Ring Shopping was disappointing

[Guilty Pleasure]

My bf asked last weekend if I''d like to go ring shopping this weekend. You bet I do!

I was really excited about it, and even more excited that it was his suggestion. Then the hurricane came, and he had to go to El Paso, and I left town as well, so we spent the weekend in different cities. We both got back into town on Sunday, and even though we were wearing work out clothes, he still wanted to go. I was really happy that he was actually pushing for it! But all the stores were closed as expected.

Anyway, he took me as soon as we came home from work yesterday. We went to two stores. It was disappointing!!! I am so spoiled by pricescope with all the options on these forums and access to hundreds of different rings. The stores had so few rings, only two types of diamonds, and one of the stores had a very annoying lady who spent so much time trying to find out what BF''s budget was, and telling me things like "oh a cushion is only good if it''s over 1.5 carats, so you probably want to stick to the round or princess"... I know she was only saying that because she was trying to push her inventory and make it easier on her. Anyway, I just wanted to try on different settings, and see different shapes of diamonds on my hands, and the lack of selection coupled with the annoying know it all lady was disheartening. I still haven''t seen a cushion in person

Anyone else feel that way after ring shopping? Afterwards, I asked him how he felt about buying a ring online, and he said that would be fine. I told him I felt like we would have more options and not feel so hassled.

At least my boyfriend is wonderful and took me shopping which tells me that he is ready to move forward from the "talking about marriage stage". He said things like, "She''s the boss" to the sales person or "I do want to do it myself, but I want to find out what you like" So I''m definitely not complaining about the fact that we went ring shopping because it means that we are one step closer to being married

 

[Italiahaircolor]

First of all, I think it is very responsible of any jeweler to investigate what your budget is. Sure, it''s an uncomfortable question....since you were just looking you probably hated being put on the spot like that. But, this jeweler probably just wanted to introduce you to realistic rings you can afford to fall in love with...and not some monster that you''ll adore, but is completely over the ammount you can spend...and really, what''s the harm in that? I''m sure her sales tactics weren''t the best, but I still don''t think, in general, it''s a bad thing.

Did you visit BM, Independants, or Chain Stores? That will have huge influence over the diamonds you get to see and try on. An independant jeweller can easily locate the stone of your dreams, or various stones of your dreams for you with little to no problem. Chain stores tend to be more difficult, they usually don''t have shapes like an assher, cushion, or even oval.

Sorry your experience wasn''t perfect...but, at least you''ve cracked the egg....

 

[trillionaire]

I went to 5 or 6 stores one day, and never saw a trillion

Most stores said they could call one in in 2-3 business days, but I wasn''t really interested. Jared had the largest selection of settings for a B&M store that I saw. It could be a decent place to look for setting ideas. I think they pretty much carry the standard rounds and princesses though. Good luck with your search, sorry it started on the wrong foot!

 

[neatfreak]

Date: 9/16/2008 11:12:22 AM
Author: trillionaire
I went to 5 or 6 stores one day, and never saw a trillion

Most stores said they could call one in in 2-3 business days, but I wasn''t really interested. Jared had the largest selection of settings for a B&M store that I saw. It could be a decent place to look for setting ideas. I think they pretty much carry the standard rounds and princesses though. Good luck with your search, sorry it started on the wrong foot!

You know that''s funny, because I was just going to recommend Jared''s for BROWSING ONLY as they were one of the only places around that had other shapes besides princess and rounds. Now they weren''t particularly well cut or nice cushions...but at least they had them!

Also, take a look at the colored stones. Those often can give you setting ideas and are very often cushion shaped stones too. Not the same as seeing a cushion diamond, but at least nice for setting ideas...

 

[Inanna]

I can definitely relate. Over about 5 months, my boyfriend and I visited about 12 or 13 different stores, both chain and independent (my boyfriend was quite opposed to online shopping, unfortunately). I found that the independent stores are much more willing to order in specific stones and generally have a more unique selection... they also are more likely to do custom jewelry design on site. I was utterly disgusted with many of the chain stores, including Jared, Hannoush, and Samuel''s - I''m not saying that they''re all bad, but we found the salespeople rude and the selection incredibly generic in our particular area. Also, keep in mind that most of the chains are simply jewelry stores, not actual jewelers - they aren''t generally as educated and have to send jewelry off-site to be worked on.

Keep looking and I''m sure you''ll find a jeweler that suits both of your tastes. It''s also great that you have the option of online shopping! Good luck!

 

[Guilty Pleasure]

Italia, I agree that asking a budget is an important question, but I gave her an amount to work with, told her that I was simply trying to see different types of shapes and different styles of settings on my hand that day, and wanted to leave it at that. It was frustrating having a person be so pushy in the direction of choosing between five settings in either a round or princess simply because that's what she had and wanted to make a sale that day.


