How well do you know your neighbors?

[soocool]

I have lived on my street for 16+ years and thought I knew most of my neighbors pretty well, especially the ones who have been here for about as long. Today while walking the dog, a couple asked me questions about the neighborhood and a neighbor's house and I started to become very suspicious of their questions and just said that I did not know the owners of the house well at all. I asked why they were so interested. They told me that they were thinking about bidding on the property. Huh? They said the property is up for a sheriff sale in less than 2 weeks. I have noticed a few cars stopping and looking at the property for the past few weeks which is an alert on my street because we are not a through street. In fact another neighbor called the police to check things out.

So apparently I can go online and see which properties are up for a sheriff sale. I found out that the property is in foreclosure and the outstanding amount is over $700,000 which I find interesting because both our homes were built at the same time (different builders- not a development) and the homeowner was the general contractor since he himself is a contractor so he couldn't have paid more than $300,000 over 16 years ago and that I think is too much because we have more land than he does. (house if the same sq footage). However, by searching online I found out much more about this neighbor. He pleaded guilty in at least 4 cases of taking money from people without ever starting the job. I feel particularly bad because I have given his name out to people who asked if I knew of such and such a contractor.Don't know if they ever contacted him, but I felt bad nonetheless.

Ok, so now I am a snoop and am checking out the other neighbors I know and another one has a long list of lawsuits pending against him. I thought something was wrong when his truck was gone. He is a builder/developer and in my opinion a real sleeze ball. My neighbors and I have had a problem with his dogs going after our dogs, neglecting one of his dogs, etc. (long story) He lives in an over 4,200 sq ft home with a huge in ground pool. He has 4 kids (20 - 26 yrs old) the eldest and youngest are still at home and one of them drives a Mercedes SUV. He hasn't paid his federal. state, and local taxes and has a slew of lawsuits for non payment to vendors and subcontractors. He threw a huge New Year's Eve party on Friday. Amazing. Apparently these lawsuits have been pending for over 5 years and I feel sorry for the people he stiffed while he enjoys himself.

So while I was not to surprised about one neighbor I was in shock about the other. So how well do you know your neighbors?

 

[yennyfire]

I would have said pretty well until I read your post. I guess you never really know people as well as you think you do.

 

[TooPatient]

Not as well as I'd like.

We all know which dogs live where, what kids are around, who lives in the neighborhood, and what cars are around. If there is anything out of place, the police get called (like the strange guy walking around the other day looking in windows where people weren't home).

There have been a couple of "neighborhood BBQ" things that were a lot of fun and a good way to meet people. The great ladies (I'm AWFUL at names...) who organized them were working on an emergency thing for our neighborhood that sounded like a wonderful idea -- they were getting a bunch of questions together so we could all have phone/e-mail contact for each person/house in the neighborhood in case of emergency (house fire, etc) and some other stuff like what emergency supplies each of us has and special skills and stuff.


I had NO idea our one neighbor had been struggling through a massive custody struggle with his ex-wife (drug adict).


Hmmmmm......... now I'm curious. (especially about the super creepy guy the next street over (his backyard and ours share a fence) since the house looks like it may be empty now??)

 

[Prana]

Not well at all. I went to highschool with one, he was a year ahead of me, 2 years ahead of my DH. The others we only know on a 'friendly wave' basis. I know nothing about their personal lives, where they work, etc.

How did you find all that out? Too funny...

It's true, you never expect people of things, and then when you find out, it's just crazy!

 

[kenny]

Reeeeeeeeally well.
I Looooooove our neighborhood.

Every summer we have a block party.
The city gives us a permit to block off the entire block to traffic.
They set out inflatable jump rooms, and have face painting and watermelon spitting contests for the kids.
We all put out BBQs and canopies to sit under.
The beer and wine flows and people share their favorite family recipes.
If I get enough alcohol in me I'll break out a guitar and sing some James Taylor songs.
As the sun goes down I bring out our portable fire pit and we'll all sit around it.

Neighbors here often invite each other over for impromptu drinks.
The houses were all built in the 1920s and most have front porches where people sit and wave at and chat with people going for walks.
It sounds like I'm making all this up but I'm not.

