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Engagement presents?

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firebirdgold

Ideal_Rock
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So what''s the deal with getting your new fi an engagement present? I hadn''t heard about it before LIW. Are there any guidelines? And when did this start?
Let''s see... He gives me a diamond ring and I give him a robot or the new nintendo revolution? (if it comes out this summer).
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anchor31

Ideal_Rock
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Oct 18, 2005
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It''s by no means necessary; for me it was an idea I had on my own. I just thought I shouldn''t be the only one giving/receiving an expensive gift, and thought I would show my appreciation buy giving him something too. Originally, I intended on giving him a watch, but he got out of school and started working February last year and he really needed a more elegant watch than the battered plastic Timex he had, so I gave him a nice watch last summer as an anniversary/birthday/Christmas gift (I''m a student and it covered my budget for the three occasions by itself!!!).

A little before Christmas, he started talking about that XBOX 360 that came out and said he wanted to buy one this year. Since I already knew he was going to propose this year, I decided that I would buy the console for him as an engagement present. I knew he''d be thrilled with it, not to mention it probably increased the budget for my ring significantly, because now it''s something he doesn''t have to pay for himself...
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With all the accessories and guizmos he wants with it, plus one game, it''ll cost me close to 850$, tax included. Who said I have expensive taste?
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He knows I''m going to buy it to him, and he''s very excited. Sometimes I wonder if he''s even more excited about getting his XBOX than I am about getting my engagement ring!
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It''s a very personal thing, and I don''t think there are any guidelines. If you want to give him a present, just give him something he really wants.
 

ilovesparkles

Ideal_Rock
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Feb 13, 2006
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Thats funny to hear about anchor31 my BF would die and go to heaven if I got him that.

Wren, I had never heard about it before coming to PS either. It was someone (can''t remember who) lamenting over the fact that she wanted to get him a watch and he wanted a bass. I thought what????? I suppose you could get him something, but I have no idea what. A watch would be silly cause my BF has a few very nice ones already. But an XBOX< that would be golden if I got him that. LOL.
 

E B

Ideal_Rock
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Aug 31, 2005
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9,490
I got my FI an engagement present too...an XBOX 360 (as Anchor has planned). He loves it. He''s 23 years old and still loves video games as much as he did when he was 10. Oh well.
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It''s not at all required (or even expected), but he threw down quite a bit for my e-ring, and I thought it''d be nice to give him a sort of "thank you" gift.
 

firebirdgold

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what is it with game platforms?
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I know my guy would love the nintendo version of the xbox 360... if the dratted thing actually comes out this summer. *grrr*.
I think it''s a nice idea.
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Although you can''t exactly inscribe a gamecube.
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Too bad my bf doesn''t wear watches.
 

anchor31

Ideal_Rock
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Date: 3/21/2006 12:54:19 AM
Author: EBree
I got my FI an engagement present too...an XBOX 360 (as Anchor has planned). He loves it. He''s 23 years old and still loves video games as much as he did when he was 10. Oh well.
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It''s not at all required (or even expected), but he threw down quite a bit for my e-ring, and I thought it''d be nice to give him a sort of ''thank you'' gift.
Hehe, this idea is quite popular!! Princessv got her guy an XBOX 360 too... My boyfriend is 24 and he''s still a gaming addict! I suppose we all have our addictions, right?
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ljmorgan

Brilliant_Rock
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Taken from an etiquette page:

"There is no requirement that the bride-to-be choose an engagement gift for her fiancé, although many engaged women give a personal, long-lasting present to their future husband. Popular gift choices include a watch engraved with the date or a special message, or a leather portfolio stamped with his initials."
 

ilovesparkles

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OMG so it was only two days ago my BF found out I was on a forum to look at rings but I couldn''t hold out on telling him about this XBOX 360 engagement gift fad that seems to be developing. I think I frightened him a little but when I said never mind I thought you would be excited he played it off, made a goofy face and claimed he was internally excited and I just couldn''t tell.
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Yeah right, nice cover. I don''t think I really bothered him, I just thought he would take it better. Oh well. Obviously I think I am jumping the gun here.

Anyone else bring it up with their BF casually or seriously?
 

Honeyfly

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Mar 19, 2006
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I have heard this before from my boyfriend, he thinks he is entitled to a motorbike!! I told him it didn''t work that way, he gets me
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lol
 

Mannequin

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I have been thinking about this question too. I definitely want to get my guy something because I just love giving presents to anyone, and especially him.

My sweetie is finishing law school, and now he says he wants to get engaged soon (before July!
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). I had thought that for him, a nice engagement present might be taking him out suit shopping for some quality menswear he can use when getting dressed for work in a law office. I went suit shopping with him before and helped him select a stellar three piece pinstriped Ralph Lauren for interviewing, and he loves my taste.

He's not much of a jewelry wearer, but a gold rope chain might also be nice for him. I have already given him an engraved watch on the occasion of our first anniversary/his MSU graduation from undergrad, a nice Citizen with "I LOVE YOU 5-18-03" on the back. I could always upgrade him to a nicer watch, too, I guess.

Any suggestions on this, ladies? It seems I may have to decide earlier on this than I thought!
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I am working on a first year teacher's salary, but I have a bit saved up for a rainy day.
 

firebirdgold

Ideal_Rock
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HEE! I just discovered another great reason to give an engagement present!!
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I'd been trying to think of a present that would get him either outside or let him exercise his creative side that's been pretty neglected what with the ph.d deadline. Since he doesn't have the time for a photograph workshop, I thought I'd get him a new camera. He takes beautiful photos.

