Conflicted

[bookworm240]

I went to some B&T stores yesterday and bought a ring I am going to return. I have had a hard time deciding what I really want. A band, a gemstone ring, one ring, two rings. I have 2 children - 2 and 4. I am turning 40 this summer so I thought the ring would make a great gift.

But I am feeling guilty. My budget is around 3k (DH would go higher), and I keep thinking,"That''s a mortgage payment" or "People are going without food...do I really need." "Maybe I should get something less expensive"....I have a lot of voices in my head. But that''s for another thread.

We have the money....but the guilt, I think, is contributing to the indecision.

Anyone???

 

[freefly]

I was just telling a friend of mine how lucky I feel to not have financial problems and to have the ability to buy myself such pretty things, but that I shouldn''t be spending so much money on things I don''t really need, when she told me it must be my karma for having been generous in a past life. Now, I don''t know how true this is, but if you are lucky enough to be able to afford a couple of luxuries once in a while, enjoy them without guilt. If, on the other hand, buying such things puts you in debt, well, then you may want to re think the purchase.

As for what to narrow your choice down to, I can''t be of any help. When I can''t decide, I buy them all.

 

[ma re]

We all have some price tag limits, above which (with current incomes) we just wouldn''t feel comfortable wearing the piece. Set your priorities straight, resolve issues that are real concerns and then indulge in some treats. The good thing is that with jewellery, there are so many options. You can go with things like gemstone alternatives (less expensive varieties that look similar to some more expensive ones) or change the design slightly so that it costs you less (like buying a three stone ring instead of a larger solitaire). Not to mention metal choices or getting a pre-made setting and having a stone of choice set in it.

 

[D&T]

ask me this five years ago, I would have felt guilty, but now that we are more financially stable and we buy everything in cash for the last two and half years, I feel guilt free for my elaborate spending, however I went four years with the bare essentials of life. So once in a while you should indulge yourself. As for confuse on what you want, oh believe me I''ve been there for the last year, and finally narrowed down what I truly wanted to fit my lifestyle, even though some were recycled projects. Maybe just a suggestion, make a folder and put all your ideas and thoughts down in that folder and see what are the common elements. Because I have truly been there, whether I wanted gemstone in my e-ring, or a wide band, or two wedding band flanking my ring and etc. Guess what I ended up with multiple of rings and reset, but I don''t regret it, because now I have all these peices to enjoy and it was bought with cash as well I can sure say they were bought for all these holidays in one year...lol (its my birthday, mother''s day, anniversary and christmas gifts all lumped into one, or mulitple pieces)

 

[bookworm240]

D&T and Ma ra....thanks so much!!! I am going to take your advice and get some photos together of what I like. I think I am really interested in an estate piece and perhaps re-think the budget. Thanks so much!!

 

[Stone Hunter]

Yes D&T is a great PS role model. I too save many things to my computer that appeal to me. It does help. And I''ve made a list of jewelry desires and put them in order by price. That way for an occassion if the budget is known then I''ll know what I like in that price range. Hope that makes sense and helps you!

I do realize that this is a big important purchase for you GO 40!! But take your time and get it right.

 

[bookworm240]

Stone hunter - another great idea. I admire your organizational skills!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Stone Hunter]

Thanks! I''m glad you understood what I meant. Sometimes it''s just hard to pick though, so take your time.