Divorced ladies....

[reader]

What did you end up doing with your diamonds?

 

[Trekkie]

He asked me to return it. This request was symptomatic of his general all-sound stinginess. About a year ago I sold my wedding bands as scrap gold. No point in hanging on to them.

 

[diva rose]

Would it be taken as the same as a broken engagment?
The etiquette for broken engagment is:
If the woman is responsible ~ she returns it. If not, she keeps it.

 

[Circe]

Would it be taken as the same as a broken engagment?
The etiquette for broken engagment is:
If the woman is responsible ~ she returns it. If not, she keeps it.

Nope - quite the opposite, actually. So Trekkie's ex was completely out of line.

 

[Nashville]

Would it be taken as the same as a broken engagment?
The etiquette for broken engagment is:
If the woman is responsible ~ she returns it. If not, she keeps it.

Nope. An engagement ring is given as a promise of marriage. If that promise falls through, the ring is returned. If a couple makes it to marriage but the marriage doesn't work, then the rings are considered a "gift" and the woman would have every right to keep them and do with them what she wished.

 

[yennyfire]

Agree with Nashville entirely....

 

[LadyBlue]

Should not the ring being considered as a mutual asset?

 

[tyty333]

Mine is sitting in my jewelry box. Its an ulgy stone (I'm sure he overpaid). Dont feel like resetting it because
I feel like it would be throwing good money after bad. I will give it to our son (when the time is right) but its
such an ulgy stone that I really wouldnt want him giving it to his future wife.

 

[Circe]

Should not the ring being considered as a mutual asset?

Not legally, no - though money becomes joint after marriage, engagement rings are purchased out of one person's funds pre-union and given to the other as a conditional gift, pursuant upon the marriage taking place.

Reader, I haven't been in this exact same situation, but I have a sack full of jewelry from exes. The less sentimental stuff, I would up gifting to friends over the years when it seemed appropriate. The more sentimental stuff ...? Well, it sort of never stopped being memory-laden, and I never wear it. One of these days, I'll sell it on eBay, or something.

That said, none of it is worth much in the financial sense. Given that you only recoup something like 30% on diamonds ... I don't know if that would be worth it to you. Perhaps you could take it around to some local jewelers and see if they'd be willing to take it in trade?

Alternately, I know a lot of women reset their diamonds into pendants, or the like. I tried doing that with one piece, and, again ... never wear it because there are too many weird associations. But I am a sentimental sap. If you're more rational, and there's some design out there you love, perhaps that might be an option?

 

[Strawdermangrl]

after a long fight over money and whatnot, I got to keep all my family money going in and I let him have the diamond. Good for me, the diamond was a crappy EGL that was something like an 1.50 E I1 and he paid upwards of 11K for it and couldn't get more than $1500 for it. So what did he do? He gave it to his new wife. HAHAHAHAHAH. Sucker.

 

[vespergirl]

I sold my old ering to help finance a move to a new city, but I kept my old wedding band (I wouldn't have gotten much for it). I don't wear it, it just sits in the back of my jewelry box.

 

[vintagelover229]

I was really lucky when it came to the re-sale of my diamond. I had just received my 1.31 J SI1 AVC about a month before he filed for divorce. I held onto it and considered re-setting it but when I met my boyfriend now, I knew I could never hold onto it forever. So, I emailed Jonathan at GOG to consider down grading it and getting some funds back and getting something smaller and around the same time someone else was looking for an AVC with those specs. Jonathan gave them my email and allowed me to do a private sale. They offered me only 300.00 less than what I paid for the stone. It was a deal that I couldn't pass up....so I sold her
I wasn't really all that unhappy about selling her because it was time to move on and let go. However my wedding band I paid only 500.00 for on a diamond re-sale site, and my fingers are so small that it's just not worth re-selling it. I'll wear it with a RHR later on down the road I think because it doesn't match my new e-ring. But perhaps I'll sell it later on down the road too beucase it'll probably just sit in the back of my box.

 

[that_someone_special]

after a long fight over money and whatnot, I got to keep all my family money going in and I let him have the diamond. Good for me, the diamond was a crappy EGL that was something like an 1.50 E I1 and he paid upwards of 11K for it and couldn't get more than $1500 for it. So what did he do? He gave it to his new wife. HAHAHAHAHAH. Sucker.

WOW. Tacky!!!! Good thing he is gone!!

 

[Strawdermangrl]

after a long fight over money and whatnot, I got to keep all my family money going in and I let him have the diamond. Good for me, the diamond was a crappy EGL that was something like an 1.50 E I1 and he paid upwards of 11K for it and couldn't get more than $1500 for it. So what did he do? He gave it to his new wife. HAHAHAHAHAH. Sucker.

WOW. Tacky!!!! Good thing he is gone!!

yeah, it was horrible. I felt really bad for her!! We have a few mutual friends and on FB they commented on the ring when they got engaged. I looked at it and was like "OMG. That's unreal" LOL. Poor girl. I hope she never finds PS, that might be the fight of their marriage!

 

[monarch64]

I kept the rings and sold the e-ring on ebay and actually got a very fair price for it. The wedding band is still in the back of my jewelry box...if the right buyer came along I would sell it, otherwise it will be passed down to a family member someday to do with whatever they wish.

 

[Anonymous]

I was saving it for my girls to use for whatever they wanted it for - pendant, etc. Unfortunately, it was stolen during our move. At least it wasn't a nice ring...far from it actually.

 

[Amber St. Clare]

Well, when I was married to my first husband we had a robbery and my diamond {uninsured--it was 1975} was stolen. And my ex hadn't even bought it, it was from my grandmother and we re- set it}. My wedding ring from him was sold to help facilitate my move to NJ with my then fiance, current husband. It had absolutely NO sentimental value to me.