World''s oldest new mom dies, leaving behind twin toddlers

[Beacon]

While I don't think it is a great idea to become pregnant and give birth at such an advanced age, I don't think this lady did such a selfish thing.

My own parents did not live long and they weren't the greatest parents. My brother, sister and me were on our own from an early age. But I am so grateful to them as without them I would not have been given life. I never felt they owed me anything more than that and never had hard feelings towards them. Each of us siblilings has gone on to create wonderful lives for ourselves and we are so lucky and thankful.

Children are very resilient and if these two young girls can find a family to raise them, I suspect they will be ok. It is sad the mother is dead. It is sad the kids do not have a biological parent. But the kids have something that without this lady's choice, odd as it might have been, they would never have: a chance at life, the greatest gift of all.

 

[KimberlyH]

Date: 7/16/2009 1:16:33 AM
Author: Laila619

Date: 7/15/2009 4:58:52 PM
Author: zhuzhu
I am sorry for their loss.

I think we should be careful judging who ''should'' become biological mothers and who ''shouldn''t''. Should 25-30 years old with family history of cancer not be allowed to have children? Should young people in wheel chairs or have chronic disease like Rheumatoid Arthritis or obesity not he allowed to have children? We know they are also at increased risk of mortality and morbidity, no?

My point is, it is pretty sad that she died and left 2 little ones behind already. Pointing fingers at her motherhood decision is not necessarily going to help her family.

Well said.

Let''s just say there are plenty of young mothers who aren''t fit to raise kids. No one judges them.

Some women aren''t lucky enough to meet a man they love and get married and raise a family while they are still fertile.

Ah, but people do judge them, all of the time. I''ll admit I do, as do most of my friends and family. There may not be a thread about it on PS -- probably because it''s much more common than a 66 year old giving birth and be and this is a very polite forum where certain judgements are not acceptable -- but I garuantee you somewhere out there today quite a few more than one woman is being judged unfit to raise her children either by the people who surround her or a court system who is going to remove them from her care.

You are correct some women don''t meet the right man to have a family with during their childbearing years, but they could make the choice to reproduce through IVF then, or they could opt to adopt. There''s a reason there is a cut off point (55 years old) set in place by the medical community, it''s so things like this don''t happen.

 

[zhuzhu]

Don''t get me wrong. I do not have negative opinion of those who think of her as selfish, as those individuals are primarily concerned about the future of her orphan sons. I just think there are many other wonderful aspects of this woman''s life that one should not discount at the time of her passing.

My ancestors have always taught us the tale that "there are ears among the dead, constantly listening in on the livings to communicate back to the after world". I believe the moral of the tale is that there is a time to be specially kind, to exercise your compassion. I believe that time is right now, for that family which just lost a beloved mother/friend/sibling.

 

[KimberlyH]

Date: 7/16/2009 2:56:30 PM
Author: zhuzhu
Don''t get me wrong. I do not have negative opinion of those who think of her as selfish, as those individuals are primarily concerned about the future of her orphan sons. I just think there are many other wonderful aspects of this woman''s life that one should not discount at the time of her passing.

My ancestors have always taught us the tale that ''there are ears among the dead, constantly listening in on the livings to communicate back to the after world''. I believe the moral of the tale is that there is a time to be specially kind, to exercise your compassion. I believe that time is right now, for that family which just lost a beloved mother/friend/sibling.

Zhu, it''s reasonable of you to feel this way; it is equally as reasonable for others to feel it is acceptable to comment on her choices, dead or alive. Neither is right nor wrong, just a difference of opinion.

 

[Black Jade]

Once kids and born, they are born and you wish the best for them.

And kids get put into all kinds of situations that are not optimum for them, just because life is life. Parents are careless people; parents are good, but they die; parents get divorced--all kinds of things happen. And you hope and pray the best for the kids. But I do think there are issues with people PLANNING on non-optimum situations on purpose and other people (doctors) helping them just for the money.

If I were a doctor that did IVF, I would not help a single woman to have a child without a husband, regardless of her age. Not only is it very important for children to have a mother and a father if at all possible (I realize sometimes its not and I believe God will give grace to help single parents who can''t do any different,for whatever reason), but having only the mother, something could happen to her at any age, and then you get this situation. I wouldn''t want to be complicit in it, I really wouldn''t.

A child is not a kind of toy or accessory that you get to a certain age or point in life and decide you have a ''right'' to. Society was very harsh, even within my memory and I''m not that old, towards women who got pregnant out of wedlock and very harsh towards their resulting children, who got labelled and often suffered a good deal, though innocent. And that was wrong. However, we now a situation in which people very casually decide to have children, whether they are a teenager who doesn''t feel loved and isn''t watched enough (or maybe IS watched, but is clever) or a 45 year old Hollywood actress who can pay for IVF to bring a child into a relationship with her third husband, or not-husband-at-all who is here today and gone tomorrow. This also is problem and kids are suffering maybe as much or more than the illegitimate did in former days. This lady is just an extreme case in a situation that has gone very wrong, and where there is no thought for the kids'' welfare, but just for the adults'' rights and desires. As is the octomom. These exteme cases make the news and everyone gets veyr sefl-righteous about them, but there''s something deeper that is truly wrong.

I don''t have any answers to it, but I think some deep thinking needs to be done and some kind of regulation of doctors who have no sense. I know that there have been countries where they have forbidden things like selling your sperm for money (you''re allowed to donate but not sell). Regulation can be abused, of course, but that''s not a reason to have no regulation.

I haven''t thought this through in great detail--just some thoughts off the top of my head.

I wish the best for those kids, of course.

 

[crown1]

Date: 7/15/2009 5:13:25 PM
Author: decodelighted
I''m sorry for the kids & her family ... but I can''t help but think that what she did was incredibly selfish and short-sighted and possibly insane. Read between the lines of this story: single woman in her late sixties who has lived with her mother her entire life decided to sell the mother''s house after she dies in order to undergo fertility treatments? Uh boy.


Someone hide this idea from Susan Boyle! It doesn''t have a happy ending!

thanks for saying that. i tend to agree with you. i think we all judge everyday. to me, that just translates to forming an opinion of something. i have yet to meet someone who does not judge from time to time. now using your opinion or judgment to cause trouble for others, that is another thing. the woman is dead and no words are going to hurt her but someone might see the folly of this and think twice before doing it.