My new beauty - 4.01 J VS1 in Erika Winters' Margot

[canuk-gal]

I looooove the diamond with the akoya pearl stack!

You had me at the wine.

 

[MissGotRocks]

@MissGotRocks, @MakingTheGrade, @Tonks, @KristyDarling, @hearts-arrows_girl, @lioness88 Thank you all so much!!

So… I’m gathering my thoughts as I type this out, sorry in advance for what's probably going to be a pretty meandering post...

For as long as I've thought about bling I’ve held this notion that my engagement ring should be my most valuable piece. I don’t know when or where I got that idea, it's just always been one of my bling #Truths and I never questioned it. And for over a decade it worked out just fine, since there wasn’t anything I valued more than the idea of The End All Be All Engagement Ring.

A couple years ago I started planning out a long term wishlist in a spreadsheet - and of course I listed upgrading this ring as a top priority! Not urgent. I'd have to save up for a good while. But definitely important. But at the same time I knew from the first moment I thought about it that it would be a mammothly expensive and time-consuming stressfest I'm nitpicky and pedantic and I'd want basically *everything* about my current stone replicated exactly as is, just bigger... Just finding someone to do that sort of custom work would be a whole #Project unto itself.

So now this expensive and time-consuming stressfest is lurking in the background, and guilt looms over all other jewellery that I buy. New bracelet? You know, you really should have put that money aside for The Upgrade. New eternity? Investing in The Upgrade would really be much more sensible. Talk about a pointless and archaic self-inflicted guilt trip.

A friend recently rehomed a bigger diamond, and she used the funds to buy a totally different type of piece that she’s wanted for years. And she’s so legit happy with her decision. That made me think about why I'm so convinced that upgrading a diamond that I’m perfectly happy with is the "right" way to spend my sparkle money. And, y'know. When I put it like that. Even to myself.

And a few weeks back I admitted that even if the money for my ideal upgrade appeared in an envelope under the door - I wouldn't want to spend it on a new diamond! I'd rather have a velvety unoiled emerald, or a vivid harlequin opal, or any number of branded pieces. So I decided to put The Upgrade off for a few years. Would be nice for a big birthday, hopefully diamond prices will stabilize by then, etc., etc., etc. Quelled the immediate angsting. But, like, why am I still playing games with myself? There isn't a soul on this planet who cares how I divvy my jewellery expenses up So yeah, I like big diamonds, but if The Upgrade project scares me more than it excites me then what the heck am I doing?

So I've just scrubbed the whole thing from my wishlist. Maybe one day I'll want a bigger stone again. But I'm *sure* that right now, and for the forseeable future, I don't want another stone if it means giving this beauty up. Does being genuinely satisfied with a six year old diamond mean I've cured my own DSS?

I love that you have the good sense to acknowledge the truths you feel rather than stick to a ‘I must do’ framework. Your diamond is gorgeous and as much as I love diamonds, I do think they can reach a point of being too large. Large to garner attention but so large that they lose their detail and appeal to the wearer. We all know that we are allowed to change our minds - and you might in the future - but for now I am glad to hear you say you will enjoy it without whipping yourself over other jewelry choices. Trying to find a duplicate - just larger - probably won’t work because you are particular and exacting. Knowing oneself and acknowledging the information is a core value in life that many never achieve. Kudos to you with love and admiration!!

 

[yssie]

I also love seeing some skin even if you have a large center stone with side stones LOL! It turned out great alone though. Was just curious thanks for sharing!

Yes! That’s exactly what I wanted - to see a sliver of skin on both sides of the diamond, when looking at the ring with both eyes!

 

[AllAboardTheBlingTrain]

@MissGotRocks, @MakingTheGrade, @Tonks, @KristyDarling, @hearts-arrows_girl, @lioness88 Thank you all so much!!

So… I’m gathering my thoughts as I type this out, sorry in advance for what's probably going to be a pretty meandering post...

For as long as I've thought about bling I’ve held this notion that my engagement ring should be my most valuable piece. I don’t know when or where I got that idea, it's just always been one of my bling #Truths and I never questioned it. And for over a decade it worked out just fine, since there wasn’t anything I valued more than the idea of The End All Be All Engagement Ring.

A couple years ago I started planning out a long term wishlist in a spreadsheet - and of course I listed upgrading this ring as a top priority! Not urgent. I'd have to save up for a good while. But definitely important. But at the same time I knew from the first moment I thought about it that it would be a mammothly expensive and time-consuming stressfest I'm nitpicky and pedantic and I'd want basically *everything* about my current stone replicated exactly as is, just bigger... Just finding someone to do that sort of custom work would be a whole #Project unto itself.

