I need to vent

[museikchik]

So let me start from the beginning. This past May I voluntarily quit my job. I was being overworked and underpaid. I saved enough money to be without a job for six months. I had just received my Master''s degree and was confident that I would have no problem finding another job. My husband and I had talked it over and he was okay with my decision to quit because he knew how much the job was stressing me out and how much I hated it. So I quit, we got married and had an awesome honeymoon.
Fast forward six months, I have applied to over 60 jobs varying from minimum wage positions to management positions and have not received one call back for an interview. I did have one company find my resume online and I met with them but the position was cancelled. I have had several different people look at my resume and tell me that it is really good. I have even changed the formatting four times just in case. I ran out of my savings like two months ago and my husband has been paying for all of our bills. I know that he is stressing out about money but I am really trying. Sometimes he makes comments that are meant to be funny but I feel like he is rubbing salt into the wound. I told him about it today and he just brushed me off. He always talks about how we can''t buy this or we can''t do that. I tell him at least he is able to leave and see the world whereas I am stuck at home all day because I can''t even afford to pay for gas. I am just really tired of him blaming all of this on me. Yes it is a sucky situation but it was a mutual decision.
I just feel like an idiot. My last ditch effort to try to get some spending money for Christmas is to apply for a job as a seasonal sales associate. It is really disheartening because that was my very first job when I was in high school. It feels like I went to school and got my degrees for nothing.
As much as it sucks not to have money, I don''t regret my decision to leave. I found out today that my BP was 118/80 when I was working it was 145/90. I was that stressed out over a company that didn''t even appreciate anything that I did. I just hope something comes up soon because I am going crazy being at home ALL the time.

 

[pjean]

I''m sorry. That sounds like a super stressful situation. I hope you get a seasonal job - it sounds like a little money + getting out of the house = win. Maybe it''ll give you momentum going into the new year.

Good luck!

 

[MissGotRocks]

I have a friend that retired from her job in December 2008 hoping to pick up something else. Two years ago, I am quite sure it wouldn't have been a problem. However, with the recession going full force, I strongly encouraged her to stay at that job until the economy got better for fear that there wouldn't be a job for her. She has applied for everything under the sun - that which she is highly qualified for and that which she really considers menial. No luck. Course she is in a different age bracket than you and that might possibly be a stumbling block but some applications didn't even ask for a birthdate so they could not have known her age.

Even though there seems to be some recovery, the job market still isn't looking good and unemployment still on the rise or perhaps just starting to level off. At this point, I wouldn't take any of the rejections or non-calls personally; it is just a bad time. In the meantime, I'd latch onto whatever I could just to get out and have some income. I'm sure your hubby is a bit dismayed as well and that's probably where the comments come from. Again, under normal conditions, you would have probably been able to secure a great position. I've learned from her that while a day off (or a few days off) from work can be fun and relaxing. Being permanently unemployed through no choice of your own becomes stressful in and of itself - it's hard to keep yourself occupied and entertained right on and on. It has certainly made me see retirement or downturns or layoffs through different eyes. I think when the time comes for me to retire, it will be very important for me to have another life plan so that I won't be aimlessly wandering around trying to pass time. That seems so unheard of for me but I've seen more than my share trying to do that - especially if they don't have lots of money to travel or participate in activities that they love. It then becomes a struggle to have some sort of productive routine going.

I think there are few people that haven't been affected by this economic downturn in one way or another. Hang in there and let's hope that 2010 is a much better year than 2009 was. I'm guessing we won't have any huge recovery but hopefully the jobs will start to emerge again.

Good luck!

 

[purrfectpear]

Let''s look at it from hubby''s perspective for a moment. It wasn''t really a "mutual" decision. YOU decided to quit. He just decided to support your decision in an attempt to be a good guy. Now he regrets the fact that you used poor judgement in quitting your job in this economy. Of course he says you guys can''t spend money and do extra things. Money isn''t going to sprout from trees ya know.

Things are bad enough without you projecting the guilt you feel from putting you guys in this position on to him IMO. Don''t let it cause problems. Accept the fact that it really was your decision and do your best to fix it.

With a Master''s is there any chance of working as a substitute teacher? Have you gone to every temp agency in town? Almost every corporation I know uses temp agencies. Good luck

 

[rhbgirl24]

I''m sorry, that is definitely a stressful situation. But I know how you feel. I have two B.S degrees and I work in foreclosure real estate - something I did in high school working IT. However it pays the bills, so just do what you can! and good luck!

