Find your diamond
Find your jewelry
shape
carat
color
clarity

Would you keep an *ugly* ring JUST because it was an heirloom?

pearaffair

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Jun 15, 2015
Messages
3,080
I have a ring that belonged to my grandmother. I’ll post a pic later but it’s essentially a cheap gold band, with a design that is not my style at all.

I am so tempted to sell it for scrap, especially with the price of gold having gone up. But I have so few heirloom pieces that it seems wrong to do this.

But I will never ever ever wear it.

Thoughts?
 

Nikki1415

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
May 17, 2018
Messages
812
I have a ring that belonged to my grandmother. I’ll post a pic later but it’s essentially a cheap gold band, with a design that is not my style at all.

I am so tempted to sell it for scrap, especially with the price of gold having gone up. But I have so few heirloom pieces that it seems wrong to do this.

But I will never ever ever wear it.

Thoughts?
I think it depends on how attached your grandmother was to the ring and if you would feel bad for selling the ring. Jewelry is jewelry but it can have sentimental value to you so only you can decide if you want to keep it.
In a way I had a similar situation: I inherited my grandmas jewelry and sold off the jewelry that were outdated and I would never wear (things my parents but for her & she would wear once in a blue moon, so she was never attached to them).
There are main pieces that I wouldn't sell such as a gold necklace with her zodiac sign medallion that my grandpa bought her and she HATED it bought wore it all the time because my grandfather bought it for her. I find it hilarious that she hated it because I love it and wear it. It's probably the most sentimental piece because it's a memory from both my grandmother and grandfather.
Also, there are other pieces that I have from her that I rarely wear but I keep because she loved them and I would feel guilty if I sold them.
 

AllAboardTheBlingTrain

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Apr 22, 2020
Messages
790
I think if you truly will never, ever wear it it’s a waste to have it lying around collecting dust, especially, as you said, scrap price of gold is pretty high right now. Few questions I would ask myself:

- why do you feel guilty about scrapping the piece? Is there someone else in the family (mother, siblings, daughters) who would love to wear that ring?

- can it be “remade” to fit a style you are more likely to wear?

- are you generally a super sentimental person, ie, do you feel like you shouldn’t sell (But you want to) or do you feel like you don’t want to sell (but you feel like you should so it doesn’t just sit around)?

- what do you feel about selling the ring and putting the proceeds towards a piece that reminds you of your grandmother?

Just my $0.02. Food for thought :)
 

Rhea

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Oct 20, 2007
Messages
6,306
Personally, I would keep. There are so few heirlooms in my family that I'd want it.

I just inherited my grandparent's wedding set. I think it's a 0.05ct in 10k gold with matching plain thin and narrow bands. It's so light that it'd scrap for tens of dollars not hundreds of dollars. They married when they were 18 and were together until they died in their 80's.

If it were valuable, I'd probably sell because it really will just sit around, but for me, I can't imgaine selling their rings of their over 60 year marriage for what would amount to a meal for 1 at McDonald's.

@AllAboardTheBlingTrain asks some excellent questions!
" do you feel like you shouldn’t sell (But you want to) or do you feel like you don’t want to sell (but you feel like you should so it doesn’t just sit around)?"
 

dk168

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Jul 7, 2013
Messages
7,097
i would try and repurpose the item into something I could wear myself first. If that is not possible, I would get rid of it, probably by selling it.

DK :))
 

Snowdrop13

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Aug 27, 2011
Messages
2,090
My beloved grandmother had very few items of “real” jewellery, but when I was 16 she gave me the gold bangle her father had given her. It’s an old fashioned design and I’ve never worn it. However, the fact that she gave it to me from her hands means a lot to me. So I think it really depends on the sentimental value for you.

My plan for my bangle? My niece is 16 next year and is the only girl in the next generation. I’m giving it to her as I think Granny would love that!
 

Austina

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Feb 24, 2017
Messages
4,664
I‘m not sentimental about jewellery, so if I knew I would never wear, and you could put it towards something I would, I’d sell.

Look at it this way, would your grandmother be happier that you had something you wore all the time, and every time you wore it you thought of her, or would she rather you kept it, sitting in a box that never saw the light of day?
 

