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Pulling the trigger on a ring

cjbills

Rough_Rock
Joined
Mar 17, 2016
Messages
19
Hello everyone.

First off, thank you in advance for the service and education you guys provide guys like me. I've been creeping on the boards for a while now and this has been very educational.

Ok, so my girlfriend is very easy going/doesn't have any requirements/happy with anything/not sure what the right word is, but she'd just as happily wear a ring out of a cracker jack box. Due to the circumstances of how we are going to have to hold off on the wedding ceremony/celebration and a few other things, I wanted to try to do something more traditional for her with the ring.

She's Japanese and quite petite, so I think even a smaller stone would look amplified on her hand. Her style is definitely a princess cut, so I was thinking about the following:

jamesallen.com/loose-diamonds/princess-cut/1.03-carat-g-color-vs2-clarity-sku-1762851

jamesallen.com/loose-diamonds/princess-cut/1.05-carat-g-color-vs1-clarity-sku-1864837

jamesallen.com/loose-diamonds/princess-cut/1.07-carat-g-color-vs1-clarity-sku-1864824

jamesallen.com/loose-diamonds/princess-cut/1.03-carat-g-color-vs2-clarity-sku-2003475

jamesallen.com/loose-diamonds/princess-cut/1.12-carat-g-color-vs2-clarity-sku-1762855

Where I would greatly appreciate help from the community is ensuring I am getting the best deal I can for the stone. I know this shouldn't be the first thing that comes to mind in this process, but I'd say my brain is wired a little bit differently than the average person. If I did make a poor choice, I'd be constantly reminded of it every time I looked at the ring.

So anything you guys can do to steer me in the direction of a really great value for an ~1 carat princess cut, I would greatly appreciate it. I don't have any budget per say, it's just important to me that I do well value wise on the purchase.

Thank you
 

soxfan

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Jun 20, 2013
Messages
4,811
cjbills|1473159976|4073614 said:
Her style is definitely a princess cut
What are you using to decide this? Have you seen her pinterest page? Has she said she likes princess cuts?
 

mrs-b

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Aug 18, 2013
Messages
7,965
Hi cjbills -

You mentioned you thought your requirements were different to most guys' - no, not really. In my experience on PS, most women are looking for a confluence of size, color, size, clarity, size and performance. And size. Most guys want great specs - probably because they don't have to wear it, so aren't as concerned about how it looks proportionally on the finger. Having said that, though, if performance is your main concern - we're all right there with you! So you've come to the right place.

Before we start pulling up stones and passing you information, can I suggest that you forever discard the idea of "she'd be happy with anything - even a ring from a cracker jack box." Can't tell you how often we see that exact comment - especially the cracker jack box analogy - nor how often we see that blow up in the gentleman's face when he gets her *not* what she was hoping for. And believe me, almost all girls have something they're hoping for - even the easy-going cracker jack box ones. The only girls who *truly* want the ring from the cereal box are the ones who walk into Tiffany and say to the first attendant they see "Take me to the cracker jack box section!!"

So - as soxfan said - does your girl have a Pinterest page? What makes you think she'd like a princess cut stone? What size is her finger? What size diamonds do her friends/sisters/mother have? Is she from a culture which requires certain levels of clarity or color to be deemed acceptable? With NO criticism or sarcasm intended whatsoever - the trick to getting a great engagement ring is in getting her what she wants, not what you'd like to give her.

So - can you give us some info re the questions above?

Wishing you the best for your ring buying journey - and rest assured - you'll walk away with something fabulous! :wavey:
 

tyty333

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Dec 17, 2008
Messages
22,729
The last 2 stones you posted were my favorite. Particularly the 4th stone. It has a cute curved table and you can see the 2 different
crown facets that make it look like its a table within a table.
 

cjbills

Rough_Rock
Joined
Mar 17, 2016
Messages
19
soxfan|1473176376|4073690 said:
cjbills|1473159976|4073614 said:
Her style is definitely a princess cut
What are you using to decide this? Have you seen her pinterest page? Has she said she likes princess cuts?
Hi!

