FI nervous about picture

[sumbride]

My FI has never liked having his picture taken. I know this, I understand this, but somehow, I was still surprised when he told me last night that he''s nervous about our engagement pictures in a couple of weeks. He especially freaked out when I told him that our photographer would probably want to take a few pictures of us kissing. This really upset him. I asked him why but he says he''s nervous about how he''ll look in the picture... he freezes up sometimes and gets this weird expression on his face. Consequently I have very few good pictures of him... and most of them were taken after he''d had at least 2 drinks, or was just very relaxed, i.e. vacation.

I''ve booked a really good, experienced photographer and I''m hopeful he''ll know what to do with him. He''s more documentary style so he''ll probably just take lots of candids rather than many posed pics, but if M knows he might be snapped at any second, he''s probably going to be on edge.

Has anybody else been through this type of situation? Do you have any tips to calm him down, other than getting him drunk before the shoot, so that we''ll get our $''s worth? When he told me about the kissing thing, I said "they''ll probably take pictures of us kissing at the CEREMONY too, you know..." and he said "is it too late to elope?" Yup, yup it is.

 

[decodelighted]

Hee! Yes! Decoshub is a photo-avoider. Pre-Deco he''d freeze up & look like a serial killer in most shots & still would if left to his own natural reactions

. Too bad HE doesn''t drink or I would have LIBERALLY used that technique & urge you do the same.

My arsenal:

Tickling
Whispering funny things to him
Grabbing his butt
Distraction
Grab his shirt coller & kiss him

Basically I just try to keep him loose & having fun. Take away the "seriousness" ... We''ve had MUCH MORE PIX SUCCESS when he''s, say, SMILING! Laughing!

Also would have a frank talk with the photog ahead of time so they''re prepped to shoot a ton of every "shot"/pose. If they know it''s a nervous blinker or the like ... they shoot more takes etc.

Will say that having a few cute engagement pix under our belt (albeit just a couple weeks before the ceremony) made ME a lot less nervous about wedding day shots. All the more reason to DO IT!!

 

[poptart]

My DH is the same way. He hates having his picture taken and looking at photographs of himself. I second what deco said about ways to loosen him up. During our engagment pics I tried to keep him focused on me by starting up a funny conversation, and consequently he did not worry about the photographer and we got some awesome pictures. And definitely talk to the photographer about his photo phobia!

Marisa

 

[KimberlyH]

My DH hates having his picture taken as well. So I had him help me select our wedding photographer so that we found someone he was comfortable with. He prefered a female and so we narrowed our search down using that criteria and found the most amazing woman. In our wedding photos there are several pictures of him looking tense (he recieved , no joke and no exageration, 17 phone calls in 20 minutes as he was driving to the ceremony site to meet me and the photographer, as you can imagine he was a bit stressed out). But the more pics she took the more relaxed he became. I turned it his picture taking hatred into a joke and whispered silly things to him to relax him a bit and it worked out well. Good luck!

 

[sumbride]

Excellent suggestions ladies! Thanks! If I can just get him to forget the guy is there, we''d get good pictures so I''ll do my best to save up some funny stories for that day, 2 weeks from today! I''m always grabbing his butt when I walk by him in the house, so that will definitely be a way to get his attention on ME and not the photographer. Distraction is the name of the game!

I''m definitely thinking of this as the trial run for the wedding day... It will give us a chance to get to know the photographer, whom we hired without meeting first based on recommendations and email. While I''m sure my guy will have a few sips of something before the ceremony, I don''t want him to feel like he has to be wasted, nor do I want to feel that he will be!

I emailed the photographer to advise him of it and ask if he has any reassuring words. I''m sure he''s seen it before, but I want M to be as comfortable as possible with the shoot and happy with the results!

 

[ChargerGrrl]

Oh my- DH gets that "deer in the headlights" look in many photos. I use a lot of the suggestions Deco listed, and just try to get him to focus on me, and not the photog.

I applaud you for doing an engagement shoot. It will certainly help him prepare for the big day. I so wanted to do one, but we ran out of time. Rest assured though that your FI will have a totally different mindset on your wedding day. He''s be on cloud 9, and probably won''t even notice that he''s having his pic taken!

 

[Rosebud8506]

For our engagement session, our photographer actually suggested that we bring a bottle of wine and wine glasses and actually shot us on the beach "being ourselves", or a more photo -journalistic approach, if you will. The wine actually loosened my DH up and after awhile he got the hang of it. The shots turned out amazing!

 

[sumbride]

Oh, Rosebud... I like that idea!!! Especially since we got engaged at a winery! That would be really sweet! I''ll ask the photographer if that would be cool. I don''t know where the shoot will be yet, have to make sure public imbibing is ok.

 

[Rosebud8506]

Date: 10/26/2006 2:57:18 PM
Author: sumbride
Oh, Rosebud... I like that idea!!! Especially since we got engaged at a winery! That would be really sweet! I''ll ask the photographer if that would be cool. I don''t know where the shoot will be yet, have to make sure public imbibing is ok.

Oh then that would be perfect!! You should totally do it!! Its nice to have "props" in the photos, haha!

 

[sumbride]

The photographer doesn''t seem worried about calming him down, but he did say he doesn''t have our session on his books! Umm.....

hopefully he can put us back on there as previously scheduled! We planned a special trip for it...