I Think People Without Kids Have Empty Lives and I'm Not Sorry

[Jambalaya]

OK, I'm starting a new thread for this one. Riffing off the "family prefix" thread, what this writer actually says is that there is NO CHANCE that non-parents lives are as good as parents' lives. No chance!! It made me feel pretty bad, and I'm mostly fine with not having them!

"It’s a perfectly fine choice to never become a parent, but there is absolutely no chance that your life will be as full or meaningful, or that you will learn as many essential truths about existence, as you would if you had kids."

Parents? Is this true?? I never thought so, but the writer is so insistent, it brought up a ton of doubts.

I Think People Without Kids Have Empty Lives And I’m Not Sorry About It

There is absolutely no chance that your life will be as full or meaningful as you would if you had kids.

thoughtcatalog.com

 

[kenny]

I call BS when I hear ... "There is only one right way, and everyone must conform!"

Hows bout just leaving it at ... People Vary?

 

[Jambalaya]

I mean, I think people who suffer serious ill-health or grave accidents or terrible bereavements learn many essential truths about existence! Ask any cancer survivor!

 

[telephone89]

"or that you will learn as many essential truths about existence"
Did she drop LSD before writing this or something? Anyways, CFBC and ima read it. Brb.

 

[Daisys and Diamonds]

phew
lucky i knew it wasn't you saying that
this is a much too polite forum for me to say what i want to say with the language i want to use
but I'll just say i want to kick that woman in the shins

edit sorry i can't even get through all her 'im not being judgmental' drivel

everybodies life is different- its nobodies play to call out any group of people for having 'unfulfilled' lives

what about a nun (i love nuns) who marries God and dedicates her life selflessly to others
is her life unfulfilled because she has gone in a different direction

do people even say these kinds of things to blokes ?

 

[Jambalaya]

Kenny, I'd be happy to. It's just that the world is full of people who don't realize that people vary.

 

[Jambalaya]

The "no chance" thing was just too much. I'm sure Mother Theresa found her life meaningful!

 

[LemonMoonLex]

While I without a doubt do believe that there are some truths, lessons, and amazing experiences that being a mother gives you that you truly cannot experience elsewhere, I simutaneously, FULLY AND WHOLEHEARTEDLY do NOT believe that those of us who have chosen to procreate live more meaningful or more beautiful/fruitful lives.

If you are sometimes happy, and sometimes make others happy with or without kids....you live a meaningful life.

That author is so out of bounds and truly worded this so damn poorly.

I appologize on behalf of her idiocy and want to tell all of you women or men that have meaningfully chosen not to have kids that you are valued and loved. You are an integral part of our society and our childrens lives as well. ❤

 

[telephone89]

Ok, what the fuck?

"I’m not saying you can’t have a happy life without kids. Of course you can... You can also be happy as a racist, but that doesn’t make you an especially great person."

What a waste of an internet tab. She feels bad for child free? LOL OK. Go wipe a butt. Add that to the sanctimommy bullshit pile.

 

[telephone89]

do people even say these kinds of things to blokes ?

RIGHT?! Ugh.

 

[kenny]

Kenny, I'd be happy to. It's just that the world is full of people who don't realize that people vary.

I know.
Hence, my People Vary campaign.

My deep passion for it stems from being a gay boy growing up in the Christian midwest in the 50s and 60s.
It was hell and 100% BS.

 

[Jambalaya]

OK folks, it's bedtime. Until tomorrow

 

[lyra]

As a parent, I can say that childfree people have many advantages that I will never have. They have more money, more time to travel, more time to do whatever they want, less crushing debt that goes on for your entire life, not just 18 years! I could think of a bunch of positives. I'm okay with my choice, as everyone should be okay with their choice. I realize though, that some people desperately want kids and can't have them, and that must be hell. I'm also unlikely to have grandkids, which was hard to take at first, but now I'm getting over that too.

 

[Karl_K]

My reply is not suited for PS.
It goes something like this: #@#%^@$^@$^@$!^@$^@$^@$^@$#^@$#^$&%^(%(&$#^$#^$%^#^%#&$%*$^#&*$#&$%*$^* and %@#%^$^$#^$^$#^$#^$^@#%@#^$*%*&*^$&$.,,,,,,,,,beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep

 

[yssie]

Wonder if this twit feels that adopting children provides less fulfillment than having biological children? She does wax philosophical about the virtues of "creating another person".
Or that children raised with two same-sex parents have less meaningful futures?

 

[ItsMainelyYou]

All I can say is that I have a couple, and if any child-frees feel the burning need to learn some deep lesson about essential truths I am willing to loan them out for a weekend.
Seriously.
*And it has to be for the whole weekend.

 

[Tekate]

As my wonderful, Irish mother would say "Mind your own business" is what she should be doing. It would be nice to live in a world where we don't have to think our 'choice' is the best.

 

[elizat]

I'm not reading the article. It's nonsense. Everyone has different goals, wants, talents and paths. I feel reading it would use time I'd never get back!

