Ladies, do you get emotional after a disappointing haircut?

[mia1181]

I''m not even talking about a bad haircut, but maybe one just isn''t what you''d hope it would be.

I''m seriously crying right now over my hair. It''s not a bad cut/color job, just nothing spectacular. I guess I spent that whole time waiting for the color to set and getting shampooed, telling myself I was going to have an amazing cut. I wanted to try something new and different, but I look the same. I wanted an a-line bob, but DH likes my hair longer and asked if I can keep the length. So she was going to do longer version of the bob, but then she noticed I have a lot of face-framing layers around my face that make it hard to pull off the look. So instead I just have my regular boring hair with layers. It''s not like my hair was butchered, but I am disappointed. I feel so outdated.

Anyway I am so ashamed that I crying over this..... I know it''s because I got my hopes up, but it''s still pretty crummy.

 

[mommy2iz]

totally been there + done that. good news - it''s hair, and will grow/change. you could always call your stylist and ask to come back in for a re-vamp.

 

[vintagelover229]

Date: 1/10/2009 7:36:26 PM
Author: mommy2iz
totally been there + done that. good news - it''s hair, and will grow/change. you could always call your stylist and ask to come back in for a re-vamp.

Ditto that! It''s okay to be upset over something that you were expecting more out of! Just don''t let it keep ya down for to long!

Just be happy it didn''t come out BAD...you could be worrying about how butched your hair was instead of how it didn''t turn out as "updated" as you wanted!

HUGS!

 

[swingirl]

Awww. Are you disappointed because the hair dresser didn't give you what you wanted? Or because you have to satisfy your DH and that makes it difficult to try something new?

But to answer your question I look at a bad haircut as something that will grow out and I don't get too upset. I also don't have to keep to any length or color for my DH. Oh, one more thing, I never expect an amazing cut. I only hope to look decent (and maybe get a compliment after a day or so) from my family.

I love pugs!!! I have an 8 year old.

 

[Deelight]

Not usually because hair is just hair to me however the last bad hair cut I got it was that bad I came onto here to vent.

 

[Italiahaircolor]

Go wash your hair and dry it yourself...

Sometimes stylists miss the mark when it comes to doing a "good blowdry"...believe me. I love my stylist and have been seeing her for years, but she never (and I do mean never) blows my hair out to my liking. She usually makes it flatter than I like, or curls the whole thing under and I look in mirror and always find myself wondering "what time does soccer practice get out???".

If you still dislike your hair, call the salon and let them know! Re-cuts are very common practice, and most stylists aren''t offended by them either, so don''t worry about that. The salon wants you to be happy, bottom line. Repeat clients pay their bills, so you being pleased is very important.

Hugs, I know it sucks to feel bottomed out over a hair cut, but explore your options.

 

[mia1181]

Thanks for making me feel normal mommy2iz and redrose. Your right it definitely isn''t the end of the world.

 

[FrekeChild]

Yes! All of the time. Well not all of the time because I don''t get my hair cut that often. What makes it especially disappointing is when she even just misses the mark by a little bit. I''ve been going to my stylist for about 24 years now (she still doesn''t look over 40, btw) and she''s saved my hair more than she''s messed it up, so I give her the benefit of the doubt, and most of the time I''m not very particular about it anyway. Just so long as it will fit in a pony tail, I don''t really care! (But yeah, when I would like to actually style it, it is irritating when I feel like she didn''t do the best job.)

I will be getting a haircut later this month, or maybe in early Feb. I''ll let you guys know if I''m POed....

 

[2Artists]

Ok let me think of bad hair incidents I have had.

There was the super duper short (not the cute indie type just cruddy) bangs that someone gave me as a kid. Yikes.

Junior high crapolla perm. Never did that again-plus my hair later went wavy on its own.

Highlight disaster #1-the person who fixed it was like whoa what the heck did they do to you. I was spotted kinda like a cheetah.

Highlight disaster #2-someone messed up a leetle bit OK a lot. And it was not pretty. Again the person who fixed it had to call over the salon owner and other experts so they could figure out how to best fix it. Lovely. FYI I did not inflict those messed up highlights on myself.

