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Are people who are out and about winning at life?

MRBXXXFVVS1

Brilliant_Rock
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I haven't left my house in 4 months to protect myself and family from COVID-19, as well as to help prevent community spread.

My lifestyle and preference is to be out and about outside of the home, traveling, exploring new places and restaurants, and spending quality time with family and friends. I'm definitely going stir crazy and have cabin fever, though I have the discipline to continue to stay at home as much as I dislike it, and am trying my best to manage mental and emotional well being. I'm trying to be positive and grateful for what I do have vs. grieving for my old life, but it's certainly hard. I know most of us are experiencing the same thing.

I can't help but think, are people who are carrying on with their lives, going out and about, seeing friends and family, taking trips, eating out, taking risks, etc. winning at life if they don't end up getting COVID? High risk, high reward? I'm actually a risk taker, except for when it comes to health. Is it best to have a balance (taking precautions with masks and distancing)?

I'm jealous of those who are carrying on with their lives (I know that is not becoming), as I feel like a prisoner in my own home. It will likely be another 1-2 years at best before there is a vaccine and herd immunity.

Am I making "impulsive" decisions like buying a bigger house or second home as a result of how I feel due to COVID? Will it meaningfully improve my situation, or is it just something to look forward to and keep me busy with only a little benefit at the end of the day? Or is that enough to justify it? I don't think I would be making the same decisions if COVID didn't exist, or at least I probably would be content in our current home for a few more years...
 

kenny

Super_Ideal_Rock
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Sure, if they don't die, or kill their grandparents and the old folk in their community.
So ... go out, make money, kill people.

Who cares?
All that matters is money.:dance:
 

MRBXXXFVVS1

Brilliant_Rock
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Sure, if they don't die, or kill their grandparents and the old folk in their community.
So ... go out, make money, kill people.

Who cares?
All that matters is money.:dance:

I think people are also out and about for the their personal happiness...not just for money!
 

nala

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I wrote a post about this in another thread. I recognized that I was becoming bitter Bc Of those who were out and about. So when malls opened up, And Yellowstone opened up and Las Vegas opened up and were gladly taking reservations, I went on a road trip. I hit a few casinos. I dined in restaurants. Went shopping. Hit a bar. Stayed in several hotels. Visited Yellowstone. It was soooo much fun while it lasted! But. When I got back, my paranoia over catching Covid was not fun at all! And now that bars and restaurants have been forced to stop serving indoors, I feel more cautious and guilty about going out. So I’ve been staying at home like I’m told. If i get bitter or envious, I remind myself that the 14 days of paranoia are not worth an evening out—to me, that is. But I’m comfortable going to the park, going shopping and eating outdoors—doing anything that is still legal, safe bc i social distance and wear a mask, and stimulates the economy.
As to your question about your house—I think only you know the answer but I will say that I almost upgraded my diamond to have something to look forward to and bc I was going to save casino money and other disposable income that usually goes to fun.
 
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kenny

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I think people are also out and about for the their personal happiness...not just for money!

Okay, so be happy while killing more innocent people.
 

YadaYadaYada

Super_Ideal_Rock
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Well maybe my view is a little different because mental illness runs in my family.

I could stay completely isolated in my home away from everyone indefinitely become immensely depressed and risk becoming suicidal.

Or I could live with some amount of caution and see select people, visit select places and retain my mental health and stay alive for my kids and husband.

That may seem dramatic but it isn't for people who are prone to severe depression. I choose the latter but everyone needs to make their own decision what amount of risk is appropriate.

If I was living my best life then there wouldn't be any worry or care, also I would still be employed, so not quite "best life" but as close as I can get given the current state of the world.

ETA: Also just wanted to mention that I was not going out or doing these things when the cases here were climbing and people were being hospitalized, we are in a state that has come down from the worst (for now). If we lived in a state where the numbers were climbing then I would stay home as much as possible.
 
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dk168

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I might have gone out and about, had a hair cut and went out for a meal indoors; however, I still avoid crowds and places where social distancing is neither possible or practical, and am not using public transport for the foreseeable future.

Life goes on, slowly but surely.