Bf was saying that he was thinking of using his tax refund to buy a digital camera. I have got to figure out a way to prevent every thought that wafts through my head to also show on my face, because I must have gotten a funny look. He's like 'what?', and wouldn't let me squirm out of answering.
So I had to cough up that I had been thinking of buying him a new camera for his engagement present. He got this odd look on his face and started muttering something about how he should just go ahead and buy it. It took me a minute, but it dawned on my that he was talking about the RING!! WHee!
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akw94

Brilliant_Rock
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So I had to cough up that I had been thinking of buying him a new camera for his engagement present. He got this odd look on his face and started muttering something about how he should just go ahead and buy it. It took me a minute, but it dawned on my that he was talking about the RING!! WHee!
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Wren, that''s pretty exciting! After reading this thread and reading other comments about this topic, I brought it up to my bf, asking if he''d ever heard of it. He said no, which of course, I hadn''t either before coming to PS. He said he didn''t get it b/c how could the woman ever know when to buy that sort of gift. He said that I would never know when he''s going to propose b/c he''d never give off hints or anything. Yuck!
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I told him that he really didn''t have to be like that and I am open to any hints he might like to give, but I don''t think he was paying much attention to my comments. I also said that women have a general idea of a timeframe, but I think he also thought that was weird. I was telling him that some men actually say when they''re going to propose or actually give a month; it''s really not that odd! Anyway, so if I get him something, I have no idea WHEN or WHAT! He''s not into games, and i''m not sure there''s a big anything that he''d like. I''d also want to get something sentimental, that is life-lasting.
I really don''t understand why some men need to be so secretive. Of course, he says that he''s never met anyone who doesn''t like surprises. Hah! I told him to come to this site!! What a funny conversation we had, but I always enjoy talking about proposals and stuff. I admitted how addicted I was to PS, and I think he found that slightly funny...and of course, could now be reading everything i''m typing.
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Caribou

Brilliant_Rock
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I didn''t get my FI an engagment gift, he would have been annoyed. We also aren''t doing gift to each other on our wedding day. It''s a waste...well actually, I suppose I sort of am....he came home one day telling me about his friends 52" flat screen TV and asked ''would you be annoyed if I spend $1500 (or whatever it was) on that right now?''
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Since we had just got engaged and thought we were going to have to pay for the entire wedding I said ''H.E.doubletoothpicks YES!!!!!!'' So then I told him, if he can wait, he can use whatever money we get from our wedding and buy it. Am such a good fiance.
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Now he''s more excited about the wedding because he''s getting the TV. I guess I''ll take that.
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firebirdgold

Ideal_Rock
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Well, I hope my bf doesn''t mind an engagement present. That was a rather odd look.
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But I do want to give him something. I know a digital camera isn''t going to last as long as an e-ring, but it''s pretty much the only thing I can think of. I want the present to be not just something he wants, but something that will be good for him! The engraved watch idea is a great one ... if your guy wears watches.
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He also let slip recently that the ring fund is a little higher than I thought it was! *Happy Dance*.
 

rainbowtrout

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2,105
I am supposed to be either giving my DB 300 towards the ring or I will get him a present in that price range :)
 

leeenie

Shiny_Rock
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Mar 27, 2005
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281
Date: 3/22/2006 7:13:33 AM
Author: equestrienne
I have been thinking about this question too. I definitely want to get my guy something because I just love giving presents to anyone, and especially him.

My sweetie is finishing law school, and now he says he wants to get engaged soon (before July!
30.gif
). I had thought that for him, a nice engagement present might be taking him out suit shopping for some quality menswear he can use when getting dressed for work in a law office. I went suit shopping with him before and helped him select a stellar three piece pinstriped Ralph Lauren for interviewing, and he loves my taste.
I am in a similar situation as your bf (need to revamp work wardrobe!) and I think a nice suit is a thoughtful and practical gift. Honestly I don''t think most guys attach sentimental meaning to pieces of jewelry like watches, as girls do, and something that he''ll use/wear often that he actually needs would probably be appreciated! Plus a nice suit can last a pretty long time - probably longer than the lifespan of a tech gadget.
 

midgirl

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Feb 20, 2006
Messages
111
in my group of people everyone of course gets the guy a gift. sometimes a very nice watch, sometimes a collection of great dvds, a new flat screen tv-whatever he would like. To me it only makes sense and I never thought of not doing it. But maybe it depends on your social group or area where you live.
 

Blenheim

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Feb 27, 2006
Messages
3,136
In my group of people, one talked about it and didn''t follow through. No one else mentioned it. I''ve thought about things that my BF might like, but he already has a nice watch, his cufflinks have a lot of sentimental value, etc. I''m wondering if it might be better just to keep it in savings for now. We have so many things coming up that we''ll need/want to spend money on (moving costs, furniture, a puppy...)

I think that I once mentioned it to my BF, and he thought that traditionally, the money that the man spends on the engagement ring kind of balances out with the woman''s family paying for the wedding. Of course, this was probably when women weren''t financially independent. Also, I''m guessing that most weddings today cost a lot more than the engagement ring, so "balances out" isn''t entirely accurate.

I think that it''s a lovely idea though.
 

TravelingGal

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Dec 29, 2004
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17,193
I am getting my boyfriend a very nice set of golf clubs and a new golf bag. I am doing it not because of any etiquette, but because I want to! I want him to enjoy a lovely present for our engagement just as I will enjoy the engagement ring.

I''m not overly sentimental and never expected a ring. I just consider this a nice exchange of gifts to show each other how much we appreciate one another.
 
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