maternity leave

[Bella_mezzo]

So...here's my situation...

I've been with my current company for 4 years. My job is ok but has gotten stale, pay is lower than it should be, and I am bored to tears. I am looking for a new position that will be more challenging and pay me what my skill set is worth (about 50-100% more than I am currently being paid...). We're also TTC. We've been TTC for a few months with no success yet, but we're hoping to be pregnant in the next month or two. When we have a child I will need to keep working, at least for 3 more years. I am in New York State and work in the non-profit sector.

My current company offers 12 weeks mat leave: 3 weeks paid leave, and the option to use accrued sick or vacation time to bridge the gap until short term disability kicks in.

I am interviewing for new positions, but if we get pregnant in the next 6 months, will not likely have been in the new position for 12 months before I want to take maternity leave.

We're older than we'd like to be, I'm 31 and DH is 33, and are mildly concerned that we're not pregnant yet after 4 months of unprotected BD and 2 months of carefully timed BD, so we're not looking to postpone our TTC plan.

the company that looks the most interested in me right now, would not be very excited if we got pregnant in the next 3-4 months as the delivery date would correspond with their busiest time of year (it would definitely be possible to make arrangements to make it through this time--it would not cease their operations or anything

) I am also open to working from home part-time during a leave to help alleviate things (though client entertaining is the crux of this crunch time and I would not be up for that immediately after giving brith.)

How would you recommend I approach the topic of maternity leave if an offer is made:

1. say that although we're not planning to start a family for quite some time, I want to be sure that all of my benefits are comparable so there will need to be a clause in the final offer stating that a 12 week unpaid maternity leave is part of my benefits package starting immediately, and that sick and vacation time can be used to bridge the gap until STD is applicable.

2. depend on the 6 week unpaid leave that is mandatory in NYS (I really want to take a 12 week leave, and think it will still be very very hard for me to go back to work then, 6 weeks is unimaginable to me, but I might have to make that work...)

3. don't worry, just deal with it if we do get pregnant in the next few months.

4. just stay bored and underpaid in my current job on the off chance that we get pregnant soon.

any thoughts are most welcome.

DH just started a new job, if he gets a raise before the end of the year (which might be possible) I would have a lot more flexibility regarding my work situation.

 

[Shoopy]

3

I don''t really have much to add to my opinion. I just feel that if you really think this new job will mean more opportunities, better pay, better benefits, and keep that mind fresh (

) then go for it. You really don''t know if you''ll be KU within the next two months or not so I wouldn''t pass up the opportunity.

 

[meresal]

Date: 2/9/2010 1:05:03 PM
Author:Bella_mezzo

How would you recommend I approach the topic of maternity leave if an offer is made:

1. say that although we're not planning to start a family for quite some time, I want to be sure that all of my benefits are comparable so there will need to be a clause in the final offer stating that a 12 week unpaid maternity leave is part of my benefits package starting immediately, and that sick and vacation time can be used to bridge the gap until STD is applicable.

2. depend on the 6 week unpaid leave that is mandatory in NYS (I really want to take a 12 week leave, and think it will still be very very hard for me to go back to work then, 6 weeks is unimaginable to me, but I might have to make that work...)

3. don't worry, just deal with it if we do get pregnant in the next few months.

4. just stay bored and underpaid in my current job on the off chance that we get pregnant soon.

any thoughts are most welcome.

DH just started a new job, if he gets a raise before the end of the year (which might be possible) I would have a lot more flexibility regarding my work situation.

If your DH just got a new job, and you were to get a new job, are you all going to be eligible for Insurance? That seems like a bigger issue than maternity leave to me... most places don't let you sign up for at least 12 months, right?

Are you corporate? I didn't think that companies were flexible with contracts unless you are a pretty high up employee? My sister who is the CCO of a major company just found out that her company has absolutely NO maternity leave policy, and they are not flexible with that, no matter where you are on the ladder. You only have your vacation time to use.

If it were my situation, I would stay where I know that I have a comfortable position and steady insurance (#4).