The proposal is definitely a surprise, so I haven't overtly asked.

I'm just going by what I know of her personal style - which I am fairly confident about.
 

lovedogs

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Jul 31, 2014
Messages
11,379
cjbills|1473186106|4073760 said:
soxfan|1473176376|4073690 said:
cjbills|1473159976|4073614 said:
Her style is definitely a princess cut
What are you using to decide this? Have you seen her pinterest page? Has she said she likes princess cuts?
Hi!

The proposal is definitely a surprise, so I haven't overtly asked.

I'm just going by what I know of her personal style - which I am fairly confident about.
I think many of us would caution you not to just go based on your "gut" feeling about this. Even though you could be right, there's a possibility you aren't, and that could lead to everyone being disappointed. I'd try to ask some of her friends/see if she has a pinterest page/try to ask her in a somewhat casual way. Princess cuts aren't for everyone, so I'd strongly suggest doing more research on her preferences before committing to a somewhat unusual shape (princess cuts can be lovely--they just aren't everyone's cup of tea). :wavey:
 

cjbills

Rough_Rock
Joined
Mar 17, 2016
Messages
19
mrs-b|1473182347|4073715 said:
Hi cjbills -

You mentioned you thought your requirements were different to most guys' - no, not really. In my experience on PS, most women are looking for a confluence of size, color, size, clarity, size and performance. And size. Most guys want great specs - probably because they don't have to wear it, so aren't as concerned about how it looks proportionally on the finger. Having said that, though, if performance is your main concern - we're all right there with you! So you've come to the right place.

Before we start pulling up stones and passing you information, can I suggest that you forever discard the idea of "she'd be happy with anything - even a ring from a cracker jack box." Can't tell you how often we see that exact comment - especially the cracker jack box analogy - nor how often we see that blow up in the gentleman's face when he gets her *not* what she was hoping for. And believe me, almost all girls have something they're hoping for - even the easy-going cracker jack box ones. The only girls who *truly* want the ring from the cereal box are the ones who walk into Tiffany and say to the first attendant they see "Take me to the cracker jack box section!!"

So - as soxfan said - does your girl have a Pinterest page? What makes you think she'd like a princess cut stone? What size is her finger? What size diamonds do her friends/sisters/mother have? Is she from a culture which requires certain levels of clarity or color to be deemed acceptable? With NO criticism or sarcasm intended whatsoever - the trick to getting a great engagement ring is in getting her what she wants, not what you'd like to give her.

So - can you give us some info re the questions above?

Wishing you the best for your ring buying journey - and rest assured - you'll walk away with something fabulous! :wavey:
Whoops, I should have known that wouldn't have come off well or original.

She doesn't have a Pinterest page, and she doesn't wear jewelry very often. When she does, she prefers less expensive things that are more with the current trend than anything more timeless that one would keep forever.

Unfortunately (for the purposes of this), all of her siblings are brothers and her mother is divorced so no longer wears her ring. Her mother knows I am going to propose, but she actually doesn't speak English, so opening the conversation with her too much would likely involve a few too many people in the conversation.

I'm basing the princess cut idea on what I see her wear and what I have seen her admire stylistically over the years. Culturally, there are no requirements whatsoever. She kind of rebels against many of the customs and formalities her friends go through in Japan. She actually refuses to live there, but that's a long story.

Her ring size is 5.5.

I would be open to proposing with a placeholder ring and then letting her totally pick her own out, but honestly speaking, I really think she'd appreciate it more if it was a gift from me that I picked out for her.

I know this is kind of a blank whiteboard of information, but she's a pretty unique girl.
 

kb1gra

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Jul 6, 2012
Messages
937
I of course don't know your girlfriend, but if she rebels against standard things and prefers trendy jewelry, I'm not sure she's going to want a princess cut. I would be more inclined to say she'd want a petite round with maybe a more interesting designer setting. This is just based on what you've said. Princesses had a moment of popularity in the early 2000s but have sort of faded out again. That said, if that's what you want, do you have a setting in mind? Princesses have some setting considerations that are different from other stones.

