Why I always want more?

[stci]

Hi friends!

I'm so upset because I'm not able to be reasonable.

DH and I work hard for the money and we are not rich. In spite of that, I have a heart diamond pendant, a 1.42 ct diamond ring, a diamond bracelet, .70 ct diamond studs and 2 other beautiful right hand rings.

I always want more... I hate think like that! Sometime I think I'm a snob about jewelry and I don't want to be like that!!!

How can I solve the problem? Do you have tricks or idea to help me?

 

[Asscherhalo_lover]

All I can really say is don't feel too bad, I'm always saving up for another project! I think of it as my hobby, my husband likes cars and electronics and I like jewelry. I think it's fun to be planning for/saving up for the next project!

 

[Dancing Fire]

Hi friends!

I'm so upset because I'm not able to be reasonable.

DH and I work hard for the money and we are not rich. In spite of that, I have a heart diamond pendant, a 1.42 ct diamond ring, a diamond bracelet, .70 ct diamond studs and 2 other beautiful right hand rings.

I always want more... I hate think like that! Sometime I think I'm a snob about jewelry and I don't want to be like that!!!

How can I solve the problem? Do you have tricks or idea to help me?

find a rich "sugar daddy" ??...

 

[kenny]

I think becoming a Buddhist monk or dying are the only cures for wanting more.

 

[ang3199]

Hi Stci! Sometimes, if I begin to want 'more'....either a bigger rock, a nicer handbag, or a pair of Loubs. I like to stop and think about the things I ALREADY have. I like to think about the amount of money DH and I have been able to bank away and that makes me happy to see that number growing.

I feel your pain though! Just focus on the beauties you already have!

 

[Imdanny]

Well, it's not easy. I can only tell you what I did. I made a list. Things that were on the list are things I decided to have. Things that were not on the list are things I decided to live without. There is an ever expanding universe of possibilities, I can see, if someone were to drop lottery winnings on me, but it would be bad for and my loved ones not to draw a line. As the cliche goes, "You have to draw the line somewhere." Well, that's what I did.

 

[Indylady]

How about getting rid of pieces that you don't wear to fund future projects?

So instead of adding on, switch out old pieces for new ones. Would you be willing?

 

[yssie]

Someone on here has/had this tagline, I wish I could remember who:

being happy is wanting what you have


That's so true, and so perfectly stated! Easier said than done sometimes, though..

 

[Miss Sparkly]

The unhappiness comes from within and for some reason you're needing more. Look at what you have and what you want. Do you want a larger varity, or maybe a larger stone, or a nicer stone? Now WHY do you want them? To make yourself happy, because you're worried that a princess diamond has greener grass then a heart diamond, to impress others or another reason? Picture yourself owning that piece. How long will it make you happy for? After you own it, what would be next on your list and why? You're whole world, and diamonds, will look a lot brighter once you can uncover the root to your unhappiness.

 

[Kaleigh]

Hi friends!

I'm so upset because I'm not able to be reasonable.

DH and I work hard for the money and we are not rich. In spite of that, I have a heart diamond pendant, a 1.42 ct diamond ring, a diamond bracelet, .70 ct diamond studs and 2 other beautiful right hand rings.

I always want more... I hate think like that! Sometime I think I'm a snob about jewelry and I don't want to be like that!!!

How can I solve the problem? Do you have tricks or idea to help me?

Oh so many of us have been in your place. You have some lovely pieces.. Enjoy them. If it's really getting to you, take a break from PS.. If you are coming here, and wanting more and more, then you need to stop...And look within...

If it's any help, I was like this, but now I want nothing.. I have enough, and love what I have..

 

[stci]

Hi friends!

I'm so upset because I'm not able to be reasonable.

DH and I work hard for the money and we are not rich. In spite of that, I have a heart diamond pendant, a 1.42 ct diamond ring, a diamond bracelet, .70 ct diamond studs and 2 other beautiful right hand rings.

I always want more... I hate think like that! Sometime I think I'm a snob about jewelry and I don't want to be like that!!!

How can I solve the problem? Do you have tricks or idea to help me?