DK :))
 

Tekate

Ideal_Rock
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My mom always said to me (especially when I was marrying husband #1) Marry in haste, repent in leisure. So buying, changing etc is because you don't really feel like you have control in your life, by that I mean, you can't go out and you want to, to buy something or renovate gives you control over your environment :) Sometimes I get so sad I want to just to my favorite restaurant with my best friends and have some Palomas and eat Tex Mex, I want that life BACK. I know it's selfish, I don't have any real money problems, my car works, I'm building a nice house, I have decent health (except my shoulder) I am a grannie! I miss my 15 mo old sweetie pie.. I miss her terribly, I miss my son in Brooklyn, I miss him like I would miss my arms and legs.. I feel often like I have no control and then I talk myself down and say all the good things I have now.

Who ever knew that we would live thru a pandemic, I always surmised our government and medical agencies would be able to fix anything. :(
 

nala

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I want to add that Covid is so divisive, even without taking politics into account. Here is why: Essentials put themselves at risk daily, as if their lives mattered less than the rest who are working from home. Then target and Costco get an edge over their competition and make tons of money, while small businesses are going bankrupt. As if those stores are immune to Covid. Then those of us who are supporting the economy by venturing out have to wonder if the employees are glad we are there or angry bc we are jeopardizing them. Then the idea that death is a part of life and we lose more people to cancer and heart disease and the world doesn’t stop— we don’t shut down McDonald’s to prevent obesity —and you see why things get complicated. So what we are seeing is that some of us are resentful of those who are taking a chance when in reality—we don’t know if those who are out living were essentials all along and have realized that if they have to work, they might as well be entitled to live their best lives. So I’m learning to live and let live and to stop being so judgey. The truth is that very few people can afford to or can handle living in a bubble. Most of us will have to view or new normal the way we view driving a car... we are at the mercy of others when we drive, not just ourselves. Sorry for the rambling but it helps me come to terms with my new normal. And no, I don’t feel like I have inadvertently killed anyone bc I always wear a mask and I keep a distance.
 
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Dancing Fire

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As I said many time here we have no choice b/c we are babysitting our grandkids. As for others depending how comfortable they feel about going out.

My brother and his wife been hiding under their bed waiting for a vaccine to come out, IOW maybe at least another 6-8 months, beside we don't know if any vaccine will be effective against the virus. My brother can wait till the cows come home or till he needs to check into a mental hospital whichever comes first. I think mentally is killing him inside as each day go by... nuts.gif
 

kb1gra

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yeah, I'm going out. I would have gone out the whole time if I could.

It's okay to go to Target and buy patio furniture, but totally fatally unsafe to sit at a restaurant for half an hour?

Not safe to go to a bar, but totally safe to go to Disney World or the beach.

As I've maintained the whole time, if you are in close contact to at risk individuals, then you have to make your own decisions. I work from home, live with one other young adult, have no children.

I don't need to stay home in Massachusetts because people in Los Angeles have rising case counts. The two things are not related. Trying to use one to justify the other doesn't work.

I wear my mask and follow the pointless rules that other people don't follow or people follow in such a way that makes them meaningless. I wash my hands and carry hand sanitizer like I always did.

I got H1N1 years ago and nearly died. We didn't shut down the world for that.
 

MRBXXXFVVS1

Brilliant_Rock
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For those staying at home, how do you cope with the new "normal"?
 

tyty333

Super_Ideal_Rock
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@MRBXXXFVVS1 I've been told not to make big decisions under stress and these are certainly stressful times.

On the other hand, it is times like these that remind us that we are not immortal and perhaps we should take that risk
and buy a bigger home/second home. Try to see your life in the future after we have a vaccine for covid. Will you be
happy with the decision you made? Might you wish you used that money for something else (travel perhaps)? You
can always sell a house (a pain, yes). These are such tough times with tough decisions. I wish you peace in whatever
decision you make.
 

Dancing Fire

Super_Ideal_Rock
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Sure, if they don't die, or kill their grandparents and the old folk in their community.
So ... go out, make money, kill people.

Who cares?
All that matters is money.:dance:
We are the grandparents ;)) so there are no one else to kill. It would kill us mentally if we don't see our families for months, plus there are no guarantee when this pandemic will be over, 2 months from now? 2 yrs from now?... Idunno1.gif . We'll try to live our lives as normal as possible. No I'm not going to the bar or beach.
 

lyra

Ideal_Rock
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We still have most lockdown restrictions, but some things are opening up. I do not go more than a mile from my home. I have only been to a couple of places, always with a mask. I have an infusion appt. every 6 weeks. We don't technically have any covid patients in my city. But I'm still ordering masks online and preparing a bit for the next wave. I have to balance the rare bit of going out with being secluded and getting anxious and/or depressed.

