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Experience going from bad to worse. Please help.

Discussion in 'RockyTalky' started by magnoliasmom, Aug 8, 2017.

  1. magnoliasmom
    Rough_Rock

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    by magnoliasmom » Aug 8, 2017
    Hello -- appreciate any help/feedback you can give.

    9 years ago, my husband had a custom solitaire made for me, with a 1.19 AGS round ideal. I also own some H&A diamond studs that I never wear. They are .33 and .34 carats each.

    So I had the idea that I'd have a custom three stone ring made, using the white gold from my original setting. We took it to the jeweler who made my original engagement ring, two weeks ago. In the process, we discovered that my wedding band (plain 18K wg 2 mm band) is too tight and needs to go up half a size.

    I had some specific ideas as to what I wanted - a six prong head with three prong sides, plain, thin band, swoopy and graceful - the jeweler didn't like the idea of three prong sides and pushed for four. The jeweler finally agreed to make it with three prong sides but insisted on a few modifications. I agreed because I felt somewhat intimidated. We agreed on a price and a timeline (about a month for the three stone ring, a week to resize my band) and left the jeweler with my stones and original setting.

    A few days later, I received a CAD via email. It looks very little like what we discussed. I replied, with several modifications, and heard nothing for 6 days. I emailed the jeweler again, who responded this time, and asked me to come in to discuss. In the meantime, I sent the jeweler another photo of a different setting, since getting the one I originally wanted seems to be problematic.

    Saw the jeweler this past weekend. Jeweler did not remember me and has not resized my wedding band (this is two weeks in, I was promised a week). Told me I've already incurred over two hundred and fifty dollars of CAD fees (one CAD) and I have to stop changing my mind. I told the jeweler I changed my mind because getting my original idea and point across clearly is not working, and perhaps the new setting I suggested (with photos) would be easier to understand.

    Three days later, still no CAD. No apology for the delay in getting the wedding band resized, either.

    My husband wants to eat the CAD fee (even though it looks very little like what we discussed) and pull the project. He suggested forgetting the custom route, and just getting a new stock setting. I found the Whiteflash Butterflies setting online and have been in communication with them (they have been wonderfully responsive.)

    What would you do? Would you give the jeweler the chance to produce a second CAD? Are there other six prong centre/three prong sides/plain band settings to which you could direct us? Thank you in advance.
     
  2. Karl_K
    Ideal_Rock
    Trade

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    by Karl_K » Aug 8, 2017
    my opinion is when things start to go sideways don't throw good money after bad.
     
  3. Austina
    Brilliant_Rock

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    by Austina » Aug 8, 2017
    It doesn't sound like they're listening to what you want, rather trying to get you to have what they can do. They've already failed to deliver on the simpler task of resizing your ring.

    Pay for the CAD, get your ring and stones back and spend the money on getting what you want, otherwise you won't be happy. Right off the CAD money to experience and go elsewhere.
     
  4. foxinsox
    Brilliant_Rock

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    by foxinsox » Aug 8, 2017
    I'd retrieve both rings, eat the CAD cost and go to someone who does want to hear your ideas and give you what you're paying for.
     
    Matthews1127, tlfiore, Tekate and 5 others like this.
  5. Crazie4Cuts
    Shiny_Rock

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    by Crazie4Cuts » Aug 8, 2017
    Definitely get your diamonds back (make sure they are yours!) I think you already know the jeweler is not hearing you and what you want. I'm suspecting they are unable to deliver what you have in mind, so don't push. Just pay for the CAD and try to end on a good note. Don't even get your ring resized there! Listen to Karl K, Austina, and I! Good advice here. Perhaps you can check with the PS recommended vendors to help you get the ring of your dreams! You should not have to wrestle with your Jeweler.
     
  6. Asscherhalo_lover
    Ideal_Rock

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    by Asscherhalo_lover » Aug 8, 2017
    I would get my diamonds back, pay whatever, and post a nice lengthy review on yelp and anywhere else to warn others. Ugh.
     
  7. soxfan
    Ideal_Rock

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    by soxfan » Aug 8, 2017
    Yep. Use a PS vendor to make your ring. Vendor sounds awful:(
     
  8. MissGotRocks
    Ideal_Rock

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    by MissGotRocks » Aug 8, 2017
    I definitely wouldn't invest any more money in this job with that jeweler. I think he doesn't know how to do what you want anyway.
     
