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Are these too big in my tiny earlobes?

Alex T

Ideal_Rock
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Oct 24, 2012
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This is a very serious question & I'm not fishing for compliments.

The diamond studs I only ever remove for cleaning are .35 each, a gift from my parents for my 25th. Mr T bought me a .40 solitaire pendant from Tiffany's just after we met, so again, only removed for cleaning & I'm super sentimental about them.

For my 40th Bday, Mr T surprised me with new studs (.50 each) & a pendant (.75ct) as we have more money now. What a treat, I hear you cry, especially as we ALL know Mr T is tighter than a camels arse in a sandstorm!! Well I think I have worn the new set less than 10 times & I turned 46 a couple of weeks ago. Shameful, right? I have always felt they looked massive on me, but they might only feel massive because I'm so used to smaller ones & have small earlobes. But Mr T has insinuated more than once perhaps they were a waste of money? And I'm NOT an ungrateful person at all, so I thought I'd put them on today. I know your gals wear significantly bigger & look gorgeous, but I don't & I feel weird. Pendant is passable as I have wide shoulders, so I have worn that more for fancy parties, studs feel like boulders. Thoughts & opinions? Happy to take less crap pics if necessary, but wanted to show scale.
 

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RosieR

Brilliant_Rock
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593
The stud size you are wearing in the picture are in proportion to your ear lobes and are of good ratio with your pendant. So you are not doubling up on very similar jewellery pieces maybe repurpose the smaller pair?
 

Austina

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Perfect size @Alex T, what are they, just over 5mm? I think they’re great.
 

bling_dream19

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Really beautiful on you @Alex T just like you. I actually showed my hubby and he agreed def not too big. And he tends to lean to the smaller option if there is a choice. I think you're in the adjusting period and soon you'll be like these are perfect!!! And the necklace is smashing!
 

Catmom

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I don't think they look big at all. I think they are just the perfect size.
 

Alex T

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@Mekp @Luce @OdetteOdile @lovedogs @RosieR @Ally66 @eh613c @Austina @bling_dream19 @Catmom

Thanks ladies. I knew you girls would give me an honest opinion, for better or for worse. The studs feel heavy, whereas my usual ones I can't feel at all & sleep in really comfortably, whereas I fell asleep in these the day of my 40th & woke feeling stabbed. I fumbled around somewhat tipsy at 2am to get them out! Yes, they are a smidge over 5mm so not big, but bigger than my others.

Mr T came home just now & noticed them immediately. It obviously means a lot to him to see me sparkling them for no reason.

Steady on @dk168 !!! Might take me another 15 years to be ready to go up a notch!!
 

lissyflo

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Add me to the pile of people who think they look lovely and not too large at all.

But if you feel comfier in the smaller versions, could you repurpose the earrings as side stones somehow? Feels like sacrilege to even suggest that of a Tiffany pair though!
 

mrs-b

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Honestly? I think you're being silly. A 1/2ct stone is 5mm. Nothing that's 5mm is huge. "Boulder"? Oh please. It's tiny. Most people won't notice it. And, frankly, the diff. between .35 and .5ct is about .7 of a mm - which is...well...it's .7 of a mm. In the general scheme of things, it's nothing.

There's nothing wrong with your eyesight and you're an intelligent woman. So you KNOW 5mm is a tiny measurement compared to anyone's body. So something else is at play here. Whatever that thing is, get over it and start enjoying these lovely gifts; I'd be with your husband on this re regretting buying them for you. And if you think he's tight now, wait till this silliness goes on for a couple more years and he decides there's no point buying you nice gifts.

I know this sounds harsh - and I truly apologize for that aspect of this post. But seriously, someone who loves you spent a BUNCH of money buying you something really special - and you've left it in a box. What does that SAY? I'd be so hurt! And these size comparisons are just nutty.

Were they mine (and of course they aren't), I'd be attaching the original diamonds to the new ones and making a double stud - one of my all time favorite earring designs - so you can wear both. And then I'd do the same with the pendant. But if you can't get from .35 to .5ct in a stud, I'm sure this would be out of the question for you. It would be very pretty, tho, and would allow you to wear all your diamonds, and the sentimentality would be off the chain.

ETA If the posts of the new earrings are too long for you, get them shortened. It's an easy process, and inexpensive.

ETA x 2 My apologies if my comments were too blunt, Alex! Everyone knows you're one of the nicest women on PriceScope, and deserve to enjoy your sparklies! ox

Adriana Orsini - Sake.jpeg
 
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Alex T

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And urgh, I need a turkey neck lift! :-o I thought I was aging quite well until I saw this!
 