So now this expensive and time-consuming stressfest is lurking in the background, and guilt looms over all other jewellery that I buy. New bracelet? You know, you really should have put that money aside for The Upgrade. New eternity? Investing in The Upgrade would really be much more sensible. Talk about a pointless and archaic self-inflicted guilt trip.

A friend recently rehomed a bigger diamond, and she used the funds to buy a totally different type of piece that she’s wanted for years. And she’s so legit happy with her decision. That made me think about why I'm so convinced that upgrading a diamond that I’m perfectly happy with is the "right" way to spend my sparkle money. And, y'know. When I put it like that. Even to myself.

And a few weeks back I admitted that even if the money for my ideal upgrade appeared in an envelope under the door - I wouldn't want to spend it on a new diamond! I'd rather have a velvety unoiled emerald, or a vivid harlequin opal, or any number of branded pieces. So I decided to put The Upgrade off for a few years. Would be nice for a big birthday, hopefully diamond prices will stabilize by then, etc., etc., etc. Quelled the immediate angsting. But, like, why am I still playing games with myself? There isn't a soul on this planet who cares how I divvy my jewellery expenses up So yeah, I like big diamonds, but if The Upgrade project scares me more than it excites me then what the heck am I doing?

So I've just scrubbed the whole thing from my wishlist. Maybe one day I'll want a bigger stone again. But I'm *sure* that right now, and for the forseeable future, I don't want another stone if it means giving this beauty up. Does being genuinely satisfied with a six year old diamond mean I've cured my own DSS?

Your stone is just gorgeous! I can see why you don’t want to upgrade - you wouldn’t want it to be the one that got away!!

I do have a possible suggestion, since you said that you’re happy to just have this one and not go bigger… I don’t think you should ever rehome this stone. Perhaps acquiring another bigger one in addition to this one can be on your eventual wishlist (wants and budget aligning, of course) to be worn as a RHR, or, if you think you wouldn’t wear more than one large diamond ring, you can convert this beautiful stone into a pendant or bracelet at that point.

That’s what many people I know did! Best way to have your cake and eat it too (though of course, at a not-insubstantial cost increase, but that’s why you could save it for a milestone anniversary or birthday).

 

[yssie]

Gosh, I love all of your stack combo's & I'm not sure how I missed them??!

This really, REALLY is a beautiful diamond. I am so glad you are going to stick with it for a while.

I love that you have the good sense to acknowledge the truths you feel rather than stick to a ‘I must do’ framework. Your diamond is gorgeous and as much as I love diamonds, I do think they can reach a point of being too large. Large to garner attention but so large that they lose their detail and appeal to the wearer. We all know that we are allowed to change our minds - and you might in the future - but for now I am glad to hear you say you will enjoy it without whipping yourself over other jewelry choices. Trying to find a duplicate - just larger - probably won’t work because you are particular and exacting. Knowing oneself and acknowledging the information is a core value in life that many never achieve. Kudos to you with love and admiration!!

As soon as I hit submit on my last post I stuck an 11mm CZ into a ring holder and tried it on and thought “hey that does looks pretty nice, maybe I shouldn’t have said all of that”

But you’re both right! I wouldn’t be able to just have a stone custom cut by one of the PS boutique precision-cutting vendors - the proportions I want are outside all of their acceptance ranges for their H&A lines. And… Even though I said that I’d basically want my current stone expanded… I don’t know if that’s actually the case. I’d want a new stone with my current stone’s personality. But we all know facet size can hugely change behaviour! So the reality of what I’m asking for might be a bit different, and I haven’t a clue how to go about predicting those needs. I don’t trust simulations. And I don’t have the budget for more than one attempt. And I don’t have the intestinal fortitude for more than one cut/recut. Three for three this was a bad idea waiting to happen. If one day I want another stone it’ll just have to be a second diamond. No risking upgrading this one

I’m so curious to see what happens with the lab market. Labs are still much too pricey for me to want to put any real money into, but if they keep dropping maybe I’ll get myself a collection of differently-flavoured and unrepentantly-gauchely-oversized honker MRBs one day

 

[yssie]

Your stone is just gorgeous! I can see why you don’t want to upgrade - you wouldn’t want it to be the one that got away!!

