It's just jewelry! If Ame wants to sell everything, that's her prerogative. We may be more jewelry-minded on this site, but in real life most people don't put much time into thinking about this stuff AT ALL. I say sell everything if you think that will simplify your life. Rock a one pointer if that's less stressful. Seriously, if something is bugging you, change it. You might not be happier, but life will go on and you can re-evalute later on. It's not like it's hard to find other diamonds--you just need to be able to pay for them.

 

[purplesilk]

Don't care for that item, honestly.

De gustibus non disputandum est.

 

[marym]

Ame, I can totally understand why you would be worried about your rings, especially since you haven't had any luck with professionals fixing them correctly. My platinum bezel needs to be repaired, but I am scared not only to put the ring in the mail back to the vendor, but worried that they won't fix it correctly. So I just wear it with the dent in the bezel. But since I have a bezel I do not, however worry about prongs breaking or the safety of the diamond. Maybe a sturdier setting, like a bezel or semi bezel so you don't have to worry about the prongs? I think a Sholdt semi bezel would look amazing with the Tiffany channel set band!

I think that part of this issue is that since you have no faith (rightfully so) that anyone can repair your rings properly if they do need to be repaired. Rings like yours are a huge financial investment that are worn on the hand and subject to damage/loss so I think your fears are justified. I just think that if it is bothering you so much on a daily basis, maybe you should put them away or sell them eventually. It really isn't worth it if they are making you that unhappy.

I also want to say that I actually really like those rings from Etsy. I don't think they look cheap or crappy at all. I think that was a really harsh statement. They may not be everyone's personal taste, but I don't understand why someone would bash them like that when you obviously posted them because you like them. I think they are very pretty and different, and I like them for the same reasons as you do. They are dainty and kind of minimalist/simple. I am actually thinking about ordering them in rose gold for a RHR! Anyway, it might be worth it for your sanity's sake to get those rings and lock up the other set. Then see how you feel on down the road and then maybe consider selling the main set later on. I do think Maisie is right about being really sure about selling though.

I hope you can get some resolution to all of this. I know what it's like to be stuck in a pattern of obsessing about certain things. Taking the rings out of the equation for a while might be just what you need.

 

[GemFever]

I agree with marym. I'd lock up the rings in a safety deposit box for a few years. I don't see what the big deal is with not wearing them... you could pull them out if you miss them, or if you go to a fancy event. I personally have paranoia about theft (but not enough to actually insure my stones, stupidly), and sometimes I get so tired of worrying about it I want to lock up all my valuables, just to get some rest. But I still love my stones and I want to own them, I want to have them. I don't see any wrong with owning them but keeping them safe for a while.

 

[TravelingGal]

I'm kind of surprised at some of the strongly worded replies in this thread. It's just jewelry! If Ame wants to sell everything, that's her prerogative. We may be more jewelry-minded on this site, but in real life most people don't put much time into thinking about this stuff AT ALL. I say sell everything if you think that will simplify your life. Rock a one pointer if that's less stressful. Seriously, if something is bugging you, change it. You might not be happier, but life will go on and you can re-evalute later on. It's not like it's hard to find other diamonds--you just need to be able to pay for them.

However in Ame's case it IS hard to find them, and even harder to set them.

I've been reading PS for a loooong time now...and in those years, things haven't changed all that much for Ame and her jewelry. As she mentioned, I don't think this is something that can easily fixed.

 

[Laila619]

I took a closer look at the etsy ring, and it's razor thin! Dainty is one thing, but this is a whole different animal. I don't think that would be durable or practical at all. A 1mm platinum ring would very likely go out of round or bend.

 

[marym]

I took a closer look at the etsy ring, and it's razor thin! Dainty is one thing, but this is a whole different animal. I don't think that would be durable or practical at all. A 1mm platinum ring would very likely go out of round or bend.

