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Who did you take dress shopping?

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bobbin

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I am thinking about who I am going to take dress shopping with me. I have never been the kind of girl that likes to go shopping with my friends. I always feel pressured to keep moving on and I very rarely try things on. I also like to be able to take the time to determine what I like without others opinions in the first instance and then ask for opinions later if I need them. Otherwise I can sometimes be pressured into buying something I don''t like, or not buying something I like.

As a result of that I am quite nervous to go dress shopping. Is it important to have someone with you - for getting in and out of the dress for example?

So please help me out by telling me who you went dress shopping with, why you chose them, and how it went!
 

shertz1981

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For me, I took (and tomorrow, am taking) both my parents.

I also wanted to invite my FMIL, but she''s in Vietnam right now, plus my mother wanted "mommy/daughter" time (my dad doesn''t count apparently!)
 

elrohwen

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I went with one good friend from work, because the place was right down the street from the office. The purpose was mostly to look for bridesmaid dresses, but they did have a few bridal dresses that I tried on. Then I went back with mom, MIL, and SIL to look at the bridesmaid dresses again, but I did try on the bridal dresses for them. I also went to David''s Bridal with my mom.

When I actually went to POB to try on the dress I loved, I just took DH. My mom lives far away, and besides, her taste is so different than mine that she''s not helpful. I would''ve liked to go with MOH, but she lives across the country.
 

emeraldlover1

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I looked at a lot of dresses online and was fairly confident that I knew what would look good on me. So....I went by myself and bought the second dress that I tried on. I never looked back.
 

hawaiianorangetree

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Hi Bobbin!
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I went a few times to a couple of places on my own. You don''t need anyone with you to try on the dresses as the shop assistant helps you get them on and off.

When i found a dress i liked i took a good friend from work as the shop was just up the road from where we work and she was great.

I found that i didn''t like the pressure of having to say whether or not i liked the dresses i was trying on (the shop assistant said they were all beautiful when clearly they weren''t) so we had a secret system going.. i would give her a sign that i didn''t like it and she would tell the sales assistant it was no good!

If you feel pressured with other people there then there is nothing stopping you going on your own and you can always take someone back for your second, third and fourth try on when you find something you like!
 

laughwithme

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The first shopping trip, I took only my best friend/MOH. We have similar styles, and she is brutally honest (that''s why I love her!). I couldn''t have done it without her - she also had the camera and was snapping away, so I could look at pics later. She had a great attitude, and made the experience so fun.

The second shopping trip, I took my MOH and two of my bridesmaids. My two bridemaids are much less vocal, so they were more along for the ride, and offered thoughts about what they liked. Ultimately though, its important to let yourself direct what you do and do not like, and don''t let yourself be influenced by what friends/family think.

If my mom didn''t live across the country, I would have taken her along both times.

The saleslady will help you into your dress, so that''s not a worry, but if you go places that allow pics, you will want someone to take photos. If you also find The Dress, it may be a letdown to be all alone - it is so much better having someone there to celebrate with, and reiterate your positive feelings about the dress.
 

lulu66

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May 21, 2009
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i have been dress shopping four times now, still no dress. the first time i went with my two sisters, which was nice, except my youngest sis (18) just stood around and texted the whole time but i really didn''t expect it any differently. the next time i went with my mom & sis; nice trip but the sales associate was not my fav, so that kind of ruined the trip. next i went with a large group of friends, which was fun because they all wanted to see me try on dresses but was not most conducive to finding a dress. then i went with two friends (one a bridesmaid). finally the last trip i went with just my best friend. this was by far the best choice because she knows what i like & don''t and was able to go through & pick out dresses i actually liked & give me honest opinions but agree with me when she knew i was really feeling a certain dress!
so, long story short take one to two people who know you really well! and have fun no matter who you go with!!!
 

Lilac

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I took my mom and stepmom the first time I went, and then the times after that I just went with my mom (it just happened to work out like that based on everyones'' schedules). I didn''t really want to bring any bridesmaids along and my sister was too young to really care to come along at the time.
 