IMO, I would not use #1. Technically you ARE trying to "start a family", so that could be considered a lie. If I heard a potential employee use the phrase "we are not planning on starting a family for quite some time", I would assume they are talking at least a YEAR away from even getting pregnant.

 

[Bella_mezzo]

Thanks fiery!!! that's what I am thinking. I know I'll be really upset if we put off TTC and the job doesn't work out, or if we put off TTC and the job does work out, but then it takes us a long time to get pregnant. i realized, that this will be an issue with any new job so I wanted to figure out the best way to handle this.

If this job works out it will help me move forward in my career, be more interesting and challenging, and I think it will pay substantially more which would let us put our hypothetical baby in a daycare within walking distance from my office so I could go and nurse the baby once or twice a day which I think would really help me be able to handle going back to work after a baby is born...

Hi Meresal, we'll have insurance for sure. It starts the date of hire so we're covered there.

Any other thoughts are most welcome

 

[iheartscience]

Another vote for 3, although if you do get offered the job I would still ask what all the benefits are, including maternity benefits. That''s a pretty standard thing to find out and I don''t think you need to justify or make excuses for wanting to know. Good luck with the job!

 

[janinegirly]

I'd go for 3 or 4 depending on specifics of your situation.

3) works best if you are driven and want a new job and the potential offer is something you do truly want. Pregnancy shouldn't stop your goals, particulary if it hasn't happened yet. This is assuming you are planning on returning to work after maternity leave and maintaining a career. Like a previous poster said, after an offer has been made you can discuss benefits (which includes policies on leave). I would not start asking for clauses and making contingencies--that's a bit unnecessary and will start things on a bad foot. If no packet is available ask to speak to someone in Benefits and ask them directly. This will influence your decision whether or not to accept the offer much like the other key elements (income, etc.).

4) on the other hand if you are just bored (vs. miserable) and your priority right now is to get pregnant asap (on a side note your ages are not old at all...really you talk like youre 38 and 40!), then it's not the worst thing in the world to stay put in a position you are comfy with and know the benefits. This is not only about maternity leave, it's about coming back after maternity leave. In my case at least, I appreciated being able to transition back to work in a place I knew well and knew what was expected of me. Plus it's easier to negotiate with an employer for various things (doc visits time off, work from home scenarios,etc) when you have built up some credibility with vs. as a new hire. So bottom line boredom and stability might be a good thing if pregnancy is around the corner. On the other hand it might not be around the corner and you can't put your life on hold. The other factor is happiness...if you are miserable and hate your job--well then 3) looks like a better long term solution.

 

[Lauren8211]

Date: 2/9/2010 1:22:22 PM
Author: meresal

Date: 2/9/2010 1:05:03 PM
Author:Bella_mezzo

How would you recommend I approach the topic of maternity leave if an offer is made:

1. say that although we''re not planning to start a family for quite some time, I want to be sure that all of my benefits are comparable so there will need to be a clause in the final offer stating that a 12 week unpaid maternity leave is part of my benefits package starting immediately, and that sick and vacation time can be used to bridge the gap until STD is applicable.

2. depend on the 6 week unpaid leave that is mandatory in NYS (I really want to take a 12 week leave, and think it will still be very very hard for me to go back to work then, 6 weeks is unimaginable to me, but I might have to make that work...)

3. don''t worry, just deal with it if we do get pregnant in the next few months.

4. just stay bored and underpaid in my current job on the off chance that we get pregnant soon.

any thoughts are most welcome.

DH just started a new job, if he gets a raise before the end of the year (which might be possible) I would have a lot more flexibility regarding my work situation.

If your DH just got a new job, and you were to get a new job, are you all going to be eligible for Insurance? That seems like a bigger issue than maternity leave to me... most places don''t let you sign up for at least 12 months, right?

Are you corporate? I didn''t think that companies were flexible with contracts unless you are a pretty high up employee? My sister who is the CCO of a major company just found out that her company has absolutely NO maternity leave policy, and they are not flexible with that, no matter where you are on the ladder. You only have your vacation time to use.

