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My diamond has better proportions than me - a thread for imperfect women comfortable in their own sk

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whitby_2773

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i''ve been reading the healthy lifestyle threads and am aware how very little i have in common with some of those tiny, gorgeous women.

so, since i''m on vacation and have come down with a cold, sinus infection, etcetc and have too much time on my hands, i thought i''d out myself on the topic of weight and fitness.

i am not a tiny little thing - oh nooo! not even close! i''m 5''5", large frame, a strong looking build, with the opposite of ''long slender fingers, tiny wrists and ankles, narrow hips'' and so on and so on. the size in which i''m most comfortable is a size 10, and my ideal weight is somewhere between 150 ad 155lbs. yes - you heard me - 5''5" and 155lbs.

up until 2005 i was a gym junkie - 10 hours a week, 2 hours a day, one of free weights and one of aerobics. i was strong and curvy looking and nowhere NEAR a size zero!! i could stomach press 35 kilos more or less interminably, and i used to run places - cause i simply had too much energy to walk! but i wasn''t little, skinny, thin or even slim. definitely not. i looked like this.... (i''m 45 yrs old in these photos, btw)....

whitby and bball.jpg
 

whitby_2773

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good grief! that''s enormous! sorry about that - i just dont know how to shrink these... here''s a full body shot, in the interests of full disclosure...

whitby and bball 2.jpg
 

Skippy123

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Oh I think you might have the healthy lifestyle thread maybe a little wrong; also you are welcome to join us. The more the merrier; it is a big family there and people are there to help each other out. Some people workout and others don't but they work on eating right, etc. I am there to make healthy changes not for perfection, really and I am not skinny either. I do workout and try to eat healthy because diabetes runs in my family and family members have died from it.
I do feel comfortable in my skin; I never wore a size 6 jeans and I know I never will and that is okay by me.
hehe I think you look great in all your pictures; definitely a beautiful woman!!!
 

whitby_2773

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wow - when i said ''full body shot'', i really didnt mean to try to shove my whole body through the screen....

anyhoo....

in 2005 i had some back problems - big ones - which led to me spending a full year on my stomach in bed. there were days when we didn''t know if i''d ever walk normally again, or be able to stand for any appreciable time pain free. consequently, the gym was out as a pastime, and eating was in as the new way to pass the day. consequently, i put on a little weight (20 lbs) and looked like this...(here i am in england - thrilled to be standing!)...

whitby england a.jpg
 

chrono

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I''m no skinny thing either. As one gets older, it harder to maintain the teenager bod.
I think you look great as you are now - there''s rarely a naturally curvy woman who''s skinny.
 

AmberGretchen

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OMG whitby - the title of this thread made me LOL


I think you look wonderful in your pictures - very healthy and fit


I think I''m solidly in the middle on these things - I''m 5''3" and I''ll definitely never be skinny, but I do wear a size 6 (sometimes a 4, occasionally an 8 or even a 2 or a 10 depending on the brand). But because of my height, that definitely isn''t tiny. But I lost almost 50 lbs to get back here, so I think its a pretty good place to be. As long as I''m healthy and feel fit and can be very active, I''m a happy camper - that just happens to go with being around a certain size for me, because when I''m heavier I can''t do all the things I want to do as easily.
 

whitby_2773

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and now i''m 48, 49 in june, with the dreaded 50 next year! and i''m....180lbs. and - what can i tell you? i''m totally comfortable in my skin. i''m a size 12 on a good day, and a 14 when it''s not.

i''ve decided i''d rather be wise than slim, kind than beautiful, and happy most of all. i know it''s possible for some women to have all those characteristics...but my back has declared that those days are over for me. i walk now instead of run, i have aches and pains i never thought i''d ever have, and i''m just not the young energetic thing i used to be.

but i look at the bullets i''ve dodged and i''m just so happy to be here - alive, content, and blessed.

so if you''re an imperfect woman like me who struggles on occasion with the things life brings, but ultimately happy in your skin - this is your thread!