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My mom (to pay for things and trying to bond over something, I guess)

My aunt (because we''re close)

MOH and bridesmaid (to try on and buy dresses)

--

Another friend found out we went and was pouting- almost in tears that I didn''t invite her. If I could invite her again, I would''ve- but since she''s not a BM I didn''t invite her.
 

soontowed

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Jul 28, 2009
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Myself the first few times. I didn''t want opinions until I had it narrowed down to a few style choices. When I was ready to buy, i took my sister mom, and friend of 25 years
 

OUpearlgirl

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If you want to go alone, do it!

I honestly don''t recommend going with a huge group or with super opinionated people because they can make the decision harder.
 

LabRatPhD

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I took my FI to my first appointment to see what styles he liked on me and went to the rest of my appointments alone. I don''t have many girlfriends and the ones I have live far away. I did not want my mom to come because I knew she would try to dissuade me from buying anything over $1000 (even though she was not paying). She also would have wanted me in a style I know I do not like. I ordered my dress the first and only day I went dress shopping. I am still in love with my dress so I think I made the best choice for me!
 

musey

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I thought about taking hubs, but my mom was excited to go with me so she flew out for a week of dress shopping. It was helpful to have someone there, but I think a range of people would be MORE helpful because just one opinion can sway you more than you''d like to be swayed. I chose a much different dress with my mother present than I think I would have on my own.

A number of opinions will become more like background noise, you''ll be more likely to go with your own instincts because chances are there is someone in the group that agrees with you... and if not, you can justify your own instincts by saying that everyone''s disagreeing.
 

bee*

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I went shopping with my mam and then when I found the dress I loved, I took my sister with me as well just to see what she thought of it.
 

Lauren8211

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Apr 25, 2008
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I went with a girlfriend the first time, but found myself "liking" everything to speed things along.


Next I went by myself and found the dress! Yay!
 

mayachel

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Mar 2, 2008
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I took my mom only. Primarily because my close friends do not live nearby, and my mom was the first to come to town. I also found my dress on day 2 of looking. Maybe tried on 12 gowns total?

If I were still looking, I'd take any of my BM individually. But wouldn't want the multiple people route.

As an aside, I went with one of my BMs when she went (wedding)dress shopping, again all of her family lived elsewhere at the time. It was so special to me, being her friend, to "get to go" with her and have some alone engagement/wedding planning time with her.

If you decide to take anyone, make sure that they are people who will help the day go easier and be thrilled for you from start to finish.
 

marlie

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i went once with just my mom, once with 8 people (mom, sister, aunt, cousin, grandma, fmil, fsil, best friend), another time with just one friend, another time with a different friend and back with my mom and fsil to actually buy the dress.

clearly, i''ve got issues! ha! i knew that i wanted people to come with me and i wanted opinions, but 8 people was FAR too many. they all convinced me that they should come and against my better judgement i let them all be there. it took away from the experience and made everything more confusing. the smaller groups i went with were more productive.

my advice for you, based on how you like to shop, is for you to go alone at first...shop around and get a clear picture in your head of what you want...then you can ask a friend or family member to join you to reassure you that your decisions are great.
 

jcrow

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as far as getting in and out of the dress, the sales people help you with that. i''ve had experiences where they wouldn''t let anyone but them help me with the dresses.

i took my maid of honor for one dress trip. for the rest, my cousin went with me. i didn''t want too many people to a- see the dresses and b- give their opinion. i wanted to not be swayed and it''s easy for that to happen if lots of people are throwing their opinions out there.
 

KimberlyH

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Jun 15, 2006
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My husband. He was the one I wanted to like the dress as much as I did, so it was just the two of us. He went to every fitting appt. as well.
 

canada_ham

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Sep 25, 2009
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i went by myself and i am really glad i did. my friends are very opinionated and having them there would have made the shopping experience very difficult
 

charbie

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it was just my mom and me the first time. she wanted that "moment" to herself. then my sister and i went to the ROTB event which was up in my hometown, so my MIL wasn''t able to come. i got my dress there, so no one saw the dress until wedding day.

i kind of liked it like that.
 

bobbin

Shiny_Rock
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Apr 28, 2008
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Thanks everyone. I think I will go alone the first time. I have always heard about how going dress shopping was such a bonding experience etc so I feel funny about wanting to go on my own, but I honestly feel more comfortable doing so. I might go with my cousin though as I feel completely comfortable around her..
 

princessplease

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Feb 20, 2009
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I took my mom and MOH on the shopping trip where I ended up finding ''the dress''.
 

