My uncle just got married...again

[Dreamer_D]

Yup, this is his 8th "true love", fifth engagement, and his third marriage all within the last 10 years. The second marriage within a 2 year period. Seriously, it is becoming a bit of a joke in the family. His second wife he married after knowing her only 3 weeks. She came to my wedding and was in all the family photos... they got divorced about 3 months later. So we photoshopped her out of the family portrait

You really can''t even tell she was there!

He is a wonderful man in so many ways -- handsome, charming, educated-- but this serial manogamy is a little much. To his credit, he always chooses such wonderful, smart, educated, classy women... I hope this new one lasts! I was going to feel a little bad for her, since she can''t know completely what she is getting in to, but at the least she will get citizenship out of the marriage, so it is a win-win for her whether it lasts or not

.

We are supposed to call and offer him congratulations but it is getting really hard to take it seriously! Each one is perfect, THE ONE, the love of his life. I''d really like to see how he rationalizes things given that he says that every time, but we aren''t that close.

Do you have anyone in your family like this? How do you keep a straight face?

 

[asscherisme]

Well, if you like her, just enjoy her company when you see them and be nice to them. He is not asking for advice so I would not give it. Sounds like he has made some bad choices but I would just be nice to them and be your self.

When you call, just say congratulations. Simple.

I don''t but my neighbor was telling me the other day about her brother in law getting married for the 5th time and how they are going to the wedding and its become a family joie.

 

[iheartscience]

Hahaha I love your description! Well, at least he''s not cynical, right? He''s a hopeless romantic!

 

[April20]

Eh, reminds me of my sister. Every man she meets, she's in love with within 3 weeks. They're always "so cute" and her "true love". The only difference is she's only married one of them.... so far..... That one lasted a while and ended badly. When I got married, she was gushing about how exciting it was that I was the first one getting married. My parents looked at her and said, "Um.... remember Eddie???". Her response? Oh, he doesn't count. They were married for three years!

She was dating a guy she met at the gym.... He spoke some English and lived with parents and siblings in a three bedroom apartment. He wasn't supposed to be dating anyone, much less a blonde american like her. When they finally broke up, my dad asked her why they broke up, he was soooo cute (her words). Her response? "I know. That's what we had in common." Every time she says something like this, I have this vision of a Street Car Named Desire and start yelling "Steeeeeeeeeeeeeeeelllllllllllllllllllaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa" in my head.

It's been like this for years. The last year she's actually been with the same guy. If you don't count the 147 times they've broken up (her words again).

Good work on photoshopping the ex-wife out of your photos!

 

[bee*]

The only person that I ever had like that was my great-uncle. He was dating P for years and then he met M. He began to date M but him and P stayed together as well and in the end they actually shared him for over 25 years until he died. It was strange in that P and M were so completely different from each other but he thought that each of them were perfect in their own way. Your uncle obviously falls in love/lust quickly! Hopefully this one will last!

 

[somethingshiny]

I understand the "joke" aspect, but think of how he must go through life--always in love and on cloud 9. Granted, maybe he should think harder on the vows, but being in love is a wonderful feeling. Looks like he''s easily able to find the good in people.

I would definitely call and offer Best wishes. You never know, this might REALLY be the one and you don''t want to screw up your relationship with her from the get-go.

 

[Dreamer_D]

Sorry I went out of town after I started this!

I will call and offer best wishes, it is really no skin off my nose at all! I say good for him! But in the back of my mind it is hard not to snicker a little...

Funny about the idea that he goes through life always on cloud 9 and in love! LOL! Maybe true. I suspect he spends and equal amount of time on the decline side of relationships though. On the whole it must be a more dramatic life than I lead.

 

[onvacation]

Dreamer, wow at first I thought you were saying this would be his 8th marriage in addition to five broken engagements, and was about to say he''s even more popular than Elizabeth Taylor!

There was an article in the latest issue of Cosmo about being the "third wife." In that one, the guy got married twice while he was really young, then waited about ten years for the next marriage. I thought it was heartening to see he didn''t swear off women completely, and still had faith in love. But it sounds like a somewhat different case with your uncle? In any case, they probably are aware of how their situation must sound to other people. I agree with the others that it would be a good idea to be nice in general, and try your best to keep a straight face. At the wedding, think "what would Skippy do? hehe


P.S. April, I really hope I''m reading this the wrong way? It comes off to me as a rather strange thing to say...

Date: 5/8/2009 4:57:00 PM
Author: April20

She was dating a guy she met at the gym.... He spoke some English and lived with parents and siblings in a three bedroom apartment. He wasn''t supposed to be dating anyone, much less a blonde american like her.

 

[Dreamer_D]

Date: 5/10/2009 11:51:45 PM
Author: onvacation
Dreamer, wow at first I thought you were saying this would be his 8th marriage in addition to five broken engagements, and was about to say he''s even more popular than Elizabeth Taylor!

There was an article in the latest issue of Cosmo about being the ''third wife.'' In that one, the guy got married twice while he was really young, then waited about ten years for the next marriage. I thought it was heartening to see he didn''t swear off women completely, and still had faith in love. But it sounds like a somewhat different case with your uncle? In any case, they probably are aware of how their situation must sound to other people. I agree with the others that it would be a good idea to be nice in general, and try your best to keep a straight face. At the wedding, think ''what would Skippy do? hehe


P.S. April, I really hope I''m reading this the wrong way? It comes off to me as a rather strange thing to say...

Date: 5/8/2009 4:57:00 PM
Author: April20

She was dating a guy she met at the gym.... He spoke some English and lived with parents and siblings in a three bedroom apartment. He wasn''t supposed to be dating anyone, much less a blonde american like her.