  9. LLJsmom
    Ideal_Rock

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    6,450
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    Oct 24, 2012
    by LLJsmom » Aug 8, 2017
    Like everyone else said, no sense throwing good money away after bad. The CAD is a sunk cost. Move on with a vendor in which you have confidence.
     
    Matthews1127 likes this.
  10. VRBeauty
    Ideal_Rock

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    by VRBeauty » Aug 9, 2017
    I agree with all of the above - pull the plug on this project and find a jeweler who has demonstrated an ability to execute a project like this successfully.

    BTW, I share the jeweler's concern about securing the side stones with only three prongs. It's one thing to use a three prong setting for an earring or pendant - pieces that are relatively safe from stress and accidental hits. It's quite another to secure stones in a ring you'll probably wear every day with only three prongs.
     
    Matthews1127 likes this.
  11. lovedogs
    Ideal_Rock

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    by lovedogs » Aug 9, 2017
    agree with all the others. Pull the plug and run away from this vendor. Get your rings/diamond back, and then go elsewhere! Also definitely post a review (yelp, google, or similar) to warn others.
     
    Matthews1127 likes this.
  12. arkieb1
    Ideal_Rock

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    by arkieb1 » Aug 9, 2017
    Either make some sort of agreement to split the cost of the CADs so you pay half for their time and get your rings back, if they will not give them back unless you pay for all the CADs then I guess if you have to you should. Under no circumstances would I get anything made from them.
     
    Matthews1127 likes this.
  13. Karl_K
    Ideal_Rock
    Trade

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    by Karl_K » Aug 9, 2017
    using 3 prongs does take some design considerations.
    The 3rd prong should be wider than the other 2 and the seat much wider.
    If the stones sit out from the ring then 3 prongs are a bad idea.
    That said making your clients feel intimidated is never good or acceptable.
    Explain in a calm and professional manner and if your not comfortable with the design pass on making it would be the right thing to do.
    A successful custom project demands good communication for it to be a good experience and make everyone happy.
     
    Last edited: Aug 9, 2017
    mochiko42, Matthews1127 and FeFeV like this.
  14. acaw2015
    Brilliant_Rock

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    by acaw2015 » Aug 9, 2017
    I agree with what has already been said but also want to add that if the communication is this bad from the get go, imagine how it will/would be if you werent happy with the final outcome and wanted some changes... I have gone through several jewelers and have realised that if they arent consumer friendly at first, they wont become consumer friendly later either. :wavey:
     
  15. magnoliasmom
    Rough_Rock

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    Aug 8, 2017
    by magnoliasmom » Aug 9, 2017
    Thanks, everyone. I have emailed the jeweler.

    Just for reference, I have only received one CAD in the past two and a half weeks. I am offering to cover the cost of one CAD.

    I really like the Whiteflash Butterflies setting, however, with the exchange (we are in Canada) and shipping, it's going to cost me $2K. I will try to find something local.

    Thanks again.
     
  16. Karl_K
    Ideal_Rock
    Trade

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    by Karl_K » Aug 9, 2017
    When im interviewing jewelers/bench some questions:
    1: Do they do the custom work in house?
    2: procedures, costs and payment schedules
    3: show them your inspiration pictures and ask them if they have made something similar.
    4: ask if they have pictures of past work.
    5: ask if they have any samples in store of their custom work.

    It is not always a deal breaker for me if they don't do it in house.
    For example the guy I have do my personal setting does custom work for several jewelers and his custom work rocks.
    There is an extra layer of communication there so a good question is how many custom projects have they done with the outside bench.

    What you are looking for is a picture of their attitude and communication as well as answers to your questions.
    Not having a clearly defined process and explaining it well for working on custom projects is a huge red flag.
     
  17. diamondseeker2006
    Super_Ideal_Rock

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    by diamondseeker2006 » Aug 10, 2017
    Great points by Karl. Truthfully, I'd never do a custom ring with a local jeweler in the large city near me. It is ALWAYS best to buy a ring from a maker that has made the design you want before and in the quality you expect. If it is a new design, then it is even more important to access a talented designer and CAD artist. Be glad you're only losing $250, because had the ring been completed, I have a feeking you'd still be starting over!

    I love your idea of making a three stone ring!
     