Anyways I got super emotional every single time. I cried, kept my hair in a turban when I was by a mirror, wore a hat you name it. But they were fixable in the end and there are so many talented hair experts who are geniuses at fixing up others work. My hair turned out great in the end. It was a bit of a journey but it worked out.

It feels not good at all to go through though.

Hugs.

Mrs.2Artists

 

[mia1181]

Date: 1/10/2009 7:40:09 PM
Author: swingirl
Awww. Are you disappointed because the hair dresser didn''t give you what you wanted? Or because you have to satisfy your DH and that makes it difficult to try something new?

But to answer your question I look at a bad haircut as something that will grow out and I don''t get too upset. I also don''t have to keep to any length or color for my DH. Oh, one more thing, I never expect an amazing cut. I only hope to look decent (and maybe get a compliment after a day or so) from my family.

I love pugs!!! I have an 8 year old.

Swingirl- All of the above and then some! I guess I am disappointed because the dresser couldn''t give me what I wanted because I have a bunch of layers around my face and you need to have it all one length. Several months ago I was going to get the same hairstyle and a different stylist told me the same thing. I thought it had grown out, but now I think it is actually damaged hair around my face that keeps breaking. So I''m a little upset about that too. DH would never tell me how to wear my hair but I asked his opinion and he gave it to me honestly. He still told me to do what ever I want, but yeah it was in the back of my head. I should never have asked him. I think I am also upset that it cost me $245! I did buy two products, but I feel a little ripped off.

I''m just tired of this whole thing... it''s so stressful!

Oh and our guy is 7! Who doesn''t love a pug?

 

[mia1181]

Date: 1/10/2009 7:42:25 PM
Author: Italiahaircolor
Go wash your hair and dry it yourself...

Sometimes stylists miss the mark when it comes to doing a ''good blowdry''...believe me. I love my stylist and have been seeing her for years, but she never (and I do mean never) blows my hair out to my liking. She usually makes it flatter than I like, or curls the whole thing under and I look in mirror and always find myself wondering ''what time does soccer practice get out???''.

If you still dislike your hair, call the salon and let them know! Re-cuts are very common practice, and most stylists aren''t offended by them either, so don''t worry about that. The salon wants you to be happy, bottom line. Repeat clients pay their bills, so you being pleased is very important.

Hugs, I know it sucks to feel bottomed out over a hair cut, but explore your options.

I did straighten it with the flat iron when I came home. She flipped the ends out which makes me feel so dated. But it''s at length where it will just hit my shoulders and curl up anyway!

It''s really not so much that it''s a bad cut just not something people will notice, ya know?

 

[mia1181]

Freke- hopefully your haircut will be better and you won''t have to vent too! I got my hopes up and I shouldn''t have. Now that I think about it, today was the first time I wasn''t nervous when I was getting it done. Typically, I am nervous the whole time because I don''t want them to ef it up. This time I wasn''t. I must have been over confident...

2Artists!-Your post put a huge

on my face. Thank you! I laughed at your disasters, but I also realised I have had soooooo many real disasters that this is nothing! I once tried an at-home highlighting kit and turned my hair orange. It was a Sunday and all the salons were closed but I found a lady that happened to be in some random salon. Her solution was to add more blonde highlights to it so my head was completely white. Then, I thought I could get a box of brown colored dye and cover it (Italia, your probably laughing if you are reading this!). So then my hair was a weird shade of gray! My scalp hurt from the all treatments, but I put on a hat and on Tuesday went to a nice salon where they fixed it! I don''t think I cried when that happened either, instead I think I was in problem-solving mode (which actually got me into a lot of trouble because I should have just waited for my salon to open!). Anyway thanks for putting it into perspective!

 

[Italiahaircolor]

Date: 1/10/2009 8:01:45 PM
Author: mia1181

Date: 1/10/2009 7:42:25 PM
Author: Italiahaircolor
Go wash your hair and dry it yourself...

Sometimes stylists miss the mark when it comes to doing a ''good blowdry''...believe me. I love my stylist and have been seeing her for years, but she never (and I do mean never) blows my hair out to my liking. She usually makes it flatter than I like, or curls the whole thing under and I look in mirror and always find myself wondering ''what time does soccer practice get out???''.

If you still dislike your hair, call the salon and let them know! Re-cuts are very common practice, and most stylists aren''t offended by them either, so don''t worry about that. The salon wants you to be happy, bottom line. Repeat clients pay their bills, so you being pleased is very important.