Roselina

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Feb 1, 2020
Messages
508
I would keep it. Unless you have some other piece to remember her and also depending on what it meant to her.
 

missy

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Jun 8, 2008
Messages
40,895
That is a tough question. How much would you be able to get for it? If it isn't much I would just keep it. One's taste can change and perhaps you can retrofit it into a piece of jewelry you would enjoy wearing? I bet there is something you can make from it that you would wear. And then you can always think of her when you wear it and keep her close to your heart. I would love to have something like that from my grandma but unfortunately she didn't have much jewelry and what she did have my aunt and mom have and I have nothing of hers like that. Even if it were ugly I would want it. Sorry perhaps I am not the best person to ask because I miss my grandma so much even all these decades later. :(


ETA: I am generally not sentimental about jewelry but for something from my grandma I would be. But that is me. You should do what is best for you and only you know the answer to that question for you. Also if your grandmother wouldn't have minded what you do with it you should do whatever you want with it. What works best for you. I am so sorry for your loss. Grandmas are very special people.
 

pearaffair

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Jun 15, 2015
Messages
3,080
Lots of good ideas here. Thank you, everyone. I think I will wait before deciding. I don’t think my grandma would mind either way as jewellery wasn’t important to her and it wasn’t something she specifically left me.
 

missy

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Jun 8, 2008
Messages
40,895
Lots of good ideas here. Thank you, everyone. I think I will wait before deciding. I don’t think my grandma would mind either way as jewellery wasn’t important to her and it wasn’t something she specifically left me.
That leaves it wide open for you to do exactly what you want to do when you figure it out. Good luck and hope whatever it is you decide you have fun with it and enjoy whatever you make/get from it.
 

chrono

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Apr 22, 2004
Messages
37,526
I am keeping all the gemstone jewellery and gold items that are in at least decent shape. I melted down my parents wedding band as they were bent out of shape and the original design is so worn down that it’s completely gone.
 

AllAboardTheBlingTrain

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Apr 22, 2020
Messages
790
Lots of good ideas here. Thank you, everyone. I think I will wait before deciding. I don’t think my grandma would mind either way as jewellery wasn’t important to her and it wasn’t something she specifically left me.
If you decide to keep it and post a pic of the ring perhaps we can brainstorm ideas of how to convert it into something that is more your style! Best of luck with whatever you decide :)
 

icy_jade

Ideal_Rock
Joined
May 1, 2009
Messages
3,488
I don’t think my grandma would mind either way as jewellery wasn’t important to her and it wasn’t something she specifically left me.
If that’s the case, then maybe it makes sense cashing it or converting it to something that you’ll love.

I have a chain from my grandmother that I’ve never worn due to the design and color, but it’s the only thing that she left to me so I won’t sell unless I really must. Whenever I come across the chain while sorting my things it reminds me of her so the chain has a lot of sentimental value attached to it. I figure by the time the chain goes to my daughter she will probably sell but that’s fine since I won’t be around to mind.

Sorry for the rather rambling story but this thread made me think of my grandmother. Still miss her!
 

MeowMeow

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Nov 27, 2009
Messages
1,183
I've kept a lot from my grandmother that isn't to my taste because of that exact reason. I have a daughter who is little. It may be to her taste in the future. Who knows. If she hates it and ends up deciding she doesn't want children then I might scrap it. I would have to because you can't take it with you after all. But until I know for sure I will just continue to let it live in the bank.
 

Roselina

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Feb 1, 2020
Messages
508
Good idea! Convert it. I did that with quite a few inherited pieces. You keep it, but you love and wear it! Win win!
 

pearlsngems

Brilliant_Rock
Premium
Joined
Jan 4, 2010
Messages
1,380
I have sold gold for scrap when it didn't suit me, regardless of the source. I prefer to own things I actually like and use.
 

Big Fat Facets

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Jun 7, 2019
Messages
1,285
it really depends on how sentimental the jewelry piece is to you. and only you can determine that.

for me, i think i'd rather be wearing and enjoying a piece instead of having it tucked away.

converting by melting the metal into a piece you actually enjoy instead of selling for scrap. resetting a stone into a setting that you like
 

Arcadian

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Sep 17, 2008
Messages
7,625
I would think it depends on the relationship you have with one departed.

For myself I would keep it forever. 30+ years and I miss her sometimes like it was yesterday. March and October are the hardest months for me to endure. She wasn't nana or grandma, she was Mother. She really was that 2nd mother to me.

her bible is near the corner of my desk. while I'm not religous, seeing it and sometimes holding it during more stressful times is a comfort. I keep it not because its a bible, but "her bible".
 

AprilBaby

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Jul 17, 2008
Messages
11,313
I’m not super sentimental so I would either sell it to someone who loves it as vintage, melt it into a new project or scrap it.
 

LilAlex

Brilliant_Rock
Premium
Joined
Mar 3, 2018
Messages
596
Beloved grandmother? Then hell yes I'd keep it forever!

Or an "heirloom" with no emotional connection...?

