is the back on this dress too sexy for a wedding?

[kcoursolle]

Hey all, you have been so helpful in the engagement process, and now I''m getting married. I ordered a dress from nordstroms.com for $188 and I love it! It''s exactly what I was looking for, clean lines, no train, simple and elegant. It will only require minor alterations. However...I''m a little concerned that the back might be a bit too sexy for a wedding. What do you think? It was a little hard to take these pictures myself, so sorry about the odd positions I''m in LOL. By the way my wedding will be in august next year in the midwest if that helps.

 

[kcoursolle]

Here''s the pics

 

[kcoursolle]

another

 

[kcoursolle]

Here''s the back, is it too sexy??

 

[kcoursolle]

another back picture. Maybe it''s fine, but I''ve never worn something this low in the back. I definitely feel beautiful in it, and it''s very flattering for my figure. Do you think my elderly relatives at the wedding would think it''s beautiful or skanky?

 

[ladykemma]

from a seamstress point of view, when you get it altered it it going to be pulled up about an inch?

how close it is to your butt crack? i can't quite see where your butt cheeks start.

will your church/synagogue allow it?

are there straps? would you consider ribbon satin straps? it looks like it droops in the back.

ok, i keep staring at it and it looks like the whole thing need to be lifted an inch.

you will need a bustier or some support .

 

[kcoursolle]

Ladykemma, I don''t think it will be pulled up at all. When it''s hemmed, it will probably be hemmed from the bottom. However, I could put a couple of stiches in the bottom tie in the back to make it fall slightly less low (maybe 1/2 inch). My butt crack is not visible in any way in the dress. I even tried bending over to see what would happen LOL. I would say that my butt crack is probably about 1.5-2in down past the bottom of the dress. I think the church would be fine with it, they are very socially liberal and the pastor performing the ceremony is a divorced woman.

I''m more concerned about if my elderly guests will think it is classy or too revealing. When I look at the pictures imagining someone else''s wedding, I would think that the woman had a very pretty dress...but I want to make sure that others will think it''s ok.


When you look at the gown, do you think pretty or skanky at first glance? Honest opinions welcomed! Be harse if need be, better now than at the wedding!!!

 

[robbie3982]

I think it''s absolutely gorgeous!

However, I''m 23, so not necessarily of the same mindset as your older relatives/guests. I think if you love it, and you think your fi will love it, then that''s all that matters.

. I really do think it''s beautiful though.

 

[aphisiglovessae]

I personally think it's a very pretty dress, but that's just because I like styles like that. I also like to show off a little curve and skin. It's all about what you're comfortable with and what you love. I wouldn't worry about what everyone else will think too much. After all, you can't please everyone and this is YOUR wedding.

 

[codex57]

My first thought was, "whoah, that''s pretty low in the back!"

However, I have also learned that you cannot please everyone and SOMEONE is going to be offended by something. I''ve gotten so frustrated and jaded by the whole wedding thing that I''ve adopted the oh so mature attitude of "Screw them. It''s your wedding. Do what you want and if they love/care about you, they''ll suck it up and get over it."

So, that''s my advice. If you love it, screw the old farts and wear it. There''s worse stuff on network tv anyways.

 

[bling*diva*]

~~I think it will be fine to wear to your wedding!! As long as you are comfortable in it, and it makes you feel good, then by all means wear it!!

 

[qtiekiki]

I think the dress is pretty. The back is not that low; it''s just the middle of the back and nowhere near the butt, let alone the butt crack. I agree with everyone who says that if you are comfortable in it, then wear it. You can''t please everyone, so just do what makes you happy.

 

[flopkins]

hm... well I dunnos, if you want the honest truth from me... I just don't like the back. I don't know why. I love the front on you. And it's very flattering. But it just doesn't do it for me. I don't think it has to do with how low it is, really... I'm just not feeling the style. My dress had a relatively low back too, so I'm not sure what it is exactly. Maybe cuz if I only saw the back it just doesn't look very wedding-y to me. Not sure what you're going for though, and if you love it then keep it!

Remember that during the ceremony everyone will be staring at teh back of your dress the entire time, so make sure you're comfortable with whatever they're looking at!! hehe. What does your mom think?

Anyway, it can only be a decision you can make...

ETA: if it's a big problem, you might be able to sew a white panel behind the crossovers? I dunnos if that would ruin the look of the dress though.

 

[kcoursolle]

I haven''t shown these to my mom yet since she is out of town, but I just sent them to my grandma. I told her to be brutally honest. She said that the front was adorable and flattering, but that the back was too revealing. However, she did think that maybe we could alter it in a way that would be ok, such as putting fabric in the back behind the ties in the back.

 

[ladykemma]

what i was trying to say it it simply looks like it doesn''t fit.

As a seamstress I would lift the dress from the imaginary shoulders, that would make everything sit where it is supposed to.

and take care of the hem problem at the same time.

 

[Aurelia]

Hi,

I''m not trying to rain on your parade here, but I think the dress looks a bit low. Not in a sexy way, but as though its just shifted down, or slipped. This is just me of course - you should wear whatever makes you feel beautiful.

Best of luck,

Aurelia

 

[FireGoddess]

Date: 8/3/2006 9:02:57 PM
Author: flopkins
hm... well I dunnos, if you want the honest truth from me... I just don''t like the back. I don''t know why. I love the front on you. And it''s very flattering. But it just doesn''t do it for me. I don''t think it has to do with how low it is, really... I''m just not feeling the style.