Alex T

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Honestly? I think you're being silly. A 1/2ct stone is 5mm. Nothing that's 5mm is huge. "Boulder"? Oh please. It's tiny. Most people won't notice it. And, frankly, the diff. between .35 and .5ct is about .7 of a mm - which is...well...it's .7 of a mm. In the general scheme of things, it's nothing.

There's nothing wrong with your eyesight and you're an intelligent woman. So you KNOW 5mm is a tiny measurement compared to anyone's body. So something else is at play here. Whatever that thing is, get over it and start enjoying these lovely gifts; I'd be with your husband on this re regretting buying them for you. And if you think he's tight now, wait till this silliness goes on for a couple more years and he decides there's no point buying you nice gifts.

I know this sounds harsh - and I truly apologize for that aspect of this post. But seriously, someone who loves you spent a BUNCH of money buying you something really special - and you've left it in a box. What does that SAY? I'd be so hurt! And these size comparisons are just nutty.

Were they mine (and of course they aren't), I'd be attaching the original diamonds to the new ones and making a double stud - one of my all time favorite earring designs - so you can wear both. And then I'd do the same with the pendant. But if you can't get from .35 to .5ct in stud, I'm sure this would be out of the question for you. It would be very pretty, tho, and would allow you to wear all your diamonds, and the sentimentality would be off the chain.

Adriana Orsini - Sake.jpeg
Thanks for being brutal! I think they just feel so much heavier due to the settings being chunkier. I can 'feel' them, so then I 'look' at them & think how different they look on me. And er, no, having TWO attached together would push me to the bottle :lol: Also, my parents studs are more tinted, whatever they may be, and these ones are E, so that would make me itch as when they're side by side you can really tell the difference.

I shall get over myself & consider myself told. And yes, actually, he HAS been hesitant to buy me any more jewellery when I've suggested it, so nail on the head right there. Apart from the Tiffany silver bangles a couple of weeks ago, he hasn't bought me anything else jewellery wise since my 40th, so obviously a cheaper outlay he was prepared to take a chance on. I'll mention this to him later on & get his thoughts. Thanks, my lovely!

ETA. About something else being at play, yes, possibly. The studs from my parents were the last big gift I got from them before my father died suddenly, so I am hugely attached to them. When I'm stressy I always reach for them, to see if I can't get a bit of intuition from him. So it could be that? I didn't ask for a new set & i'm making excuses to keep them in their box?
 

elizat

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Mar 23, 2013
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I think the new ones look great on you.

Understanding you are attached to the stones your parents gave you, what about a three stone band or ring? Maybe a bracelet that is delicate?

Maybe the center stone could be a colored stone to represent your father's birth month or a birth month of a child?

You could do the same thing with a bracelet concept. A birth stone for dad and/or your kids as well.

Like this:


A
 

1ofakind

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Aug 22, 2012
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I think they look perfect on you. I also have small lobes and do not think large studs look good on me but I wear dangles to compensate. I think if you wear them all the time you will get used to them quickly.

I also really like the bracelet @elizat suggested.
 

Alex T

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Oct 24, 2012
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I think the new ones look great on you.

Understanding you are attached to the stones your parents gave you, what about a three stone band or ring? Maybe a bracelet that is delicate?

Maybe the center stone could be a colored stone to represent your father's birth month or a birth month of a child?

You could do the same thing with a bracelet concept. A birth stone for dad and/or your kids as well.

Like this:

[/URL]

A
Love this idea! I also had a sudden flash of inspiration when I first got my new ones & was giddy & bedazzled, to make each stud into a solitaire pendant for the girls. I think with time & adjustment, I may very well do this, as then the sentimentality would carry on to them. I wouldn't want to break up my Tiffany pendant though. Not that I ever plan to sell it, but my kids might after I've fallen off the perch :lol:
 

dk168

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You'll get used to the new set in no time! And they look great on you!

How about turning the previous set into a 3-stone ring, or pendant, or bracelet?

DK :))
 

dk168

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BTW, I believe you should drop big hints about liking some small diamond huggies, as they will look good on you!

