Zoe''s FI''s and best man''s attire

[zoebartlett]

So we went to Men''s Warehouse today to look for suits and tuxes. We decided that the best man, my dad, and my FI''s dad will wear tuxes. Originally, we ordered blue vests and ties for the best man and our two dads. We didn''t like how the blue looked with the black but we left the order alone, knowing we could change it. We also ordered an ivory vest/tie for my FI to wear, and that looked fine. The best man and his girlfriend came over to our house afterwards and we decided to go to the MW''s site and see what else we liked instead of the blue vests. I''m glad we did because we discovered that the platinum and silver vests and ties looked really nice and both coordinate nicely with my ivory/champagne dress and my sister''s indigo bridesmaid''s dress. I''m going to call tomorrow and change the order. Thank God the best man''s girlfriend was there! She helped me/us out so much. It was the first time I had met her and she is great!

So here''s what we''re now planning on having the guy''s wear. Under each vest is a picture of our dresses. What do you think? Even though my dad''s not in the wedding party, the people at MW suggested that if the other guys were going with a tux, my dad should also. Then since everyone would be in a tux, my FI''s dad should also wear one. I''m not sure I really agree but I think our two dads are fine with wearing tuxes. I think they want to match the same level of formality as the other guys. Our dads will wear the same vest as the best man, the one on the left.

 

[zoebartlett]

Okay, I just got off the phone with my parents, who apparently don''t like the silver/platinum choices we had chosen after meeting my dad (my mom wasn''t there). This is what my mom would like to go with (below). They didn''t have champagne vests but my mom thinks that cream colored vest would look great AND we wouldn''t be introducing another new color, as we would be if we went with the silver. Ughh! I thought we had this all figured out but now it looks like we have to put the order on hold until my mom can go with me to look for herself. This is turning out to be more complicated than dress shopping!

 

[Selkie]

I guess I can see where your mom is coming from, although personally I really like the silver/black combo too and think it would coordinate well with almost any color combo. On the other hand, the cream vest does match the underlayer of your dress really well and would be a neutral complement to your sister's blue dress, so maybe that's what she's focusing on when she looks at the photos. Remind me again of your decorating colors?

What style MW tux did they choose? I ask because you could barely even see the vest DH wore with his, just the tie really. He wore burgundy to coordinate with the red accents in my dress.

 

[zoebartlett]

Hi Selkie!

Here''s the tux:

Joseph and Feiss 2 button tux in black (besom front pockets -- no flap, as you''d find on regular suit pockets)

 

[zoebartlett]

My dad chose one type of shirt (pointed collar) and my FI and his best man (who chose whatever my FI liked), chose another (wing collar). My dad''s is on the left and my FI and best man''s is on the right. I think they''re shown in different colors but I''m pretty sure they all got the same color. Oh, this is all very confusing now...

 

[zoebartlett]

Selkie,

I wish my mom had been there and then we wouldn''t have to go back and change everything. Oh well. I DO think the cream would look good but we had originally asked for champagne so my FI could coordinate with the champagne color of my sash. I guess they don''t have champagne. The cream does look nice but if we do ivory shirts and cream vests and ties, won''t that be a lot of cream/ivory on top of each other? Too much?

 

[zoebartlett]

Here''s the cufflinks they chose:

silver and black set

 

[zoebartlett]

Should we have gotten pocket squares? We''re doing bouts...

Oh, about our color scheme...we don''t have one. Our ceremony will be outdoors on the lawn in front of a gazebo, which we''ll probably decorate with some sort of flower arrangment. The reception will be inside the restaurant. The restaurant is heavily decorated with burgandy (burgandy plush chairs and wall to wall carpet). We''re using white table linens instead of the white linens with a burgandy overlay which is what they usually have on the tables. We wanted to break up all the red. The beams and trim are a darker shade of brown. I''m not sure what we''re doing for flowers yet, as far as type and color go.

I''m not sure what my mom or my FI''s mom will wear.

 

[gtn]

Although I see what your mother is saying, I think you should go with what you like. Since you don''t have a color scheme to keep with. Alternately, you father doesn''t need to coordinate with the groomsman so he could wear theot

 

[zoebartlett]

Thanks Gtn! It doesn''t really matter to me what everyone wears but I was just frustrated because I thought we had it all figured out. I know my dad doesn''t need to coordinate -- he doesn''t even need to wear a tux, but he feels like if the others are wearing tuxes, he should too. Then, if my dad''s going to wear one, my FI''s father may as well also. But really, our dads aren''t part of the wedding party so no, they don''t need to do the tux thing. He didn''t get to wear one for my sister''s wedding, and I think he wants to wear one for ONE of his daughters.