 

[monarch64]

I agree with PP--don''t get upset with your husband because he''s getting antsy over your job and money situation. He has been supportive of your decision to quit your job and his patience is wearing thin with you not being able to find employment...can''t really blame the guy. How would you feel if the roles were reversed?

When you''re applying for minimum wage jobs, I''d leave out any information about your college education and see what happens. I think you''ll be surprised with the results.

Also--Christmas does NOT mean you have to spend money. Get over that and focus on getting a job to bring in income for your household instead. Make gifts or offer services if you really must give this season. Otherwise you''re not in a position to be spending money for the sake of spending it.

 

[iheartscience]

Date: 11/18/2009 10:27:31 AM
Author: purrfectpear
Let''s look at it from hubby''s perspective for a moment. It wasn''t really a ''mutual'' decision. YOU decided to quit. He just decided to support your decision in an attempt to be a good guy. Now he regrets the fact that you used poor judgement in quitting your job in this economy. Of course he says you guys can''t spend money and do extra things. Money isn''t going to sprout from trees ya know.

Things are bad enough without you projecting the guilt you feel from putting you guys in this position on to him IMO. Don''t let it cause problems. Accept the fact that it really was your decision and do your best to fix it.

With a Master''s is there any chance of working as a substitute teacher? Have you gone to every temp agency in town? Almost every corporation I know uses temp agencies. Good luck

Ditto. Quitting your job without another lined up in this economy is kind of insane and a Master''s degree doesn''t mean much these days. My husband''s good friend was unemployed for probably close to 2 years (he just got a job offer 2 weeks ago) and he has a Master''s degree from a VERY competitive school and program and is seriously one of the smartest people I''ve ever met. I''m really not trying to be mean, but if I were your husband I would be pretty irritated with you at this point, too.

With that said, I hope you find something soon! If I were you I would network my butt off, go to any group conferences/etc. in your field, get on Linked In, talk to your school''s career center, etc.

 

[jewelerman]

I completly understand your feelings and stress.Its hard to find a job these days and that is why i stay at this job where im also over worked and underpaid(a staff of 3 doing the work that was done a year ago by a staff of 7 on less hours and pay ).It took me 8 months to find the $8.00 an hour job I have now(in the 14 months ive been at the job we have had several people with masters degrees leave resumes for any open jobs at this hourly wage.)The stress that comes from looking for a job is hard on a person and When I graduated a few years ago I really thought it wouldnt be a problem finding a job because I had this new shiney degree,boy,was I wrong.Hang in there and know that many people are in your position either being un-employed or under-employed.Sit down with your husband and show him all that you are doing...keep a log of everything you are doing during the day to find a job.Team work between the two of you might help find a job faster than if you are looking alone!Good luck!~

 

[Madam Bijoux]

Would you consider working for the federal government?
This website shows all federal job vacancies in the U.S.:

http://www.usajobs.gov/

 

[jewelerman]

Date: 11/18/2009 4:53:03 AM
Author:museikchik
So let me start from the beginning. This past May I voluntarily quit my job. I was being overworked and underpaid. I saved enough money to be without a job for six months. I had just received my Master''s degree and was confident that I would have no problem finding another job. My husband and I had talked it over and he was okay with my decision to quit because he knew how much the job was stressing me out and how much I hated it. So I quit, we got married and had an awesome honeymoon.
Fast forward six months, I have applied to over 60 jobs varying from minimum wage positions to management positions and have not received one call back for an interview. I did have one company find my resume online and I met with them but the position was cancelled. I have had several different people look at my resume and tell me that it is really good. I have even changed the formatting four times just in case. I ran out of my savings like two months ago and my husband has been paying for all of our bills. I know that he is stressing out about money but I am really trying. Sometimes he makes comments that are meant to be funny but I feel like he is rubbing salt into the wound. I told him about it today and he just brushed me off. He always talks about how we can''t buy this or we can''t do that. I tell him at least he is able to leave and see the world whereas I am stuck at home all day because I can''t even afford to pay for gas. I am just really tired of him blaming all of this on me. Yes it is a sucky situation but it was a mutual decision.
I just feel like an idiot. My last ditch effort to try to get some spending money for Christmas is to apply for a job as a seasonal sales associate. It is really disheartening because that was my very first job when I was in high school. It feels like I went to school and got my degrees for nothing.
As much as it sucks not to have money, I don''t regret my decision to leave. I found out today that my BP was 118/80 when I was working it was 145/90. I was that stressed out over a company that didn''t even appreciate anything that I did. I just hope something comes up soon because I am going crazy being at home ALL the time.

