Dress stress

[larussel03]

Has this happened to anyone--I bought my dress a couple months ago (supposed to come in next month) and it''s a Maggie Sottero Olympia. When in the store, I kept putting it back on and ended up buying it my first day shopping. I tried on so many different styles of gown and on that day I was confident with my purchase.

Now, a couple months later, I''m worrying that I may have picked the wrong dress. I worry that it''s too plain and that I won''t look "beautiful" on my wedding day. I see how beautiful all the brides look on this board in their dresses, and I get nervous.

I''m hoping that when I see it again I''ll be happy with it, and that these are just stupid I havnet seen the dress in a couple month jitters.

This happen to anyone else??? Is it just me being dumb and overreacting???

 

[anchor31]

Well, if it makes you feel better, I LOVE the Maggie Olympia, and I really want to try it on on my next shopping trip. It is plainer than a lot of dresses we see, but it's so elegant and unique! Try to remember how you felt as you wore it...

Also, nothing stops you from "dressing it up" with accessories. For example, no matter what dress I'll have, I want to wear long gloves with it. Will you be wearing a veil? You can play with that too. I'll be wearing my mother's cathedral veil with blusher, and if my dress is a simpler one, I'll probably add a mantilla lace edge to it.

Remember that this is your wedding and your dress, don't compare yourself with other people. If you love it, it's the only thing that counts.

ETA: Do you have pics of yourself in the dress? I'd love to see them!

 

[Blenheim]

I also picked my dress on the first day I went shopping, and I''ve also had some twinges of regret looking at all of the choices. I just keep reminding myself of the reasons I loved it in the first place, and it seems to be doing the trick.

I also haven''t seen mine since I ordered it, but it''s waiting in the bridal shop for the next time I''m in VA. It felt perfect on (and it wasn''t even the right size!), so I''m really looking forward to trying it on again.

Second, you are GORGEOUS and there is NO WAY that you would not look beautiful on your wedding day. And I think that simpler is often better, because the dress is adorning you and not the other way around. (I''m not sure if that makes sense.) If you''re still worried, you can always play around with accessories.

I love your dress, btw. Very elegant.

 

[larussel03]

Thanks anchor and blenheim--I feel a little bit better. A big part of why I picked the dress was because my wedding wasn''t for over a year and I wanted to make sure it wasn''t anything that would go "out" of style and I wanted a dress that wouldn''t become dated looking in pictures. Although now I notice all the beautiful embroidered dresses and all that stuff and get a little bit of dress envy.

I really hope that when I see it in my actual size I love it again b/c that day I really didn''t want to take it off, but I get nervous that maybe it wont be perfectc.

 

[E B]

Date: 11/8/2006 9:34:28 PM
Author:*~Sweetpea~*

I worry that it''s too plain and that I won''t look ''beautiful'' on my wedding day. I see how beautiful all the brides look on this board in their dresses, and I get nervous.

Your dress is simple and classic, and it''ll highlight YOUR beauty even more. I notice that a lot of brides choose these dramatic dresses and the dress ends up wearing them. You want to be the standout beauty! I think you absolutely made the right choice.

 

[Trelala]

Hey there Sweetpea! No, you are not alone in second guessing your choice of gown. I did that too. I swore I wouldn''t get a strapless dtess and what do you know? When I went to try on gowns with my mom, we both ended up liking the strapless. In fact, purchased it on the spot. Later I was in a panic thinking, "oh my god, what did I do?! I got the wrong dress!" But my friend comforted me by pointing out that I did try on a whole bunch of dresses and picked this one from those.

I''m sure once you have your hair and makeup on, everything will come together.

 

[Tybee]

You''re not alone.
I LOVED my dress... knew it was the one when I saw it in a magazine, LOVED it when I tried on a similar dress (I never got to try on my dress... ordered it sight unseen! Crazy, right?) Then I freaked out for a couple of months! I kept trying to find pictures of real
people in MY dress and never could. You have to wait so long for your dress to come that your bound to second guess.
When my dress finally arrived I was in love again.
The waiting is really hard.