 

[Bron357]

What nonsense.
Life is what you make it. It’s a combination of hard work and good fortune and the former we can work on, the latter we can’t.
I know many couples (we were expecting to be one such couple) that have no children. Sometimes its through choice, other times is due to issues beyond the couples control.
My life is different by having had a child, not necessarily better or necessarily worse. There are compromises I made career wise to take time away from work to be a hands on parent, there were are expenses incurred in education etc of said child that might otherwise have funded extra overseas travel , extra home renovations even better and more bling.
And you don’t have to be a parent to participate in children’s lives and share the joy (and horror) of small folk. You can be an aunt or uncle, a good friend even a neighbour. You can coach children’s sport, teach children, mind children, care for children as a career choice.

 

[Batgirl76]

I know several people who have lost a child and they are the saddest people I have ever met. No thanks.

 

[YadaYadaYada]

Some people are miserable with kids and some are miserable without them. Also just because you have them is no guarantee of anything. There are so many parents who have estranged relationships with their children.

There is no black and white answer here and you know the grass is always greener when someone else is doing the watering! Kids can be a blessing but some will try and kill you to get your inheritance, there is always a downside.

 

[GliderPoss]

Hmmmm... as a unexpectedly childless woman she touches on a few things I think are probably true and many more which are not.

"Because when it comes down to it, there are certain truths about life that you literally cannot know until you’ve become a parent". Yep I will never KNOW what it's like to bear a child but I can share love, care, empathy and compassion for those who do. I would die for any of my nieces or nephews.

"Having kids doesn’t have to be your primary and sole focus in life, although for some people it is." I also agree with this, having children can be wonderful but I don't expect it to be the ONLY positive thing in your life.

You absolutely have more free hours in the day and less on the line when you’re going through life without kids, but that doesn’t inherently make you capable of accomplishing more. I also agree with this - I've got all the time in the world but my sisters often squeeze in so much more in a day purely from necessity!

Conclusion: Do I think childless people have empty lives? Of course I f*cking don't. My life is just fine thank you very much.

 

[redwood66]

Too many people don't mind their own damn business. My DH has a t-shirt he wears to to work under his button down and it says "Of course your opinion matters, just not to me."

Sometimes I wonder how my kids made it to high school without an accident. Loved it but it was hard.

 

[Arcadian]

I said no to having kids at the age of 4. LOL. I made good on that.

 

[canuk-gal]

HI:

Not reading the "story".

People have empty lives with or without children.

cheers--Sharon

 

[Laila619]

As a mom, I do think that having kids is a pretty amazing and special thing! But different strokes for different folks. Parenthood is definitely not for everyone.

 

[Begonia]

Lived both lives: no kids and now kids (well almost grown sons). Sure, they enriched my life, but having them also stopped me from having other experiences. I call BS too Kenny. Big time.


However, there is a special kind of love and unconditional giving that emerged from me with them. I'm glad I've been given that chance.

 

[kenny]

... "Because when it comes down to it, there are certain truths about life that you literally cannot know until you’ve become a parent".
...

True, but big friggin whoop.
Being a parent doesn't make one superior.
By the same defective reasoning, the following could be claimed ...

there are certain truths about life that you literally cannot know until you’ve become a cancer victim".
...
there are certain truths about life that you literally cannot know until you’ve become a US president".
...
there are certain truths about life that you literally cannot know until you’ve become an astronaut in space".
...
there are certain truths about life that you literally cannot know until you’ve become a scuba diver".
...
there are certain truths about life that you literally cannot know until you’ve become a sky diver".
...
there are certain truths about life that you literally cannot know until you’ve become a Olympic gold medal winner".
...
there are certain truths about life that you literally cannot know until you’ve become a heroin addict".
...
there are certain truths about life that you literally cannot know until you’ve had an abortion".
...
there are certain truths about life that you literally cannot know until you’ve become a discriminated-against minority".

there are certain truths about life that you literally cannot know until you’ve been an innocent person convicted of a felony".


The list is endless.
How bout we just say, an experience teaches us things related to that experience.
Again, big whoop, with a Duh and a thrown in!

This is just another example of that rampant ugly human disease, Belikemeitis.

 

[lovedogs]

Ok, what the fuck?

"I’m not saying you can’t have a happy life without kids. Of course you can... You can also be happy as a racist, but that doesn’t make you an especially great person."

What a waste of an internet tab. She feels bad for child free? LOL OK. Go wipe a butt. Add that to the sanctimommy bullshit pile.

I literally hate the person who wrote this, and there are not enough 4-letter words for me to express my feelings without getting a time out. What an awful garbage person.

 

[nala]

OK, I'm starting a new thread for this one. Riffing off the "family prefix" thread, what this writer actually says is that there is NO CHANCE that non-parents lives are as good as parents' lives. No chance!! It made me feel pretty bad, and I'm mostly fine with not having them!

"It’s a perfectly fine choice to never become a parent, but there is absolutely no chance that your life will be as full or meaningful, or that you will learn as many essential truths about existence, as you would if you had kids."

Parents? Is this true?? I never thought so, but the writer is so insistent, it brought up a ton of doubts.

I Think People Without Kids Have Empty Lives And I’m Not Sorry About It

There is absolutely no chance that your life will be as full or meaningful as you would if you had kids.

thoughtcatalog.com

Do you think it would be helpful to share your doubts? We are her to listen...