Anyways, what I was disappointed about was just not having much to look at. I really wanted to see a variety of styles or diamond shapes to narrow down my desires and saw that it wasn't as easy as just going into a jewelry store and saying, "please show me the engagement rings"

I did go to an actual jeweler (not the pushy lady store which was a chain), and they were very nice. They seemed interested in finding out what we wanted, and they weren't pushing toward a generic purchase. However, they were small and didn't have much in store and were showing me a catalogue. It was nice to have their help and guidance, but the whole reason we went ring shopping was to see the rings! I can look at catalogue pictures online or on pricescope

Of course it makes sense for the chain store to keep the inventory that they think sells the most and to "always be closing" toward an easy sale. It doesn't mean I can't be disappointed!


I am happy to "crack the egg" as you guys said, and very happy with my boyfriend. This was just the wake-up call that getting the perfect ring is going to take some legwork! IT will be fun though... I think!

 

[musey]

I experienced the same frustration in our early ring-shopping days. We went into one store and asked to see and asscher, and the salesguy pulled out an emerald. I explained that asschers are square, and he said oh, sorry, hold on... and pulled out a princess.

Ummm......

It got a little frustrating when I started to realize that, even with my limited jewelry knowledge, I knew a heck of a lot more than these salespeople. Yeesh. The most "fancy" of cuts I found was emerald, until I went to the diamond district in downtown LA. Then, pretty much all I saw were K-O stones with big clouds in ''em.

Anyway, we finally felt our way through the stores in our area, and ended up finding better stuff to look at. In my opinion, though, ring shopping never ends up beign quite as fun as one expects it to be

 

[vita*dolce]

actually i did feel that way!! you should visit the websites of the designers you like and find out which local vendors carry those styles so that you might have some more success!!

good luck!

 

[Guilty Pleasure]

Date: 9/16/2008 3:13:55 PM
Author: vita*dolce
actually i did feel that way!! you should visit the websites of the designers you like and find out which local vendors carry those styles so that you might have some more success!!

good luck!

That''s a good tip

Now that the BF has started the process and said that yes it is perfectly fine for me to do some research, I can start doing some real searching and hopefully have a better idea of what I want and where to find it.

I tried to stay away from the details before or any serious research other than admiring pictures of rings on here because I didn''t want him to feel like I was pushing towards engagement or a particular ring. But since he asked...

 

[jaylex]

bf and i have gone to look at rings and I agree that the stores don''t have a wide selection. At one store, the only diamond that we saw that was an Si1 clarity was a non-certified one carat for almost $10,000! I don''t think so! And we didn''t have much luck elsewhere. That is why we have decided to purchase online.
But we don''t want to get screwed over so we are making sure to take our time. It also helps that we don''t have a pushy sales lady following us around (I understand it''s her job. I''m just kidding). But Seriously, he doesn''t like being pressured when making big decisions like that because he feels like he may make the wrong one and end up with buyers remorse. So for us, online def seems to be the way to go.

happy hunting!

 

[princess_natalie]

Date: 9/16/2008 3:13:55 PM
Author: vita*dolce
actually i did feel that way!! you should visit the websites of the designers you like and find out which local vendors carry those styles so that you might have some more success!!


good luck!

She''s got a great point!

That''s my plan.. I have been drooling over Scott Kay so we used the site to search for a dealer close by and this weekend we''re going to go visit them.

In a way it seems like a bit of a chase to go from store to store but I mean, it''s an engagement ring - its worth it

 

[LaraOnline]

Date: 9/16/2008 10:14:50 AM
Author: Italiahaircolor
First of all, I think it is very responsible of any jeweler to investigate what your budget is. Sure, it''s an uncomfortable question....since you were just looking you probably hated being put on the spot like that. But, this jeweler probably just wanted to introduce you to realistic rings you can afford to fall in love with...and not some monster that you''ll adore, but is completely over the ammount you can spend...and really, what''s the harm in that? I''m sure her sales tactics weren''t the best, but I still don''t think, in general, it''s a bad thing.

I think that''s a very important point, Italia. I guess the OP could always guide the saleslady (on any future shopping trips!) by replying: "oh, I was interested in around .75 carat", or some such. That way, the lady gets the information she needs for an entry point in her presentation.

 

[vita*dolce]

hey, guilty pleasure!! how''s the ring shopping going?? do you have any updates??

 

[Guilty Pleasure]

Lara, I did tell the saleslady that his budget was 10,000 dollars for the ring (not really that high, but we hadn't decided yet since this was an info only day) and that I was interested in seeing a variety of shapes and sizes and styles of settings because I was starting at square one and really didn't know my preferences yet. I don't know if I want a carat or a half carat or one and half carat... I havent seen them in person yet! I felt like that was enough information to get the ball rolling on seeing the options, but she just wasn't very helpful AND the store didn't have that many optiions anyway. I felt like she expected me to already know exactly what I wanted so she could get to the business of purchasing the ring, but the one thing I asked specifically for (cushion cut), she sort of insulted because she didn't have it in the store. I mean, why is she asking about specific financing options when we haven't even seen a ring yet? I can't really explain it more than that, and it doesn't matter because I am not going to buy a ring from her anyway. oh well!

