Some guys'' views on engagement vs. wedding

[ellaila]

There have been four weddings in the past month in my office (including mine

) so obviously there''s been wedding talk up the wazoo!

And one of the coolest things for me has been seeing how the guys are now that they''re newlyweds -- they''re all giddy and lovestruck! So cute! One said to me, "Now I know how you and [his new wife] have felt since the engagement -- it really does change once you put a ring on your finger!" And two have told me how different they feel now that they are married -- different for the better! And I know my hubby is the same way. It''s like the engagement is just symbolic to them, but the wedding ... now THAT''s real!!

And it''s funny because, though I obviously love being a newlywed and being married, I guess maybe I''m just more used to it since I''ve felt that feeling of "Wow, we''re moving to the next level!" since the engagement -- whereas this seems more new for the guys. It just makes me laugh to see these guys that a few months ago were like, "Agh, our lives are consumed by this wedding! Grr, grr, grr!" are now these big lovey-dovey mushballs who keep staring at their rings! (Which, of course I do too, but I''ve been doing it for six months now since getting engaged

) I guess that band of gold (or platinum or titanium or whatever) on the ring finger really is the closest pathway to the heart!

Anyway, I just wanted to share because I think it''s just so cute. And to all you BIW who are getting frustrated with your fiances for not being into the wedding planning ... you just wait!

(And I''m not generalizing ALL guys here -- I know that some guys are into the wedding planning and the engagement period -- I''m just talking about ones I know personally, so please no flaming!)

 

[SoonIHope]

Hehehe, so cute!

My fiance is pretty good about general excitement levels now, but he toooootally drags his feet on things like looking at invitations, and gets scared off by money issues (which I do too - but that isn''t the ONLY thing I think about the wedding!!), so I hope he gets more mushy after the fact!! And mainly I hope that he actually likes wearing his ring; he promised to wear it for a minimum of 1 year but thinks he''ll hate it and get annoyed so he''ll want to take it off the second he can, which makes me sooooo sad, but hopefully once he''s worn it a bit, he''ll get used to it and actually LIKE having it there!

 

[fisherofmengirly]

That is super cute!

Paul''s brother teases him for referring to me as his fiancee or *almost wife* more often than by any other term these days. I think it''s just precious and I can''t wait for the reaction he has once it''s a real deal!!

 

[ellaila]

Date: 10/18/2006 11:04:52 AM
Author: albicocca
Hehehe, so cute!

My fiance is pretty good about general excitement levels now, but he toooootally drags his feet on things like looking at invitations, and gets scared off by money issues (which I do too - but that isn''t the ONLY thing I think about the wedding!!), so I hope he gets more mushy after the fact!! And mainly I hope that he actually likes wearing his ring; he promised to wear it for a minimum of 1 year but thinks he''ll hate it and get annoyed so he''ll want to take it off the second he can, which makes me sooooo sad, but hopefully once he''s worn it a bit, he''ll get used to it and actually LIKE having it there!

Albi, my hubby was not a jewelry guy at all, and he loves wearing his ring! He even gets that "I feel naked without it!" feeling if he takes it off to go to the gym or something.

I personally think there''s nothing sweeter than seeing a guy wearing a wedding ring -- and I''ve felt this way long before marriage was even an inkling in my mind -- I just love that he is putting it out there that he is in love and he''s committed to his spouse/partner!

 

[SoonIHope]

ellaila - THAT''s what I''m saying!!! And I am totally copy-pasting your post to my fiance right now.

 

[TravelingGal]

I actually catch TGuy (my new moniker for him on this board) staring at his ring too. Yesterday was his first day back at work and I get this frantic phone message that he left his ring at home by accident and did not do it on purpose. As if he was scared that I would think our marriage is in jeopardy or something!

Saw him off this morning and the ring was there.

I would agree that the engagement seems to hit harder for the woman in most cases. TGuy hardly ever called me his fiancee, but he seems to love calling me his wife...or "whiffy".

