Would you tell a friend if something was possibly wrong with their kid?

[Haven]

Honestly, he doesn''t look like he has anything wrong with his eyes to me. They both appear to be focused on the same thing/spot. That is how you can tell. I''d say that his left eye appears to be closer to the middle because of the way his eyes are situated in relation to his nose, not because his left eye is focusing on a different spot than his right eye.

When someone has a lazy eye, or worse, Strabismus, their eyes do not focus on the same spot. It''s very obvious when this is going on. (Well, apparently it''s obvious *unless* that someone is your sister!)

Now that I''ve seen the pictures I wouldn''t say anything at all to your friend.

 

[Haven]

Doh! That will teach me to read the entire thread before I respond instead of after. I saw the pictures and hit "reply" immediately. Patience, patience.

Sorry, now I see that my last post is totally irrelevant. I''m glad it went well and that there''s nothing wrong with the little cutie!

 

[iluvcarats]

Date: 11/23/2009 7:17:01 PM
Author: Haven
Honestly, he doesn''t look like he has anything wrong with his eyes to me. They both appear to be focused on the same thing/spot. That is how you can tell. I''d say that his left eye appears to be closer to the middle because of the way his eyes are situated in relation to his nose, not because his left eye is focusing on a different spot than his right eye.


When someone has a lazy eye, or worse, Strabismus, their eyes do not focus on the same spot. It''s very obvious when this is going on. (Well, apparently it''s obvious *unless* that someone is your sister!)


Now that I''ve seen the pictures I wouldn''t say anything at all to your friend.

Actually, strabismus isn''t always obvious. Both my eyes turned out slightly, but nobody knew until one day I happily said "I can make it be two!" It corrected itself and then came back in my 30''s.

 

[Haven]

I''m shocked to hear that a case of Strabismus corrected itself. Everything we ever read or heard from the doctors always said Strabismus does not correct itself.

I wonder if you had a different condition that was mistakenly diagnosed as Strabismus?

Either way, it''s great that it did correct itself.

 

[iluvcarats]

Date: 11/23/2009 7:44:49 PM
Author: Haven
I''m shocked to hear that a case of Strabismus corrected itself. Everything we ever read or heard from the doctors always said Strabismus does not correct itself.


I wonder if you had a different condition that was mistakenly diagnosed as Strabismus?


Either way, it''s great that it did correct itself.

It didn''t correct itself. I had to do eye muscle exercises to strengthen the muscles. It didn''t go away on it''s own, but I was able to strengthen the muscles with exercises. Definitely strabismus, as I had strabismus surgery last year. It is a convergence insufficiency. But my eyes turned out very slightly, so most people could not tell by looking at me. Maybe because it was so slight is why the exercise worked. However slight though, double vision is double vision. I have weak eye muscles, and after having kids my eyes muscles were weakened by the lack of sleep. After becoming so reliant on prisms that I kept needing more and more, I opted for surgery.

 

[Haven]

Date: 11/23/2009 7:22:46 PM
Author: iluvcarats
Actually, strabismus isn't always obvious. Both my eyes turned out slightly, but nobody knew until one day I happily said 'I can make it be two!' It corrected itself and then came back in my 30's.

Sorry, I misunderstood. I thought when you said it corrected itself in this post that you meant, well, that it corrected itself!

I'm glad to hear that your surgery worked.

May I ask--was it the pregnancy that brought it back? My sister has had periods when it gets worse and she gets very serious side effects from the Strabismus. Her freshman year of college was bad, and the doctor said it was due to the stress. I'm curious if she should prepare herself to have a similar situation when she becomes pregnant in the future.

It's a scary condition, she's become extremely ill from her eye issues in the past and it frightens me.

Thank you for sharing your story.

 

[iluvcarats]

No need to apologize Haven. It was worded in a way that made it sound like the double vision magically disappeared. Hormones can have an effect. I believe pregnancy hormones (esp. estrogen and prolactin) can have a relaxing effect on the muscles. For me the trigger was the stress of having a colicky newborn who didn't sleep. At that time I also had a recurrence of iritis, which is a very serious disease, also brought on by stress. My surgery wasn't entirely successful. My close up vision is perfect, and I do not feel so tired all the time. However, now my at certain angles my distance vision is double. It is one diopter off, and the chance of correcting it through surgery is slim. There is an option of botox injections in the eye, but because mine is so slight, there is a great chance it won't work.

