Has This Happened to You?

[minousbijoux]

Have you ever loved a stone, had it set, loved it, worn it proudly, then eventually fallen out of love with the setting? Before I buy a ring or have a stone set, I cannot stop thinking about it - which is the sign I truly love it. Then I get it, wear it, and the novelty wears off - I still like it very much, but I don't love it. Its gotten to the point that I collect stones, but don't have many set. I have an unbelievably beautiful sapphire that I have set in a fairly simple, platinum and pave setting (at the jewelers now getting the stone set). I love it and can't wait until it comes home, but I am worried that like almost everything else, it will lose its luster with me over time I have not had a piece custom made, and am starting to think its not worth it with me. It is a luxury to even have these stones and even more so to have them made into jewelry, and I recognize how self-indulgent it is to say "I get bored" with pieces. What do others do to prevent this from happening? Is that why so many buy inexpensive ebay settings? Any ideas would be appreciated.

TIA,

Minou

 

[T L]

I actually fell out of love with an expensive setting I bought in the early 90's for my pear spessartite. I did buy an inexpensive ebay setting, and now I love it again. The stone was actually clashing with the old setting. It doesn't have to be a custom piece, each individual is different on what they want in a setting.

 

[iLander]

It's called the law of diminishing returns (at least that's what I call it); the first time you have a fabulous cake, it's fabulous. But the tenth time, it's not so great. People can get used to the most beautiful things, and they stop seeing them, stop appreciating them (that's why you should never pay for a house with a pricey view- you'll stop seeing it). Same reason that people living next to train tracks eventually stop hearing the train.

Or, you could be over-anticipating; maybe your vision exceeds what ever it could actually become.

Or, I call it "making your own sandwich". You ever notice how when someone makes a sandwich for you, it tastes better than when you make it yourself? There is a lot of "making your own sandwich", in this process of buying a stone and having it set. It's very different than buying a ready-made (someone else's sandwich) ring.

I'm full of theories Or just full of it . . .

 

[marymm]

For me, a significant component of gemstone collecting and jewelry-making is that "thrill of the hunt" - finding that gemstone that somehow already belongs to me even though I haven't purchased it yet, or coming across just the right setting or discovering a new-to-me but oh so simpatico jewelry designer. I find that while I don't get bored with older pieces per se, I do sort of move on to the next gemstone or the next ring project - I still wear the other jewelry pieces but now they're in the rotation and not the "new" "best" thing. But I don't set all my gemstones either - just the ones I have to wear - so each of them gets a turn as the special new treasure.

What I've experienced is a sort of negative recall of a couple of rings I have - some very nice rings - for whatever reason, when I think of these particular rings I think the settings aren't as they should be, not as complementary to the gemstone or not that special -- but when I actually pull them out of the jewelry box, I think "wow, this is really pretty, there's nothing at all wrong with this setting." So I give myself a mental kick in the pants when those negative thoughts come to mind, and tell myself the rings are lovely and to just wear them, darn it. And I do.

 

[minousbijoux]

Thank you for your responses, TL and ILander. For a while there I could hear crickets...started thinking I was the only one that had ever encountered this...

ILander, I think its exactly like your theory, particularly the diminishing returns. I think the answer is to stick to buying sandwiches instead of mountings ...and think of all the money I'd save

 

[minousbijoux]

What I've experienced is a sort of negative recall of a couple of rings I have - some very nice rings - for whatever reason, when I think of these particular rings I think the settings aren't as they should be, not as complementary to the gemstone or not that special -- but when I actually pull them out of the jewelry box, I think "wow, this is really pretty, there's nothing at all wrong with this setting." So I give myself a mental kick in the pants when those negative thoughts come to mind, and tell myself the rings are lovely and to just wear them, darn it. And I do.

Okay, this. I have to admit, now that you describe it, there is one particular culprit that is causing my angst. I kick myself as I completely overpaid for the ring. Its kind of big and clunky and I bought it when I knew very little about sapphires. So because I overpaid for it, I can't even think of scrapping it. Makes no sense, I know. I should take the darn thing, melt it down and reuse the gold. Either that, or get over it and wear it!

 

[ForteKitty]

Yes, this has happened to me w/ a beautiful diamond ring.. the setting was custom. But i never wear it now because I "see" it in another setting.

Because of this, i haven't set my 4.75 namibian garnet. To be honest, I dont think I will ever set it. It's in a display case w/ some other collectibles and I look at it every day, so it's still being appreciated/loved!

 

[FrekeChild]

I don't love Big Blue's setting anymore.

In fact I want to remove the stone and reset it with something else...

 

[Agnesg]

Well said, iLander!

 

[Lovinggems]

I think if all the CSers participate in a jewelry swap we may never need to buy another coloured stone or semi mount.

 

[Indylady]

Yes.

Sometimes, its just a matter of putting it away and then re-uniting with it after a while.

But other times, you've a) learned new things b) found a more perfect setting c) etc. and then, well baww.

What funny is that I've been really in the mood for an interesting piece. You know, cool, neat, out of the ordinary, makes you look twice? But, I'm scared to actually come up with a design because I'm worried I'll fall out of love with it faster--my style typically leans towards classic styles, and I'm scared of designing an 'out there' piece because I'm worried it will get outdated or I'll feel silly wearing it after a while.

 

[ooo~Shiney!]

This is a very interesting thread!!!!
I have a few stones set, and so far I love to wear them,
but I think it's crazy that I *almost* prefer gazing at my little boxes of unset gems more?

 

[MakingTheGrade]

Actually, I"m in the process of my first reset. But to be fair, I was disappointed with it from the start

All my other rings and settings I still love. I alternate my RHR fairly frequently so I don't get too bored of them. And I appreciate them all over again when I put it off after a long break.

 

[GliderPoss]

OMG me toooooooooooo!!!!!!!!! I am such a shocker for this. I go on PS daily and see someone else devine (insert ring here) and it's like all I can think of for the next few weeks and I search everywhere for a cheap version for myself with visions of my "version" of it on my hand then I'll see something totally different and fall in love all over again!

No wonder I only have one actual custom setting completed and half a dozen gem boxes waiting to be set....

 

[Arkteia]

I am new and my collection is small so actually I buy stones to set them. But it is expensive and I may not like the net result. Or never wear the ring. I noticed that I have started combining stones of different colors rather than mounting in diamonds. I think it is more interesting and you do not get tired of contrast colors so soon.