Would you be offended?

[NovemberBride]

DH and I, along with the rest of my immediate family, are headed out of town in 2 weeks to attend my cousin''s wedding. We will be there for 5 days. Due to the fact that the wedding is in a resort location and it is rather expensive (we also have to fly and rent a car), this is serving as our summer vacation as well as a babymoon (we''re having a baby in Nov.) We will be spending a lot of time with my immediate family, since we do not live near them and they are excited to see us. However, my parents were invited to the rehearsal dinner, so DH and I made reservations for a romantic dinner at a really nice restaurant that night, since it may be one of the last fancy dinners we have for a while. Since we are not taking a separate babymoon due to $ and vacation time, I was really looking forward to this night alone with DH. However, my cousin just decided to invite all the cousins to the rehearsal dinner. Now, if we had initially been invited, I would have just gone to the dinner. However, we were not expecting to be invited and weren''t initially (I know my parents received the invite weeks ago and we just got an email this weekend) and I was really excited for my night alone with DH. We will be seeing everyone at the wedding, would it be terribly rude to say, thanks for the invitation, but we have already made other plan? I don''t want to offend anyone, but I''d really like to have that one night alone with DH.

 

[Allison D.]

I don''t think it would be rude at all to say, "We''re so touched by your thoughtfulness to invite us to the RD, too, but we won''t be able to attend because we''ve made plans for a quiet evening for two together."

 

[honey22]

Date: 8/3/2009 1:45:58 AM
Author: Allison D.
I don''t think it would be rude at all to say, ''We''re so touched by your thoughtfulness to invite us to the RD, too, but we won''t be able to attend because we''ve made plans for a quiet evening for two together.''

Ditto. I am sure they will understand.

 

[Haven]

Date: 8/3/2009 1:47:59 AM
Author: honey22

Date: 8/3/2009 1:45:58 AM
Author: Allison D.
I don''t think it would be rude at all to say, ''We''re so touched by your thoughtfulness to invite us to the RD, too, but we won''t be able to attend because we''ve made plans for a quiet evening for two together.''

Ditto. I am sure they will understand.

Thritto.
Enjoy your evening alone!

 

[Imdanny]

No, it wouldn't be rude. It's not your fault others made last minute plans. Life is short. Do what you want. That's my advice. They'll be glad you came to the wedding, and at your own expense, too. I wouldn't hesitate to follow through on your evening with DH.

 

[mrscushion]

Not rude at all -- just write back a nice note and everyone will be fine.

 

[atroop711]

I don''t think it''s rude at all...just keep your plans and enjoy that one night alone! Congrats on the baby to be

 

[Tuckins1]

Date: 8/3/2009 1:45:58 AM
Author: Allison D.
I don''t think it would be rude at all to say, ''We''re so touched by your thoughtfulness to invite us to the RD, too, but we won''t be able to attend because we''ve made plans for a quiet evening for two together.''

Ditto.

 

[HollyS]

I would (in my mind) assume that I was invited because the cousin had regrets about anyone feeling left out of the festivities.

Unless there is a bridezilla involved, I don''t think bowing out because you had already made other plans will (or should) cause any hard feelings.

And frankly, when you are on guest list B or C for any event, even a bridezilla shouldn''t expect your attendance as though it was mandatory.

 

[vespergirl]

I think it''s totally fine to decline. In fact, whoever is paying for the rehearsal dinner will probably be happy to have two less mouths to feed

 

[ChinaCat]

Nope, I wouldn''t be offended. If I was the bride, and it was really important to me for certain people to attend, I would have made sure I invited them super-early, as she did with your parents.

 

[Lilac]

Date: 8/3/2009 1:45:58 AM
Author: Allison D.
I don''t think it would be rude at all to say, ''We''re so touched by your thoughtfulness to invite us to the RD, too, but we won''t be able to attend because we''ve made plans for a quiet evening for two together.''

I think as long as you phrase it like this it should be fine (unless she''s the type of person to get insulted very easily). It''s totally understandable that you want to spend some time alone with your husband and since you weren''t invited at first, you shouldn''t be expected not to have any other plans.

 

[ckrickett]

I wouldn''t find it rude at all.

 

[KimberlyH]

Not offensive at all. I''d say what Allison suggested.

 

[dragonfly411]

I agree, not rude at all. I like the first wording. Have fun