I am sorry that your sister is struggling with this. FWIW, I do not regret the surgery, because even though I didn't get a perfect outcome, I do not feel as exhausted all the time. Before, all I wanted to do was keep my eyes closed. Tired eye muscles made me feel sleepy. So, it did improve my quality of life, and there is still a chance that my brain will adjust, and my vision will be normal.

Best of luck to your sister, and may I add that she is very lucky to have such a caring sister

 

[Logan Sapphire]

Weighing in really late since you already found out the answer, but my daughter is also Korean and her adoption agency noted that she might have a crossed eye similar to your friend''s son. The doctor in Korea said no, our international adoption doctor said no, the regular pediatrician said no, my eye dr uncle said no, and finally the pediatric opthamologist said no. It''s kind of a trick of the eye, and like your friend said, has something to do with the bridge of the nose.

 

[Haven]

Thank you for sharing all that, iluv. I''m so glad to hear that you''ve had such wonderful results. I worry about my sister a lot, especially since she just finished her undergrad a year ago and is now in the first of six years of her graduate study to become a rabbi. Talk about needing to use your eyes a lot. Not to mention: stress.

Anyway, I really value hearing real life stories about the surgery. With doctors it''s always about statistics and percentages of improvements and yadda yadda yadda. It''s nice to hear how real people deal with their situation, and how they feel about their choices after they decide to have surgery.

I bet she''d call me overprotective rather than caring, but I know she''ll appreciate it when she''s older.

 

[LtlFirecracker]

TG - that turned out to be a happy ending. There are some simple tests you can do in the doctor''s office to see if they are really crossed or just appear to be crossed. The eyes can cross until about 4 months, than they should be referred.

I have a dilemma to deal with. The mom who is in denial. I just found out a kid has multiple autistic features and the mother refused the developmental evaluation because "she is not ready to deal with this." I am not sure if I am ready to deal with her. But I know I have to for the sake of the child as early intervention is the child''s best hope. I have spent most of my evening trying to figure out how I will say what I need to say without coming across as authoritative and rude. I have never had to deal with a situation like this before.

 

[iluvcarats]

Date: 11/23/2009 8:41:41 PM
Author: Haven
Thank you for sharing all that, iluv. I''m so glad to hear that you''ve had such wonderful results. I worry about my sister a lot, especially since she just finished her undergrad a year ago and is now in the first of six years of her graduate study to become a rabbi. Talk about needing to use your eyes a lot. Not to mention: stress.


Anyway, I really value hearing real life stories about the surgery. With doctors it''s always about statistics and percentages of improvements and yadda yadda yadda. It''s nice to hear how real people deal with their situation, and how they feel about their choices after they decide to have surgery.


I bet she''d call me overprotective rather than caring, but I know she''ll appreciate it when she''s older.

I don''t blame you for worrying Haven - Rabbis use their eyes a lot. Also, the writing in the Torah can be tiny.

What a wonderful calling though. You and your family must be so proud of her. We belong to a small shul which has a male and female rabbi. It''s nice to have representation

Best of luck to her, and I hope her eyes stay healthy and strong.

 

[Haven]

Thank you! I hope so, too.

And yes, I love the female representation in the rabbinate!

 

[iluvcarats]

Date: 11/23/2009 8:45:27 PM
Author: LtlFirecracker
TG - that turned out to be a happy ending. There are some simple tests you can do in the doctor''s office to see if they are really crossed or just appear to be crossed. The eyes can cross until about 4 months, than they should be referred.


I have a dilemma to deal with. The mom who is in denial. I just found out a kid has multiple autistic features and the mother refused the developmental evaluation because ''she is not ready to deal with this.'' I am not sure if I am ready to deal with her. But I know I have to for the sake of the child as early intervention is the child''s best hope. I have spent most of my evening trying to figure out how I will say what I need to say without coming across as authoritative and rude. I have never had to deal with a situation like this before.