Question...Is the seasonal job for spending money for Christmas gifts or to go toward bills?Word or Advise for you(and im saying this because ive been there last Christmas and this Christmas will be the same)If you cant afford gas money to get to job interviews then you should not be thinking about spending the little money you make on Christmas gifts!May sound harsh but your focus should be on getting a job,paying bills and the stress its causing in your relationship.

 

[vespergirl]

Wow, this situation reminds me a lot of my first marriage, but reversed. A month before our wedding, my ex-husband decided to quit his job that stressed him out and promised to find something he loved after we got married. Well, he never did go back to work (just a few barely part time menial jobs) and it caused A LOT of stress on our marriage, to the point of us getting divorced after two years.

While he "relieved his stress and followed his dreams," he doubled my stress level, leaving me alone to pay mortgage and car payments, while I was also in a boring, soul-sucking job. However, I had a sense of responsibility, and foreclosure simply was not an option for me, so I bit the bullet and did what I had to do. That eventually included letting go of the deadbeat husband, but it''s really not fair for one person to have to shoulder all the responsibility alone, especially when the unemployed partner decided to quit a lucrative job (their own decision/fault) and it wasn''t due to an unplanned layoff.

Sorry, but I am siding with your husband on this one. Are there nanny positions in your area? Where I live, people are always looking for educated, English-speaking nannies and generally pay pretty well. I also think the school system may be a good place to look ...

 

[oddoneout]

I totally understand trying to find a job with good education. It''s hard and really gets you down when your hard work doesn''t pay off. Good luck with the job search.

 

[princesss]

Unfortunately, most places have already gotten their seasonal employees by the end of October (at least, that's when the retail chains I worked for were done hiring).

It's a tough position to be in, that's for sure, and oddly the easiest way to find a job is when you have one. Have you been networking and exploring those resources? It's really important to get your face out there. Do you have a lot of work experience? Past contacts? Very successful friends? Do you live near any kind of public transportation (WAY cheaper than driving)? Personally, I'd be attending every free networking situation I could find, getting my face out there, draining every resource available to me until it was drier than the Sahara.

I'd try calling restaurants and country clubs around you to see if they need waiters. The hours suck, but there's such high turnover that you can almost always find a position. I wouldn't list your Masters degree (in lower income jobs that can cut you out of the running quickly - ever see that scene in American Beauty where Kevin Spacey applies to work at a fast food chain?), and I'd make it clear to any possible employer that you know that no job is beneath you - sometimes you've got to clean the bathroom, and it's never fun, but being broke is even less fun than that.

 

[TooPatient]

That is an awful place to be in. (for you and him)

Keep looking.You''ll find something.


Do you mind if I ask what your degree is in or what kind of work you do?

 

[Bia]

It''s not looking good right now, that''s the bottom line. I know because I am in a similar position (Master''s degree but could use some experience) and have applied to well over 60 jobs. I got one interview (for a job I didn''t apply for - they snagged my resume on Monster) and that was it! finito!

My one saving grace is that I haven''t quit my job. It is driving me crazy but it''s not miserable (yet!). I can''t imagine how I''d feel if I didn''t have a job.

My only advice is try networking. Reach out to people you know: colleagues, old professors, friends, aquaintances, family, etc. They might know someone who knows someone, you know? And post your resume on EVERY job board you can find. Keep trying, you''ll get something.

 

[museikchik]

Hi everyone, thanks for your support (for the most part).

Please understand that my husband''s comments were about his own spending and not mine. I am not the person who has to go shopping everyday and am definitely not complaining about not being able to. I do understand that money does not grow from trees. I am not blaming this situation on my husband this post was merely a vent in response to some hurtful things he said yesterday. I know that my husband is amazing and can completely understand his frustration. I had asked him sooner if he would like for me to go back to work in retail because that is what we used to do. He told me that he would much rather I have a position that I want and be happy in. I am not really the villian some of you are making me out to be. I would think the fact that I had applied to over 60 positions would show that I am not sitting around and am trying desperately to fix this situation.

I have applied to four staffing agencies and have applied for two teaching positions but have had no luck. I have been networking and so far I have two promising positions that I have applied for. If I were to get a seasonal job (if that is still possible), I would definitely hope that it would turn into something permanent so that we could have steady income.