I hope she knows all about his other relationships. But how can she marry someone with such a tendency to marry quickly? I don''t know if I could overlook that past and say, "It will be different this time, gosh darnit!" LOL!

Re: April''s comment... I think it makes sense if the man in question is from a culture where the family feels strongly about marrying "one of our own". I have dated men where they kept their relationship with me a secret because I wasn''t of their same culture

Needless to say, those relationships didn''t last very long.

 

[April20]

Date: 5/11/2009 7:32:36 AM
Author: dreamer_dachsie

Date: 5/10/2009 11:51:45 PM
Author: onvacation
Dreamer, wow at first I thought you were saying this would be his 8th marriage in addition to five broken engagements, and was about to say he''s even more popular than Elizabeth Taylor!

There was an article in the latest issue of Cosmo about being the ''third wife.'' In that one, the guy got married twice while he was really young, then waited about ten years for the next marriage. I thought it was heartening to see he didn''t swear off women completely, and still had faith in love. But it sounds like a somewhat different case with your uncle? In any case, they probably are aware of how their situation must sound to other people. I agree with the others that it would be a good idea to be nice in general, and try your best to keep a straight face. At the wedding, think ''what would Skippy do? hehe


P.S. April, I really hope I''m reading this the wrong way? It comes off to me as a rather strange thing to say...

Date: 5/8/2009 4:57:00 PM
Author: April20

She was dating a guy she met at the gym.... He spoke some English and lived with parents and siblings in a three bedroom apartment. He wasn''t supposed to be dating anyone, much less a blonde american like her.

I hope she knows all about his other relationships. But how can she marry someone with such a tendency to marry quickly? I don''t know if I could overlook that past and say, ''It will be different this time, gosh darnit!'' LOL!

Re: April''s comment... I think it makes sense if the man in question is from a culture where the family feels strongly about marrying ''one of our own''. I have dated men where they kept their relationship with me a secret because I wasn''t of their same culture

Needless to say, those relationships didn''t last very long.

I think their relationship lasted about six weeks. She always referred to him as her "secret, forbidden love". She''s a crazy girl!!

 

[Italiahaircolor]

I guess I can see where you''re coming from...

But in the end I guess it has to boil down to "live and let live". His marriage doesn''t directly effect you...it has no negative effect on your well being or your life...so I''d just try to be happy for them.

Some people are addicted to love, it''s true. He may love the way being married feels, being in love feels...and as a grown man, he has the right to pursue that if that is what he wishes to do. Clearly you''re not going to talk sense in to him, the deed is already done...so I''d just suggest just going with the flow. There are plenty of bigger issues to worry about in this world!

 

[MonkeyPie]

Does he have one kid from each woman, or more? That would be the only downside I could see to this - I imagine that after all this time he has them sign a pre-nup so he doesn''t get ripped. Whatever makes him happy!

 

[Dreamer_D]

Oh don't get me wrong, I don't really *care* that he is married again! I think it is funny, that's all! We all have a good natured laugh about it in the family, just not to his face

Something interesting was that when he and my DH went running together the last time we were all together, he spent a lot of time assuring my DH that he was NOT a misogynist despite what the family might think! LOL! We don't think he is sexist or anything, just a little tempermental and tough to live with...

No kids with these women, which is sad for him actually since he would have loved to be a biological father. One of the engagements was a relatively long-term relationship with kids that he step-parented, and it is sad they are not in touch anymore. This current wife has a 7 or 8 year old, which is part of the appeal for my uncle. He is a great guy, just can't maintain a relationship... he's not so different from many good people out there. My mom hasn't been engaged or married, but she has had just as many boyfriends! I think it is the speedy marriages that crack us up.

But he is still the Liz Taylor in the family

 

[MichelleCarmen]

lol to the photoshopping. Oh, well, at least your family has someone to entertain you all!

In your shoes, I would call and congratulate him, but as far as a wedding gift goes, possibly only give a card!

Since this is PS, I have to ask what does he do as far as rings go? Does he propose to each gal with a diamond eng. ring?

 

[Dreamer_D]

Date: 5/11/2009 12:30:08 PM
Author: MC
lol to the photoshopping. Oh, well, at least your family has someone to entertain you all!

In your shoes, I would call and congratulate him, but as far as a wedding gift goes, possibly only give a card!

Since this is PS, I have to ask what does he do as far as rings go? Does he propose to each gal with a diamond eng. ring?

You know, I don''t know! I have only met one of the women so I will have to check it out when I meet this one this summer! We live far from one another and see each other only every few years!

 

[DivaDiamond007]

Dreamer - I have a similar uncle.....

Was married to Wife #1, she has an affair so he divorced her and married Wife #2. He adopted her child from a previous relationship and she was preggo when they got married. They were only together a few years and then got divorced. A few months later he was married to Wife #3 and they had a baby together not long after. She got weird so they got divorced and now he''s living with some (older) woman and her teenage son in his trailer. They''re not married yet but only time will tell. I feel bad for my uncle since he''s a nice guy, he just can''t seem to find a decent woman!

 

[Dreamer_D]

Date: 5/11/2009 2:50:30 PM
Author: DivaDiamond007
Dreamer - I have a similar uncle.....

Was married to Wife #1, she has an affair so he divorced her and married Wife #2. He adopted her child from a previous relationship and she was preggo when they got married. They were only together a few years and then got divorced. A few months later he was married to Wife #3 and they had a baby together not long after. She got weird so they got divorced and now he''s living with some (older) woman and her teenage son in his trailer. They''re not married yet but only time will tell. I feel bad for my uncle since he''s a nice guy, he just can''t seem to find a decent woman!

I think there are many many people with love lives like this! I don''t think this is the problem for my uncle, though, since the women have all been wonderful people!