She has said several times that the whole point of this set is that she wouldn't be as worried about it if something should happen to it because it is less expensive. It would just be something pretty for her to wear that she knows wasn't a huge financial investment. She also LIKES them people!! Isn't that worth anything? There are plenty of people on this site that have rings that aren't necessarily practical, like intricate pave, etc but nobody tells them not to have those kinds of rings. For her particular issues, I think a set like this makes sense.

 

[TravelingGal]

I took a closer look at the etsy ring, and it's razor thin! Dainty is one thing, but this is a whole different animal. I don't think that would be durable or practical at all. A 1mm platinum ring would very likely go out of round or bend.

She has said several times that the whole point of this set is that she wouldn't be as worried about it if something should happen to it because it is less expensive. It would just be something pretty for her to wear that she knows wasn't a huge financial investment. She also LIKES them people!! Isn't that worth anything? There are plenty of people on this site that have rings that aren't necessarily practical, like intricate pave, etc but nobody tells them not to have those kinds of rings. For her particular issues, I think a set like this makes sense.

marym, are you aware of Ame's issues when it comes to jewelry? She just said she would baby a SIM MORE because it's not has hard as a diamond, vs not caring because it's cheaper than a diamond. If this jewelry warps and bends easily, it's possible it will cause her more angst.

 

[marym]

Yes, TGal, I have read the other threads. I just think she needs to get out of this pattern of worrying about her wedding set, and she has stated that she won't be as worried about a less expensive set. I think there is too much negativity attached to her wedding set for her to be able to enjoy it. Plus she likes this one and knows it's not a super fancy expensive set, so maybe she should try it and see if it helps her? Why can't we be supportive of her issues instead of bashing what she likes?? FWIW, I have a heart of water lotus ring (about 1mm wide) that I frequently wear, and it has not gotten bent or gone out of round. I say go for it Ame!

 

[TravelingGal]

Yes, TGal, I have read the other threads. I just think she needs to get out of this pattern of worrying about her wedding set, and she has stated that she won't be as worried about a less expensive set. I think there is too much negativity attached to her wedding set for her to be able to enjoy it. Plus she likes this one and knows it's not a super fancy expensive set, so maybe she should try it and see if it helps her? Why can't we be supportive of her issues instead of bashing what she likes?? FWIW, I have a heart of water lotus ring (about 1mm wide) that I frequently wear, and it has not gotten bent or gone out of round. I say go for it Ame!

How many years have you gone back? She couldn't wear them YEARS ago before all this craziness happened. Way before things started going wrong.

 

[marym]

I don't really think I need to go back through years of threads to give my opinion on these particular rings that she posted about. I've read her more recent threads on the problems with her wedding set, and I am just giving my opinion, based on why she said she worries about wearing her current wedding set. I don't see the harm in her trying this Etsy set to wear everyday and maybe keep her main set locked up unless/until she feels she can enjoy it without worrying. I too can obsess about work, etc and I know that can be a hard pattern to break sometimes, and maybe she just needs to start over with something that doesn't have so much $$/disappointment associated with it. It's worth a try, anyway.

 

[marym]

Also, maybe she doesn't WANT to wear a sim. She LIKES this set, not the other ones suggested. What is wrong with that????

 

[ame]

I think MaryM has just pilfered all of the responses in my head and posted them on my brain's behalf.

 

[TravelingGal]

I don't really think I need to go back through years of threads to give my opinion on these particular rings that she posted about. I've read her more recent threads on the problems with her wedding set, and I am just giving my opinion, based on why she said she worries about wearing her current wedding set. I don't see the harm in her trying this Etsy set to wear everyday and maybe keep her main set locked up unless/until she feels she can enjoy it without worrying. I too can obsess about work, etc and I know that can be a hard pattern to break sometimes, and maybe she just needs to start over with something that doesn't have so much $$/disappointment associated with it. It's worth a try, anyway.

No, you don't. But for those of us who DO know years of history when it comes to Ame and jewelry are certainly within reason to use THAT knowledge to comment on THESE rings in relation to how she deals with jewelry in general.

