ring, no girl

[dmbfan]

Ok so I have a ring and want to get an idea on what to do with it. I had bought this about a year ago and it didn''t work out. my ex saw the ring, and I would not want to give it to anyone else. so here is my dilema, I really like the diamond and ring that I bought.

here is some of the info on the center stone, its a three stone setting with the TCW 1.24. Platinum setting

Shape and Cut: Round Brilliant
Weight: 0.720 ct
Diameter (mm) 5.85
Crown height: 15.5%
Crown Angle 35.1
Pavil Angle 40.4
Pavil Depth 41.6
Culet .3
Table Size 56.9
Proporsion Ex.Ideal
Symmetry Verry Good
Polish Very Good
Clarity SI1
Color H
Flourescence Faint

All this info came with the ring with an I.G.L. lab report, I have looked into this and I know its not one of the mayor certification. I would love to have the diamond certified by another lab. From what I have been able to learn this is a very good diamond for what I paid and I got very lucky when I bought this. Let me know any input you may have.

I would probably make the side stones into earings

TIA

 

[JulieN]

why do you want a major lab report?

 

[dmbfan]

I don''t need one I guess, but if I understand correctly it would be nice to have for insurance. I''m learning, do you think its not necessary?

 

[tdiggity]

I''d just get a safe box and leave it there. When the time comes, you can put it in a new setting for your future wife. I think as long as you put it in a new ring it will still be special.

 

[diamondseeker2006]

Date: 10/31/2006 6:03:22 PM
Author: dmbfan
I don''t need one I guess, but if I understand correctly it would be nice to have for insurance. I''m learning, do you think its not necessary?

You don''t need it for insurance. The only reason I can think of for getting one would be if you wanted to sell the ring. But that would require removing the stone from the setting. If you don''t want to use it for an engagement ring, then it would make a nice pendant and earrings for your future wife. But if all association with this ring is bad, then I''d probably go back to the original jeweler and ask if you could trade it in.

 

[flopkins]

I''d remake it into a pendant and earrings set for your future wife, or as future gifts for a special sister or something like that.

 

[Olive Oil]

Hmmm....I may be being an unreasonable woman, but I don''t like the suggestion of resetting it and giving it to another woman should the occasion arise. I know, it''s completely illogical, but if I was given a stone that was chosen for someone else, I would feel a little sad. For some women, the stone has a great deal of sentimental value (more so than the setting), and it may feel like "Well hey, she didn''t want it so I guess you''ll do." I would prefer a stone that was chosen with me in mind. If you want to keep it, I would reset it and give it to your mother/sister/daughter. And again, I know it''s a little silly, so don''t attack me!

 

[mrssalvo]

Date: 10/31/2006 10:38:50 PM
Author: Olive Oil
Hmmm....I may be being an unreasonable woman, but I don''t like the suggestion of resetting it and giving it to another woman should the occasion arise. I know, it''s completely illogical, but if I was given a stone that was chosen for someone else, I would feel a little sad. For some women, the stone has a great deal of sentimental value (more so than the setting), and it may feel like ''Well hey, she didn''t want it so I guess you''ll do.'' I would prefer a stone that was chosen with me in mind. If you want to keep it, I would reset it and give it to your mother/sister/daughter. And again, I know it''s a little silly, so don''t attack me!

you''re not silly at all. I would feel the same way. I wouldn''t mind if he traded it toward a new diamond though..

 

[Siamese Kitty]

ditto Olive Oil and mrssalvo! It would make a beautiful bday present for your mom for some milestone bday, but I think it might just be better to trade it in. If she/your sister were a part of the process they may feel weird about the stones, too. Sorry to hear about this-hang in there.

 

[reader]

Why not resetting it into something you will enjoy? You put the work and the money into the stones, may as well enjoy them.

 

[WTNLVR]

If your ex only saw the ring and never wore it, I would have no problem getting it as a reset. If she did wear it, I wouldn''t have an issue wearing it as a pendant/earrings. I would never pass up a gift of diamonds. I recently bought some jewelry off someone with a failed engagement. Not quite the same, but a bargain is a bargain. I don''t believe in bad carma, etc... I would just ask your future intended how she feels, and that will be your answer. You are better off holding onto them though, as you''ll never get close to what you paid for them. You could set the main stone into a mans ring as well. Or, if you just want to get rid of them, gift them to family or see if one of them wants to buy it off you for a bargain. You may be surprised at the takers.

 

[tdiggity]

I guess I struggle with the idea of people having a problem with the rock being for a failed engagement. Ladies do you honestly believe we find a rock and think "hmm this one reminds me of her"? You are entitled to your own opinion and that is fine, but I really think women have been duped in a huge way into this whole diamond thing.

Think about it, just about EVERY girl in the US has a diamond. They really AREN''T that special or rare anymore. They don''t do this in Europe, how did american women get SO duped by the jewelers while the European women did not? Yet here, if you don''t give a big enough diamond suddenly you are looked down on like you don''t love your woman enough...and then what do we get? Nothing.

 

[Larissa]

Date: 11/1/2006 9:29:27 AM
Author: tdiggity
I guess I struggle with the idea of people having a problem with the rock being for a failed engagement. Ladies do you honestly believe we find a rock and think ''hmm this one reminds me of her''? You are entitled to your own opinion and that is fine, but I really think women have been duped in a huge way into this whole diamond thing.


Think about it, just about EVERY girl in the US has a diamond. They really AREN''T that special or rare anymore. They don''t do this in Europe, how did american women get SO duped by the jewelers while the European women did not? Yet here, if you don''t give a big enough diamond suddenly you are looked down on like you don''t love your woman enough...and then what do we get? Nothing.

