Find your diamond
Find your jewelry
shape
carat
color
clarity

Just having a small pity party

random_thought

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Jul 5, 2010
Messages
1,065
Honestly, no need to read this but I just need to get it out somewhere and out of my system.

I got notice on Friday that I'm getting laid off. I was given 6 weeks notice at the least. While we will be ok financially, this is a huge set back in our trying to conceive plans because all of the money we had saved will now be supplementing lost income.

In addition to all of this, I'm constantly worrying about my dad having a heart attack ever since we found out that he only has one working artery. He also is going to undergo chemo for cancer in his tongue next week. I worry about how stressful this will be on him.

C is starting kindergarten in 2 months and it just breaks my heart that this is likely the only time I'll have a little one for the rest of my life.

I'm in the middle of my grad school research class while dealing with all of this which is extremely demanding.

The 1 year anniversary of my mom's death is coming up in 2 months as well :(sad

Sigh. I really just want to punch something...or someone ....maybe my boss's face... :lol:

It'll be ok in the end, it always is. But, man, things just REALLY suck right now.
 

momhappy

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Mar 3, 2013
Messages
4,660
Oh, man.... I can definitely understand your need to have a pity party and I don't mind listening. I'm sorry that you're dealing with all of this stuff at once. I ran into a friend this morning who lost a child this year. I asked her how she was and she said she was crappy and that everything sucked (she has had to deal with some painful reminders over the past couple of months and it brings everything to the surface again and again and again...). I would have much rather heard the truth from her (how she was truly feeling) rather than the usual "I'm fine" response, so it's okay to have a pity party some times. Hugs to you.
 

junebug17

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Jun 17, 2009
Messages
12,188
RT, I'm so sorry you're going through such a rough and stressful time, you have a lot on your plate right now and you have every right to host your own little pity party - hang in there, try your best not to stress about your father's health, worrying isn't going to change whatever happens anyway - I know it's easier said than done, I'm doing my best to follow my own advice these days and it's not easy. I'm trying because chronic worrying is just so bad for our health. Big hugs to you, sending you lots of thoughts of comfort and strength, I hope you're in a better place soon. And keep venting if you need to, it does help!
 

Queenie60

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Sep 15, 2014
Messages
4,276
I'm sorry that you're dealing with so much stress right now. Slow down and take it one at at time - that's the only advise I can give. And it's okay to vent, free therapy!! The more you vent and process your frustrations, the better you will feel. Try to enjoy the good things in your life, especially that little one of yours. (((hugs)) - sending good thoughts your way.
 

VRBeauty

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Apr 2, 2006
Messages
10,228
That's such a lot to deal with, RT. You're more than entitled to a pity party! *DUST* going out for you to get some good news soon.
 

random_thought

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Jul 5, 2010
Messages
1,065
Thanks for the kind words everyone. I applied to a marketing position at the best infertility clinic in the country this morning (it's right by our house, just can't afford to go there lol). Hopefully this will alleviate at least some of my worries! And hopefully they offer a discount too ;))
 

msop04

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Dec 3, 2011
Messages
9,776
That's a lot to deal with, r_t... pity party is in order, if you ask me! [emoji17] I'm thinking of you and hoping things start to look up very soon! Hang in there, lady! [emoji1374]
 

PintoBean

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Jul 27, 2011
Messages
6,379
{{{Hugs}}}
 

Lady_Disdain

Ideal_Rock
Trade
Joined
Jul 25, 2008
Messages
3,988
Hang in there. And hang out with us here.
 

Gypsy

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Aug 8, 2005
Messages
40,198
I'm sorry honey, I imagine you are just running on empty right now.


Do you have any tiles? I find breaking tiles, just throwing them as hard as you can is really therapeutic.

Best wishes on the job front.
 

Dancing Fire

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Apr 3, 2004
Messages
31,540
RT...Hang in there. Hugs!
 