 

[robbie3982]

I don''t know that it has anything to do with the waiting since I''ve been second guessing my choice lately and I already have the dress. Like Trelala, my dress isn''t what I thought I wanted. It''s an A-line and I was sure I wanted a ball gown. I just have to keep looking at pics of myself in my dress and in other dresses that were the style I thought I wanted and then I remember why I picked my gown.

 

[labbielove]

This HAS happened (is happening) to me a bit also,

I bought my dress and do love it, can''t wait for it to come in, etc.

(Maggie bride too- the Grace Kelly!)

I think it''s natural to second guess sometimes, so don''t worry.

What happened to me was, a friend took photos of me in the dress and when I saw them I felt like I looked so- well, "not as good as i thought i looked when i looked in the mirror!" . I freaked- then she pointed out that she was at a weird angle (we had to sneak the photo) plus the dress sample was a size larger than I need. Plus I am a bit self conscious after seeing all the beautiful brides in gowns everywhere, etc.

I will be 39 when I marry for the first time next fall, so I have to keep in mind that I''m not 25 or even 30 anymore, and I''ll be a beautiful bride in my own right!

Hang in there

 

[Jaders731]

Ok.. I''m jumping on the second guessing bandwagon...

I picked my dress on my second day of shopping, but only my third store overall. And I had the whole "moment" when I put it on... its Beautiful.. I love love love it...

but I keep looking at the model pictures.. and I hate how it looks on her... I have two cell phone pictures of me in the dress and its beautiful.. but I second guess how the bottom looks (its a modified A-line). The cell phone pics do not show the bottom.. just the dramatic neckline which I adore...

but everytime I go back to the model pics.. ick... It makes me wonder... maybe the dress just doesnt fit her right.. not sure what it is.

I know when I go back to try it on (Next weekend!!!) I''m going to love it.. I guess what I have to do is just NOT look at the model pics anymore..

I totally get what you are feeling.. but dont worry... I''m sure your dress is beautiful.. and that it was meant for you... Those "moments" happen for a reason.. and you shouldnt second guess what your gut feeling was the day you fell in love with it!!!

 

[Jas12]

Oh sweetpea, I feel for you. I haven''t decided on my dress yet, and I am already second guessing (i am actually trying to decide b/w a maggie and a melissa sweet--it''s price vs style for me and I flip-flop on an hourly basis!

When i was asking PS''s about choosing a dress, someone mentioned how we all have different parts of our personalities that could be reflected in a dress. For ex, soft and feminine, assertive and confident, etc. My trouble has been deciding what part of ''me'' i want to portray in my dress. I like really clean lines and simple sheath dresses, but i also love utlra-feminine dresses with lace embellishments and organza--since our moods change each day, it is natural to feel differently about your dress on any given day, and question if you chose the right one. I am also starting to realize that it is OK to look at other people''s dresses and love them too--when we go shopping at our favourite shop, we don''t ususally just see one single nice item of clothing, we choose based on what attracts us that day and where we need to wear it.

I think the more simple dress is a great choice, it won''t look dated in photos, you can do a lot with accessories and as others have mentioned, you are the star!

 

[Scintillating]

Found a pic of an actual person wearing MS''s Olympia, it''s very classic - very pretty!

I think you''ll feel better once you have it, and have gone for fittings.
It''s SO easy to second guess your decisions - but I think it''s a pretty classic elegant dress.


Scintillating...

 

[larussel03]

Date: 11/9/2006 11:22:30 AM
Author: Jas12
Oh sweetpea, I feel for you. I haven''t decided on my dress yet, and I am already second guessing (i am actually trying to decide b/w a maggie and a melissa sweet--it''s price vs style for me and I flip-flop on an hourly basis!

When i was asking PS''s about choosing a dress, someone mentioned how we all have different parts of our personalities that could be reflected in a dress. For ex, soft and feminine, assertive and confident, etc. My trouble has been deciding what part of ''me'' i want to portray in my dress. I like really clean lines and simple sheath dresses, but i also love utlra-feminine dresses with lace embellishments and organza--since our moods change each day, it is natural to feel differently about your dress on any given day, and question if you chose the right one. I am also starting to realize that it is OK to look at other people''s dresses and love them too--when we go shopping at our favourite shop, we don''t ususally just see one single nice item of clothing, we choose based on what attracts us that day and where we need to wear it.

