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Bridal Shower?

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ladypirate

Ideal_Rock
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Jul 30, 2007
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I am totally clueless about the bridal shower but my sisters and BMs have asked about it, so I thought I''d post on here.

We live in Portland as do my sisters and one of the maids of honor (yes, I have two). The other maid of honor is in Seattle, so within easy driving distance. I also have two other close girlfriends who live here in town. One other female friend lives about a 2 hour drive. Other than that, everyone (family, friends, etc.) lives at least a 10 hour drive or a plane flight from us. How many people are supposed to come to a shower? Is it pointless to have one if only a few people can come? Do we still invite people from all over? Do I talk to my mom about doing one down in California where she is?

I just feel really awkward about the whole thing. Both of our parents did a courthouse/very small wedding so they are even more clueless than we are. I''m the first one of my close friends to get married, so no one really knows what to do. Up to now, that has been fine as I just have done everything myself, but I can''t do that for this. It also seems really weird to basically be asking people to buy us stuff. I love going to showers, but it seems very "me" focused to have one myself, even though it sounds like a lot of fun.

It''s just getting to the point where the idea of a shower is depressing. I''d love to have the experience, but with everyone scattered so far away I just don''t see it happening. A couples shower is also out because most of FI''s close friends and family live about 10 hours away.

Sorry this was so scattered--I''m just a bit out of sorts over the whole thing.
 

marlie

Brilliant_Rock
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Jun 30, 2009
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hi lp!
i guess my first thought after reading this was that it''s entirely possible that your friends/family may already have something in the works and are trying to surprise you. i know you said that they don''t know the drill since you are first, but i''m sure they are thinking about it and how to approach it. that''s my gut feeling.

i don''t think there are any specific rules regarding how many people should be invited (but everyone who''s invited should also be invited to the wedding obviously). typically you don''t throw your own ''shower'' b/c i guess it is like asking for gifts. but, if nobody is planning an official shower, could you just pick a weekend that works for everyone and do a ladies lunch with your fave girls? no gifts, just a day spent with the ladies celebrating your engagement and upcoming marriage. or is there a place in the middle where you can meet and do a ladies weekend, lunch, brunch, dinner, bachelorette stuff etc.?
 

sunnyd

Ideal_Rock
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Nov 5, 2007
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A shower can have as many or few people as you want, I''d say. You don''t even have to have gifts, if you don''t want them. If your BMs want to treat more like a get together with food and games, that sounds like fun to me!
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Would your moms (yours and K''s) be able to fly up for it? Maybe you could plan it for a weekend with something else wedding related like a fitting? Trying to brainstorm...
 

Lauren8211

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Apr 25, 2008
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11,073
I''m sorry LP! I wish this was coming together more easily for you.

I don''t think there is an attendance number requirement for a shower. However, if the gathering is going to be smaller to the point that you dont think a full-fledged shower is appropriate, definitely look into what Marlie was suggesting. Perhaps just a lunch out with the girls, and you can open gifts! From the sounds of it, you''ll still have like 6-8 women, right? That''s plenty, IMO!

You don''t have to follow the traditional rules if you dont want to! Get creative and have fun with it.
 

winelover23

Ideal_Rock
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Jul 28, 2009
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2,630
Oh LP don''t worry your precious head. Think non-traditional. There is no required number of people and it doesn''t have to be a traditional shower. If it were me I''d rather get together w/ the few that are local for a girls day of shopping/lunch/etc. I''ll come down!
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ladypirate

Ideal_Rock
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Jul 30, 2007
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Thanks for the reassurance ladies. I don''t know why I freaked out--I think the wedding stress is starting to get to me!

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