If I were shopping for a princess in this size/price range I would probably choose this one, mostly because I think the Brian Gavin settings are nicer and they can tell you a lot more about this stone. I think this in a Sholdt setting would be really quite something.

http://www.briangavindiamonds.com/diamonds/diamond-details/1.108-g-si1-princess-diamond-ags-104075727001#!prettyPhoto[gallery2]/2/
 

FightGravity

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Mar 26, 2015
Messages
240
cjbills|1473188030|4073774 said:
She doesn't have a Pinterest page, and she doesn't wear jewelry very often. When she does, she prefers less expensive things that are more with the current trend than anything more timeless that one would keep forever.

... she's a pretty unique girl.
Neither of these ideas screams "princess cut" to me. What SPECIFICALLY is making you think she would like a princess cut?

If it's about a square shape, I would go cushion.

If it's about wanting something unique, I would pick a quirky setting.

What jewelry does she currently wear? How does she dress? Have you ever heard her say anything about friends' engagement rings or about what she would like?

I think you need to find some way to figure out what she would like to wear. Right now you are shooting in the dark.
 

lovedogs

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Jul 31, 2014
Messages
11,379
I do agree with others that we need more info, but from what you're saying about being modern and less interested in "classic" styles, one idea I like is to go with a more traditional stone shape (round), but get a unique and modern setting. The designer I immediately think of when I hear 'modern' but great quality is Sholdt. I might look at their engagement ring styles and see if anything "pops" out at you. Brian Gavin carries their stuff, but not all of their products are listed on the BG site, so I might start with the Sholdt site and go from there. Sholdt settings aren't cheap by any means, but since you dont have a specific budget I thought I'd mention them as a possibility.


http://sholdtdesign.com

http://www.briangavindiamonds.com/designer/sholdt/
 

cjbills

Rough_Rock
Joined
Mar 17, 2016
Messages
19
Wow, you guys are actually starting to make me think I might want to involve her in picking and designing the ring - which wouldn't be the worst thing in the world...

I don't want to shoot from the hip on this kind of thing.
 

Wendylynne

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Feb 19, 2014
Messages
167
op,

does she have a best friend you can trust? My hubby was going to buy a round.. he spoke to my friends and found that Im an oval kind of gal.
 

cjbills

Rough_Rock
Joined
Mar 17, 2016
Messages
19
Wendylynne|1473204425|4073882 said:
op,

does she have a best friend you can trust? My hubby was going to buy a round.. he spoke to my friends and found that Im an oval kind of gal.
She definitely has friends that I could ask. Most of them are gay men and I would say that her girlfriends and her are quite opposites. My real concern would be that the cat would totally be out of the bag as soon as I mention something to one of her friends. I am absolutely certain they would talk - it's just part of the culture of her circle of friends.

Not the easiest situation to navigate - I actually think reaching out to her brother would maybe be the best call, but I still see that as a very likely surprise spoiler
 

FightGravity

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Mar 26, 2015
Messages
240
cjbills|1473199908|4073851 said:
Wow, you guys are actually starting to make me think I might want to involve her in picking and designing the ring - which wouldn't be the worst thing in the world...

I don't want to shoot from the hip on this kind of thing.
It is totally fine to involve her. I think it is actually very romantic, and bodes well for mutual decision-making in the relationship, to go shopping together to get a sense of what she likes. You can still make the final call, and surprise her. Or you can make the trip to shop for the ring the surprise and part of the proposal, if having a surprise is important to you.

if you want to do it on your own, you need to call in a ringer or at least give us a lot more info about her style/likes/lifestyle. There's really no close friend who can keep his/her mouth shut?? It's ok if they have a different style than she does, they just need to understand her style. I wouldn't rule out the gay men. Just pick whomever can keep a secret, if that is important to you.
 

mrs-b

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Aug 18, 2013
Messages
7,965
FightGravity|1473221680|4073972 said:
cjbills|1473199908|4073851 said:
Wow, you guys are actually starting to make me think I might want to involve her in picking and designing the ring - which wouldn't be the worst thing in the world...

