Nope. I would not feel comfortable. I am all for not judging. But enjoying my hospitality while probably cheating on their spouse is not something that I need going on around me and my family. Too much drama, heightened emotion, etc. I would feel uncomfortable. And it also is not the way a friend should treat you. (or me).momhappy|1480445654|4103486 said:If you had a strong suspicion that a visiting friend (who stayed with you) cheated on their spouse the last time they visited/stayed with you, would you feel comfortable having them stay with you in the future?
Yeah, I would not be cool with that at all. That puts you in a really awkward position if/when the spouse finds out, not to mention it's just rude.momhappy|1480463472|4103570 said:Monarch - this would not be considered the I-made-a-huge-mistake-drunken hook-up type of cheating. The cheating would be planned, but not the main reason for the visit (so, they weren't using me just to cheat, but it was worked into the "schedule" during the visit). Again, I have no proof, but I'm also not stupid.
Oh brother!momhappy|1480448402|4103499 said:I'm not judging and I don't consider it any of my business, but that doesn't change the fact that it might make me feel uncomfortable about inviting them to stay in the future.
I guess I'm not as concerned with the details. Yes, I'm (casual) friends with the spouse, but again, I have no intention of doing anything other than making decisions about whether or not this person stays with us again (I haven't really thought of it in terms of talking to the spouse, ending the friendship, etc.).marymm|1480522753|4103751 said:Yeah, this is a tough situation.
On the one hand, if it is a long-time friend, I'd hesitate to pass judgment based on suspicions (no matter how well-founded).
On the other hand, if it were me in this situation, I'd want to consider what my (and my DH's) answers would be to these kinds of questions:
- Is the guy your DH's friend and then became yours, or vice versa?
- Was the guy your/DH's friend well before he got married?
- Is the wife a good friend of yours?
- Are there mixed loyalties involved?
- Do/would you feel constrained talking with the wife about the friend's schedule/goings-on while he stays/stayed with you?
- If the friend is indeed cheating on his wife, does that mean he isn't your friend anymore in your eyes?