 

[mopsie]

I noticed on one of your previous posts that you were planning a wedding at Castle Hill... I''m about to sign the contract for a wedding there, and I was wondering if you have any do''s and dont''s that may be worth knowing BEFORE signing $50,000 away! (We''re planning a 200-person wedding for June 200. Sorry to post this way, but I can''t seem to find a way to contact you directly! So anyway, do you have any regrets, or is Castle Hill as amazing as it looks? Thanks!!!

 

[KimberlyH]

Hubby tells me he is a much happier person now that he''s married because I''m now a permanent fixture in his life. He''s pretty reserved so he never got extremely enthusiastic about wedding planning, the real excitement about being married didn''t show up until we''d said "I do." We didn''t live together until we were married and now he gets upset (in an endearing way) if I''m not in bed with him every night. He was snoring one night so I went into the spare bedroom and he actually came looking for me at 3 a.m. because he woke up and was sad that "his lump", as he refers to me when I''m sleeping, wasn''t there. Way too cute.

He works with his hands a lot so he doesn''t always wear his ring, but he freaks if we go to dinner or something and he''s forgotten to put it on. He''s actually turned around and gone back to get it. It cracks me up. I tease him that he''s pretending to be single when he doesn''t have it on. I told him I was okay with him not wearing his ring if he didn''t like it (comfort, etc.) but he is adament. Too cute.

 

[ChargerGrrl]

DH forgot his ring at home the other day and mentioned that he totally felt "naked" without it. He wears his more than I do mine (i'm a "take the jewelry off when I get home kind of gal").

He NEVER called me his FI, but LOVES calling me his wife.

Married life is great. I don't want "the honeymoon" to end!

 

[poptart]

Albi, the ring will probably grow on him. My DH also was not a jewelry person, but he now only takes his ring off to shower, and that''s all. They are so funny, aren''t they? It''s like emotional overload. The funniest thing I thought he did after we got married was that he changed my name in his phone from "Marisa", to "Your wife Marisa"... which I thought was cute but funny at the same time. Mine enjoyes calling me his wife as well, I also hope the honeymoon stage never ends!!

Marisa

 

[ellaila]

Date: 10/26/2006 12:16:23 PM
Author: mopsie
I noticed on one of your previous posts that you were planning a wedding at Castle Hill... I''m about to sign the contract for a wedding there, and I was wondering if you have any do''s and dont''s that may be worth knowing BEFORE signing $50,000 away! (We''re planning a 200-person wedding for June 200. Sorry to post this way, but I can''t seem to find a way to contact you directly! So anyway, do you have any regrets, or is Castle Hill as amazing as it looks? Thanks!!!

Oh yay!!! Castle Hill IS as amazing as it looks!!! I LOVE that place!

We had nothing but great experiences from day one to the wedding day. Castle Hill is elegant but not stuff; professional yet friendly. It definitely gives that WOW factor, the food is fantastic, the location is just gorgeous ... can you tell I loved our wedding?

We had a very small wedding (fewer than 40 total), so we just used the Ocean Room for our dining reception (no dancing or anything) -- I assume for 200 guests, you''re using the Chalet? Unfortunately, because ours was considered more of a "private dining" than a "wedding," I can''t really tell you many do''s and don''ts about how to go about it, but I can tell you that our wedding was *perfect* and that was in large part because of the amazing staff at Castle Hill!

Good luck, mopsie!! Oh, and you MUST stay there for a night or two! We stayed in a beach cottage, and it was awesome

 

[Rosebud8506]

My DH was so funny, when we were on our honeymoon in Hawaii, he was in the water and the tides were really rough one day, and I saw him (I was on the beach) from afar, and he kept holding his hand out and checking his ring. I asked him when he returned to our beach spot what he was looking at, at he said, "I wanted to make sure it doesn''t get too scratched up! I don''t like seeing it scratched!". His ring is platinum and for sure it''s gonna get scratched - it can be buffed out, and he knows that, but I thought it was cute he was being conscious of it...

Oh and, he still continues to examine it for scratches, even 3 months later - so funny!