Oh so many of us have been in your place. You have some lovely pieces.. Enjoy them. If it's really getting to you, take a break from PS.. If you are coming here, and wanting more and more, then you need to stop...And look within...

If it's any help, I was like this, but now I want nothing.. I have enough, and love what I have..

I work on that but it's sooooo difficult! So many beauties to see here!

Making a list seem a good idea!

Just focus on the beauties you already have!

I try and I try but fail...

I think becoming a Buddhist monk or dying are the only cures for wanting more.

LOL I hope I can find something who help me to stop wanting more before I die!

Anyway, I'm happy to see I'm not alone!

 

[Madam Bijoux]

As a collector, I say give in to it and keep getting more. Life is too short to deny yourself the things you want. First be sure that your necessities are taken care of, then indulge yoyrself.

 

[gemgirl]

Hi friends!

I'm so upset because I'm not able to be reasonable.

DH and I work hard for the money and we are not rich. In spite of that, I have a heart diamond pendant, a 1.42 ct diamond ring, a diamond bracelet, .70 ct diamond studs and 2 other beautiful right hand rings.

I always want more... I hate think like that! Sometime I think I'm a snob about jewelry and I don't want to be like that!!!

How can I solve the problem? Do you have tricks or idea to help me?

I think that just like with any other hobby, being reasonable is a place you have to get yourself to. You have to look at your finances and decide for yourself, what is reasonable to achieve with your budget. I'd love to have a 2.5 ct. G VS2 Ideal cut round, but that's never going to happen for me. So reasonably speaking, many years ago I made myself a list of the things I'd like to own someday, and I told my husband about it too. Then one by one, I saved for those things. Like Madam B said, our necessities come first. I pay all of my bills on time, tuck away something for a rainy day that never gets touched, and then I allow myself some "play" money that gets accumulated until I have enough to buy something or do a project.

If all of that fails, then I'd have to agree with Kaleigh. Detach yourself from PS for a short while and reset your priorities. Hanging out here is never going to help you become more reasonable! I've turned it around too, I guess like a lot of us have. I look at my little treasure chest of goodies and think "I don't know how I did it, but damn I'm lucky to have what I have". And that's enough for me.

 

[diamondringlover]

I feel your pain I do this as well, I try to think WHY...I have enough why do I want more....I dont know the answer but I just try to keep from buying more....I just cant afford it

 

[soocool]

I don't know if it is a sign of getting older or what, but DH and I have been finding ourselves saying when we see something we want:

1. Do we really need it?

2. Where will we put it?

3. Let's sleep on it

4. Then we forget about it completely......definitely a sign we are getting older!!

 

[gemgirl]

I feel your pain I do this as well, I try to think WHY...I have enough why do I want more....I dont know the answer but I just try to keep from buying more....I just cant afford it

I asked myself the "why" question at the beginning of my collection, and the why for me was because I started to treat diamond jewelry like any other fashion accessory. Then I finally realized that I couldn't keep doing this forever, at least not at the pace that I used to.

 

[Haven]

I would ask myself these questions:
- What do I feel each time I acquire a new piece?
- How long does the feeling last?

I could be very far off, but it sounds like you are not happy with what you have, even though you have several beautiful pieces, so maybe it's not owning the pieces that makes you feel good, but some rush of acquiring that makes you feel good.

If that's the case, I'd say you could probably replace the rush you get when you acquire a new piece with some other endeavor that doesn't have to cost as much, AND that could help enrich your life in some way. (In other words, get a hobby! )

Seriously, though, DH and often joke that we see an inverse relationship between the amount of things people have, and the amount of genuine interests they have. Of course, that is a huge generalization, and I think it may have a lot to do with where we live, but it's what we've observed.

 

[JewelFreak]

I think becoming a Buddhist monk or dying are the only cures for wanting more.

Oh Kenny, I get such a kick out of you! You hit the nail on the head.

Wanting is part of the enjoyment of not having, if that makes sense. Picture if you had all the money in the world & could buy ANYTHING at any time. It would lose all value to you. When I roam the Sotheby's jewelry auction catalogs I want some things so badly I can feel it physically -- knowing I'll never have it. I want a Whistler painting just as much, but no cigar. So I keep a file on my computer with photos of fabulous pieces or stones that make me drool with greed; looking at them still gives me lots of pleasure, even though I'll never own them.