If it were my situation, I would stay where I know that I have a comfortable position and steady insurance (#4).

IMO, I would not use #1. Technically you ARE trying to ''start a family'', so that could be considered a lie. If I heard a potential employee use the phrase ''we are not planning on starting a family for quite some time'', I would assume they are talking at least a YEAR away from even getting pregnant.

Really? I''ve always gotten insurance on Day 1, and the most I''ve ever seen someone have to wait is 90 days. Interesting.

 

[iheartscience]

Date: 2/9/2010 2:12:40 PM
Author: elledizzy5

Date: 2/9/2010 1:22:22 PM

Author: meresal

Date: 2/9/2010 1:05:03 PM

Author:Bella_mezzo

How would you recommend I approach the topic of maternity leave if an offer is made:

1. say that although we''re not planning to start a family for quite some time, I want to be sure that all of my benefits are comparable so there will need to be a clause in the final offer stating that a 12 week unpaid maternity leave is part of my benefits package starting immediately, and that sick and vacation time can be used to bridge the gap until STD is applicable.

2. depend on the 6 week unpaid leave that is mandatory in NYS (I really want to take a 12 week leave, and think it will still be very very hard for me to go back to work then, 6 weeks is unimaginable to me, but I might have to make that work...)

3. don''t worry, just deal with it if we do get pregnant in the next few months.

4. just stay bored and underpaid in my current job on the off chance that we get pregnant soon.

any thoughts are most welcome.

DH just started a new job, if he gets a raise before the end of the year (which might be possible) I would have a lot more flexibility regarding my work situation.

If your DH just got a new job, and you were to get a new job, are you all going to be eligible for Insurance? That seems like a bigger issue than maternity leave to me... most places don''t let you sign up for at least 12 months, right?

Are you corporate? I didn''t think that companies were flexible with contracts unless you are a pretty high up employee? My sister who is the CCO of a major company just found out that her company has absolutely NO maternity leave policy, and they are not flexible with that, no matter where you are on the ladder. You only have your vacation time to use.

If it were my situation, I would stay where I know that I have a comfortable position and steady insurance (#4).

IMO, I would not use #1. Technically you ARE trying to ''start a family'', so that could be considered a lie. If I heard a potential employee use the phrase ''we are not planning on starting a family for quite some time'', I would assume they are talking at least a YEAR away from even getting pregnant.

Really? I''ve always gotten insurance on Day 1, and the most I''ve ever seen someone have to wait is 90 days. Interesting.

Same! The typical wait is 90 days from what I''ve heard, but at my last two jobs my insurance has started the same day I started. I''ve actually never heard of having to wait a full year to get insurance.

 

[MustangGal]

I''d also advise #3, talk about benefits in general after you get the offer. I switched jobs while 4 months preggo, so I''ve kinda been there. Just make sure to sign up for the short-term disability insurance. I know NY has state disablility, but the wage cap on it is pretty low, so a lot of companies offer a buy-up type plan.

 

[Bella_mezzo]

thanks Mustang, so are you recommending an AFLAC kind of thing, separate from state?

Janine, I am very driven and am going crazy with being bored at work, plus there are some weird politics at play, but my current job would be easy to juggle after mat leave. the new job would be more work, but more interesting (same function, slightly different industry) and would better position me for a big career move when I finish my MBA in 2-3 years. That''s the career move I am trying to really be sure I am in the best possible place to make and staying in my current job probably won''t get me there...

I thought about trying to leverage an offer to just get more $ at my current job (and still might) but I would need some type of more interesting project as well...I guess as long as I do it in a friendly way and don''t burn bridges, there wouldn''t be anything to lose if I did that...

I''ll be back with updates if/when I have an offer--whether from this current place or elsewhere (I have many resumes floating around cyber space

).

 

[swimmer]

Date: 2/9/2010 1:22:22 PM
Author: meresal

Date: 2/9/2010 1:05:03 PM

Author:Bella_mezzo


How would you recommend I approach the topic of maternity leave if an offer is made:


1. say that although we're not planning to start a family for quite some time, I want to be sure that all of my benefits are comparable so there will need to be a clause in the final offer stating that a 12 week unpaid maternity leave is part of my benefits package starting immediately, and that sick and vacation time can be used to bridge the gap until STD is applicable.