 

[TravelingGal]

ame, if you want to buy a cheap set, go for it. But from what I know, just because you think you are going to do something, doesn't mean it will pan out that way. You were supposed to give up on jewelry after the MF mess, but you then went on a hunt for the Tiffany ring. Which is fine, don't get me wrong, but you can't seem to give it a rest when it comes to jewelry and then you just have more issues!

 

[Laila619]

I took a closer look at the etsy ring, and it's razor thin! Dainty is one thing, but this is a whole different animal. I don't think that would be durable or practical at all. A 1mm platinum ring would very likely go out of round or bend.

She has said several times that the whole point of this set is that she wouldn't be as worried about it if something should happen to it because it is less expensive. It would just be something pretty for her to wear that she knows wasn't a huge financial investment. She also LIKES them people!! Isn't that worth anything? There are plenty of people on this site that have rings that aren't necessarily practical, like intricate pave, etc but nobody tells them not to have those kinds of rings. For her particular issues, I think a set like this makes sense.

Yes, they do. When something is too thin, plenty of posters will advise someone that the setting is likely not safe.

 

[marym]

TGal, I don't understand why you even bother replying to her thread when you obviously have nothing positive to contribute and just seem to want to take this as an opportunity to subtlety make her out to be mentally unstable. You are not the only one who is doing this, either. I for one appreciate her candor about her issues. I don't think some people on here realize the effect your written words can have on someone who is struggling with something. It's all fine and good to ooh and ahh over some expensive purchase, but when she is obviously wrestling with an issue (however trivial you think it may be) and people speak about her in a very condescending tone as if she isn't reading it.... I just think that's hurtful. Or to the poster who advised her to take meds. ??? Are you a medical professional? I know I will get flamed for saying these things, but I just feel bad for Ame. She is brave to talk about her issues, and I don't think it's fair for some of you to judge her so harshly.

 

[marym]

I took a closer look at the etsy ring, and it's razor thin! Dainty is one thing, but this is a whole different animal. I don't think that would be durable or practical at all. A 1mm platinum ring would very likely go out of round or bend.

She has said several times that the whole point of this set is that she wouldn't be as worried about it if something should happen to it because it is less expensive. It would just be something pretty for her to wear that she knows wasn't a huge financial investment. She also LIKES them people!! Isn't that worth anything? There are plenty of people on this site that have rings that aren't necessarily practical, like intricate pave, etc but nobody tells them not to have those kinds of rings. For her particular issues, I think a set like this makes sense.

Yes, they do. When something is too thin, plenty of posters will advise someone that the setting is likely not safe.

Well, I think you are missing the point. She just wants a cheaper nice set to wear everyday. Unless she works on an assembly line with her hands all the time, I don't think it is a big deal.

 

[TravelingGal]

TGal, I don't understand why you even bother replying to her thread when you obviously have nothing positive to contribute and just seem to want to take this as an opportunity to subtlety make her out to be mentally unstable. You are not the only one who is doing this, either. I for one appreciate her candor about her issues. I don't think some people on here realize the effect your written words can have on someone who is struggling with something. It's all fine and good to ooh and ahh over some expensive purchase, but when she is obviously wrestling with an issue (however trivial you think it may be) and people speak about her in a very condescending tone as if she isn't reading it.... I just think that's hurtful. Or to the poster who advised her to take meds. ??? Are you a medical professional? I know I will get flamed for saying these things, but I just feel bad for Ame. She is brave to talk about her issues, and I don't think it's fair for some of you to judge her so harshly.

Um, I don't think Ame is mentally unstable. Not at all. I think she has OCD issues when it comes to her ring, which she MORE than has admitted to. I've told her before she seems perfectly normal and insightful otherwise, so maybe it's YOU that is causing the drama?

We're not JUDGING her. We know what she is ADMITTEDLY like when it comes to her rings. She asked for an opinion on the rings, and we gave it to her based on her history, on whether it makes sense to do.

Please, don't make up motives when there are none.

