One of my daughter''s friends died today...

[snowflakeluvr]

My 21yr old daughter had a male pal from high school-he would be 20 this month. They went to different universities but were big on the texting thing lol. He played football at a D3 college, and apparently had an injury that required a same-day surgery scope of his hip this morning. His blood pressure fell and he died. He was a big(in girth) lineman and healthy or so they thought. He had texted my daughter two days ago and said "Hey there". She did not respond because she works a midnite-8am job and was getting ready for work. She has been crying all evening. He was one of those lovable, happy, cute teddy bear types(I substitute taught when she was in jr. high so I knew him well and he played baseball one season with my son). He just told my daughter a couple of weeks ago that she is one of the prettiest girls he''s ever known(She was flattered but looked at him as more of a pesky brother type). We now live in Michigan, we had lived in Ohio so my daughter(who lives in Indiana) is hoping to go to the service. I can''t imagine and pray that his parents can get through this. I guess he was the apple of the grandparents eyes

. So sad-his older brother facebooked and said, "Josh would want you to live life to the fullest." I just keep tearing up thinking about how I probably could never survive this....

 

[lilylover]

Oh my. My heart goes out to his family and your daughter. I will say a prayer for them tonight.

 

[asscherisme]

Oh no, thats horrible. What an awful tragedy. His poor family. I hope your daughter can make it to the service. Losing a child is every parents worst fear.

 

[Kaleigh]

OOOh my heart breaks for you daughter and his family. Those linebackers are such teddy bears and dear souls. Our best friends son is a line backer for UVA.

My prayers go to his family and to your daughter to cope with this devastating loss. It's going to take a lot of healing and prayers to get through this loss.

Thanks for letting us know. I will keep ALL in my prayers. I am soooo sorry.

 

[Haven]

I''m so sorry for your loss.
Your daughter, this young man, and his family are in my thoughts.

 

[jas]

My heart broke reading this. I am so sorry and send you, your family, and his family all the love and hugs you need. How tragic.

 

[somethingshiny]

How tragic. More prayers for comfort and strength for all of his family and friends. I hope your daughter is able to find some closure.

 

[geckodani]

You, your daughter and her friend''s family are in my prayers.

 

[icekid]

Losing a young person is always tragic and so difficult. My thoughts and prayers to his family and yours, as well.

 

[packrat]

Oh how awful! Thoughts and prayers to your daughter and the young man''s family!

 

[Porridge]

How tragic. My heart goes out to his family and friends, and your daughter.

 

[OUpearlgirl]

I''m so very sorry for your loss. When my younger sister lost a best friend she went to a grief support group and it helped tremendously. I cannot remember the name of it, but I believe it was a nationwide program with different meetings for different types of loss (suicide, spouse, etc). If you are interested I can try to get the name.

Again, my heart goes out to you, your daughter, and his family.

 

[yssie]

Oh, no

My thoughts are with your daughter and her friend''s family.

 

[Skippy123]

Oh gosh I am so sorry; that is so tragic. Hugs to your dear daughter and you.

 

[marcy]

How awful and sad for his family and friends.

 

[Burk]

So sorry!

 

[Smurfysmiles]

I was about your daughter''s age when I lost a friend and boyfriend of 8 years. It''s SO hard and I am assuming this is the first loss she''s had so close to her as a friend and so close to her age. I can''t speak for you daughter but I just remember that I spent a lot of time crying in my bedroom. It took me almost 3 years to really get through the grief process. Just be patient and if she needs to talk she will but I think a lot of times people keep to themselves because they are still processing their emotions and thoughts. Does she have a favorite meal you could make one night? Comfort foods definitely help and anything else that might make her feel good (the smallest things will help, i remember I came home to visit my parents a few weekends after it happened and my mom had bought me a couple books she knew I was thinking of getting, it helped to take my mind off of things). Your daughter is definitely in my thoughts as well as her friend that she lost *hugs*

 

[snowflakeluvr]

