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HELP! I am an old tomboy who has never worn rings!

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tara81662l

Rough_Rock
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Dec 31, 2007
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Greetings and almost happy new years to everyone!

Well, I came across this site a week ago while trying to navigate my way to picking out my engagement/wedding ring. So here is the short story, from someone who is known for many words!

My boyfriend (now fiance) and I have been together for over 10 years. We have a 4 year old daughter and we always figured we would get married when the time was right. Well, our wonderful daughter has been asking us some very pointed questions like "when did you get married"? So we are now going to do so on Valentines Day, 2008.

So here is my dilimma. I have NEVER worn rings and this 45 year old, tomboy-in-spirit realized when I went to a local jeweler that I dislike most settings. Yikes! What I did find myself liking were rings that seemed to lay somewhat flat on my finger (as opposed to a solitairre, etc). I have no idea if that is a certain style or not. The attached picture is an example of something I liked on my finger. The round diamond is loose and sitting on top.

The jeweler described the diamonds as g to h in color and S1 to S2. She said it didn''t make much difference what the stone was as this was a gift of "love" instead of an investment. That sounds kike of scary/fishy to me.

Well, my question is, if the band is as described, does it even make sense for me to search for a nicer color/clarity stone? Do most ring buyers try to stay consistent in quality with the setting as they do the main diamond? If you get a nice stone, does putting it on a band of lesser quality cheapen it up immediately?

Truthfully, I like knowing I am getting value for my money. I also don''t want to put in effort if it doesn''t make sense. I do like what she showed me, but if a round, G to H stone of S1 quality (.65 carat) at $1700 is priced high, it seems to make sense to shop around for a better quality or larger stone. (I would like .75 to 1 carat)

Finally, I will post one other photo in a second post (couldn''t figure out how to do it) as I have a question about how the band is made.

Thanks to everyone. I have read a bunch of great stuff on this site. I am better off for it, although I have a long way to go...in a short amount of time! It is possible that the quality of what I am shopping for is lower than the standards of the posters here. If that is the case, I am sorry to trouble you.

IMG_2438A ring.JPG
 

Part 2 from TARA81662L


OK, thanks for bearing with me so I can post a second picture.


The picture is of a band I like on my finger. (See previous post for another view of it with a loose diamond sitting on top)


My question is I have been to a few jewelers to get a feel for what I like on my finger and seem to gravitate to something that from an overview shot appears to lie flatter going across my finger.


I am currious if this band is common as I haven''t been able to find it to compare slight variations. I know from your postings there are some that get a ring made from scratch or a template like whiteflash. Given that I disliked so many rings I tried on, I would be hesitent to order over the internet, unless it is common for a jeweler to recreate a ring you show them.


The band is described as a stones in G to H color. Honestly I can''t recall if it is white gold or platinum. The price quoted was $1700. If anyone has an opinion on how that sounds I would love to hear it!


Finally, even though the overhead view of the band lays flat across my finger, this attached photo will show that it actually sits up a bit. Is that a common practice. What do all of the tube-like pieces do. Are they there just to lift it off of the finger? I don''t think there are any diamonds in them. Is it just style?


From my quite newbie perspective, it seems like it would be complicated for someone to duplicate that if $1700 seems overpriced.


Thanks for your input, advice, etc. I appreciate you responding to my rookie questions!





IMG_2441Aring.JPG
 
Hmm... I don''t like what you were told about it being a gift of love and not an investment. I can tell you that I don''t care if it''s a gift of love, a trinket or an investment, I want the best that my money can buy for any purpose. I do not buy things if I know I''m getting subpar quality for my money.

With that said - you can find a SI1 or SI2 that is eye clean. SI1''s are quite common on this site. SI2''s you will find that are eye clean from some of the girls here. One thing that I have learned, if you get an exceptionally well cut round, you can afford more flexibility in color. The ring in my avatar (small picture, I know) is a J - here''s a link to the post with pics - https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/its-done.71834/

If you use the cut quality search available on the PS home page you will see a number of diamonds within your size range offered by various, reputable vendors that PSers use on a regular basis.

Here are some stones in the size you are looking at and close to that price point (these were found by using the search on the home page):
http://www.jamesallen.com/diamonds/H-SI2-Ideal-Cut-Round-Diamond-1111638.asp?b=16&a=12&c=77&cid=131
http://www.jamesallen.com/diamonds/H-SI2-Ideal-Cut-Round-Diamond-1111639.asp?b=16&a=12&c=77&cid=131
http://www.goodoldgold.com/diamond/3769/
http://www.whiteflash.com/hearts_arrows/A-Cut-Above-H-A-cut-diamond-283253.htm

Pearlmans (you can find them listed under Resources and then under Diamond Vendors) has a HUGE selection of settings, you can look at all kinds of styles to see what you like.

