Recommendations for mom/baby must haves?

[LadyMCh]

Well, it's happened. I'm pregnant. And no one is more shocked than me. Oops.

I'm still getting used to the idea, and, in an effort to feel like I have an inkling of control, even though I know really don't, I'm in research overload mode. Please help me weed through all the crap and narrow it down the the bare necessities! Theres just SO. MUCH. STUFF. So what has worked for you and your friends? Dad recommendations are welcome, too, as my husband is a very involved kind of guy! Links, especially Amazon Prime, are super-duper-welcome!

On a humorous note, when I found out and expressed to my husband that I didn't feel ready and "What are we gonna do?!", his sarcastic response was, "I don't know! We're only 31, both gainfully employed, and have only been married 7 years! How will we make this work?!" Well, touché, dear!

 

[Ally T]

Huge congratulations!!! How exciting! I can remember vividly the test results from both of my beautiful girls - exciting times ahead for you!

As for essentials, there are many. Lots of obvious ones, but one thing I was super glad we bought having not had one previously, was a tumble dryer. Those teeny little people go through A LOT of clothes & muslin & bibs & shit-soaked socks in a single day! Being able to turn everything around quickly was a godsend.

So happy for you! (Hope there are no super sharp, pointy claws on that gorgeous yellow diamond ring!)

 

[Jambalaya]

I've never had a baby so I'm not much use on the practical front, but I just wanted to say congratulations!! Welcome to a lifetime adventure!

 

[YadaYadaYada]

Must haves:

Swaddling blankets and sleep sacks

Footie pajamas, seriously the outfits are cute but particularly in colder months these are a go to.

Grace Pack and Play with a bassinet, I had this for my second and it was a lifesaver, he slept in our room so the bassinet was super handy.

Earth Mama Angel Baby Nipple butter, you can use this as a diaper cream or on their face, super versatile and no yucky ingredients. I got mine on Amazon.

If you are having a winter baby get a Bundle Me, it's basically a blanket that you zip around the baby in the car seat so it doesn't fall off and keeps them toasty.

Also I had a Momaroo and loved it, it is pricey and you won't get to use it a long time but it helped him sleep so it was worth every penny to me.

Congrats on the pregnancy! Both of mine were surprises too

 

[Hayley87]

Congratulations!! I just had baby #2 7 weeks ago today, so I'm still in the know on current baby stuff. My best friend had her first baby this spring and asked me for a list of must-haves, so I'm pasting my email to her below. I hope the links still work since the email was sent last fall.

----

So with the full knowledge that (1) everyone has different suggestions, and (2) different things work better for different people, BUT (3) it’s really easy to get bogged down in buying stuff for your first baby that you’ll literally only use once—if ever—here are my “must have” items. I used these all the time and/or my kids loved them and/or they made our lives much easier.

Solly baby wrap and/or Maya ring sling

The two main types of wraps are ring sling (like the Maya) and wrap-around (like the Moby or Solly). Ring slings have an easier learning curve, but wrap-arounds can be used with newborns. Both kids LOVED these and spent a huge portion of my maternity leave asleep on me in it. Can’t say enough about these things! They also free up your hands so you can do things like read or tidy or whatever.

Boppy

The classic nursing pillow. SO NECESSARY. You’ll be amazed how tired your arms will get holding someone who only weighs 6-8 pounds!

A soft/flexible, large cold pack or two

Regardless of whether you plan to nurse or not, about two days after the baby is born, your milk will come in. All of a sudden, your girls will look like you perform in adult films. It’s funny at first, but then they just get bigger. And then bigger. It’s honestly terrifying: they get tight and lumpy, and I literally felt like my skin would split for a few days, and even the pressure of a SHIRT hurt. It passes, but for those few days, you NEED cool packs you can wrap around them to help ease the pain. These aren’t exactly the ones I have, but they’re pretty close

ohttps://www.amazon.com/LotFancy-Reusable-Hot-Cold-Gel-Pack/dp/B013FWXKVA/ref=sr_1_1_a_it?ie=UTF8&qid=1479231346&sr=8-1&keywords=soft+cold+pads+gel&th=1

·Dermoplast spray (blue cap)

So great for after natural labor! It’s an analgesic spray safe to use (ahem) anywhere. I would layer fridge-cool Tucks on a pad, then spray tons of Dermoplast on the Tucks. So, so helpful that first week!

Gerber Baby flannel burp cloths

We started with 4-6 of these and ended up placing two different Amazon Prime orders for more packs. Babies spit and puke more quickly than you can wash and dry all the cloths—really. We probably have 16 or 20 of these things now, and they are THE best burp cloths: super absorbent, soft, cute, hold up well, etc. My son even teethed on them for a while.

ohttps://www.amazon.com/Gerber-Girls...F8&qid=1479229960&sr=8-5&keywords=burp+cloths

A&D diaper ointment

It's cheap, it’s tried-and-true, and it’s just the best. We occasionally would use the Burt’s Bees brand, but A&D was usually our go-to

Burt’s Bees baby shampoo

Basically, just check your ingredients and DON’T get Johnson & Johnson since theirs literally causes cancer. BB is a good brand, but there are plenty other safe ones.

