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I''m off - for now... Engagement not forseeable

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perry

Ideal_Rock
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Joined
Sep 19, 2004
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2,547
Dear fellow pricescope members.

It is with a sad heart that I ask to be removed from the list because at this time there does not look like there will be an engagement with "D"

"D" is just not there yet. She is a nice person; but, at this time cannot support some of my key dreams and goals in life. She knows that such support is necessary for whomever I should marry.

There is a difference between "what would be nice to do - when convenient" and "what I will do - as a routine"

We will still be freinds, and in fact she is still visiting this weekend: but only as a freind (and yes she has a full understanding of this).

She was also surprised by the fact that I did not get upset or anything at her. Niether my getting angry - nor my trying to force her to be something she is not will help either of us.

But, I can always use a good freind.

Who knows, perhaps someday she will be willing to take that step of true committment. Who knows, I might still be available then. However, it is clear that it is not now - and that we are not mooving closer on things; and it is clear that there is no timetable on things.

Far better for us to have found this out now, than later.

So here is to freindship - long and lasting. That in itself is worth its weight in "D" internally flawless diamonds.

And, should any of you have a freind my way (NE Wisconsin) or one willing to relocate you might want to let them know that there is this interesting guy that might be interested later this year...

Perry

ps: Yes, I still have that matched set of side diamonds.... I''m hanging onto them.
 

MissAva

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Mar 6, 2005
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8,230
I am sorry that you are hurting, but I think you are doing the right thing.
 

Blue824

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Dec 15, 2004
Messages
1,614
Perry, sorry to hear that is how the situation turned out. You seem to have this very well thought out, and you''re right, it is much better to decide this sooner, rather than later. It might be hard now, but I wish you lots of happiness in your future
 

msb700

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Jan 3, 2005
Messages
1,260
Perry, sorry to hear how things turned out in the end, but at least u now know where u stand in this relationship and how it is instead of all the wondering and questions u had..U have been very supportive and understanding thru out this time with ''D'' and the unwanted house guest where many others would have walked out the door...that on its own speaks volumes about u and ur kindness...

i wish u all the best and i hope things work out for u...good luck!
 

Croí

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Nov 12, 2004
Messages
378

oh Perry, I am really sorry but I do agree with the others - you have done the ABSOLUTE right thing.

I ended an eleven year relationship with someone I loved to bits, because he wasn''t on the same page as I. Now I''m happily married to someone who is far more a ''partner'' to me than he was; we are both on the same path and facing in the same direction ... and walking at the same pace. It''s a wonderful feeling. My ex is still single - and I am pretty sure that is how he wants to keep things for him. He is happy not taking the marriage road and I am happy we didn''t (wrongly) try to take it together.

It will all work out. Please don''t be a stranger. We would all still love to hear from you and you can always PM for e-mail or messaging info. I''m always up for a chat !

chin up and best of luck to you
C
 

AndyRosse

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jul 25, 2004
Messages
4,363
Oh Perry, I know it''s tough. But you know you did the right thing. You seem like a wonderful guy!
 

Angel7

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Jan 18, 2005
Messages
1,997
Oh I''m sorry Perry.
8.gif

At least you realized it now before things went any further.

I wish you nothing but the best and I hope you''ll still be around on PS.
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ame

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jul 7, 2004
Messages
10,869
Oh man, so sorry to hear that!
 

caligal

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Jun 16, 2005
Messages
470
Perry-

I''m so sorry to hear about that. As God closes one door he opens another window- and I do believe you have a very bright future with someone who will appreciate all you have to give!
 

FireGoddess

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jan 25, 2005
Messages
12,145
Perry, I''ve been keeping track of your story with "D" and I just have to say that you sound like such a kind hearted and patient person - I wish I knew someone in your neck of the woods!!! I''m sorry things worked out this way - I know that just a few weeks ago you were debating about proposing or not. I think that you have been in a place for a long time where you could give "D" what she needs and wants, but she has never been in that place...the place where she could give you what you need and want. So I think you have made a difficult but ultimately correct decision to abandon pursuit of a deeper relationship with "D" than just friendship. I do hope you find someone who is truly the yin to your yang and that it happens when you are ready for it to happen.

Good luck!
 

cute330xigrl

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Aug 31, 2004
Messages
428
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awww! Soo sorry Perry! I''m @ a loss for words.... But wish you all the best!
 

stacyQ

Rough_Rock
Joined
Sep 2, 2005
Messages
61
Sorry to hear that Perry. Just make sure that being friends with "D" doesn''t interfere with you moving on and finding another great gal that will support you and believe in you. Holding out for someone like that only hurts yourself. And trust me, there are plenty of gals out there dying for a guy like you!!!!!!! Take care,
Stacy
 

MINE!!

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Feb 25, 2005
Messages
3,287
WOW.. I am so sorry to hear about it.. I know it must be hard.. but hang in there and day after day.. things will get better... *hugs*
 

blueroses

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Nov 15, 2004
Messages
3,282
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Sorry to hear it, Perry....but I am sure that this is the right choice. You have an open and generous heart, and the right partner for you will appear. I agree with what StacyQ said....maintaining a friendship with "D" is all well and good, BUT just be aware so that it doesn''t become a hindrance to your moving forward--at least initially.

We are here for you!!!
 

stacyQ

Rough_Rock
Joined
Sep 2, 2005
Messages
61
And you don''t have to take yourself off of the board, engagement is only the topic of interest, but what people do here is support and help (and give their two cents, which is worth a lot). I have a guy friend that was in your situation several years ago. He is still waiting for his ex to come back and refuses to talk about it with anyone. If nothing else, the people here will "keep you real" and look out for your own best interests, even when you don''t feel like doing it yourself.
 

DiamanteBlu

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jul 12, 2005
Messages
2,501
Perry -

I''m sorry your engagement is not going to work out right now. No reason to disappear, though!

Blu
 

AmberGretchen

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jan 6, 2005
Messages
7,770
Perry - so sorry to hear about your bad experience. I do think you did the right thing and your posts have demonstrated your incredible patience and maturity and capacity for understanding. I am confident there is a wonderful woman out there who will appreciate that and everything else you have to offer. And I agree with the other girls - stick around as you work through getting over this and let us know how your process of looking for that woman goes.
 

cinnabar

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Nov 29, 2004
Messages
386
I''m sorry to hear things didn''t work out for you Perry. You sound like the nicest guy and you deserve happiness, I hope it comes to find you.

Hey, don''t limit yourself to Wisconsin girls though ... I met my husband through a message board just like this, we lived 5000 miles apart at the time, and neither of us was looking for love, but it just happened.

Good luck and very best wishes, as well as some hugs for the broken heart. Hang in there.
 

platinumrock

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Mar 13, 2005
Messages
2,262
Perry, I''m a firm believer that things happen for a reason. When my first serious relationship ended, I was devastated. It took me years to accept the loss and "what could have been". Had I stayed in that relationship, I would have missed out on my wonderful husband.

I know it''s easier said than done.....but it does get easier and better with time. Your future wife is still out there, and she''s looking for you. So don''t give up until you find each other!
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