I don''t mind stones from failed engagements, I mind presents where another person, an ex, was in mind while it was being chosen.

I would never have bought a super nice watch for an ex and if that relationship failed, give it to my current significant other. My ex likes Bulova, a navy blue face, and two tones band. My current likes anything titanium, super light weight, black, back-lit face.

It would be the same with the ring that was chosen. Different people like different things and to give a gift that was intended for that person can be really sad if it isn''t their style.

As far as the US vs Europe. Different people picked up on DeBeers advertising differently. Diamonds are hugely popular in the US and Japan while not so much in Europe. Once again, it has to do with style, but also with priorities. My salary in the UK is MUCH less than what I made in the US. However, it''s considered to be pretty damn good over here. On my current salary there is no money for large jewellery purchases, which I''m fine with. Also, European, as a whole put more time, energy, and effort into day-to-day life. Travel is HUGE here. Spending money on travel is really huge here. Spending money on jewellery isn''t. Different priorities for different cultures.

If you want YOUR engagement to be different, change it. You don''t have to follow what other people do. I got a ring. He got a ring. We took a trip together. We worried about what WE wanted, not the societal set-up of woman gets super expensive ring, guys gets no tangible item.

Although, historially, I think the one way giving was done in order to prove 1- you could support your future wife, and 2- because her family paid for the really expensive wedding.

 

[Julian]

It''s true. But then again, so many things we follow are part of the fantasy.

Most women wouldn''t wear a used wedding gown... and I don''t think many men would want to wear someone else''s wedding ring.

I love DMB''s idea of saving it for earrings and maybe a pendant. Who knows? Maybe his future wife will not mind using the center stone in her e-ring. Or maybe she can trade it in for her center stone.

 

[Phoenix]

I gave my e-ring back to my ex fiance when we broke up and I'd hate that he would give it to someone else, passing it off as something he bought with her in mind (I don't know since we don't keep in touch, but just the thought, eerrhhh...). But that's just me!

As for European vs. American ladies, I lived in the UK (London more precisely) for almost 20 yrs and believe me, most ladies would LOVEEEE to own a huge diamond but can't because i) it is simply not safe to wear expensive jewelery around, you're just inviting mugging (most people in London don't drive and take public transport so it's all out there for everyone to see, inclg. the robbers) and ii) economics: everything is so expensive in the UK, esp. London, so after taxes, mortgage, rent etc. there is not much left and also it is true, people do spend a lot of money on travelling and going out (going out is huge in London).

Also, unfortunately, people do look at what their peers have, it seems to me that in the US, a lot (I don't know if most, but it seems to me a lot), of ladies wear bigger diamonds so you feel that you have keep up with the Joneses. I don't know if I am right here, so pls do feel free to chime in.

 

[Larissa]

Lien, I live in London and I think you got it spot on!! That''s exactly what we spend money on now, travel and going out with friends.

 

[Cheekyprincess]

I agree with you Lien on the theory that Americans seem to have a liking for larger rings. The average in Australia (in my opinion)would be about 1/2 carat for an engagement ring and I couldn''t imagine spending tens of thousands. I know it is an investment and will never lose its value, and will last forever but still having the money for a house or car seems more important. Then I also look at it another way- my ering cost about the same as a brand new good laptop that might last a couple of years, will outdate almost immediately and after a few years will be worthless.

 

[Cehrabehra]

Date: 11/1/2006 9:29:27 AM
Author: tdiggity
I guess I struggle with the idea of people having a problem with the rock being for a failed engagement. Ladies do you honestly believe we find a rock and think ''hmm this one reminds me of her''? You are entitled to your own opinion and that is fine, but I really think women have been duped in a huge way into this whole diamond thing.

Think about it, just about EVERY girl in the US has a diamond. They really AREN''T that special or rare anymore. They don''t do this in Europe, how did american women get SO duped by the jewelers while the European women did not? Yet here, if you don''t give a big enough diamond suddenly you are looked down on like you don''t love your woman enough...and then what do we get? Nothing.

you think it''s just about diamonds? I wouldn''t want to make love on the same sheets no matter how many times they''d been washed either. I don''t want her old hat, I don''t want the scarf you gave her and left at your house.... I mean sometimes you can convince yourself hey it''s a realy cute scarf, I''ll make the exception, but generally speaking, and especially for diamond rings, you don''t want the cooties left behin by some other girl. You remember cooties don''t you? Those invisible bugs that infected things back in kindergarten? They really DO exist!!

 

[Phoenix]

I agree!! Yuck!!

 

[Cehrabehra]

Date: 11/1/2006 5:53:27 AM
Author: reader
Why not resetting it into something you will enjoy? You put the work and the money into the stones, may as well enjoy them.

I agree - make a ring for yourself and give your mom a pair of earrings!

 

[Cehrabehra]

Date: 11/1/2006 9:29:27 AM
Author: tdiggity

Think about it, just about EVERY girl in the US has a diamond. They really AREN''T that special or rare anymore. They don''t do this in Europe, how did american women get SO duped by the jewelers while the European women did not? Yet here, if you don''t give a big enough diamond suddenly you are looked down on like you don''t love your woman enough...and then what do we get? Nothing.

awwww.... sounds like someone''s jealous! I think you need a diamond for yourself

I do get your point, but I think that the fact that they''re pretty will always encourage people to want one.

 

[reader]

Fiance didn''t quite get the ring thing either, he spent much of his time in Germany while growing up. What he did understand, is thing that makes me happy. So, I got my ring, he got his ''training ring'' and a VW bus...we both respect each other''s dreams that way.