I do have a possible suggestion, since you said that you’re happy to just have this one and not go bigger… I don’t think you should ever rehome this stone. Perhaps acquiring another bigger one in addition to this one can be on your eventual wishlist (wants and budget aligning, of course) to be worn as a RHR, or, if you think you wouldn’t wear more than one large diamond ring, you can convert this beautiful stone into a pendant or bracelet at that point.

That’s what many people I know did! Best way to have your cake and eat it too (though of course, at a not-insubstantial cost increase, but that’s why you could save it for a milestone anniversary or birthday).

Yes. I agree!! I’ll be keeping this ring intact for as long as it fits me. I’ll just have to get a second diamond if one day I want one. Oh, the hardship

The cost outlay for a second stone is definitely daunting. But realistically the takeaway for I wanted to do with an upgrade-and-recut was daunting as well, even with the trade in credit, I’m sure the specialty custom cutting requirement wouldn’t have come cheap - so at this point it’s just degrees of #daunted. (My husband is reading over my shoulder and told me to change #daunted to #thwarted. )

Maybe a second ring one day. Another MRB - I’m very partial to rounds, common as they are! Or a different shape. I think I’d also be open to getting a lab stone if prices decrease substantially? But for now - other gemstones first

 

[AllAboardTheBlingTrain]

Yes. I agree!! I’ll be keeping this ring intact for as long as it fits me. I’ll just have to get a second diamond if one day I want one. Oh, the hardship

The cost outlay for a second stone is definitely daunting. But realistically the takeaway for I wanted to do with an upgrade-and-recut was daunting as well, even with the trade in credit, I’m sure the specialty custom cutting requirement wouldn’t have come cheap - so at this point it’s just degrees of #daunted. (My husband is reading over my shoulder and told me to change #daunted to #thwarted. )

Maybe a second ring one day. Another MRB - I’m very partial to rounds, common as they are! Or a different shape. I think I’d also be open to getting a lab stone if prices decrease substantially? But for now - other gemstones first

I think a second shape could also work if you plan to keep both as rings!! There’s no chance of your rings competing with each other then.

(As for your husband, well, never say never. I’m sure you could convince him if you really wanted )

 

[MissGotRocks]

As soon as I hit submit on my last post I stuck an 11mm CZ into a ring holder and tried it on and thought “hey that does looks pretty nice, maybe I shouldn’t have said all of that”

But you’re both right! I wouldn’t be able to just have a stone custom cut by one of the PS boutique precision-cutting vendors - the proportions I want are outside all of their acceptance ranges for their H&A lines. And… Even though I said that I’d basically want my current stone expanded… I don’t know if that’s actually the case. I’d want a new stone with my current stone’s personality. But we all know facet size can hugely change behaviour! So the reality of what I’m asking for might be a bit different, and I haven’t a clue how to go about predicting those needs. I don’t trust simulations. And I don’t have the budget for more than one attempt. And I don’t have the intestinal fortitude for more than one cut/recut. Three for three this was a bad idea waiting to happen. If one day I want another stone it’ll just have to be a second diamond. No risking upgrading this one

I’m so curious to see what happens with the lab market. Labs are still much too pricey for me to want to put any real money into, but if they keep dropping maybe I’ll get myself a collection of differently-flavoured and unrepentantly-gauchely-oversized honker MRBs one day

Nah, nothing that would outshine the current one. Can’t see you with a big MRB lab created diamond larger than your current ring - that might be a bridge too far! Would not be in keeping with the thought that the ering should be the piece above all else - lol! Perhaps another shape? Lol!

 

[yssie]

Nah, nothing that would outshine the current one. Can’t see you with a big MRB lab created diamond larger than your current ring - that might be a bridge too far! Would not be in keeping with the thought that the ering should be the piece above all else - lol! Perhaps another shape? Lol!

Ain’t that the truth

 

[LLJsmom]

@yssie my biggest concern with your process to upgrade is finding this stone but bigger. Like you said, even if you were willing to take the risk of a custom cutting project it would be hard to find a cutter that would be willing to cut to your specific parameters. If you happened to come across it, maybe then you can consider it. But your stone is so annoyingly perfect for you, and that is no mean feat, trying to force it into existence would be so hard and potentially after lots of money, time and hard work, unsuccessful. Sorry don’t mean to be a party-pooper.