I'm not ready to go to the grocery store or hardware store, or get my hair cut which is quite an ordeal these days. DH is travelling again in 10 days, which worries me. Yes, it seems like some people are just going about their lives. Not me so much, and it makes me discontent at times.
 

minousbijoux

Super_Ideal_Rock
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Funny, but it never crossed my mind to be jealous of those going out and about, seeing friends and family, taking trips, eating out, taking risks, etc. I don't particularly like staying home so much of the time, but I also don't feel that comfortable going out these days. It's not the same - most of the people I see when I go out seem tense (including me). I do worry about getting sick. So while I don't want to be home, I don't want to be out either!
 

Dancing Fire

Super_Ideal_Rock
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Okay, so be happy while killing more innocent people.
AFAIK I haven't killed any innocent people.

Kenny, If I get mentally ill from this lockdown I'll come looking for you. You can be my first victim ... :Up_to_something:
 

mellowyellowgirl

Ideal_Rock
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I don't think they're winning. I think they're making life choices that are appropriate for them.

I've been trying to establish a new Covid Normal so this means doing anything legal that I'm comfortable with. Haven't been to a bar or caught a bus.

I don't think I'm killing anyone. Who am I killing exactly? I don't go anywhere near the elderly. There are barely any people on the train and if they choose to catch the train obviously they're happy to assume the same risk as me. I'm not hanging out at hospitals. The grocery shops are full of teenager essential workers and I only touch what I buy so it's not like I'm sneezing on teens and killing them.

Anyone who has chosen to drastically isolate is obviously not eating at the same restaurant that I am so I can't kill them. If they're eating out then they're assuming a certain amount of risk just like I am.

I find the "oh but you'll killing everyone" argument a bit ridiculous. The people bunkering down are in a bunker. How can I kill them by eating sushi?
 

mellowyellowgirl

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Forgot to answer about the house so here it is!

I'm biased OP because I just bought a house just before Covid and it's been such a bright spot for us.

There is soooooo much more space which really helped during lockdown. My sister has her own room and come summer if we get locked down again we have our own pool.

It would have been more challenging to lock down at the old house.

Bigger homes are not essential but if they enhance your life and you can afford it, why not? I'm all for doing whatever makes life a bit brighter these days. As long as it's legal!
 

OreoRosies86

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Are they winning at life? Maybe. But maybe they get the virus and die a horrific death.

Not a risk I’m going to take. So my version of winning is to stay home. I love being here anyway, I love spending time with my family and cooking, getting takeout from my favorite spots.

I wear a mask when I do need to briefly go out. I believe I am doing what I need to do to protect my mom and other immunity compromised loved ones.
 

qubitasaurus

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I think it might be a calculated risk thing -- you get some benefit out of going out but what risk do you incur. If the risk is minimal and the likely outcome is theyll be fine even if they catch it then I suspect they are winning.

But I would note there are a bunch of states where the positivity rate of the tests (25% or so returning positive) suggests they may only be picking up 1/10 of the cases. And alarmingly they're still registering almost 10 k cases a day. You'd have to then decide by the states population to really evaluate the risk but it's quite possibly high at the moment in many areas.

Even then I cant see anything wrong with going for a walk of a morning, if you got up sufficiently early itd be peaceful and it might take the edge off being stuck indoors.
 

Matata

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I have no issue with your choices and I want to address some of your points from a broader perspective. Your assumptions must be that 1) you're not currently infected; 2) that you're not going to get infected.

I don't think I'm killing anyone. Who am I killing exactly?

Perhaps you're killing yourself which is a risk you've said you're prepared to take.

I don't go anywhere near the elderly.

In quite a few areas of the US (I don't know if you live in the US), the largest numbers of new infections are in young people.

Anyone who has chosen to drastically isolate is obviously not eating at the same restaurant that I am so I can't kill them.

But you can potentially infect, when you're infected, anyone with whom you come in contact. New data on the virus shows that the potential for infection is greater in enclosed spaces (such as restaurants, shops, churches etc) with air circulating systems (heat, air conditioning, fans). The chances of getting exposed in those places is greater than when outdoors.

I find the "oh but you'll killing everyone" argument a bit ridiculous. The people bunkering down are in a bunker. How can I kill them by eating sushi?

