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DAR Members?

Discussion in 'Hangout' started by FlashyFlamingo, Aug 20, 2019.

  1. FlashyFlamingo
    Shiny_Rock

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    by FlashyFlamingo » Aug 20, 2019
    I figured this might be a good forum to ask... any DAR members? If so, what are your thoughts? I’ve been a Junior Leaguer for a few years and am looking for another women’s group with good volunteer opportunities. The DAR chapter in my area does a lot with literacy and fundraising for underprivileged children. I know that there is a definite stereotype of a bunch of snobby, older ladies who get together and gossip, but I’d love to hear your experiences.
    Also: I know that I can prove my lineage to the revolutionary war, so I know membership shouldn’t be an issue.
     
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  2. distracts
    Ideal_Rock

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    by distracts » Aug 20, 2019
    I know I qualify because my cousin is in it using the shared side of the family, but I haven’t joined. It makes me think of Gilmore Girls.
     
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  3. bludiva
    Brilliant_Rock

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    by bludiva » Aug 20, 2019
    I may offend people but will say it anyway ...the stereotype I've always heard of this group is more "genteel racism" than "snobby/gosspy"
     
  4. distracts
    Ideal_Rock

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    by distracts » Aug 20, 2019
    Yeppp
     
    


    


  5. smitcompton
    Ideal_Rock

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    by smitcompton » Aug 20, 2019
    Hi,

    My ex husbands father goes way way back. My ex sister-in-law belongs and she and her family are not racist. They live in New Jersey. I would check it out myself and see if you and the group fit.
    It would interesting t hear you impressions.

    Annette
     
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  6. FlashyFlamingo
    Shiny_Rock

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    by FlashyFlamingo » Aug 20, 2019
    I think of Gilmore Girls too which is why I'm not sure about joining. Might be a bit stuffy for me.
     
  7. OdetteOdile
    Rough_Rock

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    by OdetteOdile » Aug 20, 2019
    Are any of your Junior League friends also in DAR and can give you their impression of it? Do you feel like the Junior League is not providing you with the volunteer activities that you are specifically seeking? Do you have a YMCA or community center in your area that might provide some volunteer opportunities you would like?

    I have a friend who is in DAR. Unless I am getting it mixed up with a different genealogy group that she is in (she's in more than one), I think what she loves about it is going to conventions and wearing a ball gown with gloves. She loves history, so perhaps there is a history aspect about it that appeals to her as well. I have not heard her talk about the volunteer work aspect of it.
     
  8. FlashyFlamingo
    Shiny_Rock

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    by FlashyFlamingo » Aug 20, 2019
    I keep thinking of the Golden Girls episode where Blanche is trying to join the Daughters of the Old South and finds out she's a yankee.
     
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  9. VRBeauty
    Super_Ideal_Rock

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    by VRBeauty » Aug 20, 2019
    A few other options:I have friends who belong to Rotary, Soroptimists, and P.E.O. Sisterhood.
     
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  10. liaerfbv
    Brilliant_Rock

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    by liaerfbv » Aug 21, 2019
    I grew up in the south, and agree with the racist observations. The DAR volunteerism I observed exclusively benefited "the right kind" of white people, FWIW. Maybe your local chapter would be different, but I'd be hesitant to associate with the group in general, given the connotations.

    My mom was in Junior League and also Rotary, and members were constantly asking her to join other volunteer groups. I think you could probably ask around your JL chapter for some recommendations.
     
    


    


  11. AGBF
    Super_Ideal_Rock

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    by AGBF » Aug 23, 2019
    My question is: why do it? Why join something that other people cannot join simply because they do not have your élite history? It excludes people.
     
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  12. MollyMalone
    Ideal_Rock

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    by MollyMalone » Aug 23, 2019
    I think that paints with too broad a brush -- and I say this as someone whose paternal great-grandmother resigned from the DAR after Marian Anderson was not permitted to perform in the DAR's Constitution Hall in DC. But that was 80 years ago. (BTW Susan B. Anthony was a member of the DAR as were a number of other influential suffragettes). Today, the current president of NY's statewide DAR is a black woman who is also on the national organization's Board of Directors; think at least 1/3 of a DAR chapter here in NYC are descendants of African-American Revolutionary War soldiers, etc.

    The couple of chapters in my hometown in the Midwest that I'm aware of are focused on teaching English as second language; tutoring would-be citizens for for the naturalization test; offering financial and sweat equity support to some historic preservations sites; and fostering literacy& literature appreciation among women inmates at the prison where a friend of mine is a chaplain; she's been impressed by the DAR members she's met by virtue of her position.