I don't want to shoot from the hip on this kind of thing.
It is totally fine to involve her. I think it is actually very romantic, and bodes well for mutual decision-making in the relationship, to go shopping together to get a sense of what she likes. You can still make the final call, and surprise her. Or you can make the trip to shop for the ring the surprise and part of the proposal, if having a surprise is important to you.

if you want to do it on your own, you need to call in a ringer or at least give us a lot more info about her style/likes/lifestyle. There's really no close friend who can keep his/her mouth shut?? It's ok if they have a different style than she does, they just need to understand her style. I wouldn't rule out the gay men. Just pick whomever can keep a secret, if that is important to you.
cjbills -

"Honey, I love you, and I'd like to take you shopping for the engagement ring of your dreams"...are possibly the most romantic words in the world! Let her join in the process and make it more than just a brief opening of a box / 'Surprise!' kind of moment.

Ring shopping is FUN - especially with a man who engages with the process and enters into the excitement rather than puts out a 'can't you pick one already so we can be DONE' kinda vibe. If you make her feel like it's ok to take her time, try on every ring in the store, and if you've already done some homework so you can be the one to steer her away from bad deals, poor vendors, lifeless diamonds or shoddy workmanship - you will be a hero in her eyes forever!

Tell us your general geographical area and we'll direct you to some great places. Then sit back and wait for the fireworks. (all the good kind!)

What you need to know going in is your budget, some good vendors, and a working knowledge of stats for diamonds (you can always print these out and take them with you). Start with breakfast (where you propose). Make a day of it. Take roses. End with dinner. This is not a precisely horrible day for a girl... :bigsmile:
 

cjbills

Rough_Rock
Joined
Mar 17, 2016
Messages
19
mrs-b|1473259650|4074074 said:
FightGravity|1473221680|4073972 said:
cjbills|1473199908|4073851 said:
Wow, you guys are actually starting to make me think I might want to involve her in picking and designing the ring - which wouldn't be the worst thing in the world...

I don't want to shoot from the hip on this kind of thing.
It is totally fine to involve her. I think it is actually very romantic, and bodes well for mutual decision-making in the relationship, to go shopping together to get a sense of what she likes. You can still make the final call, and surprise her. Or you can make the trip to shop for the ring the surprise and part of the proposal, if having a surprise is important to you.

if you want to do it on your own, you need to call in a ringer or at least give us a lot more info about her style/likes/lifestyle. There's really no close friend who can keep his/her mouth shut?? It's ok if they have a different style than she does, they just need to understand her style. I wouldn't rule out the gay men. Just pick whomever can keep a secret, if that is important to you.
cjbills -

"Honey, I love you, and I'd like to take you shopping for the engagement ring of your dreams"...are possibly the most romantic words in the world! Let her join in the process and make it more than just a brief opening of a box / 'Surprise!' kind of moment.

Ring shopping is FUN - especially with a man who engages with the process and enters into the excitement rather than puts out a 'can't you pick one already so we can be DONE' kinda vibe. If you make her feel like it's ok to take her time, try on every ring in the store, and if you've already done some homework so you can be the one to steer her away from bad deals, poor vendors, lifeless diamonds or shoddy workmanship - you will be a hero in her eyes forever!

Tell us your general geographical area and we'll direct you to some great places. Then sit back and wait for the fireworks. (all the good kind!)

What you need to know going in is your budget, some good vendors, and a working knowledge of stats for diamonds (you can always print these out and take them with you). Start with breakfast (where you propose). Make a day of it. Take roses. End with dinner. This is not a precisely horrible day for a girl... :bigsmile:
Ok, this definitely warms me to the idea.

I am in the Orlando FL area. Does anybody have a good shop around here? I suppose making the day out of it means I could head to Miami too
 

mrs-b

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Aug 18, 2013
Messages
7,965
cjbills -

Time to start a new thread called "Looking for PS approved vendors in the Orlando/Miami area." Hopefully people will chime in when they see that topic heading.
 
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