Munchkin bottle brushes with detachable nipple brush

oThey’re at Target, too. Simply the best.

ohttps://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00HNRQX4K/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o06_s00?ie=UTF8&th=1

Fisher-Price infant to toddler rocker

This rocker can be propped up so it’s stable, or left to rock. The dangly mobile is great for when a newborn first starts being able to focus and track things. And basically, this is a safe place to set the munchkin when you need to run to the restroom or whatever.

ohttps://www.amazon.com/Fisher-Price...eywords=fisher-price+infant+to+toddler+rocker

Wubbanub

Infants don’t have the dexterity to put a pacifier in their mouths when they fall out, but this little stuffed animal with attached pacifier can lay on the baby’s belly so it’s easier to maneuver back into their mouth. They have tons of different cute animals

ohttps://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B018HJ0TXI/ref=s9_dcacsd_dcoop_bw_c_x_3_r

Hands-free pumping strap

Pumping takes about 15 active minutes each time. If you don’t have something like this, you just have to sit and hold your girls the entire time. This lets you read!

ohttps://www.amazon.com/PumpEase-hands-free-pumping-bra-Blooms/dp/B018YIZ6L2/ref=sr_1_1_a_it?ie=UTF8&qid=1479230696&sr=8-1&keywords=Snugabell+Mom+&+Baby+Gear+Ltd&th=1

Nursing pads

Yes, they have washable/reusable ones you can buy. But you'll already be up to your eyeballs in laundry, so I highly suggest these disposable Lansinoh ones

ohttps://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B002TLU5JO/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o03_s01?ie=UTF8&th=1

NoseFrida

You think it’s gross, but then your baby has a stuffy nose and won’t stop crying, and suddenly you’re super excited to use this. Works great.

ohttps://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00171WXII/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o02_s01?ie=UTF8&th=1

Phillips Avent microwave steam sterilizer

I tried boiling all the bottles and nipples the first couple weeks, and it was a pain, took forever, and left a weird residue on things. This microwave sterilizer fits tons of bottles, pacifiers, anything plastic really, and sterilizes them in 4 minutes flat. BOOM. (You don’t have to sterilize bottles after each use, but it’s good to do once or twice a week.)

ohttps://www.amazon.com/Philips-AVENT-Microwave-Steam-Sterilizer/dp/B007VBXKG2

Bottles. Duh.

Even if you nurse, you'll eventually want/need to leave the baby with someone else. We always used the Phillips Avent Natural ones, and they worked really well for us: they have a human-like nipple shape. I’m not sure whether my son would have had problems if we’d used another brand (we haven't introduced bottles to my daughter yet), but he had no problems taking a bottle when we offered one, and no problems switching back to me when I was home.

ohttps://www.amazon.com/Philips-Natu...coding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=S9K8ERXR2A2MR0ACZHZX

A Velcro sleep sack/swaddle

Swaddling a wiggly baby is hard enough, and more so in the middle of the night. The Velcro ones are magic. There are a few brands, but we used the Halo ones.

Oxyclean stain removing spray pre-treatment

Super effective on blowouts, and the spray bottles means you don't have to touch the poop. Just spray, let sit a few minutes, and wash.

For pregnancy: a C-shaped body pillow like the LeachCo Snoogle

In the third trimester, it'll be very hard to sleep, and your body will be uncomfortable at night. I just propped myself with multiple regular pillows for my first pregnancy, and I woke up with painful hips every hour or so. I bought a Snoogle for my second pregnancy, and it made a WORLD of difference in my hip, back, and belly pain! 100% worth it.

--------

I hope this all wasn’t overwhelming! And again, take it with a grain of salt: I’m sure other family and friends have made recommendations that are at odds with mine. This is just what I couldn’t do without

Congrats again!

 

[tyty333]

Congratulations Lady McH!!! My youngest is 13 so I've been away from the baby business for quite a while so I have nothing to add but
wanted to say CONGRATS!!!

 

[qubitasaurus]

If you don't already have it, then apparently folic acid (and a pregnancy multivitamin) is important at the start. I was told the baby's spinal tube apparently closes over at week 4, and that you want to make sure you are not deficient in certain vitamins when it is being formed. Afterwards the book "what to eat when you are pregnant" seemed to help -- at the very least it gives you something to concentrate on instead of flipping out over the fact that you just ate raw bean sprouts, or have been drinking 2 cups of coffee a day.

Also understand what your insurance plan does and doesn't cover for pregnancy, and whether you need/want additional insurance against complications and neonatal care. If nothing is covered, then maybe set aside some money.