Clairitek

Ideal_Rock
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Jul 21, 2008
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I did TONS of dress shopping... the first time I was alone, then I went to a couple of bridal salons with my MIL, once with my mom and an old friend from high school (I was in NYC at Kleinfeld and hadn''t seen the friend in 10 years!), David''s Bridal with just my mom, once with one of my closest friends and bridesmaids, and another time with Stephbolt. I found THE dress with MIL and then got another thumbs up from Stephbolt and that was the last time I went shopping before I bought the dress.

It was great going with MIL because she was pretty into it. She doesn''t have a daughter and its fun to do girly things with her. My mother really wasn''t into the whole dress shopping thing so it was nice to have a mom-like figure who was into it.
 

meresal

Ideal_Rock
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Nov 13, 2007
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I only took my mom. I value her opinion, (and that it is a very quiet one
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), and we have very similar taste. I knew she would pull things off the rack that would look good on me and not be "trendy".

My advice: Do NOT take anyone that is outspoken about their opinions. They will annoy you.

I took a friend to one place, and I couldn''t get out of there fast enough. She had opinions on dresses before we even stepped into the salon. It was not fun, and you tend to lose your own opinion.
 

ladypirate

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I went a couple of times with my sisters and one of my BMs. The final trip where we actually planned to buy the dress, though, I went with my mom, FI''s mom, my mom''s best friend (sort of like a second mom to me) and my sisters. It was great and we all ended up loving the same dress!
 

violet3

Ideal_Rock
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Dec 18, 2007
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Oh, um, everyone. I went with a couple of different friends, just my mom twice, my sister - you get the drift. My favorite shopping trips, however, were when i went alone. I did this twice and i am so happy i did. It really helped not to have people there that already had preconcieved notions about what you should be wearing. I found my dress on my own, and then brought everyone back to see it after.
 

aprilzephyr

Rough_Rock
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Jun 13, 2008
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I''ve been going by myself - I just moved to Australia so I don''t have anyone to shop with other than the SO. I did ask my parents to come with me to one of my appointments when I was still in NY, which was really nice because they both used to work in the garment industry and they know a lot about fabrics, etc. However going by myself has been great as I can search at my own pace and I only need to consult my schedule, and if I needed to mull over a decision, I could do it on my own time. But it would have been much nicer to have my parents give me some confirmation before I made my decision.
 

caribqueen

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Dec 22, 2008
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I think it really depends on the kind of person you are. I don''t enjoy shopping with others because I know what looks good on me and can make the decision for myself. I understand that a wedding dress is a bigger deal, but I still don''t think you need a lot of people.

The first time, I went by myself just to get a feel for what I liked, what I think I look good in and to get over the "I can''t believe I''m buying a wedding dress" thing. The second time, I brought a friend of mine back to the place to get her opinion for one silouette/style I liked. It''s a good thing I did that "prep work" in advance because I live 2,000 miles away from my mother and I knew we wouldn''t have a great deal of time to pick my dress when I visited her/home. So the third and last time, when I knew we were shopping seriously, I took my mom (I could never buy the dress without her) and my MOH and one of my BMs because we had a BMs appointment right after to pick their dress. If not for the BM dress appointment, I would not have taken my MOH and a BM. And because of the two visits I had prior to going with my mom, I knew what looked good on me and was able to nail down my dress and it ended up being the same silouette I tried on and liked previously.

Three people in addition to me I think is tops as far as how many people you should take to an appointment. Some people turn out to be too opinionated and can take over the appointment. The people I went with gave great feedback, but they allowed my voice to be heard first for every dress I tried on, and I had the last say.
 
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