 

[TravelingGal]

And DUH, I don't think it's trivial. I think it's a pretty big issue (per her posts), which is why I am saying that a pair of cheap rings is unlikely going to solve it.

 

[marym]

TGal, I don't understand why you even bother replying to her thread when you obviously have nothing positive to contribute and just seem to want to take this as an opportunity to subtlety make her out to be mentally unstable. You are not the only one who is doing this, either. I for one appreciate her candor about her issues. I don't think some people on here realize the effect your written words can have on someone who is struggling with something. It's all fine and good to ooh and ahh over some expensive purchase, but when she is obviously wrestling with an issue (however trivial you think it may be) and people speak about her in a very condescending tone as if she isn't reading it.... I just think that's hurtful. Or to the poster who advised her to take meds. ??? Are you a medical professional? I know I will get flamed for saying these things, but I just feel bad for Ame. She is brave to talk about her issues, and I don't think it's fair for some of you to judge her so harshly.

Um, I don't think Ame is mentally unstable. Not at all. I think she has OCD issues when it comes to her ring, which she MORE than has admitted to. I've told her before she seems perfectly normal and insightful otherwise, so maybe it's YOU that is causing the drama?

We're not JUDGING her. We know what she is ADMITTEDLY like when it comes to her rings. She asked for an opinion on the rings, and we gave it to her based on her history, on whether it makes sense to do.

Please, don't make up motives when there are none.

I'm sorry- I don't buy it Tgal. You may throw some seemingly nice comments in here and there, but you and several others have jumped on your high horse as usual. You know what I mean, and you just don't like to be called out on it. I like so many aspects of PS, but this is definitely not one of them.

 

[TravelingGal]

TGal, I don't understand why you even bother replying to her thread when you obviously have nothing positive to contribute and just seem to want to take this as an opportunity to subtlety make her out to be mentally unstable. You are not the only one who is doing this, either. I for one appreciate her candor about her issues. I don't think some people on here realize the effect your written words can have on someone who is struggling with something. It's all fine and good to ooh and ahh over some expensive purchase, but when she is obviously wrestling with an issue (however trivial you think it may be) and people speak about her in a very condescending tone as if she isn't reading it.... I just think that's hurtful. Or to the poster who advised her to take meds. ??? Are you a medical professional? I know I will get flamed for saying these things, but I just feel bad for Ame. She is brave to talk about her issues, and I don't think it's fair for some of you to judge her so harshly.

Um, I don't think Ame is mentally unstable. Not at all. I think she has OCD issues when it comes to her ring, which she MORE than has admitted to. I've told her before she seems perfectly normal and insightful otherwise, so maybe it's YOU that is causing the drama?

We're not JUDGING her. We know what she is ADMITTEDLY like when it comes to her rings. She asked for an opinion on the rings, and we gave it to her based on her history, on whether it makes sense to do.

Please, don't make up motives when there are none.

I'm sorry- I don't buy it Tgal. You may throw some seemingly nice comments in here and there, but you and several others have jumped on your high horse as usual. You know what I mean, and you just don't like to be called out on it. I like so many aspects of PS, but this is definitely not one of them.

Then, I'm sorry you feel that way. There is no high horse here. There only a woman who had admitted issues with her jewelry, and those of us who would like to see her enjoy jewelry (any of it.)

If you knew me at all, you'd know that I call a spade a spade, and I am always one to appreciate one's perception vs intention and apologize.

 

[lyra]

Well gee. Ame is an adult. She can and should do whatever the heck she wants. There is NOTHING wrong with trying a different route. There is NOTHING wrong with selling your diamond(s). Yes they are replaceable. Ame, do whatever you feel like doing. If it doesn't work out, move on to the next thing. You have to try things to know if they'll work or not, especially if you have issues.

 

[decodelighted]

I think MaryM has just pilfered all of the responses in my head and posted them on my brain's behalf.

Hee! Someone who hasn't spent six years riding this ride has finally come along. Buckle up, Marym!