(i dont have a current full body shot of me with me - i''m away from home at the moment - but here''s a close up of my face taken 3-4 weeks ago...)

bnma.jpg
 

whitby_2773

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Date: 4/16/2009 11:16:20 PM
Author: AmberGretchen
OMG whitby - the title of this thread made me LOL



I think you look wonderful in your pictures - very healthy and fit



I think I''m solidly in the middle on these things - I''m 5''3'' and I''ll definitely never be skinny, but I do wear a size 6 (sometimes a 4, occasionally an 8 or even a 2 or a 10 depending on the brand). But because of my height, that definitely isn''t tiny. But I lost almost 50 lbs to get back here, so I think its a pretty good place to be. As long as I''m healthy and feel fit and can be very active, I''m a happy camper - that just happens to go with being around a certain size for me, because when I''m heavier I can''t do all the things I want to do as easily.
AmberGretchen! i''ve been thinking about you and your back. i do hope things unknot and stretch back into place. i read your post and knew exactly how you felt. am sending you a cyber heatpack; get well soon! mwah!
 

LaraOnline

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Whitby, I think you look sexy with a bit more ''curve''... I think it''s true what they say - you can have the body or the face, but not both! I am worried that, although I''m not particularly skinny, I will be haggard in the face as I age...
unfortunately though, I am really short, so there''s no-where for me to put any weight...hello, instant lumpy!!
 

whitby_2773

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Date: 4/16/2009 11:50:21 PM
Author: LaraOnline
Whitby, I think you look sexy with a bit more ''curve''... I think it''s true what they say - you can have the body or the face, but not both! I am worried that, although I''m not particularly skinny, I will be haggard in the face as I age...

unfortunately though, I am really short, so there''s no-where for me to put any weight...hello, instant lumpy!!
"instant lumpy"...ROFL!

hallo real woman


(BIG grin!)
 

ficklefaye

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i hope you feel better, whitby. i really enjoyed reading your posts.

an imperfect woman comfortable in her own skin sounds pretty perfect to me
 

marcy

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Whitby, being comfortable with yourself is so important and so hard to achieve. I think our perception of skinny is all very unique and personal. You look great and I like your philosphy on life. The HLT thread has a wide variety of people at different exercise and dietary levels but all of us are trying to live healthy lives. I hope you join in on the chat sometime. I am thrilled to wear size 10 clothes but I still think I am huge compared to some people. I know I''ll never wear size 6 but I am very content where I am.
 

whitby_2773

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MakingTheGrade, Skippy, Chrono, AmberGretchen, LaraOnline, ficklefaye, marcyc -

thanks for your posts! i love it when women are honest and open about who they are and about their short comings; i think it''s one of the most incusive things we can do as women.

Skippy and marcyc - just to clarify - i dont feel at ALL cut off from the healthy lifestyle threads. 5 years ago it''s perhaps something i would have been really into and i probably still have something small to offer re organic/low inflammation eating/cooking. i think the point for me, tho, is that my life has just simply changed in ways that were outside my control, and i''ve learnt over the last few years to accept that change and be happy with myself...exactly as i am. like most women, i find that a lifelong struggle, so i wanted to set up this thread for women who wanted to stand up and say - "I am not conventionally perfect - YAY!" i thought i''d put it here in hangout because this thread is not so much about exercise and diet as it is about passing the chocolates and popping your favorite dvd in the player!


i''m hoping more women will post pictures or info about the parts of themselves or their lives they find less than perfect, but which they have grown to accept and - dare i say it! - even love over time. there can never be too much self acceptance....
 

strmrdr

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ur cute :}

Do you have a twin sister that lives in IL?
I swear when I saw those pictures I was like wooo that''s _______ that works for one of my ex-clients.

You need to wear a pendant you have a good neck shape for it.
hmmmm a strand of say 8mm pearls with a pink undertone worn lose would rock for you.
 

whitby_2773

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karl! ROFL!

i have one sister, she''s a headmistress at an all girls school, and she is terrifying!

thank you for the pearl suggestion but you are woefully off topic!!

(laughingggg!)

(alternately, if you are secretly a woman who has struggled all her life - or even recently - with what you see as your short comings, feel free to post here!)
 

allycat0303

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I like your post, it''s cute. As for the healthy lifestyle thread, I don''t think the girls think they are tiny or gorgeous. I think with weight, it''s all a matter of personal perception of one''s body. I think my FSIL would look at you and think "Tiny gorgeous woman" she''s morbidly obese though, so it all depends on where you are coming from. But I think we all have our body image issues.
 