 

[Haven]

I'm sorry you're so frustrated with your situation.

It sounds like you are a teacher, since you said you applied for two teaching jobs. Here are some ways to make a bit of money, if you do have teaching experience:

- Apply to adjunct at a local community college. You need to have a master's degree in your content, so it sounds like you'd be qualified for two content areas, potentially. Our local CC pays $830 per credit hour taught (per semester) for those with no experience.

- Tutor. People in my area pay a lot of money for tutoring, it can be a cash cow if you get some good clients.

- Substitute at the local school. You only need a bachelor's for this, and school around here only pay about $100 a day, but it's really easy work and it's something.

Do you have experience teaching? If so, keep on applying for jobs and tap all of your connections for leads and personal references. If not, I hate to break it to you that getting a master's without having teaching experience is typically a hit against your app because you'd cost a lot more and you have no experience actually teaching.

Good luck!

 

[Haven]

All the Barnes and Nobles by my house have openings, too. I know a lot of teachers who work there part-time and love it.

 

[museikchik]

Date: 11/18/2009 2:45:00 PM
Author: Haven
I''m sorry you''re so frustrated with your situation.

It sounds like you are a teacher, since you said you applied for two teaching jobs. Here are some ways to make a bit of money, if you do have teaching experience:

- Apply to adjunct at a local community college. You need to have a master''s degree in your content, so it sounds like you''d be qualified for two content areas, potentially. Our local CC pays $830 per credit hour taught (per semester) for those with no experience.

- Tutor. People in my area pay a lot of money for tutoring, it can be a cash cow if you get some good clients.

- Substitute at the local school. You only need a bachelor''s for this, and school around here only pay about $100 a day, but it''s really easy work and it''s something.

Do you have experience teaching? If so, keep on applying for jobs and tap all of your connections for leads and personal references. If not, I hate to break it to you that getting a master''s without having teaching experience is typically a hit against your app because you''d cost a lot more and you have no experience actually teaching.

Good luck!

Thanks Haven. Your cat is soo cute. I was a teaching assistant for a semester, that is the extent of my teaching experience. My specialty is in insurance and I did apply for an insurance instructor at the local community colleges. However, the competition is soo intense that they are extremely hard to get. I forgot about Barnes and Noble. I actually live there so I will apply there too. Thanks again you made me feel better.

 

[bookworm240]

As a stay at home mom I can agree that just getting out of the house can make a person happy. I am wondering if you volunteered a few hours a week, it might give structure to the day and make you feel like there is some forward momentum. You could always volunteer at a school (good way to get your foot in). Also this holiday season is going to be hard on a lot of people...solider''s, their families, under employed, etc. Maybe you could wrap gifts for friends, babysit while someone goes shopping, throw in a load of laundry for someone who is sick.

Sometimes just forward momentum can lead us to the next step....good luck.

 

[iheartscience]

Date: 11/18/2009 2:25:22 PM
Author: museikchik
Hi everyone, thanks for your support (for the most part).

Please understand that my husband''s comments were about his own spending and not mine. I am not the person who has to go shopping everyday and am definitely not complaining about not being able to. I do understand that money does not grow from trees. I am not blaming this situation on my husband this post was merely a vent in response to some hurtful things he said yesterday. I know that my husband is amazing and can completely understand his frustration. I had asked him sooner if he would like for me to go back to work in retail because that is what we used to do. He told me that he would much rather I have a position that I want and be happy in. I am not really the villian some of you are making me out to be. I would think the fact that I had applied to over 60 positions would show that I am not sitting around and am trying desperately to fix this situation.

I have applied to four staffing agencies and have applied for two teaching positions but have had no luck. I have been networking and so far I have two promising positions that I have applied for. If I were to get a seasonal job (if that is still possible), I would definitely hope that it would turn into something permanent so that we could have steady income.

I don''t think you''re a villain and I hope my post didn''t make you feel like that. I do think it''s crazy to quit a full time job in this economy and expect to get another one just because you have a Master''s degree. Plus it looks pretty bad to prospective employers when someone leaves a position without another one lined up. What will you say to them in interviews when they ask why you left?

Also, "overworked and underpaid" is pretty common in a lot of jobs these days because of the economy. Most places of business are cutting back on hiring and shifting duties to current employees, so a new job may not be any different.