Go through your stuff & offload things you don't use much. (I'm gonna do that at Christmas on eBay.) Put that money with a little more for something you really want. Rather than buying a bunch of lesser things, I want to buy one item that knocks my socks off, the best I can afford. Then when I see other equally beautiful stuff, I can tell myself, "Yeah, but I have this." No matter what you have, there'll always be something else -- we can make ourselves miserable over it or keep it in perspective.

--- Laurie

 

[Nashville]

I'll echo what others have said here, I realized very quickly that the appeal of new items is only fun when I can't have them!

 

[decodelighted]

There was an article recently ... The NY TImes maybe?? Can't remember!! It was about happiness & how people are happier with things that they anticipated for a LONG TIME. Much happier than they are with things that they bought spontaneously. The ANTICIPATION is 85% of the pleasure. With jewelry, with vacations etc.

The article also discussed how people are generally happier when they spend $$ on *experiences* rather than things. Someone will always have a faster car or bigger ring etc ... but no one will take the exact same trip to Italy. Yanno?

One last thing in the article was there was a filmmaker who was making the documentary about happiness == who, in the process of making the film, decided to give up his stylish San Fran pad to live in A TRAILER IN MALIBU. Why? To be by the beach & be able to surf 3-4 times a week. Something he loves & he wasn't able to do frequently when he lived in a city. He says he's much, much happier now -- even living with much less in a less comfie home.

Anyhoo .. maybe some of that will be food for thought.

 

[tyty333]

I've found myself wanting to do projects without a budget to cover it...so I am turning to some of the artist on Etsy and
looking at sterling silver and gem stones (cheap affordable ones) to get my "high". That way I get to design something
but have it carried out by someone who knows what they are doing (hopefully). I'm currently having a pendant made.
I borrowed/stole the design from another PSer because her's turned out so lovely.

It doesnt stop me from wanting "more" but it makes the "more" a little more affordable.

 

[lknvrb4]

I am very simple with my jewelry. I wear the same studs everyday, same necklace, ering, and most days I don't wear anything on my right hand. I will never be one with a lot of jewelry pieces but I have two wants left on my list and waiting to afford them is driving me nuts. I want things immediately, I hate waiting.

 

[SeattleSweetheart]

Whenever I want more jewelry, I know it's time to clean out my jewelry box. I take out all my jewelry (most of my jewelry is sterling so it needs to be cleaned regularly) and clean each ring, each necklace, each earring. By the time I've cleaned all my jewelry, tried it all on, and remembered why I love what I have, the impulse to buy something more, something new is greatly lessened. When I want a new handbag, I do the same thing with my handbags.

I know intellectually that my money is doing me more good in the bank than on my body, but I agree with you, sometimes it is really hard to not want to spend it on something sparkly.

 

[Arkteia]

I think I have a form of OCD that has something to do with collecting. I collected clothes, book, now stones. I thought I could "downsize" and donated the ones that I was not wearing but now, again, my jewelry boxes are almost full. And I am yet in "colored stones", not "diamonds" group! I think Harriet's advice not to purchase to scratch an itch and to buy one higher-carat stone rather that five smaller ones is a very good one but I have to stick it across my computer screen to adhere to it, if only partially.

 

[Dreamer_D]

I found that the insatiable wanting existed when I was not happy with what I had. Instead of focusing on other projects, I thought about what I really wanted, and then when it was identified I saved and got that thing. Now that I have it, I don't feel the same insatiable need! I enjoy thinking about my diamond and how I will set it in a few years, but it is not the same burning desire.

And we have not spare money right now because we have bigger fish to fry. That helped too

 

[Amethyste]

Stci,

I am going to be honest with you here... I think you will stop wanting more when you have found "The One".
I think Jewelry is very much so like finding the perfect life companion and want to marry him and live together. A diamond/ring is very much like a life long relationship.

When I finally got mine - I literally stopped wanting to get more. I was finally happy.