2. depend on the 6 week unpaid leave that is mandatory in NYS (I really want to take a 12 week leave, and think it will still be very very hard for me to go back to work then, 6 weeks is unimaginable to me, but I might have to make that work...)


3. don't worry, just deal with it if we do get pregnant in the next few months.

4. just stay bored and underpaid in my current job on the off chance that we get pregnant soon.


any thoughts are most welcome.


DH just started a new job, if he gets a raise before the end of the year (which might be possible) I would have a lot more flexibility regarding my work situation.

If your DH just got a new job, and you were to get a new job, are you all going to be eligible for Insurance? That seems like a bigger issue than maternity leave to me... most places don't let you sign up for at least 12 months, right?


Are you corporate? I didn't think that companies were flexible with contracts unless you are a pretty high up employee? My sister who is the CCO of a major company just found out that her company has absolutely NO maternity leave policy, and they are not flexible with that, no matter where you are on the ladder. You only have your vacation time to use.


If it were my situation, I would stay where I know that I have a comfortable position and steady insurance (#4).


IMO, I would not use #1. Technically you ARE trying to 'start a family', so that could be considered a lie. If I heard a potential employee use the phrase 'we are not planning on starting a family for quite some time', I would assume they are talking at least a YEAR away from even getting pregnant.

When insurance kicks in is based both upon the company and the state. For ex, in MA, you are insured on day 1, I had never heard of anything other than that before reading horror stories on PS. Different from insurance and maternity leave, FMLA only is an option after you have been on the job for a year and if the company is more than 50 employees. That is a guarantee that your job will be yours after you return from a leave of up to 12 weeks (unpaid). Each state has different rules about maternity leave, and some companies do better by their employees than the state requires, but if you have been at your place of employ at least 12 months, you can claim maternity leave as FMLA. Of course if your child has serious illness and your job is going to not be compassionate, you might want to just take what they offer for Mat, but keep FMLA in your back pocket.

Good luck Bella, TTC can be very very trying! You have many good options, one will reveal itself to you in the fullness of time!

FMLA website

 

[Shoopy]

We started right away with our insurance too. We do group plans and have open enrollment once a year (in November). If you are a new hire or if you recently had a baby, you have up to 30 days to add insurance or you have to wait until open enrollment.

 

[lovinsparkles]

Date: 2/9/2010 1:43:16 PM
Author: thing2of2
Another vote for 3, although if you do get offered the job I would still ask what all the benefits are, including maternity benefits. That''s a pretty standard thing to find out and I don''t think you need to justify or make excuses for wanting to know. Good luck with the job!

+1.

The one intangible thing I might consider about a job switch - if you have a difficult pregnancy or something, maybe it will be easier to be in a job where you have already built up social capital (i.e. they know you''re a good employee) rather than having to be in the position of being sick and yet compelled to "prove yourself" in a new job. I speak from the point of view of having gone through 3 months of serious morning sickness/nausea during my pregnancy -- I do not think I could have excelled at a new job during that time period...but obviously that doesn''t happen to everyone. Good luck!

 

[meresal]

Date: 2/9/2010 2:55:50 PM
Author: swimmer

Date: 2/9/2010 1:22:22 PM
Author: meresal

Date: 2/9/2010 1:05:03 PM

Author:Bella_mezzo


How would you recommend I approach the topic of maternity leave if an offer is made:


1. say that although we're not planning to start a family for quite some time, I want to be sure that all of my benefits are comparable so there will need to be a clause in the final offer stating that a 12 week unpaid maternity leave is part of my benefits package starting immediately, and that sick and vacation time can be used to bridge the gap until STD is applicable.


2. depend on the 6 week unpaid leave that is mandatory in NYS (I really want to take a 12 week leave, and think it will still be very very hard for me to go back to work then, 6 weeks is unimaginable to me, but I might have to make that work...)