 

[LGK]

Any chance you can start a small business? Even buying stuff at thrift stores and reselling on etsy or ebay is good for pocket money. One of my friends who''s handy with a sewing machine makes a some extra cash by purchasing clothes at Goodwill''s $0.99/lb bins and ripping them up and resewing them.

 

[museikchik]

Date: 11/18/2009 3:24:06 PM
Author: LittleGreyKitten
Any chance you can start a small business? Even buying stuff at thrift stores and reselling on etsy or ebay is good for pocket money. One of my friends who''s handy with a sewing machine makes a some extra cash by purchasing clothes at Goodwill''s $0.99/lb bins and ripping them up and resewing them.

I have thought about it but unfortunately I am not really crafty like your friend. I am open to that idea though.

 

[Smurfysmiles]

Date: 11/18/2009 3:09:19 PM
Author: bookworm240
As a stay at home mom I can agree that just getting out of the house can make a person happy. I am wondering if you volunteered a few hours a week, it might give structure to the day and make you feel like there is some forward momentum. You could always volunteer at a school (good way to get your foot in). Also this holiday season is going to be hard on a lot of people...solider''s, their families, under employed, etc. Maybe you could wrap gifts for friends, babysit while someone goes shopping, throw in a load of laundry for someone who is sick.


Sometimes just forward momentum can lead us to the next step....good luck.

Not to mention that volunteering looks good on a resume

 

[lulu]

What field do you have the Master''s in? What kind of job did you leave?

 

[Dancing Fire]

Date: 11/18/2009 10:55:51 AM
Author: rhbgirl24
I''m sorry, that is definitely a stressful situation. But I know how you feel. I have two B.S degrees and I work in foreclosure real estate - something I did in high school working IT. However it pays the bills, so just do what you can! and good luck!

i have one of those too.

 

[partgypsy]

First of all, thank your stars that you are in a stable relationship where at least 1 of you are working. There are many single folks, or folks where both people lost their jobs who are facing homelesses/losing everything, so things CAN be worse.
Second think about ways while you are out of work to be supportive to your spouse. That can include keeping the house clean, packing lunches, and thinking of ways of economizing in the household.
Third if there is anything you can do to relieve the burden of your spouse being the sole earner, do it, whether it is a part time job, a job not in your field, etc. You may need to hustle, put yourself out there but that''s that. It''s not just the income but that it shows to your spouse you are trying, that you are not comfortable with this situation.
Finally one of the worse things about unemployment is the toll it takes on your emotions and self-esteem, and that can affect and erode both yourself and the ones close to you. Keep in touch with people, and keep your day scheduled such as by exercising, spending x amount of time on job finding/development, or even volunteering. It will make you feel better and better adjusted to job life once you return to it.

 

[museikchik]

Date: 11/18/2009 5:20:44 PM
Author: Smurfyimproved

Date: 11/18/2009 3:09:19 PM
Author: bookworm240
As a stay at home mom I can agree that just getting out of the house can make a person happy. I am wondering if you volunteered a few hours a week, it might give structure to the day and make you feel like there is some forward momentum. You could always volunteer at a school (good way to get your foot in). Also this holiday season is going to be hard on a lot of people...solider''s, their families, under employed, etc. Maybe you could wrap gifts for friends, babysit while someone goes shopping, throw in a load of laundry for someone who is sick.


Sometimes just forward momentum can lead us to the next step....good luck.

Not to mention that volunteering looks good on a resume

Smurfy and bookworm: I do volunteer for an organization but that is only on occasion. I do need to look into other things. I have offered at many places but don''t usually hear back from anyone.

Lulu: I received my Master''s in Forensic Science with a Specialization in Investigation. There is a hiring freeze on all the county jobs right now which is where most of these positions are. I used to work as a Risk Management Assistant. I investigated worker''s compensation and general liability claims. It was very interesting but very tough. The company I worked for had over 10,000 employees. We received about 800 WC injuries and 200 general liability claims and there were only 3 of us in our department. Not only did we investigate the claims, we would contact each injured worker and inform them of the claims process. We would monitor the treatments given by the occupational clinics to ensure it was reasonable. We would contact the adjusters to make sure they had all necessary information to process the claim. There were a lot of different responsiblities I had. I just wasn''t feeling like the company appreciated my efforts and as crazy as it sounds I don''t believe in staying and working for a company if you are not happy.

 

[AprilBaby]

No advice but here is LOTS of Dust and wishes for something to come up soon!

 

[lulu]

Yes, governments and police departments are cutting costs. I hope you find something soon.