I hope this helps a little. Good luck on the search!!
 
Welcome Tara and Happy New Year. Here is a setting that looks similar http://www.pearlmansjewelers.com/jewelry-specials/previously-owned-jewelry/rings/096PO1/0/ Look through Perlman''s like Jypsie said and you can find lots of rings. If you give us a budget we will help you find a gorgeous stone.
The vendor probably showed you an average cut diamond; here on Pricescope we learned cut is king which also makes a gorgeous stone sparkle like mad. Ask away, we are happy to answer any questions; we were in your shoes at one point too!!
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I''m a little confused. Was the setting $1700 or was the diamond $1700? I do not think you could have that setting custom made for less than $1700. But I am sure you can get a fine quality diamond by searching here. What is the budget for the stone?

And welcome and happy new year, too!
 
Date: 12/31/2007 11:12:35 PM
Author:tara81662l
Greetings and almost happy new years to everyone!

Well, I came across this site a week ago while trying to navigate my way to picking out my engagement/wedding ring. So here is the short story, from someone who is known for many words!

My boyfriend (now fiance) and I have been together for over 10 years. We have a 4 year old daughter and we always figured we would get married when the time was right. Well, our wonderful daughter has been asking us some very pointed questions like 'when did you get married'? So we are now going to do so on Valentines Day, 2008.

So here is my dilimma. I have NEVER worn rings and this 45 year old, tomboy-in-spirit realized when I went to a local jeweler that I dislike most settings. Yikes! What I did find myself liking were rings that seemed to lay somewhat flat on my finger (as opposed to a solitairre, etc). I have no idea if that is a certain style or not. The attached picture is an example of something I liked on my finger. The round diamond is loose and sitting on top.

The jeweler described the diamonds as g to h in color and S1 to S2. She said it didn't make much difference what the stone was as this was a gift of 'love' instead of an investment. That sounds kike of scary/fishy to me.

Well, my question is, if the band is as described, does it even make sense for me to search for a nicer color/clarity stone? Do most ring buyers try to stay consistent in quality with the setting as they do the main diamond? If you get a nice stone, does putting it on a band of lesser quality cheapen it up immediately?

Truthfully, I like knowing I am getting value for my money. I also don't want to put in effort if it doesn't make sense. I do like what she showed me, but if a round, G to H stone of S1 quality (.65 carat) at $1700 is priced high, it seems to make sense to shop around for a better quality or larger stone. (I would like .75 to 1 carat)

Finally, I will post one other photo in a second post (couldn't figure out how to do it) as I have a question about how the band is made.

Thanks to everyone. I have read a bunch of great stuff on this site. I am better off for it, although I have a long way to go...in a short amount of time! It is possible that the quality of what I am shopping for is lower than the standards of the posters here. If that is the case, I am sorry to trouble you.
Click to expand...
Congratulations on the upcoming engagemment tara81662l!
36.gif


With regards to the ring, I agree with Jypsie that although the ring is a gift of love, jewelry has a 'value' tied to it. As consumers, it is our entitlement to know what exactly we are paying for.

If you like the diamond to lie flat on your hand, you can consider design where the diamond is 'embedded' in the band. I'm sure the Online Jewelers will be able to custom design one for you like below:

Michael Bondanza


Michael Bondanza.jpg
 
More "Flat" Styles....

Scholdt


Scholdt ERings.jpg
 
I have more styles on file if you would like to see them and get more ideas, but I do find these easier to custom make compared to the one you posted.

The "tubes" you mentioned on that ring are probably just for design purposes, and if you love that design than I''d say purchase it, rather than get one custom made which would probably cost you more even if it were made in White Gold. But the more experienced shoppers please feel free to correct me.
41.gif
 
I agree with Bling that if you love that setting, you should just get it. But first, choose your diamond so that the ring can be ordered with the right size head for the stone (and the right size for your finger). Then send the setting to the vendor you buy the diamond from to set the stone so that the stone will be covered for damage while being set. You can get much better quality diamonds in general from reliable online vendors that specialize in excellent quality stones. But there really isn''t significant savings on buying settings online, so you can buy the setting just about anywhere as long as it meets your quality requirements.
 