Had a dear aunt who filled the GM role for my "grandmother-less" siblings and me. She had four or five pieces of modest gold jewelry that she never took off -- rings and link bracelets. Not any of our style or our spouse's styles but we cherish the memories and like thinking about them and knowing they're there. That said, if we needed to put food on the table, we would part with them -- she would definitely want that.
 

TooPatient

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Sep 1, 2009
Messages
9,299
Beloved grandmother? Then hell yes I'd keep it forever!

Or an "heirloom" with no emotional connection...?

Had a dear aunt who filled the GM role for my "grandmother-less" siblings and me. She had four or five pieces of modest gold jewelry that she never took off -- rings and link bracelets. Not any of our style or our spouse's styles but we cherish the memories and like thinking about them and knowing they're there. That said, if we needed to put food on the table, we would part with them -- she would definitely want that.
This.

With the added thought that you may have kids, grandkids, nieces, etc who may like the style one day and enjoy the connection to her.
 

seaurchin

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Nov 2, 2012
Messages
1,366
It's really just up to you. A few thoughts, for what they're worth:

Do you have anyone to pass it down to who might want it?

If how much money you can get for it will influence your decision, you could find that out, if you don't already know. I wouldn't expect the small amount of gold in a ring to bring in much, regardless of the price gold is at, but what is "much" to someone varies.

According to housekeeping/de-cluttering experts like Marie Condo and Flylady, your feeling when you look at something counts hugely. So under that philosophy, items that "spark joy" or make you feel uplifted when you see them would stay and those that make you feel down when you see them, for whatever reason, would go.

Is there anything else you might want to do with it, like have it melted down and included in a jewelry piece you do like or otherwise modify it, either now or at a later date (if it holds important sentimental value to you)?

Imagine it gone. How do you feel?

Or if you are completely on the fence about it, you could just put it away and not deal with it now. After all, a ring hardly takes up any space.
 

Gussie

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Apr 20, 2017
Messages
3,000
As a guesstimate, a 3mm wide 18k gold ring size 6.5 weighs about 4g. Gold at $63 per gram would net at most approximately $150. Comparing your ring to the example, would the amount be enough to scrap it?
 
Last edited:

Calliecake

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Jun 7, 2014
Messages
7,359
@pearaffair , I’d keep the ring. You may feel differently about the ring years from now, even if it’s a piece you will never wear.


Thank you for sharing your story @Arcadian . I felt that way about my FIL‘s wedding ring. I could not have loved my FIL more if he’d been my own dad. He died 16 years ago. I’m so grateful I got to have him in my life. There have been a couple days thru the years that holding that ring has brought me a lot of peace.
 

kayla17

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Jan 14, 2003
Messages
2,228
I would think it depends on the relationship you have with one departed.

For myself I would keep it forever. 30+ years and I miss her sometimes like it was yesterday. March and October are the hardest months for me to endure. She wasn't nana or grandma, she was Mother. She really was that 2nd mother to me.

her bible is near the corner of my desk. while I'm not religous, seeing it and sometimes holding it during more stressful times is a comfort. I keep it not because its a bible, but "her bible".
I feel the same way about my grandmother. She is still alive but if I ever had the opportunity to have anything of hers, I would treasure it and never ever get rid of it.
She is back home in the Philippines and I haven’t seen her in a few years so I miss her dearly.
 

kenny

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Apr 30, 2005
Messages
28,987
"Heirloom" is merely another concept that is made up and (sometimes) agreed with.

Pffffft! :rolleyes:

You are free to not agree.
Do whatever you want.
Don't be bullied by made up stuff.
 
Last edited:

TheGarnetGirl

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Apr 13, 2018
Messages
1,466
I would like to say that I would but if I ignore everything I've read and just really put myself in that situation then I think I'd either end up:

A. Gifting it to another female relative immediately but Id need the certainty that she'd love & cherish it, & if there wasn't one....

B. Without hesitation I would either sell for scrap and put the money towards a piece that I adore or send the gold to my jeweler and have them melt it down and use to create something I love. If I did either of these B options I would then name that piece of jewelry after her & Imagine in my head that it was from her.


I wouldn't feel bad about it
She'd want you to be happy, I'd put my money on that.
 
Be a part of the community It's free, join today!
    Reset Heirloom Engagement Ring
    Reset Heirloom Engagement Ring
    Diamond Station Tennis Bracelet
    Diamond Station Tennis Bracelet
    What is PriceScope?
    What is PriceScope?

Need Something Special?

Get a quote from multiple trusted and vetted jewelers.

Holloway Cut Advisor



Diamond Eye Candy

Click to view full-size image.
Top