 

[LLJsmom]

First thing that came to mind is Medela breast pump. Buy the one in the back pack. Don't know if you plan to work or stay at home but it will free you up to have someone else feed the baby and still be able to feed the baby breast milk. Buy bags to freeze extra milk. Then you can pump in between feedings to keep your supply up and you can leave the baby for a weekend and still have food for the baby.

 

[Platinum-blonde]

Congrats!!!! When are you due? I totally understand that, "oh, shit!" moment. Lol. I waited until I was married for 13 years before feeling like I was as ready as I would ever be, and the only reason was because I had officially entered the Advanced Maternal Age category. My second baby is turning one this week!

Anyway, I have to second the Earth Mama Angel Baby nipple butter. It's a lifesaver. There aren't any harmful ingredients, and you don't have to wipe it off when you nurse (who has time for that?!?!).

I also agreed the Boppy is a must have. It works for nursing, and bottle feeding. Get the best nursing chair you can afford. You're probably going to spend lots of hours in it.

With our second baby, we got the automatic Rock n Play. It's amazing! I don't know how we lived without one.

Try out as many baby carriers as you can. They all fit differently, and getting a good fit will make all the difference.

Your life is never going to be the same, enjoy the ride!

 

[Tekate]

This will sound odd, but the must have is sleep. Try to stay rested and healthy. Sleep will be much more scarce whens XX/XY arrives. Also, have a decent circle of friends with experience. If you are close with your mom/MIL that is always a help for an hour or two of sleep.

Your life is going topsy turvey in a wonderful way. I just told my 29 year old son today that nothing in life meant a thing to me but him and his brother. (yes my hubster and parents/family too).

Congratulations!!!!

 

[yennyfire]

I too, have been out of the baby loop for over 10 years, but wanted to add my congrats and best wishes!

My one piece of advice is to NOT stay sequestered at home the first few months after the baby is born. They are very portable at that age, as they sleep all the time, so don't be afraid to take him/her out. I had a hard time nursing and ended up pumping, so we didn't get out at all and I felt so isolated. So, make a point to go out as often as possible those first few months...

 

[LadyMCh]

I too, have been out of the baby loop for over 10 years, but wanted to add my congrats and best wishes!

My one piece of advice is to NOT stay sequestered at home the first few months after the baby is born. They are very portable at that age, as they sleep all the time, so don't be afraid to take him/her out. I had a hard time nursing and ended up pumping, so we didn't get out at all and I felt so isolated. So, make a point to go out as often as possible those first few months...

Yessss!!! Strollers/wraps/baby carriers are super important to me because we love getting out and exploring our city and traveling near or far! I do NOT want to sacrifice that, so I'm trying to figure out ideas for how to best adapt and compromise! I get depressed if I stay in too much.

 

[LadyMCh]

This will sound odd, but the must have is sleep. Try to stay rested and healthy. Sleep will be much more scarce whens XX/XY arrives. Also, have a decent circle of friends with experience. If you are close with your mom/MIL that is always a help for an hour or two of sleep.

Your life is going topsy turvey in a wonderful way. I just told my 29 year old son today that nothing in life meant a thing to me but him and his brother. (yes my hubster and parents/family too).

Congratulations!!!!

Unfortunately my MIL is in another country, my step-MIL is ~20hrs away, and my mom is ~11hrs away. I'm hoping one of my younger, not-so-gainfully employed SILs (but who is GREAT w/ babies) will move across the country and in w/ us to be a live in nanny. I'm not holding my breath, but a girl can dream, right?! Otherwise, I'll be auditioning local people to nanny... DH travels A LOT for work, so I will be on my own A LOT. BUT, on the bright side, when he is home, he is HOME. Often, he doesn't even have to go into work at all, but if he does, it may just be for a couple hours.

 

[LadyMCh]

First thing that came to mind is Medela breast pump. Buy the one in the back pack. Don't know if you plan to work or stay at home but it will free you up to have someone else feed the baby and still be able to feed the baby breast milk. Buy bags to freeze extra milk. Then you can pump in between feedings to keep your supply up and you can leave the baby for a weekend and still have food for the baby.

Hoping to continue working. May try to switch from full time to PRN, though. And would prefer to breastfeed, as it is "homemade" and free! But if I have trouble, "fed is best!"

 

[LadyMCh]

If you don't already have it, then apparently folic acid (and a pregnancy multivitamin) is important at the start. I was told the baby's spinal tube apparently closes over at week 4, and that you want to make sure you are not deficient in certain vitamins when it is being formed. Afterwards the book "what to eat when you are pregnant" seemed to help -- at the very least it gives you something to concentrate on instead of flipping out over the fact that you just ate raw bean sprouts, or have been drinking 2 cups of coffee a day.

Also understand what your insurance plan does and doesn't cover for pregnancy, and whether you need/want additional insurance against complications and neonatal care. If nothing is covered, then maybe set aside some money.