Hugs, I know it sucks to feel bottomed out over a hair cut, but explore your options.

I did straighten it with the flat iron when I came home. She flipped the ends out which makes me feel so dated. But it''s at length where it will just hit my shoulders and curl up anyway!

It''s really not so much that it''s a bad cut just not something people will notice, ya know?

Get a re-cut...ask for another inch off...and you''ll feel much better.

 

[DivaDiamond007]

Mia - no real advice, just want to let you know that I know how you feel.

I have some hair horrors of my own:

1. I am very blonde (see my pic in the mommies thread). As a teen I thought it would be cool to dye my hair auburn. BIG mistake. It turned purple. My mother took me to a salon and they stripped it as much as they could and I then ended up with orange hair. Ugh.

2. In September of last year I was getting ready for my son''s baptism and I was in a pinch to get my hair done. My DH''s aunt is a former stylist and regularly cuts hair for his cousins, etc. so I agreed to let her do mine. I took pictures and explained how I wanted it done and she butchered it. It was wayyyyy too short and she didn''t listen to me at all. I cried for days. I made an appointment with my stylist, who I''ve been with since 2005, and she mended it but recommended I let it grow out a bit before touching it again. Too bad my hair grows so slow!

3. Finally, as I said, my hair is now too short. I was comforting a friend of mine at a hospital when her mom was sick and her father insinuated that I am a lesbian because of my short hair! What!!??

Unfortunately, my regular stylist was diagnosed with Stage IV cancer and died just yesterday. It''s really sad because she was only in her 40''s. She''s the only person I''ve ever trusted to cut my hair and now I have to start a new search. I did visit a different salon for a trim and I liked that woman so I may stick with her.

Maybe you can post some pics of your new cut and we can offer some advice? Hope you feel better about it soon!

Love pugs too!

Diva

 

[Bliss]

Mia, I am SO sorry! I understand what that feels like!

On the upside, at least it''s not an awful haircut! I once got bad bangs, and I felt like this for 2 months!

HUGS

 

[Skippy123]

I hate hate hate hate hate getting my haircut! I always feel extremely stressed when I get a haircut; I much rather get my teeth cleaned than a cut. lol
I feel for you and hear you! I am the same way! Now I get more vocal about what I want and don't want especially since it is a bit pricey for my haircut. hugs!

 

[Elmorton]

I have extreme emotions when I get my hair cut - mainly because I don''t do it very often, so when I go, it''s because I''m really ready for a change and I decide to care about my appearance for a change. If it''s good, then my self-absorbed, self-confident, movie-star persona comes out. Bad have two responses - there''s the bad when the stylist talks me into something that I''m not crazy about which results in my response of feeling stupid because I can''t vocalize what I want or stand up for myself, and then there''s the reaction when I''m really excited for something new and then I''m disappointed and I get upset over my disappointment and vanity. Ohhh, and then there''s the awful combination of both. Don''t feel like you''re the only one - I''ve cried over haircuts plenty of times.

 

[Burk]

Oh yea! I cried in the salon after a good cut one time!

Sorry you''re not feeling like your haircut is what you wanted it to be.

 

[LGK]

Lol once I made the mistake of letting my mom talk me into going to her hairstylist. Guess what? I got my mom''s haircut!

Not so hot on a 22 yr old... I totally cried about that one. I always have long hair- to go from mid-back long to a few inches was oh so not good.

(Bliss, you made me scare the cat off my lap, I laughed so hard!)

These days I just cut my own hair. Long n curly hides a multitude of sins!

 

[Miranda]

Date: 1/10/2009 10:21:14 PM
Author: Bliss
Mia, I am SO sorry! I understand what that feels like!

On the upside, at least it''s not an awful haircut! I once got bad bangs, and I felt like this for 2 months!

HUGS

LOL! I am dying, Bliss! I had this same bangs! I was going to hunt for a pic, but, you went ahead and posted the pic for me!!!! I had Lloyd bangs once, too! I never went to see that damn stylist *Jane* again! When she was done she said, "Oh how cute. Baby bangs." I wish I would have said, "Oh F*** you!" But instead, I smiled and said, "Thank you." And gave her a tip!