DK :Up_to_something::lol-2:
 

jbake

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Mar 30, 2018
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401
I’ll echo all the above. I think they look like a great size and not overwhelming at all. (It’s definitely possible I’m biased because those are very similar sizes to what I wear on a daily basis.) So to my eyes they look perfect.
The set from your parents looks lovely as well, so I can see your dilemma. I’d maybe try wearing the set from your husband daily for awhile to see if you acclimate. Then the set from your parents could be something you put on when you need a little boost of encouragement ❤
 

MRBXXXFVVS1

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+1 to @mrs-b and @elizat as I can't tell much of a difference between the 2 sizes.

Based on what you shared, it's the sentimentality of the original set that's creating the reservation/pause. I would have an honest talk with your DH and let him know how much you appreciate and love the gifts, especially the thought behind them, and the reason you haven't worn them yet is because of the sentimental nature of your current studs, but that you're maybe looking to reset them.

I love the idea of making the stones into necklaces for your DSs, but I would just caution that if they are very sentimental and the kids are young, they could get lost. I would wait until they are older before giving it to them. Just my 2 cents though. A 3-stone RHR or DBTY bracelet could be another option!
 
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gregchang35

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Sep 11, 2012
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There is a lot to unpack in your post....

There is much to be said/ felt/ emotionally attached to pieces of jewelry... or other items. They mean so much and their sentimental value far outweighs any logic, sometimes, if not all the time. This is the biggest “thing” to unpack/ unravel. Only time will help change that focus. It may never, and that is ok... cos that is what you value on the item.

as for the new set- yes, hubby spent a lot of money to gift you these. A lovely thought and a stunning gift. I do believe that jewelry is such a personal item to gift and the wearer’s approval sought before purchasing such gifts. (Here I am saying this and I already bought my girls some staple pieces. I digress.) your husband did great to gift something to add to your collection.... that is the second thing to unravel... this is a gift. Once again, you can place (sentimental) value or not to it. Currently, your previous earrings have more value and you wear it more often than the “new” one. As a jewelry nutter, no one buys me jewelry without my consent. Heirloom pieces excepted Lol. I do not know what your jewelry collection is like or how particular you are with your pieces, but, I sense that you would appreciate anything that you have been gifted.

as to the gift itself- I believe the proportions are great. They work well with your pendant. If anything, I think your ears could spot a slightly bigger size. Which in turn, means a bigger pendant!!! Lol DSS does creep in, sadly. And, the earrings and pendant habe to be all proportionately balanced!


there is no right or wrong way to feel about your value that you place on items. There is not to say that there are effects of that, which your husband has mentioned- future buying of jewelry will be limited. Yes- he spent time and $$, and feels it was unwarranted given you haven’t worn them a lot. I would feel it was a little waste as well.

A little side story: I gave my SO, a stunning blue (0.10FIB) diamond set in a custom ID style bracelet all with his input, as they were significant pieces and for his significant bday. He only wears it now and then. Was I deflated- absolutely!!! No one leaves that kinda bracelet in a drawer!!!!!! And it has been gifted almost 4 yrs ago and has been worn no more than 10 times. It needs to be fully appreciated!!! But... I have realised that it is HIS bracelet and HIS choice to wear it when he chooses. Did I have a great time sourcing all the elements and getting it for him- absolutely.... woudl I do it again- absolutely... I am a jewelry nutter!!!and he deserves the best. Lol... my point being- it is a significant gift and whilst am a little disappointed that the piece isn’t getting appreciated the way I thought he would (he still does when he wears it), it is his choice to wear it. I also believe that gift giving is also a two way street-The value was also equally spent in me making the gift...the dollar value went into the gifter and then the giftee.

that is how I view it... it may not be how you view it, and that is ok, too. A little insight to my thoughts.

If you want to balance your thought processes: Maybe you can wear these new earrings for a few months, or the next significant event, and change them out? Or change them every week?


There are many sides of your post but the biggest issue I think: the sentimental value of your earrings are higher than any value your husband can pay, currently.

Bling is bling... enjoy them.
Sentiment is sentiment. Reflect/ recoup/ breathe in/ breathe out. They live in your mind.... you can attach it to something and that is perfectly fine.

Good luck with the process.
 
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tyty333

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Gosh, I hate to tell people they are wrong (and I really never do), but you are WRONG! They look great on you and look perfect!

Before I read your whole post I was thinking they would look good with a pair of halo jackets! Imagine my surprise when you said
you were afraid they were too big! I think you are just used to the smaller ones and you need time to get used to seeing the bigger
ones on your ears! They really do look good so I hope you can get used to them! If you cant, they would make an adorable toi et moi
ring or bangle. Good luck!
 
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