 

[yssie]

@yssie my biggest concern with your process to upgrade is finding this stone but bigger. Like you said, even if you were willing to take the risk of a custom cutting project it would be hard to find a cutter that would be willing to cut to your specific parameters. If you happened to come across it, maybe then you can consider it. But your stone is so annoyingly perfect for you, and that is no mean feat, trying to force it into existence would be so hard and potentially after lots of money, time and hard work, unsuccessful. Sorry don’t mean to be a party-pooper.

That’s not party pooping at all. It’s just honest!! And I kind of knew it all along, I just didn’t want to admit it!

And y’all know me… If I’m not happy with the result I’ll just worry it like a dog gnawing that last bit of marrow out of an hour-old bone. Really better to just not go there. Keeping this diamond is no hardship - I wore my ring today and I felt at peace looking at it

 

[LLJsmom]

That’s not party pooping at all. It’s just honest!! And I kind of knew it all along, I just didn’t want to admit it!

And y’all know me… If I’m not happy with the result I’ll just worry it like a dog gnawing that last bit of marrow out of an hour-old bone. Really better to just not go there. Keeping this diamond is no hardship - I wore my ring today and I felt at peace looking at it

I went back and watched another video of it. Your diamond is the definition of unicorn. It’s just truly amazing. It’s an OEC disguised as an MRB. The rainbow colored fire is off the charts and the edge to edge sparkle is ridiculous. It is literally blinding. I shouldnt impose my opinion on you and it’s what you are happy with that matters. It’s that your diamond and @missy ‘s OEC are the most two most beautiful diamonds I’ve ever seen IRL, including mine. I’d be so afraid to let it go.

 

[missy]

Oh my gosh, late to these new posts. First of all @yssie I adore your beautiful engagement ring. One word says it all...SWOON!

Second of all if I may share my thoughts...our needs and wants may change over the years and we do the best we can at the time.
Do what your heart desires without care or concern for what others might think.
I know we know this but sometimes it bears repeating.

There is absolutely no right or wrong when it comes to what makes our heart sing.
Our bling desires are just that. Our desires. No one else's.
So wear what brings you joy and do what makes you happy.
Right now.

That's all from me. My wish for you...may whatever you decide bring you peace and joy.

(And @LLJsmom thank you sweet friend. XOXO)

 

[MakingTheGrade]

Got to see this ring in person and it is AMAZING! So much more gorgeous in real life than in photos. the cut, color, size and setting are all perfection.

Also usually my personal color preference for MRBs is K or higher due to my skin tone making any visible yellow tint look terrible, but this is the whitest J I’ve ever seen. Wild!

 

[yssie]

Fun pic from a couple months ago - showing some blue fluor under the big bright blue stark North Dakota sky!! Graded GIA None & AGS Neg and I NEVER see it on the east coast. Outside of under the blacklight I mean. Mostly I just really like this pic of my ring and need to share






I've also definitively decided to never part with this ring. This stone just keeps growing on me - every year I love it a little bit more So I'll soothe the urge for #Bigger with another ring. Different shape - cushion, maybe EC. Hopefully this year. But this ring stays.

 

[Ibrakeforpossums]

Fun pic from a couple months ago - showing some blue fluor under the big bright blue stark North Dakota sky!! Graded GIA None & AGS Neg and I NEVER see it on the east coast. Outside of under the blacklight I mean. Mostly I just really like this pic of my ring and need to share






I've also definitively decided to never part with this ring. This stone just keeps growing on me - every year I love it a little bit more So I'll soothe the urge for #Bigger with another ring. Different shape - cushion, maybe EC. Hopefully this year. But this ring stays.

"A sliver of skin." I believe in this.

 

[Pomelo]

Fun pic from a couple months ago - showing some blue fluor under the big bright blue stark North Dakota sky!! Graded GIA None & AGS Neg and I NEVER see it on the east coast. Outside of under the blacklight I mean. Mostly I just really like this pic of my ring and need to share






I've also definitively decided to never part with this ring. This stone just keeps growing on me - every year I love it a little bit more So I'll soothe the urge for #Bigger with another ring. Different shape - cushion, maybe EC. Hopefully this year. But this ring stays.

Whilst I am *all* for the eye candy of multiple rings and bracelet stacks, there’s just something about the unadulterated simplicity of this.

Beautiful diamond solitaire.
Plain skinny band.
Round bangle with a hint of sparkle (is it the Tiffany Etoile?).

I can just imagine this combo looking just as good in a hundred years’ time as it does today

 

[yssie]

"A sliver of skin." I believe in this.