I think the more simple dress is a great choice, it won''t look dated in photos, you can do a lot with accessories and as others have mentioned, you are the star!

First of all--thank you everyone for responding!!!

Jas12--That''s my worry too, that it does not reflect my personality. I mean, I tend to be drawn to things that are trendier or edgier or something like that, like colorful thin scarves, sparkly sweaters, high boots and I just feel like the dress is soooo plain now.

Although that is also the main reason I picked it because I worried that if I picked something really different, I''d not like it again and I wanted it to look ''wedding dressy'' not like a dress that could be worn elsewhere, and one that I knew people wouldnt be like "what is that???" haha.

And I wanted a coreset back, and those were basically my only guidelines.

Anyways, I''m sure it''ll be great and it''s just that I hate being "locked in" to things, esp since I havnet seen it, so I should prob stop freaking. Especially since there''s no point bc I doubt you can return them and I"m not wasting $750!!!

I was trying to find it on "normal" girls as well, and could not, so thank you, Scintillating, for posting that! I dont like how she''s lifting up the fold over thing though, that bugs me haha.

 

[Katiemarie]

I think that dress is lovely

Maybe go to the store and try it on again just so you can see all over again why you love it!!

Also, i like what another poster said about accessories especially as you mentioned you are drawn to unique things. There is lots of opportunity for some dramatic/different jewelry with that dress becuase it wouldn''t end up being too busy like when busy dresses are paired with busy jewelry.

 

[Tybee]

another thought... if you find that you don''t love it, you wouldn''t be the first bride to change her mind! That''s why there are so
many ''unworn'' wedding dresses for sale.
I know that several PSers here bought a first dress, and then traded in for a different dress.
You certainly want to LOVE your dress.

 

[Tybee]

Here''s another bride in Olympia.. from theknot.com

 

[larussel03]

Date: 11/9/2006 5:35:46 PM
Author: Tybee
Here''s another bride in Olympia.. from theknot.com

YAY, thank you for posting another pic--seeing real people in them makes me feel better!!! I tried to search the knot but couldnt find any!

 

[larussel03]

Thanks Tybee and Katiemarie!

I think that I''d stress like this over any dress, it''s just how I am, but it''s good to know that I''m not the only one who feels this way and to see real people in their dresses! It''s funny b/c my mom picked the dress, so I kind of want to stick with it b/c of that (it makes her feel good) and I do like it, but I think I dont have that "I love my weddnig dress" gene in me and I''d feel this way about any dress I got. I hate committment when it comes to things I buy for some reason haha. Plus when one of my bridesmaids saw it she said "OMG that''s so you" so maybe I''m tunnel visioning myself or something.

I feel a ton better today though! Thank you all so much! I''m still fighting the urge to look at others...I dont want to end up wanting another one!

 

[anchor31]

Date: 11/9/2006 6:06:06 PM
Author: *~Sweetpea~*

Date: 11/9/2006 5:35:46 PM
Author: Tybee
Here''s another bride in Olympia.. from theknot.com

YAY, thank you for posting another pic--seeing real people in them makes me feel better!!! I tried to search the knot but couldnt find any!

Have you looked at the maggie brides section at maggiesottero.com? there''re a few Olympia brides... It''s gorgeous!

 

[Jas12]

sweetpea, you sound so much like me....i have been putting off making the big purchase for all the same reasons you have mentioned--i hate being ''locked'' into a choice, will stress no matter what, and ( a big issue I am struggling with) want to please my mother as well.

(My mom LUVS the maggie sottero Melinda....i like it, but don''t LUV it. The dress I like is 3X as much, so natually she thinks i would be crazy to go for the expensive one. It causes a lot of angst for me b/c i want to love my dress, but i don''t want to overspend and then on top of that not please my mom)

I know this is not the practical solution, but if you are really, reallt doubtful I would go try it one more time, give it a couple days of thought then if you still feel the same way, consider switching dresses. The day is about you, so you have to feel excited to wear your gown.

 

[larussel03]

Date: 11/10/2006 3:01:17 PM
Author: Jas12
sweetpea, you sound so much like me....i have been putting off making the big purchase for all the same reasons you have mentioned--i hate being 'locked' into a choice, will stress no matter what, and ( a big issue I am struggling with) want to please my mother as well.