Ltl - What a difficult situation. The truth isn''t always welcome. I am sure you will find a way to present it as gently as you can. It sucks to be the bad guy though. Hoping it goes smoothly for you.

 

[TravelingGal]

Date: 11/23/2009 7:17:01 PM
Author: Haven
Honestly, he doesn''t look like he has anything wrong with his eyes to me. They both appear to be focused on the same thing/spot. That is how you can tell. I''d say that his left eye appears to be closer to the middle because of the way his eyes are situated in relation to his nose, not because his left eye is focusing on a different spot than his right eye.

When someone has a lazy eye, or worse, Strabismus, their eyes do not focus on the same spot. It''s very obvious when this is going on. (Well, apparently it''s obvious *unless* that someone is your sister!)

Now that I''ve seen the pictures I wouldn''t say anything at all to your friend.

You know, I looked at the pictures for the same thing...I know when things look off, the light reflecting is in different places and his DOES look like they are in the same place. But because of his condition, he definitely appears crossed eyed at times, per the doc. Interesting eh?

 

[LtlFirecracker]

Date: 11/23/2009 9:05:14 PM
Author: iluvcarats

Date: 11/23/2009 8:45:27 PM

Author: LtlFirecracker

TG - that turned out to be a happy ending. There are some simple tests you can do in the doctor''s office to see if they are really crossed or just appear to be crossed. The eyes can cross until about 4 months, than they should be referred.



I have a dilemma to deal with. The mom who is in denial. I just found out a kid has multiple autistic features and the mother refused the developmental evaluation because ''she is not ready to deal with this.'' I am not sure if I am ready to deal with her. But I know I have to for the sake of the child as early intervention is the child''s best hope. I have spent most of my evening trying to figure out how I will say what I need to say without coming across as authoritative and rude. I have never had to deal with a situation like this before.

Ltl - What a difficult situation. The truth isn''t always welcome. I am sure you will find a way to present it as gently as you can. It sucks to be the bad guy though. Hoping it goes smoothly for you.

I am sure it will be OK. I just realized how hard this when when I was telling my BF about it. He kept tell me how firm I needed to be blah blah blah. Then I reminded him that his sister or mother do not want to hear from me that his nephew has motor and speech delays....he shut up and changed the subject.

I am sure in 2 - 3 years from now, this will just be a regular part of the job.

Thanks for the kind words, I have been stressing about it most of the evening.

 

[TravelingGal]

Date: 11/23/2009 10:38:13 PM
Author: LtlFirecracker

Date: 11/23/2009 9:05:14 PM
Author: iluvcarats

Date: 11/23/2009 8:45:27 PM

Author: LtlFirecracker

TG - that turned out to be a happy ending. There are some simple tests you can do in the doctor''s office to see if they are really crossed or just appear to be crossed. The eyes can cross until about 4 months, than they should be referred.



I have a dilemma to deal with. The mom who is in denial. I just found out a kid has multiple autistic features and the mother refused the developmental evaluation because ''she is not ready to deal with this.'' I am not sure if I am ready to deal with her. But I know I have to for the sake of the child as early intervention is the child''s best hope. I have spent most of my evening trying to figure out how I will say what I need to say without coming across as authoritative and rude. I have never had to deal with a situation like this before.

Ltl - What a difficult situation. The truth isn''t always welcome. I am sure you will find a way to present it as gently as you can. It sucks to be the bad guy though. Hoping it goes smoothly for you.

I am sure it will be OK. I just realized how hard this when when I was telling my BF about it. He kept tell me how firm I needed to be blah blah blah. Then I reminded him that his sister or mother do not want to hear from me that his nephew has motor and speech delays....he shut up and changed the subject.

I am sure in 2 - 3 years from now, this will just be a regular part of the job.

Thanks for the kind words, I have been stressing about it most of the evening.

I don''t have any advice - just wanted to say my heart goes out to you. It''s a tough job, but a wonderful job that you do. I know you will do well when you deal with this difficult situation.