 

[iheartscience]

What exactly would be wrong, in your estimation, with my interaction with others?

Taken them, didn't help, gained a significant amount of weight from them. Not willing to tolerate side effects of the other medical options, still trying in vain to lose any of this weight.

As for spending the money, it wouldn't be additional money on top of what I own, something if not all, would be sold to cover this cost. And as for a vendor I would trust, at this stage...probably not. The majority of setters and benchies don't work at the magnification I would require and are unwilling to change their work methods to satisfy my requirements.

I think it's fascinating that everyone thinks that my feelings about this stuff, shared only on jewelry related fora and with a few very specific people in my real daily life, requires serious medical attention. I don't go telling random f'ing people this stuff in daily life.

Perhaps that fact should get you to reconsider your anti-therapy stance, though. On PS we're all fairly crazy about jewelry, but not a single one of the posters here take it to your extremes. If you want to actually enjoy your jewelry, therapy seems to be your only option. Otherwise, just sell it all and be done with it.

As for the set you posted, it's super thin, and seeing as how you baby even a sim, you would probably baby this even more.

 

[TravelingGal]

What exactly would be wrong, in your estimation, with my interaction with others?

Taken them, didn't help, gained a significant amount of weight from them. Not willing to tolerate side effects of the other medical options, still trying in vain to lose any of this weight.

As for spending the money, it wouldn't be additional money on top of what I own, something if not all, would be sold to cover this cost. And as for a vendor I would trust, at this stage...probably not. The majority of setters and benchies don't work at the magnification I would require and are unwilling to change their work methods to satisfy my requirements.

I think it's fascinating that everyone thinks that my feelings about this stuff, shared only on jewelry related fora and with a few very specific people in my real daily life, requires serious medical attention. I don't go telling random f'ing people this stuff in daily life.

Perhaps that fact should get you to reconsider your anti-therapy stance, though. On PS we're all fairly crazy about jewelry, but not a single one of the posters here take it to your extremes. If you want to actually enjoy your jewelry, therapy seems to be your only option. Otherwise, just sell it all and be done with it.

As for the set you posted, it's super thin, and seeing as how you baby even a sim, you would probably baby this even more.[/quote]

Not to mention Ame, you've admitted on this thread that you'd wear this set about as much as you'd wear the other one.

Your fake EC....is that in a cheaper silver type setting? How do you find you are when you wear that set? Are you less afraid at ALL of banging it? And when you do, is it easier to brush off?

 

[ame]

Not really. Im less concerned about the area on the bottom of my finger (the plain silver) but not the top, bec if it scratches it calls attention to the fact that it's fake. I don't wear it much at all, unless I go to that one place and I actually WANT service.

Therapy is part of the problem, frankly. It made this issue WAY WAY WAY worse. Just like it made everything else I have issues with way worse.

I cannot say either way if I would literally be less concerned with that set vs this set. I don't know. I don't have the other set, only this one.

Anyway...thanks for all the input, and the support.

 

[stargurl78]

As for spending the money, it wouldn't be additional money on top of what I own, something if not all, would be sold to cover this cost. And as for a vendor I would trust, at this stage...probably not. The majority of setters and benchies don't work at the magnification I would require and are unwilling to change their work methods to satisfy my requirements.

Well I think if I were you, I would sell the solitaire since it you aren't wearing it and your feelings towards it aren't exactly positive. So why not just wear the Tiffany band and be done. You could stack it with some plain bands if you feel like switching it up. You seem happy with the Tiffany band and at least the plain bands don't have any stones to worry about. Sometimes I wear my Facets band with two 1.5mm white gold bands like this:



Anyways, that's just my thought. I don't think buying that new set will help because you may be just as paranoid about damaging that set, since it does seem flimsy...

Best of luck to you in figuring all of this out!

 

[purplesilk]

Of course Ame can do what ever she wants, but since she asked honest opinions... here we are with all our different thoughts...as Kenny would say: "People vary!"
By the way I totally agree with TravelingGal.