April20

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Heck, I think the middle of my body as the same proportions as my diamond. SQUARE. I''m not sure how this happened. I''m trying to get it off and get back in all the cute clothes I own from pre-marriage, pre-30 and pre-whateverweightIam (I have no idea as I refuse to actually get on a scale).
 

Lorelei

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Date: 4/17/2009 6:28:50 AM
Author: allycat0303
I like your post, it's cute. As for the healthy lifestyle thread, I don't think the girls think they are tiny or gorgeous. I think with weight, it's all a matter of personal perception of one's body. I think my FSIL would look at you and think 'Tiny gorgeous woman' she's morbidly obese though, so it all depends on where you are coming from. But I think we all have our body image issues.
Absolutely not!
It is about a group of very ordinary people of various ages ( both men and women) working hard to be healthy and live a healthier lifestyle. We are all at different stages and use different methods, but the common aim is to try to work towards a healthy weight and body, and to make the best of what we have. And I think all of us on the thread would agree the rewards are well worth the effort.
 

Maisie

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Whitby,

The more I read your posts, the more I am drawn to your personality. You are such a fun, sweet and caring person. I am glad you are happy in your own skin, I don''t see any problems with you anyway. You are beautiful both inside and out.

I struggle with my weight. I comfort eat and I know its not helping me out at all. I now have sciatica and its killing me. I can''t walk more than a few minutes without agonising pain in my lower back and leg. I am trying to lose weight but my medication seems to have different ideas. I have gained lots of weight since I started taking anti-depressants. I am not ready to come off them yet but comfort eating can be controlled. I have made a deal with my husband. If he can give up smoking I will give up the rubbish I stick in my mouth every day.

We are in day two. Ask me how I am doing in a month
 

beau13

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Date: 4/16/2009 11:50:21 PM
Author: LaraOnline
Whitby, I think you look sexy with a bit more ''curve''... am worried that, although I''m not particularly skinny, I will be haggard in the face as I age...
unfortunately though, I am really short, so there''s no-where for me to put any weight...hello, instant lumpy!!I think it''s true what they say - you can have the body or the face, but not both! I
I have to disagree with you there!!
I know plenty of women with BOTH!!

Whitby, you look great!!
 

atroop711

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OMG WHITBY...I LOVE YOU More and more every day!

I'm 5ft 4 and also large framed. All of my life I had the shoulders of a LINE BACKER! I always told my dad I was meant to be his son
with how large framed I am. I LOVE myself at 150lbs. Others see that number and think WHAT?? I think...damn I look GOOD! LOL. 150lbs for me is thin...I usually go btwn 150-160lbs....preKIDS. SO funny..whenever I tell ppl how much I weigh they always think I look less..I guess that's because I carry it equally everywhere...especially my big J-LO BUTT (what can I say....It's a Puerto Rican thing


Since having my 3rd child 5 mo ago I have LOTS of weight to lose. I only gained 28lbs this time (other times I gained 40lbs) but I still had weight on from previous pregnancies


I'm starting back on weight watchers and the gym. I used to go only 3 times per week. It's hard with my chronic back condition so I know I will NEVER be skinny (nor do I want)..I like myself with meat on me. [;-) so does my hunky husband


ANYWAY...I think you look beautiful as you are!

BTW are you a GEMINI??? if you are...we need to meet LOL..so am I! (we should meet up for lunch sometime in the city)

I know what you mean about age..I will be 41 this May and my body is doing all sorts of tricks on me


 

whitby_2773

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thanks for responding ladies :) kinda feel a bit odd cause everyone is commenting on MY body!! (eeeek!) can y''all cut that out please and talk about youuuuuuu?!

(fans face, blush recedes, smooths hair, refocuses)

allycat0303 - i totally agree with you that it''s a perspective thing. the ''tiny gorgeous'' comment was a compliment to some of the women i read about and their accomplishments, and by way of intro to my own position, which is about moving rather in the OTHER direction! (i am totally open, however to meeting anyone who would refer to me as a tiny gorgeous woman, so please give your FSIL my best wishes!!)

April20 - the square middle comment cracked me up! i sometimes look at how closely my legs now resemble elongated pyramids and think..."was i even HERE when this happened??"