I can't believe this neighborhood.
We've been here over 10 years and nobody gives us any anti-gay vibes.
We are so lucky.

 

[onedrop]

We live in a small townhouse community with maybe 60 units total. When I first moved here about 10 years ago, the neighbors were much more friendly and eager to get to know each other. I'd let folks know when I'd be out of town, we'd accept packages for another, etc. However in the last few years many of the old neighbors have moved and the newer neighbors seem to be more transient (I guess because the newer neighbors are renters). I have a very different relationship with the new wave of people. That said, I *know* the neighbors to the immediate left and right to us fairly well, at least well enough to know that neighbors on the left went through a nasty divorce and were fighting over the house and the husband was refusing to pay his part of the mortgage (he moved out) and the house went to auction; and the neighbor to the right had a bad break-up with the live-in boyfriend who had to continue living in the home even after the "break up" for legal reasons. Other neighbors are just hello and goodbye folks. And most of the rest I don't know at all.

 

[soocool]

Reeeeeeeeally well.
I Looooooove our neighborhood.

Every summer we have a block party.
The city gives us a permit to block off the entire block to traffic.
They set out inflatable jump rooms, and have face painting and watermelon spitting contests for the kids.
We all put out BBQs and canopies to sit under.
The beer and wine flows and people share their favorite family recipes.
If I get enough alcohol in me I'll break out a guitar and sing some James Taylor songs.
As the sun goes down I bring out our portable fire pit and we'll all sit around it.

Neighbors here often invite each other over for impromptu drinks.
The houses were all built in the 1920s and most have front porches where people sit and wave at and chat with people going for walks.
It sounds like I'm making all this up but I'm not.

I can't believe this neighborhood.
We've been here over 10 years and nobody gives us any anti-gay vibes.
We are so lucky.

You are lucky Kenny. In my old neighborhood we were all very close. We all moved away around the same time and we are still friends and hang out. In this neighborhood I am closest with my next door neighbors who have lived here over 50 years and a few other neighbors. Even though they all wave and say hi, no one has ever bothered to get to know each other better.

 

[April20]

Well, right now I know my neighbors TOO well. But I'm in an unusual situation living a few doors down from two good friends we've known for years and years and that DH works with. There's no one else on our floor right now, so they're it.

Now at our house, not well at all. The house across the street and one next door have been empty for nearly two years. The neighbors to the other side we are friendly with, but don't know their names- though we do know the name of the dog!

I really shudder to think what I'd learn if I googled my neighbors. I live in an in-town city neighborhood and there is a great mix of people....

 

[Haven]

Not well at all, and I prefer to keep it that way.

 

[soocool]

Not well at all. I went to highschool with one, he was a year ahead of me, 2 years ahead of my DH. The others we only know on a 'friendly wave' basis. I know nothing about their personal lives, where they work, etc.

How did you find all that out? Too funny...

It's true, you never expect people of things, and then when you find out, it's just crazy!

Prana, it was so easy to find the info online. I googled sheriff sale and my county and it came up with a website that has a monthly sheriff sale listing and also has a search engine for county lawsuits that you can search by name, and also has a list of people with outstanding warrants. I also then googled the last name and it came up with the police blotter for the guy who pleaded guilty for taking people's money for work he never performed.

 

[zoebartlett]

We don't know our neighbors well at all. We've met them but we can't ever remember their names. They're all very nice though. I feel so guilty because we see each other coming and going often. I live in a condo development and I've lived in others over the years, and it seems like (for the most part) people keep to themselves. I wish it was different though -- I'd love to have neighborhood parties, etc.

 

[Prana]

I'm not familiar with the term 'sheriff sale'. I'm assuming this is along the same lines as a foreclosure?

 

[Imdanny]

I would have said pretty well until I read your post. I guess you never really know people as well as you think you do.

+1

And honestly I have enough to think about- I wouldn't want to know my neighbors any better.