I''m sorry you are unhappy mia. I think you''ll like your hair better tommorow! Like Italia said, sometimes it is better when you do it yourself.

 

[strmrdr]

My sis is a beautician and it is very common.
Been in there many times when someone comes in crying because they wanted a new hair style then hated it.
Biggest problem is you can never tell how it is going to look until you try it.
One lady it happens 3 or 4 times a year she always wants to try new things then hates it.

 

[mia1181]

Okay well my hair isn''t that bad, but I am unhappy. I can''t go in for a recut because it''s not her fault, it''s not my fault. It just is what it is. I think she wants to try and give me the cut I want next month and I am going to have to wait for the damaged pieces around my face to grow out. She did cut the back shorter so I have a slight A-line thing going on. But in general it looks the same. Another thing I am upset about is that I cost myself $ by telling her how much I paid at another salon for highlights. She charged me that price! It''s usually like $80 and she charged me $120. It was my own fault I didn''t realize the stylist determines the price.

I am just so tired of the whole process. Trying to explain what I want and hope they get it. Then paying so much and the tip. Trying to get out of buying products without looking cheap. All of this is enough to deal with whether or not I even like the end result.

Bliss!- Oh how much fun was it to scroll down to that pic! In fact I kept scrolling back up for another laugh! I usually give myself those bangs whenever I try to cut them myself! Anyway thanks for a great laugh!

Skippy- I try to be vocal, but part of my problem is that I want their opinion. I''m so clueless on what looks good on me that I think I try too hard to get their opinion. Unfortunately, my face just doesn''t lend itself to any particular style. The only thing I know is that I need bangs because I have a high hairline other than that I am clueless.

Elmorton- That''s exactly how I am. I don''t go to get my hair done on a regular basis mostly because it is so expensive. I just get my roots done regularly and then I get cuts when I am in a mood for a change. Your so right about how awesome I feel when I get a good cut. I strut myself home and then tell DH he has to take me out! Glad I''m not the only one!

Burk- Thankfully I made it home before crying (not even in the car!) I was thinking of doing it while she was pitching products to me! Well at least it was because yours was a good cut, I think that probably made the stylist happy!

LittleGreyKitten- Similarly, I once went to MIL''s hair stylist and got too close to the same color! No thanks I don''t want to be twinzies with MIL!

Storm- My problem is that I don''t speak up I smile and say I love it and the get a good tip either way. I wish I could be more honest.

 

[EricaR]

When I first moved to Southern California I had an extremely hard time finding someone who could cut my hair. I have very thick, curly hair but the individual strands are fine (most curly hair is coarse). I would schedule my haircuts for Friday evenings so that if the cut came out badly (and it often did) I had enough time to drive up to the Bay Area to get it fixed. Nothing like driving 400 miles for your hair!!!

 

[JSM]

I totally understand! I know it''s irrational, but so much of my identity and who I am is tied to my hair. I''ve been seeing the same person for years and schedule my appointments so they are whenever I visit my parents - hundreds of miles away. I overpay for piece of mind.

I once had a horrible job done and cried for days! Since I''ve never cut off more than an inch off at a time!

 

[neatfreak]

I've cried many many times over bad cuts hon, my hair is super duper thick and hard to cut right, so I've been there.

Now that I have a stylist that I LOVE, we always talk about bad/not what the client wants haircuts and he gave me his opinion on why cuts often don't work out and how you can help your stylist and I thought it was really great advice.

1. Don't go in with a picture of "kind of" what you want. Like don't go in with a picture and say "I want this cut but longer" because as he says it then isn't the same cut and thus may not work right. Try to find a picture of the exact cut you want or describe it using words to your stylist.

2. DON'T use hairstyling lingo unless you really know what it means. He says people often come in asking for certain things, he would do them, and then people say "That's not what I meant!". So only use the lingo if you really know what it means.

3. Don't trust a stylist that never says no. A good stylist should be able and willing to tell you when a cut you want won't work on your hair/face shape/current haircut and offer alternatives. They shouldn't go ahead with a cut that won't work because you'll be unhappy afterwards.

And please don't worry about looking cheap! If you don't need/want the products don't buy em! Just say no.