Lorelei - i know you do a great job in the healthy lifestyle threads - keep up the good work! i''m sure lots of the women there are encouraged and motivated because of the effort you make. :)

Maisie - good luck, dear, on the weight loss/stopping smoking deal with your husband. i wish you nothing but the best on this and i know how hard it can be. can you pop in here from time to time and let us know how you''re doing? my back probs have left me with some nerve damage and ongoing sciatica/cramping issues, and i have to ''work'' to walk any distance. i do it with a lot of teeth gritting and determination, but it hurts. however - my experience is that the more i do it, the more it loosens up the muscles and it does get a little easier. i wont be doing any marathons any time soon, but at least i can move, and that''s better than we thought it might be for a while in there. and tell me about your diet! i find when i make diet changes, it always helps me focus to discuss it. and pls check your WHO''S WHO thread - i''ve left you a message there, and will leave you more as you go on your weight loss odyssey. prayers going your way...

beau13 - i read your post and thought MWAH! just - mwah... :)

atroop - i absolutely LOL''d when i read your post! i play a lot of bridge - both online and IRL, and when i lived in england i came to america to visit a number of friends and scope out real estate before we moved here, and i met my online bridge partner. hilarious, generous, entertaining man...with not a tactful bone in his body. we were chatting at lunch and he said - out of NOWHERE, i might add! - "you''ve got ams like...like...(at this point he realised he was in deep with no escape)...a swimmer.." polite cough, uncomfortable silence... (laughingggggggg) so i LOVED the linebacker comment! with your back issues i think you are my HERO for even contemplating the gym! you go girl!! and yes - a gemini :D i suspect we are built along similar lines, physically, in that we both sound as tho our natural shape is ''strapping''. we can agree we''re never going to be carrie bradshaws if you like, and make a stand as women who look like they may have played male professional sports in a former life!! and i have a gorgeous husband too; sometimes i see him walk into a room from a distance, and i realize i''m grinning like an idiot. after 25 years....

ladies, have a GREAT day and a wonderful run up to the weekend. may you all have a healthy balance of love, exercise and chocolate cake!
 

atroop711

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Date: 4/17/2009 11:13:26 AM
Author: whitby_2773
thanks for responding ladies :) kinda feel a bit odd cause everyone is commenting on MY body!! (eeeek!) can y'all cut that out please and talk about youuuuuuu?!


(fans face, blush recedes, smooths hair, refocuses)


allycat0303 - i totally agree with you that it's a perspective thing. the 'tiny gorgeous' comment was a compliment to some of the women i read about and their accomplishments, and by way of intro to my own position, which is about moving rather in the OTHER direction! (i am totally open, however to meeting anyone who would refer to me as a tiny gorgeous woman, so please give your FSIL my best wishes!!)


April20 - the square middle comment cracked me up! i sometimes look at how closely my legs now resemble elongated pyramids and think...'was i even HERE when this happened??'


Lorelei - i know you do a great job in the healthy lifestyle threads - keep up the good work! i'm sure lots of the women there are encouraged and motivated because of the effort you make. :)


Maisie - good luck, dear, on the weight loss/stopping smoking deal with your husband. i wish you nothing but the best on this and i know how hard it can be. can you pop in here from time to time and let us know how you're doing? my back probs have left me with some nerve damage and ongoing sciatica/cramping issues, and i have to 'work' to walk any distance. i do it with a lot of teeth gritting and determination, but it hurts. however - my experience is that the more i do it, the more it loosens up the muscles and it does get a little easier. i wont be doing any marathons any time soon, but at least i can move, and that's better than we thought it might be for a while in there. and tell me about your diet! i find when i make diet changes, it always helps me focus to discuss it. and pls check your WHO'S WHO thread - i've left you a message there, and will leave you more as you go on your weight loss odyssey. prayers going your way...


beau13 - i read your post and thought MWAH! just - mwah... :)


atroop - i absolutely LOL'd when i read your post! i play a lot of bridge - both online and IRL, and when i lived in england i came to america to visit a number of friends and scope out real estate before we moved here, and i met my online bridge partner. hilarious, generous, entertaining man...with not a tactful bone in his body. we were chatting at lunch and he said - out of NOWHERE, i might add! - 'you've got ams like...like...(at this point he realised he was in deep with no escape)...a swimmer..' polite cough, uncomfortable silence... (laughingggggggg) so i LOVED the linebacker comment! with your back issues i think you are my HERO for even contemplating the gym! you go girl!! and yes - a gemini :D i suspect we are built along similar lines, physically, in that we both sound as tho our natural shape is 'strapping'. we can agree we're never going to be carrie bradshaws if you like, and make a stand as women who look like they may have played male professional sports in a former life!! and i have a gorgeous husband too; sometimes i see him walk into a room from a distance, and i realize i'm grinning like an idiot. after 25 years....