(My mom LUVS the maggie sottero Melinda....i like it, but don't LUV it. The dress I like is 3X as much, so natually she thinks i would be crazy to go for the expensive one. It causes a lot of angst for me b/c i want to love my dress, but i don't want to overspend and then on top of that not please my mom)

I know this is not the practical solution, but if you are really, reallt doubtful I would go try it one more time, give it a couple days of thought then if you still feel the same way, consider switching dresses. The day is about you, so you have to feel excited to wear your gown.

I think I'm going to just wait for it to come in for my fitting b/c I'm sure I'll be happy once I see it again. I mean I was happy enough to committ then, I just like so many different dresses taht I think no matter which I got I'd be like "hm, maybe I should have gotten that one..."

ETA: Plus, Jas, the Melinda that you posted is what started me in this frenzy!!! I like that dress sooooooooooooo much but it's so different from what I chose, that I started wishing I'd checked into that one...I may suggest it to my MOH, who is getting married near when I do (date's not set yet) so at least someone I know will wear it!!!

 

[larussel03]

Thanks Anchor for suggesting the maggie site--these pics made me feel so much better

 

[larussel03]

I still kinda wish I'd gotten a lacier or more blingy gown though!!! Alright, I'm spinning now so I'm going to end thinking about the dang dress!!

grrrr

 

[E B]

Date: 11/10/2006 6:08:40 PM
Author: *~Sweetpea~*
I still kinda wish I'd gotten a lacier or more blingy gown though!!! Alright, I'm spinning now so I'm going to end thinking about the dang dress!!


grrrr

No, no, see...a less blingy gown gives you more opportunity to bling up the shoes, hair, bouquet, and most importantly...the bling!

 

[budgetbride]

i like the dress if it makes any difference

 

[larussel03]

Date: 11/10/2006 8:17:47 PM
Author: EBree

Date: 11/10/2006 6:08:40 PM
Author: *~Sweetpea~*
I still kinda wish I''d gotten a lacier or more blingy gown though!!! Alright, I''m spinning now so I''m going to end thinking about the dang dress!!


grrrr

No, no, see...a less blingy gown gives you more opportunity to bling up the shoes, hair, bouquet, and most importantly...the bling!

haha, true true! I have no idea what I''m going to wear for jewelry though!

 

[larussel03]

Date: 11/10/2006 11:42:03 PM
Author: budgetbride
i like the dress if it makes any difference

Thanks budgetbride!!

 

[Jas12]

sweetpea--i am sorry, i didn''t mean to start you on this frenzy--i know how it feels, so i didn''t mean to cause you undue stress!
I think you are SO right, no matter what you pick, you will always question it just a little b/c it''s a natural thing to do for us indecisive brides--I am coming to terms with this, but i think that on our wedding days, with all the excitement, special touches etc. we will be excited to wear whatever we ended up choosing.

(kinda funny how one girl''s advice searching, leads to another girls advice searching--i am beggining to think PS is more harm than good

 

[larussel03]

Date: 11/11/2006 11:50:12 PM
Author: Jas12
sweetpea--i am sorry, i didn't mean to start you on this frenzy--i know how it feels, so i didn't mean to cause you undue stress!
I think you are SO right, no matter what you pick, you will always question it just a little b/c it's a natural thing to do for us indecisive brides--I am coming to terms with this, but i think that on our wedding days, with all the excitement, special touches etc. we will be excited to wear whatever we ended up choosing.

(kinda funny how one girl's advice searching, leads to another girls advice searching--i am beggining to think PS is more harm than good

haha, it wasn't you that caused the stress, I didn't want to make you feel bad! I was just joking that I really liked that dress you'd posted and I was like "dang I want that one"

I feel tons better now, I think I went through a little indecisive period, plus the dress really is not the most important detail to worry about in the grand scheme of things, I just got stuck on it for a few days.

No one at my wedding will think about the dress as much as I am doing now, which is what kind of brought me down from my momentary craziness...no matter which dress I'd choosen it'll look great b/c it's a wedding dress and I'm the BRIDE haha.