Wow!

Thanks to all of you incredible folks for weighing in on my diamond search.

36.gif
Some of your comments and questions made me think of a few more myself.


I was asked for a budget so I would like to see what I can find for $2300 to $3300. Looking for a round diamond, ideal or premium cut (since I learned cut is king on this forum!), .65 to 1 carat, color F to H, and VS1 to SI1 (or SI2 unless you recommend I stay away from them)


I also noted a recommendation to buy the diamong first so the ring can be ordered with the right size head for the stone (and the right size for your finger). Then send the setting to the vendor you buy the diamond from to set the stone so that the stone will be covered for damage while being set. So many things I have not thought about. I had the impression that the setting I like is the only one this store has like it. If that is the case, is it common to have them change the "head" if it is the wrong size???


Finally, I used the cut search engine, thanks! Below are some stones I found. Please comment if you have time or recommend others that are similar. I included some with links only, 2 from craigslist and others with details. Sorry for the longer post. I did warn you that brevity is not my strongest skill.


Link Only, no details


http://www.jamesallen.com/diamonds/F-SI2-Ideal-Cut-Round-Diamond-1047599.asp?b=16&a=12&c=77&cid=131


Craigslist Round Diamond already in a ring: http://westpalmbeach.craigslist.org/jwl/493378084.html (Not sure if taking a diamond out of a ring to use for another is a good or bad??


Craigslist: This is a princess cut but seemed to be good if the GIA report is real. Listed as 1.01ct PRINCESS CUT LOOSE DIAMOND F / VS1 - $4000. He said I could get it for $3500 which is top of my budget. http://miami.craigslist.org/jwl/491049839.html


_______________________________________________________________________________


Links with details below:



http://www.goodoldgold.com/diamond/3292/ PRICE $2331

Diamond Details below from GOG


Shape: Round
Carat Weight: 0.625ct
Color: G
Clarity: VS2
AGS Cut Grade: Ideal
est GIA Cut Grade: Excellent
AGS Light Performance: Ideal
Optical Symmetry: Superior
Polish: Ideal
Symmetry: Ideal
Fluorescence: None
Girdle: 1.48%
Culet: None
Lab Report: AGS
Lab Report #: 8783606
In House: Yes
Width: 5.51mm
Length: 5.52mm
Depth: 3.40mm
Table Percentage: 55.44%
Depth Percentage: 61.61%
Crown Ú: 34.44‹
Crown Depth: 15.17%
Pavilion Ú: 41.02‹
Pavilion Depth: 43.30%
Upper Girdle Ú: 42.30‹
Lower Girdle Ú: 42.20‹

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________


Another Option from James Allen (I can''t recall if I have seen post of likes/dislikes from JA) PRICE $2160


http://www.jamesallen.com/diamonds/G-VS1-Ideal-Cut-Round-Diamond-1122718.asp?b=16&a=12&c=77&cid=131


Diamond DetailsItem Number: 1122718
Shape: Round
Carat weight: 0.62
Cut: Ideal
Color: G
Clarity: VS1
Certificate: AGS

Depth: 61.4%
Table: 56.0%
Polish: Ideal
Symmetry: Ideal
Girdle: TN-NED
Culet: None
Fluorescence: Neglible
Measurements: 5.47*5.51*3.37

Crown Angle: 34.4‹
Crown %: 15.10
pavilion Angle: 40.7‹
pavilion %: 42.80

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________


Another JA PRICE $2130


http://www.jamesallen.com/diamonds/F-SI2-Premium-Cut-Round-Diamond-860061.asp?b=16&a=12&c=77&cid=131
Diamond DetailsItem Number: 860061
Shape: Round
Carat weight: 0.70
Cut: Premium
Color: F
Clarity: SI2
Certificate: GIA

Depth: 62.8%
Table: 54.0%
Polish: Excellent
Symmetry: Very Good
Girdle: Very thin to thick
Culet: None
Fluorescence: None
Measurements: 5.66*5.68*3.56

Crown Angle: 34.5‹
Crown %: 15.50
pavilion Angle: 41.0‹
pavilion %: 43.50


 
Tara, as far as settings go, most jewelers carry samples in their case, and then they order the ring in your size and with the correct size head for the stone. So unless that jeweler does it that way, I would not buy that ring. Sizing a ring with diamonds in the setting like that can loosen little stones, and I would just be afriad the alterations might not be as satisfactory as having one made exactly to your specifications. I would insist on a new ring, so hopefully that is not a discontinued model.