3. don't worry, just deal with it if we do get pregnant in the next few months.

4. just stay bored and underpaid in my current job on the off chance that we get pregnant soon.


any thoughts are most welcome.


DH just started a new job, if he gets a raise before the end of the year (which might be possible) I would have a lot more flexibility regarding my work situation.

If your DH just got a new job, and you were to get a new job, are you all going to be eligible for Insurance? That seems like a bigger issue than maternity leave to me... most places don't let you sign up for at least 12 months, right?


Are you corporate? I didn't think that companies were flexible with contracts unless you are a pretty high up employee? My sister who is the CCO of a major company just found out that her company has absolutely NO maternity leave policy, and they are not flexible with that, no matter where you are on the ladder. You only have your vacation time to use.


If it were my situation, I would stay where I know that I have a comfortable position and steady insurance (#4).


IMO, I would not use #1. Technically you ARE trying to 'start a family', so that could be considered a lie. If I heard a potential employee use the phrase 'we are not planning on starting a family for quite some time', I would assume they are talking at least a YEAR away from even getting pregnant.

When insurance kicks in is based both upon the company and the state. For ex, in MA, you are insured on day 1, I had never heard of anything other than that before reading horror stories on PS. Different from insurance and maternity leave, FMLA only is an option after you have been on the job for a year and if the company is more than 50 employees. That is a guarantee that your job will be yours after you return from a leave of up to 12 weeks (unpaid). Each state has different rules about maternity leave, and some companies do better by their employees than the state requires, but if you have been at your place of employ at least 12 months, you can claim maternity leave as FMLA. Of course if your child has serious illness and your job is going to not be compassionate, you might want to just take what they offer for Mat, but keep FMLA in your back pocket.

Good luck Bella, TTC can be very very trying! You have many good options, one will reveal itself to you in the fullness of time!



This topic is so interesting to me

I think I was confusing "Insurance" with "Benefits".

I know at my company and a few others you do have to be employed for at least a year in order to receieve benefits, like what Swimmer explained about FMLA. Our "Child Care" leave benefits, which is 12 weeks paid and 8 weeks unpaid, don't kick in unless you have been an employee for at least 12 months.

My apologies.

 

[janinegirly]

Date: 2/9/2010 2:50:19 PM
Author: Bella_mezzo
thanks Mustang, so are you recommending an AFLAC kind of thing, separate from state?

Janine, I am very driven and am going crazy with being bored at work, plus there are some weird politics at play, but my current job would be easy to juggle after mat leave. the new job would be more work, but more interesting (same function, slightly different industry) and would better position me for a big career move when I finish my MBA in 2-3 years. That''s the career move I am trying to really be sure I am in the best possible place to make and staying in my current job probably won''t get me there...

I thought about trying to leverage an offer to just get more $ at my current job (and still might) but I would need some type of more interesting project as well...I guess as long as I do it in a friendly way and don''t burn bridges, there wouldn''t be anything to lose if I did that...

I''ll be back with updates if/when I have an offer--whether from this current place or elsewhere (I have many resumes floating around cyber space

).

Based on the extra information I say go for the new job! After the offer is received, look into the benefits. They may very well be on par with your current firm.

As for benefit eligiblity, I always thought 90 days was the standard but at my own firm it was instant.

 

[Bella_mezzo]

yes, that''s why I''m asking this b/c I wouldn''t be eligible for leave under FMLA if we got pregnant in the first few months at a new job, I would need to negotiate something with them as part of my hiring package if 12 weeks of mat leave was important to me.

So, I am just going to keep up with my pursuit of a new job, see what happens with this place, or elsewhere, and cross that bridge when I come to it. I''ll be sure to slip maternity leave into the benefits coversation (as one of many) in a conversation after I get an offer.

pregnancy would be "easy" at my current job b/c i have built-up a ton of capital, but I really don''t think I am willing to stick it out here for 10 months of pregnancy, 3 months of mat leave, and then some time after, especially since my salary is not high enough to cover childcare in this neighborhood.