 

[miraclesrule]

Well, I''m personally a "Buttinsky". I butt into everyone''s business. It''s a bad habit.

But the crossed eye thing is not hard to miss. I noticed my daughter''s by 3 months. Her pedi made me wait until the 6-month checkup to see if it corrected itself. It didn''t. We patched, but the odd thing was that she would use the "lazy" eye perfectly if her good eye was patched. It really stumped the pediatric opthamologist.

She started wearing glasses by nine months with intermittent patching. She eventually had surgery at 18 months. Either way, she never did have vision problems until school time. Fast forward 20+ years and she discovers that she is monocular. It can''t be corrected. Her brain just refuses to use both eyes at the same time.

It probably happened when I was waitressing at 8 months pregnant and slipped and fall while carrying a cheeseburger plate. French fries were flying allright...all over the restaurant floor.

Personally, I mention anything that doesn''t seem right with a child, only after careful observation and in a way that merely suggests they might want to get it checked for reassurance purposes. Not every new Mom knows what to look for or what is normal because there is just too many conflicting opinions from experts and resources. I think it demonstrates a caring attitude and my observations are usually considered valuable so I have never been met with a defensive attitude from a parent but a grateful one.

 

[ladyciel]

This is kind of OT (and it got really long! sorry!), but there''s been enough discussion/curiosity about it that I''ll share. I too have had eye muscle surgery - once as a baby on both eyes, and again on my left eye when I was 9. My cross-eyes were quite obvious as a baby, and my mom says I would reach for a toy and miss it by a few inches because I was apparently trying to grab the wrong copy. Despite my muscle/coordination problems, I didn''t need my first pair of glasses until 2nd grade. The second surgery was a year or two later. I''m myopic with astigmatism in both eyes, though my left is weaker on every count. Patching as a baby/kid definitely strengthened my left eye, but it''s still a bit screwy and contacts/glasses can only correct it to 20/30 or so. It''s kind of hard to tell exactly what my vision is in that eye, because the second you cover my right and ask me to focus on something like an eye chart, I can''t hold my left eye still enough to really get a grasp of the letter. Thankfully my right is stronger and is correctable to about 20/20. what my vision translates to in day to day life I''ve always questioned, because I can never make out distant objects/signs as well as any of my naturally, or corrected to, 20/20 friends (ignoring the friend with "better than perfect" vision).

As a kid, I remember getting to entertain a group of med students at Johns Hopkins during one of my visits to my specialist there. By then I had gained an uncanny control of whether I used both eyes, my right only, or my left only. My doc had me demonstrate for them. When I "turn off" one or the other eye, it behaves kind of like it would when the doc uses prisms to test them...floating off in its preferred direction(s). Let''s just say I can win any staring contest just by freaking out my opponent.

Now, as an adult, I don''t normally notice the problems with my vision unless I''m really tired. People who know me well can tell when I''m tired, because I end up using only right eye. For anyone with similar problems, I REALLY REALLY recommend contacts over glasses. My ability to coordinate my eyes and use them together improved drastically after wearing contacts for a while. I attribute the difference to the small field of view provided by glasses, combined with the line created by the frames themselves. I figured out that if I tried to look somewhere and one eye lost lens and/or hit frame, my brain would ignore it and switch to the unobstructed view from the other eye. Simpler than turning my head, no? I can''t stand to wear glasses anymore, because I''m too aware of the eye-switching.

 

[mia1181]

Okay now I am going to completely threadjack because it seems T-Gal''s original topic has been resolved. (Please don''t hurt me Tgal!

)

Miracles- Your daughter is like me, I''m monocular too. I''ll bet she can''t see those "Magic Eye" things either and has poor depth perception too. That''s the only thing that really bothers me about my vision. The vision in my good eye uncorrected makes up for my bad eye (20/15), but growing up when those Magic eye picturres and posters where so popular I really felt left out that no matter how hard I tried I couldn''t see the image.