Our insurance is solid, hallelujah! But that's a very good point that I wouldn't initially think about. Umm...funny thing is...I 100% did not realize I was pregnant. I've been the my primary doctor, but don't go to the obgyn until this week. I won't find out how far along I am until then as my primary no longer does the blood test to estimate. Obgyn will do a "bump to rump" ultrasound measurement that should give a good estimate, but my doctor is guessing 8-12wks. Drinking 2 cups of coffee a day is the least of my concerns; I was literally riding rollercoasters at Universal Studios 4wks ago pulling up to 5Gs. Plus plenty of other stuff where, now that I know, am like "omg". However, the night I found out, the first thing I did was order prenatal vitamins on Amazon!

 

[LadyMCh]

Congratulations!! I just had baby #2 7 weeks ago today, so I'm still in the know on current baby stuff. My best friend had her first baby this spring and asked me for a list of must-haves, so I'm pasting my email to her below. I hope the links still work since the email was sent last fall.

----

So with the full knowledge that (1) everyone has different suggestions, and (2) different things work better for different people, BUT (3) it’s really easy to get bogged down in buying stuff for your first baby that you’ll literally only use once—if ever—here are my “must have” items. I used these all the time and/or my kids loved them and/or they made our lives much easier.

Solly baby wrap and/or Maya ring sling

The two main types of wraps are ring sling (like the Maya) and wrap-around (like the Moby or Solly). Ring slings have an easier learning curve, but wrap-arounds can be used with newborns. Both kids LOVED these and spent a huge portion of my maternity leave asleep on me in it. Can’t say enough about these things! They also free up your hands so you can do things like read or tidy or whatever.

Boppy

The classic nursing pillow. SO NECESSARY. You’ll be amazed how tired your arms will get holding someone who only weighs 6-8 pounds!

A soft/flexible, large cold pack or two

Regardless of whether you plan to nurse or not, about two days after the baby is born, your milk will come in. All of a sudden, your girls will look like you perform in adult films. It’s funny at first, but then they just get bigger. And then bigger. It’s honestly terrifying: they get tight and lumpy, and I literally felt like my skin would split for a few days, and even the pressure of a SHIRT hurt. It passes, but for those few days, you NEED cool packs you can wrap around them to help ease the pain. These aren’t exactly the ones I have, but they’re pretty close

ohttps://www.amazon.com/LotFancy-Reusable-Hot-Cold-Gel-Pack/dp/B013FWXKVA/ref=sr_1_1_a_it?ie=UTF8&qid=1479231346&sr=8-1&keywords=soft+cold+pads+gel&th=1

·Dermoplast spray (blue cap)

So great for after natural labor! It’s an analgesic spray safe to use (ahem) anywhere. I would layer fridge-cool Tucks on a pad, then spray tons of Dermoplast on the Tucks. So, so helpful that first week!

Gerber Baby flannel burp cloths

We started with 4-6 of these and ended up placing two different Amazon Prime orders for more packs. Babies spit and puke more quickly than you can wash and dry all the cloths—really. We probably have 16 or 20 of these things now, and they are THE best burp cloths: super absorbent, soft, cute, hold up well, etc. My son even teethed on them for a while.

ohttps://www.amazon.com/Gerber-Girls...F8&qid=1479229960&sr=8-5&keywords=burp+cloths

A&D diaper ointment

It's cheap, it’s tried-and-true, and it’s just the best. We occasionally would use the Burt’s Bees brand, but A&D was usually our go-to

Burt’s Bees baby shampoo

Basically, just check your ingredients and DON’T get Johnson & Johnson since theirs literally causes cancer. BB is a good brand, but there are plenty other safe ones.

Munchkin bottle brushes with detachable nipple brush

oThey’re at Target, too. Simply the best.

ohttps://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00HNRQX4K/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o06_s00?ie=UTF8&th=1

Fisher-Price infant to toddler rocker

This rocker can be propped up so it’s stable, or left to rock. The dangly mobile is great for when a newborn first starts being able to focus and track things. And basically, this is a safe place to set the munchkin when you need to run to the restroom or whatever.

ohttps://www.amazon.com/Fisher-Price...eywords=fisher-price+infant+to+toddler+rocker

Wubbanub

Infants don’t have the dexterity to put a pacifier in their mouths when they fall out, but this little stuffed animal with attached pacifier can lay on the baby’s belly so it’s easier to maneuver back into their mouth. They have tons of different cute animals

ohttps://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B018HJ0TXI/ref=s9_dcacsd_dcoop_bw_c_x_3_r

Hands-free pumping strap

Pumping takes about 15 active minutes each time. If you don’t have something like this, you just have to sit and hold your girls the entire time. This lets you read!

ohttps://www.amazon.com/PumpEase-hands-free-pumping-bra-Blooms/dp/B018YIZ6L2/ref=sr_1_1_a_it?ie=UTF8&qid=1479230696&sr=8-1&keywords=Snugabell+Mom+&+Baby+Gear+Ltd&th=1