As far as the diamonds go, I have bought a stone from God Old Gold and have 100% confidence in them. They have a lot more information on the stones on their site, so I would focus there and forget trying Craigslist. The trade-in policy at a jeweler like Good Old Gold is worth lot to me, just in case for a later anniversary or something you decide to trade for a larger stone. I think we can get you to a little larger stone,though, if you have up to $3300 for the stone. I''ll take a quick look. It is best to use the cut quality search when you look so you can put in Ex-Ex for cut and check only AGS and GIA for labs.

https://www.pricescope.com/sift.aspx
 
Thank you for taking the time to look at and suggest some stones. If a diamond is certified by GIA or AGS, do you still need to send it to someone like the RockDoc, Bill L. in Boca Raton?

I live in Coral Springs FL, so Boca is just up the street.

Thanks much!
 
Date: 1/1/2008 12:50:09 PM
Author: tara81662l
Thank you for taking the time to look at and suggest some stones. If a diamond is certified by GIA or AGS, do you still need to send it to someone like the RockDoc, Bill L. in Boca Raton?

I live in Coral Springs FL, so Boca is just up the street.

Thanks much!
Click to expand...
Sadly, Bill passed away last year
15.gif
so you would have to find a different appraiser.

And yes, I would still get a GIA or AGS stone independently appraised.
 
I have bought three stones from Good Old Gold and WhiteFlash, and I see no reason to have another appraisal. That is why you buy AGS or GIA graded stones...they have already been independently graded by a reputable lab! And prices are very transparent here due to the price searches.

Both of those vendors provide insurance valuation/appraisals with relatively inflated values that might be equal to what you''d pay for a branded stone from a B&M store, or you can use the actual purchase price to insure.
 
Thanks everyone. My next move is to check out a few B&M''s (I am picking up on the lingo...I think) just to try on some more settings just in case the one I spotted earlier cannot be ordered. That will help me feel more comfortable buying one on the internet. Normally, I buy everything on the net, but I am such a visual person, I can''t "picture" it on my finger unless I have seen something similar.

I will keep you posted.

Tara
 
If you''re not used to wearing jewelry and don''t want a lot of protrusion, I''m not liking the settings you''ve posted. Maybe consider these:

Vatche X-Prong

Whiteflash X-Prong Trellis

Blue Nile Trellis

Lots of designers have settings that are similar, and are often called trellis, x-prong, or truffle settings. These sit very low to your finger and are very comfortable to wear. You can thus do a solitaire in a setting that is comfortable and low-set. I''d put most of your budget into the diamond with a plainer setting, especially since you are not accustomed to wearing jewelry.
 
Congratulations on your engagement!!

I was kind of surprised to see the ring you liked as it doesn''t fit your description of yourself! It''s very detailed and feminine, not what I''d expect from a tomboy. It also sits up kind of high, I''d be afraid of hitting it often.

Here is one that I think fits your description nicely...

http://www.knoxjewelers.biz/index.htm?crn=200&rn=1312&action=show_detail

Good luck with your search.
 
Thanks Milton and Jayrenay for your posts.

My heavy tomboy days are a bit behind me by 25 years but I still feel like one at heart. These days the strongest hints of it mostly center around me rarely wearing dresses and my attempts to keep in shape which fall far short of the level of athlete I was in the past!
1.gif


I appreciate your posts because comfort and wearability were not things I had considered. I see I need to add another layer to my decision making. Our ceremony is in 6 weeks, so I don''t have too much time.

Today, my fiance and I are planning on going to a large B&M so I can try some more settings on. I will factor your great points into our search. I plan to buy the center stone through the help of this great site. It is possible I may buy a setting at a B&M since I am such a visual person and need to see and feel at least that part of it.

If anyone has any recommendation for a B&M store in the Ft. Lauderdale, Broward county area, please let me know.

As for the setting I chose, it is difficult to describe why I like it but I will try. I liken it to having a small 1/3 of an inch flat stick that you lie across your finger. I thought the "flatness" of it lying across my finger seemed less traditional and a bit less girly. Pehaps it is because of the baguettes that are square/rectangular in shape???

I am attaching a picture of 3 rings I liked at one of the B&Ms. All of them to me were similar in that the diamonds seemed to expand the length of my finger (going across). Maybe they will help to clarify my "style" as I don''t know how to describe it.