 

[packrat]

I've got family in the neighborhood-I know them well haha. The rest, no. I know the neighbors to the right are very nice and we like them a lot, have known the Mrs about 20 years. They're both retired and know a lot of people, so sometimes we get the gossip if we're outside at the same time. The neighbors to the left are odd and I don't care for them. A few others we know pretty well, but the rest, not at all.

I can't imagine having a neighborhood like Kenny's. We got invited to a block party once when London was little..the people were not really our type, and I'm shy anyway..but the kids all were pretty rude to London and I had flashbacks to myself as a kid so we left. I grew up in the country and had a hard time getting used to having neighbors actually right next door rather than down the road.

 

[soocool]

I'm not familiar with the term 'sheriff sale'. I'm assuming this is along the same lines as a foreclosure?

Basically, it goes to auction.

 

[Skippy123]

Reeeeeeeeally well.
I Looooooove our neighborhood.

Every summer we have a block party.
The city gives us a permit to block off the entire block to traffic.
They set out inflatable jump rooms, and have face painting and watermelon spitting contests for the kids.
We all put out BBQs and canopies to sit under.
The beer and wine flows and people share their favorite family recipes.
If I get enough alcohol in me I'll break out a guitar and sing some James Taylor songs.
As the sun goes down I bring out our portable fire pit and we'll all sit around it.

Neighbors here often invite each other over for impromptu drinks.
The houses were all built in the 1920s and most have front porches where people sit and wave at and chat with people going for walks.
It sounds like I'm making all this up but I'm not.

I can't believe this neighborhood.
We've been here over 10 years and nobody gives us any anti-gay vibes.
We are so lucky.

OH MY GOSH, your Neighborhood sounds like my Neighborhood Kenny! Except our houses are not 1920s. We do have a summer parade too which is cute! I think I know my neighbors well but I think something strange like what happened to sooocool could happen to us too. You just never know. That is crazy though SC!!! One local realtor had some Ponzi scheme going and he lost his million dollar home, but he wasn't in my neighborhood.

 

[iLander]

I do NOT want to know our neighbors! I have been down that road (pun!) and every time it turned into trouble!

I used to throw block parties in my old neighborhood (much like Kenny's neighborhood) and got to be close with a neighbor across the street. Then one day she told me she had dreams about killing me and stuffing me into a plastic bag like the lady in Twin Peaks. Then she said she would move into my (bigger than hers) house and live with my husband (she was a single mom). It freaked me out, so I avoided her after that. This was tricky, since she was, well, a neighbor.

I have lots of freaky neighbor stories, I don't know if I'm just the "lucky" one or what. I could go on . . .

I recently heard a stat that 20% of the people move because of trouble with their neighbors.

Now I have perfect neighbors. We wave when we pass each other, call out a quick hello across the street and that's it. Perfect.

 

[soocool]

I do NOT want to know our neighbors! I have been down that road (pun!) and every time it turned into trouble!

I used to throw block parties in my old neighborhood (much like Kenny's neighborhood) and got to be close with a neighbor across the street. Then one day she told me she had dreams about killing me and stuffing me into a plastic bag like the lady in Twin Peaks. Then she said she would move into my (bigger than hers) house and live with my husband (she was a single mom). It freaked me out, so I avoided her after that. This was tricky, since she was, well, a neighbor.

I have lots of freaky neighbor stories, I don't know if I'm just the "lucky" one or what. I could go on . . .

I recently heard a stat that 20% of the people move because of trouble with their neighbors.

Now I have perfect neighbors. We wave when we pass each other, call out a quick hello across the street and that's it. Perfect.

iLander, I am sure happy I don't have a neighbor like that. My one neighbor used to work for the FBI (retired now) and every year an agent would interview the neighbors and ask detailed questions about his lifestyle.

 

[Dancing Fire]

i don't talk to them. one of my backyard neighbor still owes me $200 for their share of the fence which i paid in full...

 

[PilsnPinkysMom]

I know my current neighbors on a first-name basis, but we don't get together for neighborly gatherings. Perhaps as time passes we'll come to know them better... at least the handful that are similar in age to DH and me. Knowing my neighbors gives me an added sense of security.