Nursing pads

Yes, they have washable/reusable ones you can buy. But you'll already be up to your eyeballs in laundry, so I highly suggest these disposable Lansinoh ones

ohttps://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B002TLU5JO/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o03_s01?ie=UTF8&th=1

NoseFrida

You think it’s gross, but then your baby has a stuffy nose and won’t stop crying, and suddenly you’re super excited to use this. Works great.

ohttps://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00171WXII/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o02_s01?ie=UTF8&th=1

Phillips Avent microwave steam sterilizer

I tried boiling all the bottles and nipples the first couple weeks, and it was a pain, took forever, and left a weird residue on things. This microwave sterilizer fits tons of bottles, pacifiers, anything plastic really, and sterilizes them in 4 minutes flat. BOOM. (You don’t have to sterilize bottles after each use, but it’s good to do once or twice a week.)

ohttps://www.amazon.com/Philips-AVENT-Microwave-Steam-Sterilizer/dp/B007VBXKG2

Bottles. Duh.

Even if you nurse, you'll eventually want/need to leave the baby with someone else. We always used the Phillips Avent Natural ones, and they worked really well for us: they have a human-like nipple shape. I’m not sure whether my son would have had problems if we’d used another brand (we haven't introduced bottles to my daughter yet), but he had no problems taking a bottle when we offered one, and no problems switching back to me when I was home.

ohttps://www.amazon.com/Philips-Natu...coding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=S9K8ERXR2A2MR0ACZHZX

A Velcro sleep sack/swaddle

Swaddling a wiggly baby is hard enough, and more so in the middle of the night. The Velcro ones are magic. There are a few brands, but we used the Halo ones.

Oxyclean stain removing spray pre-treatment

Super effective on blowouts, and the spray bottles means you don't have to touch the poop. Just spray, let sit a few minutes, and wash.

For pregnancy: a C-shaped body pillow like the LeachCo Snoogle

In the third trimester, it'll be very hard to sleep, and your body will be uncomfortable at night. I just propped myself with multiple regular pillows for my first pregnancy, and I woke up with painful hips every hour or so. I bought a Snoogle for my second pregnancy, and it made a WORLD of difference in my hip, back, and belly pain! 100% worth it.

--------

I hope this all wasn’t overwhelming! And again, take it with a grain of salt: I’m sure other family and friends have made recommendations that are at odds with mine. This is just what I couldn’t do without

Congrats again!

LOVE all the practical suggestions!

 

[LLJsmom]

Hoping to continue working. May try to switch from full time to PRN, though. And would prefer to breastfeed, as it is "homemade" and free! But if I have trouble, "fed is best!"

The backpack Medela is great to travel with. I pumped from months 6-12 when I returned to work. My company had a mother's room where we could pump and store our milk in a little refrigerator. Then my supply would not drop when I could not directly breastfeed. Good luck!!

 

[Hayley87]

Hoping to continue working. May try to switch from full time to PRN, though. And would prefer to breastfeed, as it is "homemade" and free! But if I have trouble, "fed is best!"

Like LLJsmom, I pumped at work for my son from months 4-12. I had the purse/tote-style Medela, and it was great. But just like you said, "Fed is best!"

If you find your supply dropping (mine always would if I didn't eat enough or drink lots of water, or anytime I got sick), consider getting Fenugreek tablets. Full disclosure that they make you smell like Indian curry for the few days you take it , but it really helps your supply get back on track!

 

[Dancing Fire]

Congrats!. Must have a lot of diapers and butt wipes... I haven't changed a diaper in 27 yrs.

 

[Austina]

Congratulations!

My 'baby' is 34 next month! One thing I would say is that if you decide not to, or have problems breastfeeding, please don't let anyone make you feeling guilty or somehow inadequate. I chose not to, and my son is a strapping, healthy man!

I had a carry cot, a cot, a stroller a baby bath, and waited till I actually needed things before buying too much.

The one thing I did have lots of, were the little pop stud all in ones, as I was changing him several times a day, due to accidents from one end or the other!

 

[imitcan]

Congrats!

All of the suggestions are excellent. My youngest is almost 20, so I don't have a lot to add to the list. Although that Boppy was very helpful as he was just over 9 lbs at birth and despite the 40 lbs I gained in pregnancy, none of it seemed to contribute to upper arm strength.

I used a breast pump not so much for bottle feeding but to keep my breast milk coming as all he wanted to do was eat, and eventually to mix into baby cereals etc.

I agree with the recommendation to take care of yourself prenatally and I'd like to add, to nurture a solid relationship with your doctor. After my youngest I had a bit of postpartum depression. I cried all the time. I never had issues bonding with my babies but I certainly pulled away from social connections. I didn't feel like myself.