    As with most any organization, think there are bound to be local groups/chapters where you'd be aggravated or rolling your eyeballs, with yet still others where'd you feel quite at home.

    So I'll ditto @smitcompton 's suggestion that you check out the local DAR (there may be more than one chapter that's convenient to you), as you would with, say, the local Rotary, to see if any of them are good fit.

    Here's hoping you soon find a volunteer niche that's right for you! :))
     
  13. moneymeister
    Brilliant_Rock

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    by moneymeister » Aug 24, 2019
    I have a stack of paperwork here for a couple of ancestry clubs. I am not interested in perpetuating racism, and I hardly quality as elite. I have the most wonderful letters from my ancestors that are family treasures. They talk about wars, and being hungry. They were poor - very poor. The letters are barely literate sometimes. They died young and tragically and the life was more heartbreaking than much else. As I have about 2500 folks in my family tree on ancestry, so far I have found that they were just farmers. Not slave owners. Many Quakers. Many soldiers for the north. Two men died in Richmond's Libby Prison. I have a quilt that was made before 1840 by my ancestors. My grandmother's baby doll from 1911 I just had restored. These things mean the world to me. Not to show any sort of wealth or prestige. I have a more (maybe romantic) notion that our lives are best understood in multi-generational context. As we invent ourselves and figure out our best lives, we should not forget those people before us. I'll share a little excerpt of a family letter from just an every day man.

    If I look back and find racism, I promise it will be with a heavy heart and disgust. I wondered about the DAR and racial exclusion, but from what I can gather, that is not the case. If I ever get this paperwork off and join a couple of these societies and find they are racist orders, I will resign.
    Back to the letters. The spelling was left as written.

    Rouperroux France

    Feb 15th 1919


    Dear Brother,

    Will write you a few lines. Today I just got a letter returned I wrote you at Evanston. I wrote on the 24th of Sept. and it just came back. I supose you have gotten letters from me by now at your present address if you had of kept on forwarding your mail you would have gotten several letters from me. I have written about 2 letters a month to you.

    No I am not in the kitchen any more. I got out of the kitchen the 25th of Sept. And we taken our first trial at the Germans on the 26th of Sept. Was up for 9 days living on corned beef and hardtack we never had a blanket or nothing for shelter just get what little sleep we could in a hole it was raining about all the time so it was very disagreable with what men taken sick and what the Germans got our company was pretty small when we came out.

    We came out from the front and marched at night for 7 or 8 days and our Company was filled up with other men and we were shipped to Belgium. We were there only a few days until we went in again and we met a few Germans large shells that reduced our Company again down to just a few men so we didn’t stay up long. We came out and got some more men to fill up again and was on the front line when the war stopped.

    I was made a Corporal on the first of Oct. for capturing 4 Germans and 3 machine guns. I came through the whole of it with out a scratch but just the same I am glad it is over. I got to see a battle in every place and way except on the water. Also got to see a submarine but it was English. Saw lots of air battles and seen lots of planes come down but I don’t want to see any more fighting if I have to be in it.

    Before I went in the gas worried me more than anything but after I was in a few days I soon got acquainted with gass and gass shells and that didn’t bother me but I never got used to the big shells they could stay back 10 to 30 miles and shoot them over. You could always hear them coming and tell what ones were coming close but you didn’t have any time to decide what to do and when they hit they could tear a hole you could hide a house in.

    When a big shell hit in a bunch of men in hard ground and caught them standing up there wasn’t many left. When they wasn’t shooting the big shells at us the Dutch would fly over in the airplanes and shoot at us with machine guns and of a night they would come over with the big boming planes and drop boms on us and the planes always carried big ones.

    ...

    I'll end here, but I don't want my ancestors forgotten, nor do I want to slink to a corner and forget all they did to build today's world.
     
  14. LightBright
    Brilliant_Rock

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    by LightBright » Aug 24, 2019
    Moneymeister your ancestor’s letters are remarkable. They tell the story of people who didn’t hesitate to act on behalf of others. I hope you will transcribe them and share them with a historical museum like the Smithsonian. Thank you for sharing with us.
     
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  15. moneymeister
    Brilliant_Rock

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    by moneymeister » Aug 24, 2019
    Thank you for listening. I can totally see where someone could look at it and think it's an elitist org, but at least for me, my heart is in it for the history.

    I have been working on the letters for a long time. I am so thankful my grandmother saved all of the letters from my great grandmother. They start in the early teens and follow family up until the 1950's. I have them about 1/2 scanned. The handwriting is in cursive and I realize my kid's generation needs a transcription. When I get them finished, I will go into Ancestry.com an upload them to the family members.
     
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