I grew up in a neighborhood where neighbors all knew one another very, very well. I did not live in a development or subdivision, and there was a decent amount of space between the houses, but as kids we ran up and down the street to one another's houses, cutting through people's back yards. I spent as much time in my neighbors' homes (especially the two elderly ladies that lived next door... they were seriously my "additional grandmas") as my own.

 

[soocool]

I know my current neighbors on a first-name basis, but we don't get together for neighborly gatherings. Perhaps as time passes we'll come to know them better... at least the handful that are similar in age to DH and me. Knowing my neighbors gives me an added sense of security.

I grew up in a neighborhood where neighbors all knew one another very, very well. I did not live in a development or subdivision, and there was a decent amount of space between the houses, but as kids we ran up and down the street to one another's houses, cutting through people's back yards. I spent as much time in my neighbors' homes (especially the two elderly ladies that lived next door... they were seriously my "additional grandmas") as my own.

I grew up in a similar neighborhood in the 1960s and 70s. I remember a family in the neighborhood got a color TV (it was a console TV- huge) and all the kids in the neighborhood would go over to their house to watch Bonanza and Star Trek in color.

 

[swingirl]

Our block is a lot like Kenny's. We have a good slug of kids and a variety of people. Single mom, same-sex couple, professional cyclist, PhDs, firefighter, school principal, and everything in between. We don't really know each others' personal lives in detail but once or twice a year we drag out the barbeque grills, lawn chairs, fire pit and share the holiday. Our lots are small, windows are open—can't hide much. But you only know what someone tells you.

 

[JewelFreak]

It's great to see how many people live in friendly neighborhoods. I thought they were rarer these days. Ours is wonderful too. Small-ish w/properties from 1 acre to 15 acres & everything in between. A circle w/one entrance so anybody going by should belong here. Kids & dogs playing in the street, most people know each other & of course all of everybody's business; we watch houses when somebody goes away, take casseroles in tough times, etc. There are young people w/babies all the way up to retired folks who moved here 25 yrs ago.

My next-door neighbors on one side are not so terrific, however. Everybody growls about them. The parents work very late every night & on Saturdays, are not home on Sundays. The 3 kids have brought themselves up, now in high school & college. Bored, they get one animal after another -- but parents refuse to spend a dime on pets or have them in the house. So little defenseless critters run around loose -- the last was a Pomeranian, for pete's sake; you don't have Poms living outside in 20 degree weather! He spent half the day crying piteously, howling, pleading, at our door to come in, shivering in the cold. Never vaccinated, never vetted. I finally popped him into a crate & took him to a friend of mine, who adopted & adores him. (Ssshhhh.) He is the 6th dog they've had in 4 yrs. All disappear -- one was the sweetest, cutest, golden retriever pup whom they left outside loose & never spayed. The kids won't tell anyone what they did with her -- neighbors' theory is that she got pregnant on her first season & the parents didn't want to bother w/her, god only knows how they "disposed" of her. For a while the kids had, sheesh, a bunch of chickens -- nowhere to keep them so they were crammed into a dog crate in the garage w/out room to move. Eventually dogs got to them & killed them -- several rabbits ditto. Animal control is useless, no laws down here, at least none that are enforced. Very sad. We all wish they'd move away.

Otherwise it's like the neighborhood where I grew up; thought they were mostly gone, but am lucky to have landed in another one!

--- Laurie

 

[luv2sparkle]

Our neighborhood started out like Kenny's when we moved here 6 years ago, but has since degraded. Some neighbors have moved
and we just don't like, a couple people have had serious health issues keeping them from even being seen anymore.

One neighbor just had their house auctioned off. I don't know how long they hadn't made payments, but in the last year they have
taken a few long vacations, bought motorcycles and have a HUGE motorhome and a boat. I would have got rid of my toys to save
my house. I am guessing that they just didn't want it, and were upside down. That really surprised us.

 

[elrohwen]

Not at all! I couldn't even tell you the names of the people who live next door to us (well, I think I know their last name because the mailman writes it inside of our mailboxes and theirs always falls open when we open ours). Anyway, it's a moderately sized townhouse community and we don't know a soul other than "There's the lady with the cute beagle." "Oh, there's the couple with the two boston terriers." Lol


Growing up I was extremely close to my next door neighbors and my parents still are. My mom and the wife are pretty much best friends and I'm far closer to that family than my own aunts, uncles, and cousins. I think we got lucky with them.