 

[monarch64]

I vote for the silver...let''s be consistent across the board, imo.

 

[Sabine]

Just wanted to chime in that we wanted my dad and FI''s dad to wear silver vests/ties with black tuxes, and they had a problem with it as well. I think they were afraid that it would be too flashy/shiny. We still don''t know what they''re going to wear!

 

[Sha]

The silver vests are pretty, but IMO, they don't go well with the warm, muted colours of your dress - especially the peachy sash (although the vests go well with the blue dress). The cream vests coordinate a LOT better - I think that cream, peach, and ivory complement each other more than silver, peach, and ivory do.

What is your colour scheme? Is it more in the blue/white/black colour family or the ivory/champagne/peach colour category?
Silver seems to work best with cooler colours -like whites, blacks, blues, purples, violets, etc -while gold/cream works best with a warmer colour palette.

ETA: Instead of cream vests, could you go with another warm colour, like a darker brown, or cream and light blue print maybe? Maybe you could coordinate with the blue in your bridesmaid dress by having the men wear cream vests with light blue ties, or light blue vests with cream ties? That would tie all the colours together.

 

[bensbride]

I''m not sure how people work it with pocket squares vs bouts. I am a pocket square freak! I always comment on the pocket squares of the guys doing the halftime commentary in NFL games. My BF and his friends have started commenting on them too, since NFL sunday is pretty much a weekly tradition. I will be in trouble if I don''t include them in the wedding! Do people put the flower on the opposite side as the pocket square or do they just not do flowers for the guys if they have a colorful pocket square?

 

[zoebartlett]

Date: 2/11/2008 8:19:53 AM
Author: Sha
The silver vests are pretty, but IMO, they don''t go well with the warm, muted colours of your dress - especially the peachy sash (although the vests go well with the blue dress). The cream vests coordinate a LOT better - I think that cream, peach, and ivory complement each other more than silver, peach, and ivory do.

What is your colour scheme? Is it more in the blue/white/black colour family or the ivory/champagne/peach colour category?
Silver seems to work best with cooler colours -like whites, blacks, blues, purples, violets, etc -while gold/cream works best with a warmer colour palette.

ETA: Instead of cream vests, could you go with another warm colour, like a darker brown, or cream and light blue print maybe? Maybe you could coordinate with the blue in your bridesmaid dress by having the men wear cream vests with light blue ties, or light blue vests with cream ties? That would tie all the colours together.

Hi Sha,

Thanks for your comments and questions! We don''t really have a color scheme for the wedding. My sash, although it looks peachy or pink is actually champagne. I do like the cream vests and I think my mom and I are going to take my FI and maybe my dad back to MW to see what else they have. Your suggestion of having the guys wear cream vests and light blue ties (or vice versa) has me thinking of another possiblity I hadn''t considered before. Thanks!

 

[sap483]

Hey Zoe,

Another vote for the cream vests. I think they look nicer with your dress than the silver ones. I agree with Sha, your dress is warmer and IMO the silver is too cool. I like her thoughts on coordinating the ties with the bridesmaid dresses too!

 

[zoebartlett]

Update: we went back to Men''s Warehouse today and changed the vests and ties. All of the men, my FI, best man, and my dad, are going to wear ivory shirts, ivory vests -- "Tuscany" patterned, and plain ivory ties. My FI''s shirt is going to have a wing-tip collar and the others will have regular pointed collars. I''m so glad my mom came with us this time. We got done in 30 minutes what it took the rest of us over an hour to do last weekend. I was going to put together a collage to post, but on the computer, each "ivory" that was shown looked very different than it does in person. I was afraid they wouldn''t look right. In person they coordinate nicely, on the computer, not so much. Oh well, you get the idea. We''re all very happy and now this is something else we can cross off our list. Yay!

 

[Selkie]

Yay! I''m glad Tux-gate ''08 is settled, and everyone''s happy, Zoe.

 

[zoebartlett]

Date: 2/17/2008 4:12:52 PM
Author: Selkie
Yay! I''m glad Tux-gate ''08 is settled, and everyone''s happy, Zoe.

Thanks Selkie! I thought you''d all be dying to know what happened.