I realized that if I need to work after a baby is born (which I do) that for at least the first year I want the baby to be near me in childcare, not clear up in my neighborhood which is a 35 minute subway ride, or a 15 minute or more $20 cab ride away. Also, I ideally want to work from home 1-2 days per week (which is probably possible in my current job, and a good possibility for this potential job).

 

[waterlilly]

I would def. keep in mind that once the little bundle comes - your interest in finding a more "challenging" job might be far far out of your mind.
Is your current position flexible? Can you come and go as you please, come in late/leave early with no big hassles?

Having a flexible, steady job with a good ML package sounds like a great deal if your priority is starting a family.

Would absolutely find out exactly what the benefits package is during the interview process.

Option #1 sounds like a fairytale option unless you are a highly skilled specialist and they are dying to have you!

 

[MustangGal]

On the disability, it looks like NY has a cap of $170 per week for benefits, which seem really low.

You might be a bit safer not exactly *trying*, but not not trying, so that you would run into FMLA eligibility. If your career is this important to you, 3 months more of not being pregnant isn''t such a big deal if it''ll make things better in the long run. (we waited 3 month longer than originally planned for TTC so I could hit open enrollment to add disability insurance)

 

[Shoopy]

Date: 2/9/2010 3:46:06 PM
Author: waterlilly
I would def. keep in mind that once the little bundle comes - your interest in finding a more ''challenging'' job might be far far out of your mind.

I don''t necessarily agree with that. I have my DD and am searching every day for a more challenging job since this one is starting to get too boring.

 

[hisdiamondgirl]

Date: 2/9/2010 1:22:22 PM
Author: meresal

Date: 2/9/2010 1:05:03 PM
Author:Bella_mezzo

How would you recommend I approach the topic of maternity leave if an offer is made:

1. say that although we're not planning to start a family for quite some time, I want to be sure that all of my benefits are comparable so there will need to be a clause in the final offer stating that a 12 week unpaid maternity leave is part of my benefits package starting immediately, and that sick and vacation time can be used to bridge the gap until STD is applicable.

2. depend on the 6 week unpaid leave that is mandatory in NYS (I really want to take a 12 week leave, and think it will still be very very hard for me to go back to work then, 6 weeks is unimaginable to me, but I might have to make that work...)

3. don't worry, just deal with it if we do get pregnant in the next few months.

4. just stay bored and underpaid in my current job on the off chance that we get pregnant soon.

any thoughts are most welcome.

DH just started a new job, if he gets a raise before the end of the year (which might be possible) I would have a lot more flexibility regarding my work situation.

If your DH just got a new job, and you were to get a new job, are you all going to be eligible for Insurance? That seems like a bigger issue than maternity leave to me... most places don't let you sign up for at least 12 months, right?

Are you corporate? I didn't think that companies were flexible with contracts unless you are a pretty high up employee? My sister who is the CCO of a major company just found out that her company has absolutely NO maternity leave policy, and they are not flexible with that, no matter where you are on the ladder. You only have your vacation time to use.

If it were my situation, I would stay where I know that I have a comfortable position and steady insurance (#4).

IMO, I would not use #1. Technically you ARE trying to 'start a family', so that could be considered a lie. If I heard a potential employee use the phrase 'we are not planning on starting a family for quite some time', I would assume they are talking at least a YEAR away from even getting pregnant.

Wow, I've never heard of having to wait a year for insurance to kick in.

ETA: Ahhh, got it. I was late to the party

. I never did answer the question. In your position, I would probably go with 3.

 

[janinegirly]

Date: 2/9/2010 4:03:51 PM
Author: fiery

Date: 2/9/2010 3:46:06 PM
Author: waterlilly
I would def. keep in mind that once the little bundle comes - your interest in finding a more ''challenging'' job might be far far out of your mind.

I don''t necessarily agree with that. I have my DD and am searching every day for a more challenging job since this one is starting to get too boring.

I don''t necessarily agree with that either--although it''s a possibility. Still the fact that she is not pregnant yet rmakes me encourage her to keep pursing goals. You can''t have life stop when you TTC, it''s just too much pressure!