However, I also realize now that these rings may be exactly what you are concerned about in comfort too. If you have something flat across your finger, that means it has to be raised through the setting which can certainly impact the level of comfort.

The last thing that stands out to me (and keep in mind I have only been to two small B&M''s) is I do like some sparkle, not just in the main stone but with some stones on the setting.

I will take my camera with me today as a new shop may bring out some different styles. I will definitely keep in mind what you all have shared!

Thanks. I am looking forward to one day soon posting a pic of my final selection!

IMG_2439threerings.JPG
 
I live in the Ft. Lauderdale area.
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Try J.R. Dunn on Las Olas in downtown Fort Lauderdale. I believe they will access all the same diamonds for you online. I bought my Vatche setting from them.
 
have you thought about bezel set stones? something like this:

Full Bezel with princess cut.jpg
 
Thank you for your suggestions. I do like Tacori and Skippy sent me a nice setting earlier made by them/him/her. I will look to go to J.R. Dunn today.

The bezel setting is interesting. I will make sure I tell foks I never wear rings to factor that into the mix.

I am trying to clear things from plate, but these great posts keep adding a wealth of information for me to consider. I really do appreciate it. If I had a year to shop, I just may be dangerous with knowledge by the time it is all said and done!
2.gif


Something tells me today I will have a different perspective after I visit a nice store or two.

Tara
 
tara, there is another option for the ring....you can get the design of your choice custom made. A good jeweler is the key.

My family jeweler has had several rings made up for me over the years. From a sketch made by the benchman and me, to a wax model to the finished ring. I supplied some of the diamonds for the pieces, others I bought from my jeweler.

You would need to start now, tho, as it takes time to get this done.

Another suggestion that's been offered and one I would certainly recommend too, is the Vatche X prong mount. It sets low on the finger and is very smooth and comfortable. The Pearllman's suggestions are gorgeous too.....
 

It is time for an update. Do you hear the confidence growing in my post. It is amazing what a day can do and a visit to a nice jeweler to expand your horizons. Being a visual person, I at least need to see the mounting so I can "picture" it or others close to it. I also fctored your great suggestions into my options and discovered a few more likes and dislikes along the way.


So today I went to J.R. Dunn thanks to Tulip''s suggestion who lives nearby. Given that I had only been to a small jeweler, I felt like I was exposed to a different world....an expensive one, but a great one to know!


So, I narrowed my selections to two at JRD and have moved away from the original one I posted. Something tells me you will like these more. Now that I have some apples to oranges comparisons, it was easy to walk away from my first mounting posted. I think the two from JR show off the main stone more.

Also, one seemed to be in line with what I thought I would like. (post to follow) The other, a braided/twisted version continues to shock me that I liked it so much. I would have thought it was a bit too girly for me, but it looked really nice. I haven''t figure out how to post multiple pics, so I wll post the braided one in this post and the next.

I will then show you the other setting. Finally, I did like one from another stop on the way home. It was from Beverly Jewelers and was a platinum ring. My little camera gave up and I don''t have a single pic of that one.

A not so good) pic is attached

IMG_2441Aringbraided jrdunn.JPG
 
Here is the same braided/twised ring from a more side view

IMG_2441A ringJR dunn.JPG
 
Here is the second J.R. Dunn ring I liked. I thought it was a bit different to me and had a cool look to it.

IMG jrdunn overhead of floating dia ring.JPG
 
Seconed ring with a more side view

IMG jrdunn floating side view.JPG
 
Please disregard the middle ring. The rings on the ends are the rings posted above.

A few particulars.

Ring on the left is platinum. .32 ct for the setting. Range is $2090 to $1880 depending on discounts, if you buy your stone there, etc.

The braided/twisted ring is 18kt white gold. Another shocker on that one is the price is only $850 to $765. That would certainly allow me to focus more on the center stone.

JRD did pull one loose stone .81 ct, round. It was H/SI, GIA at $3117.

At Beverley''s (I plan to take a pic tomorrow and sleep on it one more night) the mounting is a platinum at $2400, few small rounds and baguettes.

The loose stone they pulled was a .7, round, G, VS1 GIA at 2800.

Finally, I know these rings don''t sit down as much as some of the ones you described. I love the idea of that but I haven''t liked them as much on my finger.

Thanks for looking and please keep the comments, ideas coming. Also, given these settings, do you still suggest I buy the loose stone first?

Tara

IMG jrdunn 3 rings.JPG
 
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