LadyCiel- Do you patch as an adult? I knew a pediatric opthamologist who was very into patching and has continued patching regularly her whole adult life. I recently went and saw a pediatric opthamologist of my own (I guess thats who you see for Amblyopia, which is what I have, even adults) and he really wanted me to try patching for a few months and see if there is a slight improvement. Unfortunately, I moved so I really want to see another doctor for a baseline eye exam before I start.

 

[Jas12]

wow, tgal, i was thinking about this question (it''s a tricky one) but i am glad it resolved itself well. And ya, now that the real reason for the ''cross-eyed illusion'' is known, i can totally see it.
Learn somethin'' new every day !

 

[ladyciel]

Mia - no, I haven't patched since I was a kid, and yes, I always saw a pediatric ophthalmologist/surgeon growing up. They're typically the specialists to see for these issues because they're problems mostly identified and treated in children. You mentioned amblyopia, yet another term that applies to me. Twice surgically-mediated strabismus + amblyopia + latent nystagmus (involuntary eye movements when you cover one of my eyes) + myopic with irregular astigmatism in both eyes. I'm lucky I see as well as I do. I don't patch, but I do sometimes "turn off" my good eye and see what kind of control I can keep of my lazier one. While my depth perception was AWFUL when I was younger, I've found it's improved a lot. It's amazing how we can learn to adapt, though. I remember in my freshman psychology class the professor pulled a couple of jocks up to the front of the room and bet them they couldn't catch a ball with one eye closed. She was right - they couldn't. I think the point of the lesson was perception and how our brains are trained to use both eyes for depth, not just relational clues (this thing appears bigger than that thing, etc). Anyway, I was sorry I didn't volunteer for the task, because I would have caught the darn thing after all my years of practice.

I never could, and still can't, see the magic eye things. However, I've gotten to the point that as long as I'm well rested I can see the effects from 3D glasses (with the red/blue lenses in them). That was something that NEVER worked for me when I was younger, so I've definitely improved. I think the issue with the magic eye thing is my eyes/brain just fight it too much. They always take the easy road...if that means monocular vision, so be it.

I actually find I have the worst issues with my vision when driving at night. For one, I see starbursts (like the photos they show illustrating the possible side-effects of laser surgery), which I'm guessing is from the uncorrectable part of my astigmatism. For two, I sometimes have a hard time judging the distance/speed of oncoming traffic based on their headlights. I'd assume it was a normal thing, except there are plenty of times when my husband looks at me like "why aren't you going???". I suspect it's because without all of the relational clues I'm used to relying on, I don't have the same faith in what binocular depth perception I DO have. I always take the conservative approach of not pulling out into traffic until I'm completely confident it's safe, but there are times when in hindsight I could have gone 10x over. Oh well. Better safe than sorry.

 

[Dreamer_D]

I would show her the pics and point out what I saw and then totally leave it at that.

ETA I'm glad it worked out!

 

[mia1181]

Ladyciel- Yes! ditto to a lot of what you said! I only have Amblyopia, there is no known cause for me (it''s usually caused by strabismus). Randomly people I know will say they have seen my eye move but it was after I told them I had a "lazy eye" and sooooo many people mistake that for a "wandering eye" so people don''t know what I am talking about and I think they look for something. But I don''t see anything in pictures and no doctor has ever said my eye moves. What I do find myself doing is turning my head so that I am pointing my good eye at what I am looking at instead of both eyes so I think that is what people may notice about me.

I do think there is a misalignment of some sort because I have difficulty driving when I am really tired. I will get a little double vision of the two yellow lines in the middle of the road. It''s not bad, I just see the regular image and then a fainter image next to it. It''s just the lines I see two of too.

As for depth perception, I never noticed a problem with depth perception (i really have no basis for comparison) but at my last doctor visit I asked and they tested me. You just look at a image and I guess there is something you are supposed to see and I couldn''t see it so they said I have no depth perception. I also have a hard time judging car distance with headlights and also some problems with parking (too far from the curb). Like you it''s more that I am too cautious and I don''t really know if thats a vision thing or if I am just paranoid. I can''t see magic eyes but I can see 3d with the glasses (unless it is a really cheap cereal box prize).