I have to resoundingly ditto this, IMO. I love the front and love the way the front looks on you. Not a fan of the back. Don''t like the design of it at all...nothing to do with how low it goes.

 

[ladykemma]

you will have to have the dress dry cleaned after this. put on a clean thin clingy t-shirt.

seamstress will have you put the dress on inside out and then she will hike the whole thing up. then she will pin it so it not shift/sliding down. (to fit your curves). that will pull the pretty back up higher, and the bust, and hips will sit where they are supposed to

right now it is pulling down. it''s pulling your boobs down and its resting on your hips.

it''s an easy fix.

 

[aljdewey]

Date: 8/3/2006 9:34:50 PM
Author: FireGoddess

Date: 8/3/2006 9:02:57 PM
Author: flopkins
hm... well I dunnos, if you want the honest truth from me... I just don''t like the back. I don''t know why. I love the front on you. And it''s very flattering. But it just doesn''t do it for me. I don''t think it has to do with how low it is, really... I''m just not feeling the style.

I have to resoundingly ditto this, IMO. I love the front and love the way the front looks on you. Not a fan of the back. Don''t like the design of it at all...nothing to do with how low it goes.

I hate to say it, but I agree with these ladies. From the back, that looks more like a casual sundress than wedding attire. The front looks beautiful, but your guests are going to be seeing a LOT of the back during your ceremony.

Maybe a fabric panel insert would improve it.

 

[kcoursolle]

thanks for your opinions, all are welcomed. I''m totally fine with those who have said it''s too low/not great in the back. The more I look at photos of the back I am starting to think the same thing. I think the fact that I was so enamored with the front distracted me from the not so great back.

 

[Gypsy]

It is STUNNING! And just looks amazing on you. I think that the back could be too sexy... but isn''t because of the elegant and understated lines of the dress as a whole. As it is I think it adds just the right unique kick to the gown. It''s beautiful. Seriously. It looks like a $5000 gown on you. Just amazing. I say go for it.

 

[oshinbreez]

Well, after looking at it a few times, I like it. It''s not like an ordinary wedding gown. I''m sure you could fix it so it isn''t so low. Are you going to be wearing a veil?

 

[TravelingGal]

Date: 8/3/2006 9:53:46 PM
Author: aljdewey

Date: 8/3/2006 9:34:50 PM
Author: FireGoddess

Date: 8/3/2006 9:02:57 PM
Author: flopkins
hm... well I dunnos, if you want the honest truth from me... I just don''t like the back. I don''t know why. I love the front on you. And it''s very flattering. But it just doesn''t do it for me. I don''t think it has to do with how low it is, really... I''m just not feeling the style.

I have to resoundingly ditto this, IMO. I love the front and love the way the front looks on you. Not a fan of the back. Don''t like the design of it at all...nothing to do with how low it goes.

I hate to say it, but I agree with these ladies. From the back, that looks more like a casual sundress than wedding attire. The front looks beautiful, but your guests are going to be seeing a LOT of the back during your ceremony.

Maybe a fabric panel insert would improve it.

Add me to the list of dittos.

 

[ladykemma]

before you return try this:

i think I see some ribbon straps. try safety pinning the ribbon straps shorter, to pull up the front and back higher. (higher in the armpits) just to see if this improves the look.

it''s a beautiful dress, it just needs to be professionallly altered to ride higher which will result in some cleavage and bust support and the so the back will not be droopy.

look at the third picture. see how low it''s hanging from your back armpit fold? should be an inch higher.

 

[diamondfan]

K, I like the lines on the front. the back is just not my cup of tea, and I think it is a bit much for a wedding...I am sure you could find a dress with a similar front but with a different back. The "height" is not the issue, rather, the openness of it just does not seem appropriate to me. Just my opinion, so of course you should wear what you love!

 

[Tybee]

Flopkins said exactly what I was thinking.
The front is lovely... but during the ceremony, everyone will be focused on your back.
I LOVE the front of the dress... very flattering, very pretty. I don''t love the back. It''s actually not very flattering.
Looks a bit low, and a little droopy... so so sorry, just want to be honest here.
Perhaps it could be altered, I"m not sure.

 

[nytemist]

I love it! Though I''m partial- I have a dress with a back like that, only it''s two ties. I think it makes a simple, classic, elegant statement. I truly don''t believe that your older guests will be put off... sometimes the older people are more liberal than we think. They''ll just be thrilled at seeing you get married. I would love for mine to fall as perfectly as yours does on you! Also, I agree with other that you can''t please everyone and it is your wedding. Heck, my mother is beyond upset that my wedding dress is lilac, but it''s our wedding.

 

[BrightSpot]

kcoursolle, that''s a lovely dress & it looks beautiful on you. Where are you getting married? I think this dress would look perfect on a beach, but I''m not sure I can picture it in a church. (It does look a little like a sundress to me from the back.) If you do decide to go for it, maybe you could wear a long or cathedral length veil to provide a bit of coverage in the back if you''re worried about it during the ceremony.

 

[eks6426]

ladykemma is right. The whole dress needs to go up about an inch. That will help it not seem so low. A good seamstress can fix it for you no problem. You might not even need to get it hemmed then..especially if you are wearing heels.

I love your dress. I seems very appropriate for a more casual wedding. If you are getting married ina church, I''d wear I very long veil to cover up the back a bit. Nothing fussy...just flowing tulle...to the floor.

 

[brazen_irish_hussy]

If you had a long veil it could cover a lot of the back during the ceremony if it makes you uncomfortable and then take it off for the reception.