LLJsmom

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Oct 24, 2012
Messages
9,259
Random thought. I am so sorry you have so much going on. I totally get how you're feeling. I was just there. Truly. I felt like everything that could go wrong did. My DH got restructured out of a job. My dad was sick and was going to have emergency surgery. Then my DH had surgery. Then we had to spend about $20k out of the blue for some home maintenance issues. Then my insurance costs increased by 3x. All within two months. I can't believe we got through it. You will too. good luck with the job search. Hope that one works out for you!
 

missy

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Jun 8, 2008
Messages
33,957
Random Thought, I'm sorry you are going through such a stressful situation right now and sending you good luck dust and lots of good thoughts and (((hugs))) too.
 

CJ2008

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Dec 31, 2006
Messages
4,750
RT.

I've had HUGE pity parties over much LESS.

So please, you're entitled, with all you have going on.

Sending you good thoughts and hugs. Hope you get that job.
 

marcy

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Feb 27, 2007
Messages
23,768
I am sorry you are facing so many difficult things right now. Big hugs to you.

Marcy
 

iluvshinythings

Brilliant_Rock
Premium
Joined
May 15, 2009
Messages
826
It sounds like you have every right to a pity party. All of those things individually would be difficult to deal with but having to cope with it all at once is huge. I hope this tall mountain of suckage is over soon with a good outcome. {{{hugs to you}}}
 

Calliecake

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Jun 7, 2014
Messages
7,024
I'm so so sorry random thoughts. Just one of those things would be a lot to deal with so please vent all you want! As CJ said, we have all had pity party's over a lot less and can understand how hard this must be for you. Please try to enjoy the fun moments with your child and family. The one great thing about life is things can change in an instant so hopefully things will turn around and you will start getting some really great news. Please be kind to yourself and know you have support here. I'm so sorry honey.
 

azstonie

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Jul 1, 2014
Messages
3,758
Have that party and really GET DOWN!! It's not a party until one of the neighbors calls the police so make it loud :lol:

You've got a lot. The tincture of time is going to handle most of it. Hugs and dust to you until this has resolved.
 

Arcadian

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Sep 17, 2008
Messages
7,031
There are times you have to HAVE a pity party. I totally understand and am very sorry to hear about your circumstances. :cry:
 

caf

Brilliant_Rock
Premium
Joined
Nov 26, 2013
Messages
823
Sorry, so sorry.

Are you in Colorado ( I am) - if so, I hope you get the job!!! I think I know which clinic you are talking about. Dr. S helped me.

Things will get better. And another job will be right around the corner. And hopefully your dad will be stable. fingers crossed.
 

random_thought

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Jul 5, 2010
Messages
1,065
Thank you all for the kind words, it makes me feel so much better to know that I'm not crazy.
I think I hit a brick wall tonight, and while I felt bad doing it, I called up C's extracurricular activities to say we were taking a night to do nothing tonight. Between running non-stop and all the stress, I feel like just taking a super long nap!
 

random_thought

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Jul 5, 2010
Messages
1,065
caf|1465513988|4042414 said:
Sorry, so sorry.

Are you in Colorado ( I am) - if so, I hope you get the job!!! I think I know which clinic you are talking about. Dr. S helped me.

Things will get better. And another job will be right around the corner. And hopefully your dad will be stable. fingers crossed.
Yup, same clinic. Did you have ivf if you don't mind me asking? That's our next step, we just finished up with some failed iuis :(sad
 

caf

Brilliant_Rock
Premium
Joined
Nov 26, 2013
Messages
823
No, don't mind. I got pregnant literally a few weeks before I was to start IVF with Dr. S. Had a hysterosalpingogram performed by them (and I had had one before by a radiologist who said I would never conceive), had been on Clomid and something else I think and then I got pregnant. I used to call her my miracle baby. She is now 17 years old. :appl: Had her at 39. So this is a long time ago. But I know people who have gone since and conceived. They just have a very precise way of doing things. And they do procedures themselves. And once pregnant you stay with them for the first 12 weeks so they monitor you frequently. I spent a number of years at another clinic - good doctors but...no pregnancy. Infertility is so relentless. Sorry you are going through this.
 

