Ideas on how to propose to a guy??

[SlotterHouz]

I love this guy, Ive decided im going to propose. Im scared shitless... Help???

By the way, my mom is kind of racist, she does not want me marring a white man. Any ideas on how to make her understand? I havnt told her yet...

 

[Volred]

Your mother may not be able to trust the white man.
But she could make an exception for this one?? Maybe.

He should come over more often, get to know the family, help out.

I know where I am coming from. I am the white guy. Her parents talked to her when we first started dating, told her that if I disrepected her, I was disrepecting her family. They really didnt trust me till after I was done school, and we had about 3 years of dating under our belts. I guess they realized that I am going to stay and not break her heart. Her once racist/cautious of the white man parents now trust me. I go golfing with her dad, her brother talks to me now, her mother gets me to bring laundry downstairs.

I had to work my way into their hearts, and get them to trust me.

As for your other question, I cannot help you here.
LADIES?!? come help her out.

 

[winyan]

My SO is Scots Irish, I'm as I think you all know by now, am American Indian.

My mom was actually worse than my Dad about the 'white' man. She didn't like the Irish "(they drink)" and the Scots "(they're cheap)". However my SO is so loving and giving he eventually won them over.

I honestly think it depends on the individual, and the more they interact with each other, the more accepting they will become.

Right now our extended family consists of myself, AI, a cousin who's Irish married to a Kenyan tribal lady, another Italian Irish cousin married to a woman from Mexico City, and the Kenyan cousin's sister is dating a man from Korea.

It's a small world, and it gets smaller every day.

Love is the answer.

win

 

[fire&ice]

Racial issue aside, you clearly have some family problems. I don't think proposing to the "guy" is the answer.

More importantly how does he feel? What does he think about getting married?

 

[Nicrez]

Proposing is a big step. It means joining two FAMILIES...not just two people. My boyfriend and I are getting engaged this year, and my family knew about it after 4 months. They refused to meet him, as I am white, and he is Indian. My father has been the worst, and still refuses to ackowledge our relationship, but at least we made many mature attempts to hammer out the differences, but we did consider our families with quite a bit of concern on both parts. His family is so wonderful with me, and it's only because they saw I will not change their son, or take him away. Make sure your boyfriend shows that he likes you for who you are, vice versa, always shows respect to your family, as you would to his, and remember that what angers us now, doesn't always anger us years down the line, after we've been proved wrong... By the way, try proposing low key and include a place, or things you know he likes...like a golf weekend, or hunting trip, or baseball tickets. Propose at the right time when you are both happy and you can use a nice watch, or chain. Engraving is also a nice memorable touch. Good luck and bless you both!

 

[innerkitten]

Was that supposed to be the guy she wants to propose to? I'm confused or was that just someone in a similar situation??

 

[godiva]

I'm Asian and my soon to be fiance is white (Canadian+++).
Fortunately my mom (also Asian) is very open minded. She worked in an industry full of foreigners all her life and re-married an American. So I don't ever worry about things like race. I actually consider myself a German because I love the country so much. It's always been an iside joke between me and my fiance.
But I think it depends on how important your relationship is between you and your mom. If marrying your man worth any tension between you and your mom? I think if the answer is yes, you should propose and try to work out the situation with your mom. But was the original question about "how to" rather than "should I?"

 

[Pearl]

I know exactly what you folks are talking about. I am Hawaiian and my boyfriend is white, and it taking awhile for my Dad to get used to the idea. He's getting better, although he still mentions comments about Captain Cook and Haoles raping the land etc to my Mom. I think the biggest thing that he is scared of is losing me. Anyway, like I said he is getting better about it, it just takes time.