Another thing to keep in mind is that negotiating work from home is not a slam dunk unless your employer has an established policy. Even so it''s easier to work this in once you have "capital" as you put it vs. being the new girl just back from ML. Just my 2cents, and I speak from some experience here (negotiating a day working from home as an established employee in my case).

 

[waterlilly]

Date: 2/9/2010 4:03:51 PM
Author: fiery

Date: 2/9/2010 3:46:06 PM

Author: waterlilly

I would def. keep in mind that once the little bundle comes - your interest in finding a more ''challenging'' job might be far far out of your mind.

I don''t necessarily agree with that. I have my DD and am searching every day for a more challenging job since this one is starting to get too boring.

I meant in a more immediate sense after ML is over - dealing with sleep deprivation and a more demanding job don''t sound fun to me.

But - even still, that is a bit off in the distance. Sounds like the job might be happening rather soon, so you''d be somewhat established by the time the baby arrived.

 

[Puppmom]

Bella, I vote 3 - don''t worry about it! Just TTC as planned. Most places you won''t be eligible for any paid leave for a year (at least in my experience) but that''s my my FIL likes to call a "Class A Problem" - wouldn''t you love for THAT to be what you were fretting about in a few months?

Oh - and quit worrying about the fact that you''ve been TTC for a few months with no success. DH and I had 5 months of *perfectly* timed BD before we got our BFP. We''re 31 and 33 - it''s perfectly normal. It''s easy for me to say now. At the time, it felt like it was taking FOREVER!

 

[ChinaCat]

I only skimmed but while I agree for the most part with the comments, just wanted to say that I switched jobs while I was 6 months pregnant and technically I wasn''t eligible for their maternity leave. I did make it part of my offer and made it clear that I couldn''t consider the job unless I got the maternity leave. It wasn''t a problem.

Just to keep in mind if you do find yourself pregnant and interviewing, it can''t hurt to ask for the mat leave even if technically you may not be eligible for it. Everything is possible during negotiations.

Good luck TTC!

 

[Mara]

i say go with #3 for now or #4 if mat benefits are really important to you.

i also agree that a huge challenge in a career MAY not be as important after the baby comes. i think you don't know for sure til you are in the situation. i definitely know people who can't wait to return to work and want it to be more challenging than ever to not get bored and also to make it 'worthwhile' leaving their baby etc, but i also know other parents who are just happy to go back to a job they know and can make work and is not too demanding while they are making the transition to working parent.

re : being challenged. 10 months is a long time...if you do get a new job now then by the time you go out on mat leave, it may not be as challenging anymore and when you come back it might be the 'perfect' blend of still exciting and yet familiar.

consider also, what if it takes 2-3 months to get hired? that is not unheard of where i am...sometimes interview rounds and decisions can take months. think about that, but also if you DO get hired right away... and it takes a few more months to get preggo, then add your 10 months of gestation, you might be right up on that 12 month mark to actually get mat benefits.

oh and one more note... sometimes companies supplement your maternity benefits. my company matches my pay to 100% for the first 8 weeks i am out. so on top of state disability they bring me to 100% themselves. not all companies have policies but if it's important, def consider that and ask about it beforehand as it can make a diff.

good luck!

 

[cara]

Just to throw this out there as fairly miserable newly pregnant person, I apparently need to consider the first trimester not a good time for me to be taking on new things like starting a new job. That would be really really difficult right now, I am having a hard time going through the motions at a job I've been at for a while and that has some flexibility. Obviously each person is different, but if you haven't been pregnant you don't know how its going to go for you.

*I* would probably advise you hold off on the TTC a few months (or maybe not avoid but not try) if you switch jobs right away to be able to get a little more mat. leave under FMLA and at least get a month or two into your new job before potentially hurling into trash cans and wondering around with a zombie-like face of ill-pallor, if you are so blessed with such symptoms. Its one thing to negotiate terms of maternity leave with your new company if you are actually pregnant while being hired, its another to basically inform them you are trying and *may* need mat. leave in less than a year. But I'm not you, and don't have nagging worries about fertility in my head (which it sounds like you do even though you are still in the normal trying timespan!) Also, it sounds like switching jobs is really the right call longer term for you, so it might be good to get that process started rather than putting your life on hold with the TTC. I guess you could make the same argument to keep trying regardless of what you do job-wise, but the amount of delaying is different in the two cases.