Jambalaya

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Oct 2, 2014
Messages
3,548
Random, I'm really sorry. This is not a pity party; this is a person going through one of life's toughest times.

The first anniversary of your mom's death is a hard one indeed. And now you must be so worried about your dad, too. You are young for this to happen, but as time goes on, more people your age will go through it. Someone I know lost family members young, when no one else had, but then she said, "Ten years later, I'm much less alone in my losses." I was just talking with my therapist about how we really don't have much control over the circumstances we find ourselves in. It's terrible luck about your mom passing and now your dad being very sick, and I'm so very sorry that you are going through this.

About the job, you will find another one, I just know it. And then your baby plans won't have to be shelved. The job area is something you have much more control over than illness and death, and I know you'll make things happen for yourself.

In the meantime, many, many soft and gentle hugs to you.

J xxxxxxxxxx
 

random_thought

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Jul 5, 2010
Messages
1,065
caf|1465533751|4042518 said:
No, don't mind. I got pregnant literally a few weeks before I was to start IVF with Dr. S. Had a hysterosalpingogram performed by them (and I had had one before by a radiologist who said I would never conceive), had been on Clomid and something else I think and then I got pregnant. I used to call her my miracle baby. She is now 17 years old. :appl: Had her at 39. So this is a long time ago. But I know people who have gone since and conceived. They just have a very precise way of doing things. And they do procedures themselves. And once pregnant you stay with them for the first 12 weeks so they monitor you frequently. I spent a number of years at another clinic - good doctors but...no pregnancy. Infertility is so relentless. Sorry you are going through this.
Ah, ok, that's good info. I've had many HSGs and got pregnant in 2014 after that and my laparoscopy but then we miscarried :(sad Based on the last one I had, my tubes are open, but barely, the dye was pretty slow to get through it which is a bummer. That's why we tried IUI first but it looks like I either have a hydrosalpinx or my tubes are just wrecked from the endometriosis. I'd probably be looking at having my tubes removed first because if it is a hydrosalpinx, then ivf won't do a darn thing for us.
 

random_thought

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Jul 5, 2010
Messages
1,065
Jambalaya|1465534560|4042520 said:
Random, I'm really sorry. This is not a pity party; this is a person going through one of life's toughest times.

The first anniversary of your mom's death is a hard one indeed. And now you must be so worried about your dad, too. You are young for this to happen, but as time goes on, more people your age will go through it. Someone I know lost family members young, when no one else had, but then she said, "Ten years later, I'm much less alone in my losses." I was just talking with my therapist about how we really don't have much control over the circumstances we find ourselves in. It's terrible luck about your mom passing and now your dad being very sick, and I'm so very sorry that you are going through this.

About the job, you will find another one, I just know it. And then your baby plans won't have to be shelved. The job area is something you have much more control over than illness and death, and I know you'll make things happen for yourself.

In the meantime, many, many soft and gentle hugs to you.

J xxxxxxxxxx
Thank you for the kind words, they really made me feel a lot better today 8)
 

caf

Brilliant_Rock
Premium
Joined
Nov 26, 2013
Messages
823
That's similar to me. Don't give up hope. And try to go to Dr. S if possible. Truly my prospects were supposedly dismal. They don't know everything.
 
Be a part of the community It's free, join today!
    Three-stone engagement ring upgrade
    Three-stone engagement ring upgrade
    Vintage OEC Bracelet
    Vintage OEC Bracelet
    June’s Birthstone Trinity
    June’s Birthstone Trinity

Need Something Special?

Get a quote from multiple trusted and vetted jewelers.

Holloway Cut Advisor



Diamond Eye Candy

Click to view full-size image.
Top