You are in San Francisco right? If it helps I really love Irina at Cinta salon (it's right outside Union Square). She's cut my hair a few times when I've been in the area and did my wedding hair too. Super nice and IMO very honest about what will/won't work with certain hair types.

 

[anchor31]

Oh yes. I had a bad hair cut by a cheap hair stylist in the fall last year and I cried so hard! It was ten months before the wedding so I didn''t really have a reason to freak out, but I did. I love my hair, and she totally butchered it. No more cheap haircuts, I''ve learned my lesson. Fortunately, it grew back and I was able to get it recut into something decent.

 

[gemgirl]

Oh mia, I''ve had such disasterous haircuts, that I''ve had to wear a pony tail for four months waiting for it grow out a little so I could get it cut again. My hair is fine and very wavy and frizzy if I don''t blow it dry and use straightening balms. It looks best when it''s all one length, but I went for the stacked haircut that everyone''s had for years. My last stacked cut was two and half years ago when my haircutter must have lost track of what she was doing or whose hair she was cutting. She cut my hair wayyyyy too short, and she cut the right side much shorter than the left and with many more layers. It took me more than two years for that haircut to grow out. Now for the first time in a very long time, I don''t think I have any layers left. Maybe a stray short wisp here and there but now I keep it longish and all one length. No more angles, layers, stacking etc for me. Yes, I look like I did in my high school graduation picture but at least my hair looks healthy. I have a little of the A-line thing going on but still a blunt cut.

For the first time in two and half years, my hair looks healthy. I don''t care about styles and trends any more. They always get so carried away with me and my hair grows so pitifully slowly.

 

[Sabine]

I totally get how you feel. I feel like I always "freeze up" when I''m at the hair stylists and don''t end up saying exactly what I mean or what I want, and then I go home mad at myself for not asking them to do something different. This definitely happened last time...I have short hair that is getting to be almost shoulder length with LOTS of layers from a cut I am growing out. I hate the layers, and told that to the hairstylist. But he told me that my hair was pretty fried from straightening, so he had to trim some off the layers, which I got. I just wish I would have told him to take MORE off the length to at least start cutting out the layers. When I left, my hair looked like it was exactly the same cut as before, only about 1/2 an inch shorter. I''ve found that I do MUCH better when I go in with a picture of exactly what I want, and much more disappointed when I leave things up to the stylist.

 

[gemgirl]

Date: 1/11/2009 8:50:57 AM
Author: Sabine
I totally get how you feel. I feel like I always ''freeze up'' when I''m at the hair stylists and don''t end up saying exactly what I mean or what I want, and then I go home mad at myself for not asking them to do something different. This definitely happened last time...I have short hair that is getting to be almost shoulder length with LOTS of layers from a cut I am growing out. I hate the layers, and told that to the hairstylist. But he told me that my hair was pretty fried from straightening, so he had to trim some off the layers, which I got. I just wish I would have told him to take MORE off the length to at least start cutting out the layers. When I left, my hair looked like it was exactly the same cut as before, only about 1/2 an inch shorter. I''ve found that I do MUCH better when I go in with a picture of exactly what I want, and much more disappointed when I leave things up to the stylist.

That''s an awfully big part of the problem with disappointing haircuts. The stylists don''t listen and they always think they know how we''ll look better. Ya'' know, I kind of think I KNOW how I''ll look better.....

 

[lyra]

Oh my gosh, I''m so sorry for you. I just got my hair cut and coloured on Friday and I''m thrilled. I notice though, that when I have to spend that much time at the salon (almost 3 hours), I actually start feeling depressed, even before I see any results at all. There''s a lot of emotion that goes into this sort of thing. We have some expectations and hope that we can achieve what we want, and sometimes communication is messed up. I think it may be a common thing to feel a letdown.

I have learned to spend money on my hair. I go to the best salon and only see the top stylist, who happens to be the owner. If he ever retires, I''m in big trouble!!!

I even send my daughters to him (they''re 18 and 21), because a good cut, even if it''s just really good bangs, is essential. They''ve both come to realize it matters who cuts your hair.

Ah well. At least we all know hair grows. When I''ve had a cut that I didn''t think was right for me, I''ve been known to grow it out for 5-6 months before returning to the salon at all. Then I can start fresh. YMMV of course. Good luck.