21 years ago postpartum issues weren't talked about as much as they are now. I didn't have it after having my other babies so I was blindsided. My doctor (and my husband) caught it and recommended a lot of really simple things to help my state of mind: outdoor time for exposure to vitamin D, exercise, joining a moms' group, visiting and staying my parents (who lived 5 hours away) instead of being home alone all day while my husband worked. I knew these strategies would be beneficial (I did all that with my first two) but this time I seemed to need the extra push and support to actually do them. Thankfully it was mild and short-lived, I began feeling more like myself after a month or so.

And when I look at baby photos or when I see a young mom who is expecting or pushing a stroller, I always smile. I would do it again in a heartbeat. Enjoy the wonderful time ahead. All the best.

 

[vintagelover229]

Congratulations! My gf just had her first after 30 and wasn't expected nor was she really a 'kid' person and let me tell you-motherhood has changed her and she LOVES it. It's hard and challenging but you'll rock it (we all do eventually!) remember being pregnant/having a little person is only a very short season. A trying, tiring one-filled with lots of learning curves and funny moments but they stay only that small for so long. My eldest will be 5 soon-and I am due in 6wks with #3!


I HIGHLY recommend connecting with a local babywearing chapter to find the right carrier for you. I usually recommend a ring sling (if your on facebook there is a group called babywearing on a budget or the babywearing swap. If you tell me where your located I can help you find a chapter. The only reason I suggest doing this is not only will it connect you with an awesome circle of moms, but they also will give you hands on help trying different carriers so you know which is best suited for you and your baby before forking over the dough. There are SO many different kids (hug a loops is a great one for younger babies), soft structured carriers such as the Lullibaby, tula, ergo, etc. then there are asian style of carriers such as the mei tai carrier/ meh dai ( I LOVE these carriers, very easy to use-basically 4 straps you tie and a long rectangle panel that the baby sits in).

Really all you need (as long as your able to breast feed successfully which I highly recommend-and find a good support system bc for a lot of moms at first its not walk in the park, there is a learning curve for yourself and the baby but if not there are other options out there thankfully!) and diapers. I use cloth, but many don't care for the extra work (but for me the savings/environmental impact far outweighs one extra load every few days-not to mention they are SUPER CUTE) and a carrier.

However if your looking for suggestions for the 'must have frills' here is my go to after having 2 and learning a bit.

Momma roo 2 moms swing. Find this used, you'll save about 50%
2 moms pack and play. Super easy to set up and down. Also try to find it used.

I went with a convertible carseat bc I didn't care much for the ones you click in and out. I understand the appeal-baby is asleep stick them from the car/into the stroller but actually they aren't meant to be slept in (I know-whatever it takes for sanity purposes I get it) but even in the manuals they don't recommend it and I knew I would be tempted to leave a sleeping kid in a car seat-who wants to wake a sleeping baby? Not me!
I also didn't like the idea of needing to buy another car seat in a year-they aren't cheap so I went with the diono radian rxt. Expensive but fits all your need from birth to booster! Not to mention high ratings

Stroller-depending on your needs we just got a jogging stroller. I HIGHLY recommend the bumbleride Indie. It is awesome, that's all I can say. Though if your more interested in a stroller that does the car seat/multi use I highly recommend I think its called uppababy? Its a pretty high end brand-shop preowned. You'll save a forune buying used baby things-and they use them for such a short time a good wipe down will save you a TON of money. People give baby stuff away they paid a fortune for!

I recommend a cosleeper. I know there's mixed info online about it-but keeping them in at least your room with you will save you sanity. You know there are more positions than just regular nursing position? You can LAY ON YOUR SIDE and nurse. Seriously, that saved me SO MUCH SLEEP. They will dream feed. Its amazing. You can get something that side carts to your bed to move the baby too.

I know this isn't right away but min. footwear is important. What I mean by that is not having a lot of stuff on the bottom. It's bad for their feet development-there is a group called minimalist footwear that has a lot of great shoe options. Softstar shoes are hand made in the USA and are very popular. Wear well too!

Also, invest in good nursing gear. Better if you can find them used but boob brand shirts are amazing. I skipped this with my first and bought some used for my second and wow-no idea how awesome a shirt with a hidden opening could be. Seriously the best.

Blankets-I know they are a bit trendy but tula blankets are amazing. They are woven bamboo and super soft and cute.

If you need any help with carriers let me know. I'm kind of obsessed. In fact I've sold most of my diamond collection (I KNOW!) to buy art fabric to wear them in and now am a textile artist all discovered bc of babywearing.

A few pictures of different carriers. There is a buckle tula which my hubs now has claimed (no pictures in use though sadly) him using a ring sling with our first-me wearing a rainbow by water is a wrap conversion meh dai and then me using handwoven art yardage after I finally got the courage to learn to wrap.