Vita, thanks for asking! That is sweet of you

I haven't made any progress really this week. I change my mind daily. Two days ago, I was in love with Beverly K, but last night, I thought maybe I'd like something really really plain instead. It's so hard for me to get an opinion based off the internet. Things are so big on the screen that you can't tell if something is delicate or if something that bothers you wouldn't actually even be noticeable on your hand. Once I figure out how to post pictures, I'll post some pics of rings I like!

 

[Guilty Pleasure]

Here's the Beverly K setting I like.

Things I love about it:

milgrain edges
scrolly cut out parts
low profile
carving
double prongs
cushion shape (I think even if I bought a round diamond, I would like a squarish setting)
It's intricate without looking too much like a cocktail ring instead of an engagement ring

I don't know yet if I want white or yellow. I don't know yet which shape I want. I don't know what size looks right on my hand (to me). I don't have a preference for halo or no halo. I really dislike the "classic Tiffany setting" look for me, because the diamond seems to stick out too much from the ring, and I think that would bother me... so anything that has the prongs sticking straight out from the ring in a V shape is out. It's too bad because they are beautiful on other people.

 

[Guilty Pleasure]

I also like the Vatche engraved X prong. It's a less blingy ring, but still has a little bit of old school character with the engraving. I like that it's a simple form with intricate detail when you look closer.

I also think just a plain thin gold setting with no engraving, extra diamonds or embellishments might be nice... let that diamond shine!

so you see that I have a lot to decide still!

PS - the web site for vatche rings is NOT vatche.com! hehe.

 

[LaraOnline]

Date: 9/19/2008 5:20:23 PM
Author: Guilty Pleasure
Lara, I did tell the saleslady that his budget was 10,000 dollars for the ring (not really that high, but we hadn''t decided yet since this was an info only day) and that I was interested in seeing a variety of shapes and sizes and styles of settings because I was starting at square one and really didn''t know my preferences yet. I don''t know if I want a carat or a half carat or one and half carat... I havent seen them in person yet! I felt like that was enough information to get the ball rolling on seeing the options, but she just wasn''t very helpful AND the store didn''t have that many optiions anyway. I felt like she expected me to already know exactly what I wanted so she could get to the business of purchasing the ring, but the one thing I asked specifically for (cushion cut), she sort of insulted because she didn''t have it in the store. I mean, why is she asking about specific financing options when we haven''t even seen a ring yet? I can''t really explain it more than that, and it doesn''t matter because I am not going to buy a ring from her anyway. oh well!

I''m sorry if you thought I was critical of your approach. I agree that it is uncomfortable to discuss budget - particularly when you are just starting shopping, and have no idea of what your money will bring you! I would be loath to cut off my options by providing a budget prematurely. And how awful for you, that she would intimate that cushions must be huge (and therefore out of the nominated 10,000 budget) and so not ''available'' to you.
I say go guerilla, and make up a ''mystery friend'' who has a beautiful cushion at whatever carat weight you desire to look at. Then she must admit she has no stock. I hate being intimidated by lazy shop assistants!

I had the most wonderful diamond shopping experience yesterday. At a loose end in the city yesterday with no kids(for the first time in some years) I found myself out the front of an upmarket diamond merchants. I was nicely dressed, and went in. They were absolutely lovely to me.
I explained that I had been excited about a possible upgrade for next year''s anniversary, but that we had just bought a house instead, and so an upgrade was out of the question. However, could I look...?
They couldn''t help me enough, I tried on $25,000 diamonds in temporary settings, while the sales ladies oohed and aahed and smiled their faces off.
Great service!

 

[Guilty Pleasure]

Lara, I didn''t think you were being critical of me at all. I was just responding and giving more information to describe what I meant. Since I notice you posting on the same threads as me, I''ll go ahead and say now - don''t ever worry about me taking your posts the wrong way! I will especially give you the benefit of the doubt since you always seem to have caring things to say to people. If you have a choice of reading my tone as being defensive or conversational, then go with the conversational because it''s hard to offend me and I just enjoy talking to people!


How fun for you to just get to play

That''s sort of what I would have liked on my first day... but I found out that a chain jewelry store in Corpus Christi, TX is not really an ideal playground

I''ll just have to wait until I go back to my hometown (Houston) for a visit with the family before I can really see a variety in person.

 

[LaraOnline]

Aw shucks Guilty Pleasure, thanks for the comments.

Yes, a diamond merchant is exactly what you need. They are more likely to have a variety of carat weights and grades, and will have the grades more clearly marked. Also, the sales assistants are probably more likely to be knowledgeable about the diamonds. I found it very interesting to look at beautifully cut diamonds up close.

Admittedly I come from Australia, where generally women don't wear such large diamonds, and I think after looking at the diamonds yesterday, I will be happy with a 1 carat diamond. (especially if I choose an upgradeable diamond if my tastes change in old age lol)

I mean, there is always room for more, I guess that's why some ladies lust after 3 c, but the 1 carat size (RB) seemed for me to be very tasteful and easy to wear... and not much different va-voom wise from my conceptual holy grail 1.2. Seeing them IRL is definitely educational!