 

[NewEnglandLady]

I''m just throwing this option out there, so if it''s stupid, impossible or not at all what you want, just disregard this post

Since your job is not exactly challenging right now and you are being underpaid, is it possible to turn your full-time job into a part-time job after having the baby?

I only ask because a good friend of mine just negotiated this with her employer. She was in a similar position as you--had a job that was not challenging, but was TTC and wasn''t sure if she should find more challenging/better paying job while TTC. They did get pregnant before she found a new job, so she decided to put together a maternity plan for herself. She presented two scenarios to her boss: 1. That she get a raise and a promotion which would take effect when she returned from maternity leave and would include her working from home at least one day a week. Working from home + the raise would help cover the costs of a nanny or 2. Keep her current position and pay, but only work 3 days per week. Two from home and one in the office. So she took her non-challenging job and used it to her benefit by reducing her hours. They ended up going for option #2 and now she only needs to hire a part-time nanny.

Anyway, I''m just wondering if negotiating something like this might be an option for you so that you don''t lose all of your benefits and you can find a solution that would work for you?

 

[gailrmv]

Havent read all the replies, but my opinion is to carry on with your life, both the job search and ttc. Whichever happens first (new job or new pregnancy), you can adjust the other accordingly if you need to.

In my situation, I started looking for a new job and ttc at the same time (similar situation, had been at my same job several years and needed a new challenge). I got preggo before i found a new job, so i opted to stay on the old job since it was familiar and flexible and i had already proven myself, as others had mentioned. This worked out well, as I was able to sort of take it easy during pregnancy. I went back to work part time from home after mat leave, finished our major initiative, and am now taking some time out of work to be a SAHM before figuring out my next work challenge!

in my opinion, if you are SURE you'll be back to work after mat leave, no problem with starting a new job while ttc or pregnant. i would have a problem ethically starting a new job, being on it just a few months, taking mat leave, then quitting. but it doesn;t sound like that is your plan.

no matter what, i would not mention mat leave during my application process unless i was already pregnant. definitely not mention it during the interview regardless except maybe if you were obviously showing, and wanted to emphasize that you WILL be back to work after mat leave.

in my experience, at least in my field, paid mat leave is the exception not the rule. Most people I know were able to use sick and vaca leave to get paid while out on mat leave, but otherwise were on their own. We have no state laws where i live about maternity leave, so it's just FMLA. I would plan on that 12 weeks being unpaid, and if it is paid at all, consider it a pleasant surprise!

I could rant all day about why I think mat leave in the US is just too short, but that is a whole other topic!

 

[vespergirl]

I worked at a law firm with a great maternity leave policy, but the policy was that you were not eligible for paid maternity leave unless you had been a full-time employee for one year. So, even if your insurance kicks in immediately (as mine did) you may not be eligible for any maternity benefits unless you''ve been at the company for a certain length of time ...

 

[Bella_mezzo]

thanks again for the insight ladies!

I am going to see what they offer, keep sending out my resume, and figure things out if I get an offer.

I will give my current employer the chance to counter b/c if they''d give me a raise, add a half a position with the responsibilities that I want to mine ( it might be worth it to stay), and we''ll keep TTC. If I could shift my job to pt time for the same salary that''d be great, but I don''t think that''s going to happen and it certainly wouldn''t happen until after I had a kid, and another year plus of this is going to suck my soul right out of me

If I get an offer from this place, it would likely be in mid-march. Which would be on or right before I would get a BFP if we get pregnant this month so there''s not much I can do there. I''ll just have to make it work

If I get an offer from somewhere else at 14 weeks or after I would disclose it and make maternity leave part of my package.

Thanks!