  18. pearaffair
    Brilliant_Rock

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    by pearaffair » Aug 11, 2017
    Yep. It's a sunk cost. Run away!
     
    Matthews1127 likes this.
  19. SimoneDi
    Brilliant_Rock

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    by SimoneDi » Aug 11, 2017
    Please take your diamonds and find another jeweler, we can provide some recommendations. What is your budget?

    Also, I actually don't think that you should pay for a CAD that you didn't even like and such that did not portray what you expected. A PS approved jeweler send me multiple CADs once, no stings attached. At the time, I had to put the project on hold, but I was extremely impressed with the service and will definitely be back when I am ready to pull the trigger.

    Your jeweler doesn't seem competent enough and it does not seem that he respected your opinion.
     
    Matthews1127 likes this.
  20. magnoliasmom
    Rough_Rock

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    by magnoliasmom » Sep 7, 2017
    Hi everyone,

    I really appreciate all your advice, and I wanted to post an update.

    We pulled the project from the original jeweler. Here's the punchline...the original jeweler LOST my wedding ring. The ring was there to be resized and cannot be found. It belonged to my husband's grandmother, it was from Birks in Montreal in the 1930s. A simple, 18k white gold, 2 mm band. Very thin and dainty. It's gone.

    My husband has no family left, save his brother, and he was quite upset. After his grandmother died, his mother wore that band on a chain around her neck. When she was dying of cancer, she took it off before she entered the hospital for the final time, and gave it to my husband. She said, "maybe you'll find a girl who will wear this someday." My husband was only 22 and in grad school, so he put it away for safekeeping.

    Years later, when we'd been dating for awhile, he showed me the jewelry that his mother and father had left to him and his brother. I immediately gravitated to the simple, classic Birks band, and tried it on my ring finger. At the time, it fit perfectly. I'm a quarter size bigger now (blame age and childbearing) so that's why it was in with my engagement ring and stud diamonds, to be resized. And...it's gone.

    The jeweler, by way of compensation, made me another band. And it's wrong. I know, surprise surprise...anyway, it is too wide and too thick. So I've ordered a new band, a 1.5 mm 18k white gold band, very low. Interestingly, my former wedding band, despite its age, never needed to be replated, and maintained its lustre, without any tinge of yellow. My original engagement ring did indeed need replating about 1x per year.

    Anyway...we pulled the project and I found a stock setting that I love. Except, I could not find anyone (we're in Canada) who carried this setting. So we ended up working with a jeweler across the border in the US. He was fantastic and I love my new ring. He also made a cross out of my old engagement ring setting, for my daughter's first Holy Communion next year.

    I will post some pictures of the new ring, once I figure out how to do so. Thanks again for all of your advice.
     
  21. Austina
    Brilliant_Rock

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    by Austina » Sep 7, 2017
    Oh nooooo, I'm so sorry about your wedding ring, how devastating for you both. :(

    I'm glad you've found a new setting for for ER, and look forward to seeing photos.
     
    Matthews1127 likes this.
  22. magnoliasmom
    Rough_Rock

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    by magnoliasmom » Sep 7, 2017
    The centre stone is an F colour, 1.19 AGS ideal, the two others are .32 and .34, AGS ideal, colour G. Setting is 18K white gold from Unique Settings of New York. Cross is made from my original engagement ring shank. Thank you for looking.
     
    Matthews1127 likes this.
  23. magnoliasmom
    Rough_Rock

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    by magnoliasmom » Sep 7, 2017
    Sigh. The pictures didn't post. Will try again.
     
    Matthews1127 likes this.
  24. magnoliasmom
    Rough_Rock

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  25. magnoliasmom
    Rough_Rock

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  26. magnoliasmom
    Rough_Rock

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  27. magnoliasmom
    Rough_Rock

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  28. magnoliasmom
    Rough_Rock

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  29. farrahlyn
    Brilliant_Rock

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    by farrahlyn » Sep 7, 2017
    i am SO sorry to hear they lost your band!!! Especially with such sentiment attached to it :(( Glad you just pulled the plug with him. Because wow, your new ring is STUNNING!!!! :love: Please share who the jeweler is!
     
    Matthews1127 likes this.
  30. Diamond_Hawk
    Brilliant_Rock
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    by Diamond_Hawk » Sep 7, 2017
    Fantastic Advice!
     
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