ladies, have a GREAT day and a wonderful run up to the weekend. may you all have a healthy balance of love, exercise and chocolate cake!
it's a great thing that he still makes your heart pitter patter after 25 yrs..that's a good thing!!! I still get that smile on my face when my husband shows up somewhere to meet me. It's been 17yrs and it's nice to feel this way

BTW I answered your question about what happened to my back in the other post

oh another thing...HELLO FELLOW GEMINI! How many personalities do you have? LOL My sister says I have 68...she's jealous. LOL
 

vespergirl

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I think you look great, and to my eyes, you are a thin woman.
 

Italiahaircolor

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Messages
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You know what I think makes a womans body perfect? Confidence. Corny as it may sounds...it makes a huge difference.

I don''t care what size a womans is or what she tips the scale at...if she carries herself well, feels good inside her skin, dresses appropriately for her body type and is well groomed...she instantly becomes beautiful regardless of the numbers!

Personally Whitby, I think you''re lovely. You have a very friendly face which is inviting and warm, you can simply tell you''re a postive person. It''s very brave to come out with your "facts and figures" and speak openly about the changes you wish you could make...but sincerely, I think you''re perfect!
 

Feralpenchant

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Feb 12, 2009
Messages
427
The title of this thread made me laugh!

I am not but 5''3" and 120 lbs.. I''ve always been tiny, so I''m not the best one to comment here..

But WHITBY! How dare you say that you''ve resolved to be more kind than beautiful! I think you look great! Size 0 is overrated anyway. For years I''ve been trying to get some fat to go to my legs, they''re STICKS! I think curvy women are much more beautiful than size 0.

I love how LaraOnline said "You can have the body or the face, but not both!" So true. I have a great body, but I''d trade my face if given the chance.. Well, my nose anyway, LOL.
 

Feralpenchant

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Date: 4/17/2009 3:48:06 AM
Author: whitby_2773
karl! ROFL!


i have one sister, she''s a headmistress at an all girls school, and she is terrifying!


thank you for the pearl suggestion but you are woefully off topic!!


(laughingggg!)


(alternately, if you are secretly a woman who has struggled all her life - or even recently - with what you see as your short comings, feel free to post here!)
I laughed so hard at what Storm posted also, but I didn''t say anything, I wasn''t sure if people would see the humor! HAHA.

When you said your sister is a headmistress at a school and she was terrifying, I immediately thought of Professor McGonagall, from Harry Potter. I''m a dork, I know.
 

AprilBaby

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Whitby, after looking at your pics I think you look better NOW than you did before! You are one sexy momma! I am the dreaded 50 next week and I don''t dread it a bit! I will let you know how it goes! I really can''t wait!
 

whitby_2773

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You women sound earthy and REAL! I love that!

Atroop – I just have the one personality – I just…um…spread it around a lot… :D

Vespergirl – the next time I’m going out and look in the mirror and think ‘oh gees’ – can I borrow your eyes pls??

Italianaircolor – I agree with you – confidence + grooming makes for a gorgeous woman. Any woman. Regardless of stats. There’s nothing sexier than a great big laugh!

Feralpenchant – I suspect that your nose is just fine. I went through my entire teenage years wanting a nose job. I look at my nose now and I think “what for??” And your figure sounds killer! (and I absolutely LOL’d when I read Storm’s post – then wondered how long he’d been drinking…) My sister, who I am in awe of, is like…is like…gees – I don’t know! She’s a one off. She’s the irresistible force and the immovable object all rolled into one. I love her – but I’m pretty sure she’d like to put me on detention!

AprilBaby! 50 next week?! Are you doing anything special? Please let me know! I’m a June baby – birthstone pearl – and my entire plans for next year’s celebration revolve around a great big pair of South Sea babies on the end of diamond drops. Actually, I might just die a happy woman if I could get those! :D

I think our imperfections make us unique. And our uniqueness makes us strong. It’s a secret perhaps only women know….

Have a GREAT weekend ladies!
 
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