 

[baby monster]

Congrats! I have 2 kids, my youngest is 17mos so all this baby stuff is fairly fresh in my mind. I recommend waiting to buy stuff and not overbuy. I gift all my gfs this book when they announce https://www.amazon.com/Baby-Bargains-Secrets-Saving-strollers/dp/188939257X/
Babies can be finicky and hate things others recommended. If you have amazon prime, stuff can be at your door same day. Hospital even gave me diapers and wipes to go.

Stuff that I needed at home on day 1:
-place for baby to sleep. pack-n-play worked for us for first 6 mos and then a full-size crib.
-carseat. I preferred infant carseats.
-stroller. I love my BOB and it comes with carseat attachment. https://www.amazon.com/BOB-2016-Revolution-Stroller-Lagoon/dp/B01BSR9R2U/
-few cotton footie pijamas. fleece ones are good in winter.
-baby swing. Lifesaver for us but some kids hate them.
-diapers, a&d ointment and cloth rags for diaper cleanups. I was told to stay away from wipes in the first couple months.
-good nursing bra. I liked this brand https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B002XV44ZQ/
-breastfeeding support. Bfing is hard work and didn't really come naturally to any woman I asked so if it's important to you, I recommend hiring a bfing consultant to be there in person in the beginning. Too easy to give up when baby doesn't latch on correctly and you aren't getting any sleep. La Leche League is a good source so is http://kellymom.com/

Stuff that is optional
-baby carriers. both of my kids screamed bloody murder in few different structured carriers and fabric wraps I tried.
-pump. I used my Medela a lot at work but some women can't get into pumping
-bottles. If bfing, don't need until you're back at work.
-pacifiers. My second wouldn't take it at all.
-cute outfits and too much clothing. Babies grow quickly so clothing can be worn once or twice and then become too small. A good diaper blow-out can be terminal to a cute outfit.

 

[Asscherhalo_lover]

I would say research on Lucie's List and Baby Gear Lab, that helped me figure out what would work for my family. All of the "gear" can be purchased on an as needed basis, there are so many things people "insist" on that I never used (my son is 18 months).

 

[mom2dolls]

You have received great recommendations above.
My youngest is 14.
My best advise is pertaining to nursing or bottle feeding: Never let anyone make you feel badly about your choice or what your baby needs. My oldest nursed like a champ with little issue. My youngest needed formula supplemented from birth as she was hungrier than the average baby. I tried to nurse her, pump and keep up with her ravenous appetite. She still needed the combo of formula and breast milk. Do what is right for you and baby. Healthy baby is most important regardless of what they drink.
Lastly - CONGRATULTIONS!!! Life will never be the same, in the very best way.

 

[SMC]

If you're in the US, your insurance will cover a free electric breast pump. A hands-free pumping bra is essential if you plan to pump. You can DIY one with an old sports bra if you want.

You're going to and may have already received lots of baby and parenting advice. Just remember that most parents have maybe 2-3 data points when they say that something "works sooo well" or is a "must have". Every baby and parent is going to be different, so just see how it goes with yours. You don't need much in the first few weeks besides some diapers, a few onesies, and a place for the baby to sleep. I bought a ton of Dr Brown bottles because my SIL and BFF recommended them and my daughter hated them. I suppose I could also have followed their advice and just given them to her anyway and forced her to take them, but I just couldn't do that to my tiny baby. So I had to buy a few different bottles until we found one that she would take consistently.

That said, my must-have baby items for the first few weeks:
- diapers - if going disposable, start with buying size 1 diapers. Your baby will likely grow out of newborn diapers before he/she leaves the hospital
- nursing pillow - I had the My Brest Friend
- breast pump - I had the Medela Pump In Style (free, thanks to Obamacare)
- Ergo 360 - my daughter really liked to be forward facing in this carrier once she got older
- diaper cream - we used Aquaphor baby and Boudreaux's butt paste
- nursing bra - I started wearing these during pregnancy because my boobs got bigger
- nursing pads - I used the Lansinoh Stay Dry disposable ones
- footie pajamas - my daughter wore these as her regular outfit until she was 4 months old and we had to send her to daycare
- car seat - we had the Chicco Keyfit 30, but any will do. I recommend getting a separate infant one instead of the convertible infant-to-toddler ones because you can easily take the infant car seats out of the car (and it seems like my daughter was always sleeping in her car seat)
- changing table - yes, you can change your baby on the sofa or floor, but it would have killed my back to lean over that much
- wipes

Here are items that I got at my shower and never used:
- Baby Bjorn Balance Bouncer
- Dr Brown Bottles (we ended up using Comotomo)
- mobile (for hanging above the crib)
- those little pouches for storing your own baby food (I never made my own baby food)
- lovey (my kid has no interest in stuffed animals or any type of security item)
- Primo Eurobath bathtub - nice and big, has an infant side that prevents newborns from slipping under, but still appropriate for larger kids (my kid still uses this and she's 2.5)
- travel crib - we ended up cosleeping (this works for us but not for everyone - I certainly was firmly against cosleeping while pregnant) so we never ended up needing to bring a crib with us anywhere
- Bumbo - we just never used this
- rattles
- baby monitor - because of the cosleeping
- diaper covers - I wanted to use cloth diapers while pregnant, but I ended up using disposable because I just didn't have the time and energy for cloth