Thank you all for such comforting words. He was just such a NICE kid. More and more stories emerging about how great of a young man he was. The service is in Ohio on Sat. They are actually holding it at my daughter''s high school(and Josh''s) gymnasium. I think it''s going to be huge. I live in Michigan. She graduated from Purdue but still living in Lafayette, working, so I am going to take my two little ones to my college son(who''s 19 and in Ohio) and have him and his girlfriend babysit Sat while we go to the funeral. I think my daughter really needs to be there. She keeps asking herself, "why didn''t I respond to his last text?" I tell her that maybe Josh''s work was done here and God needed him up there, for comic relief . My 19yr old son is type 1 diabetic and yet I have NEVER challenged God over the whys of it. I have my child, he''s HERE and we''ll get through any struggles which may come his way down the road(but praying for a cure!). Makes you realize that the trivial bs in life is just that. My daughter has been deeply affected so I told her that good will come out of this. My heart breaks for his parents and his brother, grandparents, etc. You are all so sweet and I truly wish I had more time to participate in this awesome community!

 

[MichelleCarmen]

What sad news. I''m so sorry. My thoughts and prayers go out to you, your daughter and Josh''s family. Hugs!

 

[Gayletmom]

I am so sorry to hear this terrible news. It''s so sad when someone so young dies. Please give your daughter a hug and know that we are all praying for you and for Josh''s family.

 

[Bliss]

I''m so sorry to hear that. Your daughter must be heartbroken. Thoughts and prayers to your family and to theirs.

 

[snlee]

Such sad news. I am very sorry.

 

[AGBF]

Date: 1/4/2010 11:55:24 PM
Author:snowflakeluvr

My 21yr old daughter had a male pal from high school-he would be 20 this month. They went to different universities but were big on the texting thing lol. He played football at a D3 college, and apparently had an injury that required a same-day surgery scope of his hip this morning. His blood pressure fell and he died.

I am very sorry, snowflakeluvr. I have not been reading Family, Home & Health lately or I would have responded sooner. It is terrible when a young person dies, especially someone who is so nice and kind. My heart goes out to you and your daughter.

AGBF

 

[Italiahaircolor]

Oh no...I am so sorry...what heartbreak for everyone involved...

I wish your daughter peace and comfort...time heals all.

 

[makemepretty]

I don''t know how any parent deals with the loss of a child. No matter what age they pass at, it would never be ok because they will always be your "child". How do you even manage to go on? I hope your daughter can deal with this also. It''s just heartbreaking.

 

[snowflakeluvr]

I tried to post Sunday night but it would not let me. My daughter and I attended the funeral last Saturday in Ohio. It was held in the high school gymnasium and probably had about 450 in attendance. Apparently at the visitation the night before(in the high school auditorium), there were thousands....

I briefly met the mother and since I had substitute taught her son, I knew that she would most likely not know me. I have a hard to pronounce Polish last name so I always told the kids to call me "Mrs J". When I told her that I was Mrs. J, she seemed to recognized that. I was so glad to be there for HER, as I have five kids and as a mother, I can''t imagine.

The funeral was amazing-a Presbyterian service, Scriptures, hymns, two pastors spoke, Josh''s uncle and his older brother. Wow! I told my Monica that I hope when I die, that things like that are said about me. Apparently, Josh was just an amazing, faithful, kind, funny, happy, stick-it-to-you, hard working, never give up, kinda guy. his brother said, "Josh always made you feel welcome, like you fit in. We need to go out and accept others, just like Josh would."

The very last thing was the hardest-about 2 dozen football players from Wabash Colllege, Indiana (where he was a sophomore and played football) stood up and sang the Wabash fight son. The mother lost it and so did everyone else! I swear that the sun came out, after we left, we did not go to the cemetery, and it just felt like Josh was there, ya know?

My daughter and I still cry over it-and I told her, either it will be forgotten by people, or it will leave a mark on you that changes you, hopefully for the better. I can''t imagine his mother''s grief or what it would feel like to walk into your baby''s room and feel that emptiness. I pray that I am never challenged in that way. I don''t know if I could show as much grace as his mom did.

Thank you all for being so empathetic and caring. You are amazing. Love begets more love.....