how to get hints on a proposal approaching?

[pannini]

so for those who have are no longer LIWs or for those who are successful at getting some idea of when to start getting hopeful for a proposal, how did you get hints on when he might do it?

i don''t want to be the crazy gf that keeps nagging and poking him for an ETA lol. so what is the most tasteful way of asking if it''s coming this week or not?! please, before i drive myself insane wondering if it will be tomorrow or next month.

how do i stop fixating on that moment happening and focusing on other stuff?

 

[purselover]

I doubt my answer will help you but I knew it was coming soon when he got the rings from my parents. We also had a trip planned to see his extended family around that time and I knew he''d probably want to tell them all at once in person.

 

[D&T]

I honestly had no idea, I even suggested to go out and ring shop some more hours before the proposal. DH ended proposing to me on the most hideous looking day that I had, I can I can still remember what I wore and look like til this day, of course we had pictures of it too. So I think of just being in the moment, because what I thought I would look like versus what actually happened is completely on opposite side of the spectrum. I think you should just enjoy and have him spring it on you that will be the most memorable just my personal thoughts though. I found that the more I poked around, the more irritated DH was, so I stopped altogether and just suggested ring shopping some more (I think he had to give the ring to me so I would stop ....lol)

 

[Dannielle]

His brother spilled the beans while intoxicated.. I thought he was kidding until I looked at my best friend and her jaw was on the floor followed by her giving him a solid punch on the shoulder

 

[pannini]

Date: 8/12/2009 12:15:43 AM
Author: Dannielle
His brother spilled the beans while intoxicated.. I thought he was kidding until I looked at my best friend and her jaw was on the floor followed by her giving him a solid punch on the shoulder

hilarious!

 

[Nomsdeplume]

I wouldn''t want to spoil the surprise. So just put your hands over your ears and sing. "La la LA LA LA!"

 

[gwendolyn]

Date: 8/11/2009 3:53:15 PM
Author:pannini
so for those who have are no longer LIWs or for those who are successful at getting some idea of when to start getting hopeful for a proposal, how did you get hints on when he might do it?


i don''t want to be the crazy gf that keeps nagging and poking him for an ETA lol. so what is the most tasteful way of asking if it''s coming this week or not?! please, before i drive myself insane wondering if it will be tomorrow or next month.


how do i stop fixating on that moment happening and focusing on other stuff?

You don''t seriously expect him to tell you what day or even week it''s going to be, do you?

Best plan would be to say to him, "Look, I don''t want to drive either of us crazy, so can you please let me know that, for SURE, we will be engaged by, say, October? Thanksgiving? New Year''s Eve? That way I can stop poking you about this, and you can go about your business orchestrating the biggest, most romantic and wonderful surprise of my life, oh wonderful love of mine." Or something to that effect.

The bad news is that, he probably will let you know in terms of months, even if he does plan to propose next weekend, because it''s SUPPOSED TO BE A SURPRISE. So stop trying to ruin his fun!

 

[pannini]

Date: 8/12/2009 8:45:53 AM
Author: gwendolyn

Date: 8/11/2009 3:53:15 PM

Author:pannini

so for those who have are no longer LIWs or for those who are successful at getting some idea of when to start getting hopeful for a proposal, how did you get hints on when he might do it?



i don''t want to be the crazy gf that keeps nagging and poking him for an ETA lol. so what is the most tasteful way of asking if it''s coming this week or not?! please, before i drive myself insane wondering if it will be tomorrow or next month.



how do i stop fixating on that moment happening and focusing on other stuff?

You don''t seriously expect him to tell you what day or even week it''s going to be, do you?

Best plan would be to say to him, ''Look, I don''t want to drive either of us crazy, so can you please let me know that, for SURE, we will be engaged by, say, October? Thanksgiving? New Year''s Eve? That way I can stop poking you about this, and you can go about your business orchestrating the biggest, most romantic and wonderful surprise of my life, oh wonderful love of mine.'' Or something to that effect.

The bad news is that, he probably will let you know in terms of months, even if he does plan to propose next weekend, because it''s SUPPOSED TO BE A SURPRISE. So stop trying to ruin his fun!

You''re so right Gwendolyn. Actually, I came to this realization before I read your response. Over the weekend we had an intense time getting settled into a new Long Distance Relationship lifestyle. You''ll see in my other LIW post about that whole thing. So bittersweet. I''m still sad and miss him, and can only look forward to the next time I spend some uber romantic weekend with him. I am more grateful he loves me so much and that I can love someone back.

 

[trillionaire]

My FI is adamantly opposed to deadlines, timelines, ultimatums, hints, etc. A surprise is supposed to be a SURPRISE according to him! (he hates it when couples go ring shopping together, thinks it ruins the surprise

)

I was doing fine with it all, until I knew that he had the ring, and I was fine with that for about 6 months... then the crazies started going in my head *hey, maybe he changed his mind!*

) All that to say, the less information you have, the better off you probably are. It''s more fun to be surprised and caught off guard, which I was utterly and completely! I was 100% certain that I would know when he was going to do it, and I dismissed every single clue and got blindsided.

If you''ve talked seriously about getting engaged, and you know he is going to do it, then trust him to do it before you lose your mind. It''s so funny to read all of the stories on this board about how women were on the verge of meltdowns, ultimatums, huge fights, break-ups, and right before the woman hit her breaking point, he proposes. Just like that, out of the blue.

So enjoy the lovely gals here, and may your stay be short and sweet!

 

[lulu66]

well, since mine just happened i can easily point to the little hints i missed:
1) my jewelry box was disheveled--rings were not in the place where i always put them. i thought i just must be going crazy and put them in the wrong spots.
2) he was keeping himself really busy that day. went for a jog, mowed the lawn, weedwhacked...
3) he asked if my dad had a cell phone #. he claimed he needed to talk to him about gardening; fi (!) wants to start a backyard garden next year. i answered that dad doesn''t & just to call the house to talk to him.

that''s all i can think of now...but it''s much easier to see these in hindsight.