 

[LLJsmom]

And I would highly recommend training the baby to take a bottle, and from someone other than you as well, preferably your DH/Partner, who is the person that will be there more than anyone else other than you. Then you won't feel like you cannot get away. Maybe you won't ever feel that way, but I sure did. Going back to work at 5 months was absolutely the best thing for me. It forced me to let my DH break my son of breastfeeding solely. After I went back to work, my son could feed from a bottle and from me. Thank goodness!!! And definitely make yourself a priority. It's hard to tell a new mom not to feel guilty so I don't. I tell them to take care of themselves even if they DON'T feel like it. For me, that meant making time to work out every day. Somehow, someway Mommy was going to get her workout in or EVERYONE would be sorry. I am sure it's different for everyone so find your thing(s) and allow yourself that time. You deserve it. So does your family.

Things I didn't use:
Son: bouncy chair (while my daughter loved it), co-sleeper (My DH insisted my son sleep in his own crib. I was really against it but gave in after I was really sleep deprived, and I could NOT get any sleep with my son that close. I'm really glad he learned to sleep in his own crib from the beginning because it allowed me to get real sleep and my DH and me to maintain some sort of normalcy.) mobile, a variety of toys...

Daughter: pacifiers (She wasn't interested while my son loved them.), play pen, mobile, also a variety of toys,

Milk production - Everyone has something different. I had to keep eating and drinking a lot to keep up my production. The fluid that worked the best for me was a lot of meat and bone based broths, that were low in fat. I drank a ton every day. And if the food wasn't nailed down, it was going in. I did try to buy mostly healthy options, but never went more than 1.5 hours without eating.

 

[gem_anemone]

Congratulations! Usually I lurk, but I just wanted to sign in and tell you congratulations on your pregnancy! I am due next week with #2. We are about done with preparations for her arrival. I just wanted to share our list of baby items.

Bring home needs:
Infant car seat
Safe sleep space - alone, back and crib are what's recommended by the AAP (we used a bassinet for the first few months and then pack n play after he grew out of that and he slept in our room next to the bed for almost one year)
Halo sleep sacks
Onesies and any other nightgowns/sleepers you like. I preferred ones with zippers over buttons
Diapers/wipes - my first baby never needed butt cream until he was older. We used Bourdeaux's when he did need it.
Baby milk - nursing or formula/bottles
If nursing I highly recommend a product such as a Boppy. I used the Boppy every day for months for nursing, tummy time and sitting baby up. I didn't start off with it, but I highly recommend it from day one at the hospital!
Nursing cover
Nipple cream (I prefered Medela brand)
Burp cloths
Small blankets (receiving or swaddle)
Diaper bag (recommend this with insulated pocket)

Going back to work needs:
If nursing - dual breast pump with travel bag/cooler, accessories, bottles, cleaning brushes, steam bags, storage bags. And most importantly a clean, private space to pump and support from coworkers. Without all this stuff I would never have continued to pump after returning to work. To add to the complication of going back to work my son wouldn't take a bottle and when he finally did he would only use latex nipples. He would not touch a silicone nipple. We went through so many of those expensive and special "feels like mommy" bottles and he refused them ALL until we realized it was the silicone he hated.
Trusted caretaker

Used often, but not necessary:
Nursing clothing - bras, shirts and washable pads (made my life 10x easier)
Caddy for all the things you need/want to carry around the house with you postpartum
Changing table
Infant swing/bouncer combo
Baby stroller/Ergo type carrier (we used both for outings and I just got the Moby for my new baby as the Ergo is not great for infants even with the insert IMO)
Simple bottle warmer (even if nursing this is good for a babysitter or supplemental formula feedings)
Diaper genie (we love it because it's an enclosed trash can that is even more useful when the baby is older and wants to get in the trash)
Arm and Hammer baggies
Baby monitor app
Mesh bathing seat for tub
Rear facing mirror for the car
High chair
Snot sucker/Saline drops/Thermometer/liquid Tylenol - have these on hand as you never know when the little one will fall ill
Nail scissors
White noise machine
Black out curtains

Did not use:
Wipe warmer (laughable item)
Pacifiers - My son sucked his thumb and hated pacis as much as bottles
An excess of baby clothes/shoes
Excess of silicone nipple bottles
Rock n play (No matter what people say these are not for sleep - I only used it for an extra place to set the baby down to use the restroom or do any small task)
In reality I had a lot of extra baby seating/laying areas that were given to me as gifts. I just placed them around the house so I had somewhere safe for the baby to lay while I was doing whatever I needed to do.

Good luck!