Well duh, it's the people who are in the same restaurant eating sushi that you can "kill" and who can "kill" you. It would have been more accurate for kenny to use "infect" since we know that not everyone who gets infected dies.

And lastly, it's easy to talk about assuming personal risk when you're healthy and not suffocating and drowning from fluid filled lungs.

I'm not as afraid of dying from covid-19 as I am of surviving it with any one of the horrible chronic lifelong debilitating physical ailments that aren't getting sufficient coverage in the news.
 

mellowyellowgirl

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@Matata what I was trying to say is most of the people who I could potentially infect have chosen to assume the risk just like I've chosen to assume the risk I'm taking. And it is legal since the restaurants are open legally here.

So what exactly is the issue?

Are you suggesting we should lock down everyone for a few years and take away the choice to assume any risk at all?

I'm super curious as to what the problem is exactly. I'm certainly not suggesting that other people should go out and eat sushi and they're stupid for not doing that. I totally respect their choice to stay home and stay safe.

Are people offended by my riskier choices because they're worried that through a chain of infection I'll accidentally contaminate a packet of oatmeal that they had home delivered and give them Covid despite them hiding out for months on end? Is this why people are getting upset at others?

Do you believe that you should dictate the amount of risk I take for my own good?

Genuinely curious!
 
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Mekp

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If I lived in the USA I wouldn't be leaving my house either. The numbers there are horrifying. I'm still being quite cautious here in Canada.

As for the house, I understand wanting a project during these times. I got a puppy for the same reason. Perhaps if you're questioning it that's a sign it's not the time for it. I think only you (and your spouse if applicable) can really answer if now is the time for a new or second house.
 

OreoRosies86

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For the record I don’t consider what I’m doing living in a “bunker” or “hiding out.” Being reasonably cautious and considerate of others, yes.
 

Matata

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@Matata what I was trying to say is most of the people who I could potentially infect have chosen to assume the risk just like I've chosen to assume the risk I'm taking. And it is legal since the restaurants are open legally here.

So what exactly is the issue?

The issue is that you and others eating in that restaurant have chosen to take the risk. But when you get infected, you have the potential to infect others who have not chosen to take the same level of risk. Someone walking by the restaurant as you leave, someone stocking grocery store shelves etc. I think that is the issue with those who claim people going out are killing others. There is only so much control we each have over our own actions and even when we're careful, we still have a chance of being infected. Those who are fearful about being "killed" are fearing the lack of control they have over others' actions that can affect them.

Just because restaurants are legally open doesn't mean squat. It's the reopenings that have contributed to the increases in cases.
 

mellowyellowgirl

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The issue is that you and others eating in that restaurant have chosen to take the risk. But when you get infected, you have the potential to infect others who have not chosen to take the same level of risk. Someone walking by the restaurant as you leave, someone stocking grocery store shelves etc. I think that is the issue with those who claim people gong out are killing others. There is only so much control we each have over our own actions and even when we're careful, we still have a chance of being infected. Those who are fearful about being "killed" are fearing the lack of control they have over others' actions that can affect them.

Just because restaurants are legally open doesn't mean squat. It's the reopenings that have contributed to the increases in cases.

So basically you think that society should cater to those who are most risk averse?

If someone wants to hide for the next 2 years I should not undermine their choices and since the only way to do that is to also hide too until the most risk adverse members of society deem it ok to emerge?

ETA: I realise you're just explaining to me the viewpoints of super risk averse people so I apologise if my responses sound snippy. It's hard to question and debate without sounding snippy! Just want to make sure you know I'm not trying to be a b#tch on purpose!
 
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Dancing Fire

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Just because restaurants are legally open doesn't mean squat. It's the reopenings that have contributed to the increases in cases.
But not with the thousands of protesters who were out on the streets. I'm sure they didn't contributed to any new cases...:rolleyes:
 

Matata

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So basically you think that society should cater to those who are most risk averse?
If someone wants to hide for the next 2 years I should not undermine their choices and since the only way to do that is to also hide too until the most risk adverse members of society deem it ok to emerge?

Oh hell no. I think we should just accept that people are going to die from this or its aftereffects and not beat our breasts in faux mortification for all the young people who are now dying in hospitals, for all the little kids who are experiencing horrific issues, for all the elderly who continue to die. I have no problem at all with mother nature clearing out the overload of homo sapiens who are driving so many other species to extinction. When all those who are hiding emerge from their basements, the world just might be a better place.
 
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