When DH and I buy a house later this year I hope to get to know my neighbors - maybe not to hang out at each other's houses, but at least enough to pick up mail or water some plants (maybe even to feed the animals if we're coming home late).

 

[JewelFreak]

In our first place, a condo in Amsterdam when we were 1st married, we had downstairs neighbors who gave me laughs. Two old ladies, retired teachers. At that point I spoke ZERO Dutch & understood less than nothing. In the elevator one day, they had a conversation with me -- asked me cheerful questions, made comments -- about what, I had NO idea. I just kept nodding w/a smile & replying, "Ja. Ja." (Yes.)

When they next encountered DH, who is Dutch, they raved. "Oh, your wife speaks SUCH wonderful Dutch! Where did she learn it? We were SO impressed." We had a good cackle out of that. Nice old tabbies.

--- Laurie

 

[MichelleCarmen]

From the Smith's Death of a Disco Dancer: "I never talk to my neighbor, I'd rather not get involved."

We've moved 8 times in the last 10 1/2 years (and I've moved many more times before getting married) and have experienced nearly EVERY situation.

The only perfect one was a house we rented a year and a half back.

Among those neighbors were:
Keep to self ones
Wave and just say hi
Light conversation ones
Friends & kids played together
Have drinks/dinner with and are friends

The other places have included the above and then also we've had:
The neighbors who do not make eye contact
The ones we hate and bicker with.

Right now, am trying to avoid any conversation w/people I live by because even though their nice, there are a few minor issues w/landloard which have turned me off and talk inevitable turns to that. Like the crazy water bill, etc. Also there is a single mom who wanted me to drive her son to school every day. Our kids would be going to the same school had I not gotten a variance for mine and it would have become an obligation, so I see the kid walking in 20 degree weather by himself every morning while I drive mine and it's SUPER awkward. ETA - the schools are in the opposite direction...

My DH hasn't heard the Smiths song, but has said "do not get involved."

 

[MichelleCarmen]

? They said the property is up for a sheriff sale in less than 2 weeks. ?

That's sad about your neighbors house being in foreclosure. When we rented our townhome, an ambulance came to a unit across from us and apparently the guy had a heart attack. A short time after, a notice for sherriff sale had been posted on the door!

 

[partgypsy]

Kenny I'm going to say something politically incorrect, but um same sex partners bring up property values . I'm only partly kidding. One neighborhood in our town has a strong gay lesbian presence, and many of the houses have the highest price per square feet in our city (range of small to large older houses in arts and crafts era). They block off the area for Halloween, with people going all out with decorations and festivities. Anyways regardless of orientation the people who live in that neighborhood have a strong neighborhoody feeling and pay alot of attention to house maintance and landscaping. And everyone likes neighbors like that!

 

[soocool]

? They said the property is up for a sheriff sale in less than 2 weeks. ?

That's sad about your neighbors house being in foreclosure. When we rented our townhome, an ambulance came to a unit across from us and apparently the guy had a heart attack. A short time after, a notice for sherriff sale had been posted on the door!

A friend lives near a house that just sold at an auction. The owner (a guy who lived there his entire life) inherited the house from his dad. The house has been severely neglected.I see the house whenever I go visit my friend. The garage door doesn't shut all the way, the gutters are down, weeds as tall as the house cover the front, there are towels hanging over the windows instead of curtains. Also, he has no running water or electricity (electric turned off because he hadn't paid his bill in ages), and his septic failed and there is a huge sink hole in the backyard. There have been tax liens on the house. The house was sold at auction late in 2010 and one day after Thanksgiving the people across the street noticed what looked like a pile of clothes near the garage door. The woman went over and it was the guy who was lying there for who knows how long. Apparently he suffered a heart attack and died. He was 47 and from what my friend tells me, he had no family or friends. All the neighbors despised him. What a lonely way to die.