So much this!!
The things we discover amongst like-minded

 

[yssie]

Whilst I am *all* for the eye candy of multiple rings and bracelet stacks, there’s just something about the unadulterated simplicity of this.

Beautiful diamond solitaire.
Plain skinny band.
Round bangle with a hint of sparkle (is it the Tiffany Etoile?).

I can just imagine this combo looking just as good in a hundred years’ time as it does today

Thank you so much!

And yes - it is the etoile! I don't know why they deprecated the bangle, it's so easy and satisfying!

 

[Dreamer_D]

A true PSer wears their 4ct diamond for a hike in the mountains!!

 

[Tonks]

A true PSer wears their 4ct diamond for a hike in the mountains!!

Um, guilty.



@yssie your stone is so gorgeous. I’m so glad you will be keeping it!!!! It suits your hand perfectly, and I still just adore its light performance. I didn’t realize it had a bit of fluorescence—how cool to see it that way!!!

You know that all of us are willing to help you look for a stone to scratch the “bigger” itch!

 

[yssie]

A true PSer wears their 4ct diamond for a hike in the mountains!!

So I’m totally here for the way you makes me sound chic through all manner of rugged adventure… But if I’m honest I think that particular example was maybe a couple miles… And on very flat and cleared paths… I should shut up and just take the win

Um, guilty.

@yssie your stone is so gorgeous. I’m so glad you will be keeping it!!!! It suits your hand perfectly, and I still just adore its light performance. I didn’t realize it had a bit of fluorescence—how cool to see it that way!!!

You know that all of us are willing to help you look for a stone to scratch the “bigger” itch!

I just need about four more money trees!!

I got a new blacklight a few moths ago and it's much better than my old one. I believe this one is actually 365nm as advertised! The earrings have no fluor (one is GIA None and the other is AGS Neg) - they're purple because the blacklight background light is purple. That seems to be the case with all blacklights? The ring actively *glows* blue, though, it's not just washed in background purple. But... Under a direct blacklight is the only time I've ever seen its fluor... Never in a natural environment before. Great reminder to glop the sunscreen on out there



But this isn't my first experience with the labs' fluor grades being questionable. My first or second reset - same thing. I don't mind it, it's unintrusive and probably does have a slight brightening effect in everyday conditions. Would sure be nice if we could trust the lab reports blindly though!

 

[Dreamer_D]

Listen, we use the word “hike” liberally around these parts. Were you outside? Did you walk on dusty gravel or dirt for a bit? Were there trees and large plants and grasses about? Would it have been a good idea to have a water bottle? THATS A HIKE!

Is there a threshold for the degree of Fluor for even the “Nil” or “none” designation I wonder? Seems weird the labs would mess up something that seems very obvious like that. Not like color or clarity where there is such a degree of inherent subjectivity.

 

[yssie]

Listen, we use the word “hike” liberally around these parts. Were you outside? Did you walk on dusty gravel or dirt for a bit? Were there trees and large plants and grasses about? Would it have been a good idea to have a water bottle? THATS A HIKE!

Is there a threshold for the degree of Fluor for even the “Nil” or “none” designation I wonder? Seems weird the labs would mess up something that seems very obvious like that. Not like color or clarity where there is such a degree of inherent subjectivity.

Well, the water bottle douses any silly skepticism, doesn’t it? I *endured*. I *conquered*.

I’ve wondered about the fluor - I wasn’t ever able to get a straight answer out of either lab. Back when AGS was a lab. At least the old “negligible” nomenclature had some forgiveness built in. I’ve mentally put it down to some mix of SmallRangeOfFluorStrengthsPerLabel - just like you said - and different diamond grading docks being calibrated slightly differently, maybe imperfectly.

I think playing with pearls has made me more forgiving of other gemstones too. Like, I still see their quirks, I just don’t mind them nearly as much. I genuinely marvel at how much energy my younger self had for emotionally connecting with minutiae

 

[Dreamer_D]

I marvel at so many things my younger self did. I too have become less obsessive about so many things. I mean, I’m not exactly the Big Lebowski or anything but dabbling in old cuts did shift my thinking a fair bit.

 

[yssie]

I marvel at so many things my younger self did. I too have become less obsessive about so many things. I mean, I’m not exactly the Big Lebowski or anything but dabbling in old cuts did shift my thinking a fair bit.

Yes! Historical and organic gems, the emotional gymnastics wherein objective perfection and precision really isn’t the goal… Modern brilliant diamonds are so much easier that way